 The narcissist will weigh you down, there will be too badly organized to function efficiently, without order, without command, direction or instruction, there will be slow or complicated and therefore inefficient, there will be difficult to analyze or understand, difficult to work with, there will be oppressive or burdensome to you, there will unjustly inflict hardship and constraint on you, there will weigh heavily on your mind or spirit, causing you anxiety and depression, the narcissist will weigh you down, you will feel as though you are carrying a large ankle weight with you, wherever you go, you will feel heavy as so you cannot move easily because you are carrying their problems, you are carrying their emotional baggage, we all have feelings about our past and the things that have happened to us and sometimes this can have a negative effect on our behavior or attitude, sometimes we have to check ourselves so that we can treat these feelings that we are experiencing but the narcissist does not have enough awareness to do this, instead of seeing the faults or inefficiencies of their own behavior or attitude, they tend to only see the faults in other people, they don't want to accept that they are at fault, they don't want to accept their flaws or imperfections and that is why they have so much emotional baggage, it has accumulated over the many years that they chose to avoid any reflection on their own behavior or attitude, anytime that a problem would come up where they made a fault or mistake and they were to blame, they chose to shift the blame onto someone else, anytime that they were triggered to reflect on a flaw or imperfection, they chose to project their insecurities onto someone else, never acknowledging that maybe it might have had something to do with them and because they chose to deny the existence of it, it never went away, this is what they are throwing onto you, anytime that a problem or issue comes up, the reason why they react so emotionally, the reason why their reactions can often seem so exaggerated is because it is bringing up all of the unresolved issues of their past, all of their unhealed traumas, things that they didn't want to deal with at the time, things that they chose to deny the existence of and that is essentially what narcissism is, it is the denial of their current state or condition, denial of reality, the failure to acknowledge an unacceptable truth or emotion or to admit it into consciousness, it is a coping mechanism and a defence mechanism and they are defending against their own thoughts and feelings about themselves, deep down they are very insecure, they believe that they are not enough and that is why whenever a problem or issue comes up and they begin to reflect on their insecurities, the first thing they are going to do is do whatever it takes to make you feel insecure, to make you feel as though you are not enough, they have to project their feelings of insecurity onto you, that is the only way that they can feel secure, they cannot deal with their own thoughts or feelings about themselves and that is why they are carrying this emotional baggage, that is why they react so emotionally, that is why their reactions can often seem so exaggerated because you are dealing with someone who feels as though they are under attack, they are in survival mode, they are doing everything they can to survive emotionally, whenever you do or say something that might trigger them to reflect on their faults, mistakes, flaws or imperfections, they will become hostile, they will become opposed to anything and everything that you are saying because they are defending against their own thoughts and feelings about themselves, if they have done something wrong, if they have done something that is less than perfect, if they have done something that is not good enough, it will open the floodgates to everything else in their past that made them feel insecure, it will cause a narcissistic injury, it will injure their false sense of pride and their inflated ego and they are going to feel as though you are trying to hurt them because they do feel hurt and the narcissist believes that their feelings are facts, if they feel hurt that means that you must have hurt them, so now they are going to defend themselves, they are going to defend their false sense of pride and their inflated ego and they will do that by doing whatever it takes to injure your sense of self-esteem or self-impotence, they will point out your faults or mistakes, your flaws or imperfections, even if they are things that have nothing to do with the current argument or disagreement, the narcissist is in a fight for their lives, they are fighting for the life of their false self and if you are not going to validate their false self or the illusion that they are trying to portray then that must mean that you are against them, that must mean that you are their enemy, once they have it set in their minds that you are against them, there is really nothing that they won't say or do, if you stop bringing up the problems or issues and continue validating their false self and their illusions they will continue displaying them to you, as long as you remain susceptible to their manipulation they can be kind to you but once you try to present any form of truth or reality to them they are going to feel as though you are trying to hurt them, they don't want to deal with any truth or reality, the whole nature of narcissism is that they want to remain in denial, they want to continue living in their little fantasy world, they want to continue living in their little bubble which is isolated from reality, even if it is unreal, even if it is nothing more than an illusion that is just wrongly perceived or interpreted by the senses, a deceptive appearance or impression, a false belief, it's more appealing to them, it's more attractive or interesting and the truth is just too painful for them to deal with, they don't want to accept the truth about who they are, they want their little fantasy and there is nothing that you can do to pull them out of it, if you try to pop their bubble, if you try to disprove, ruin or destroy their fantasy delusion or misbelief, they will see it as an assault on their character, they will see it as though you are trying to hurt them because any exposure to reality could be potentially harmful or dangerous to the narcissist and they are highly likely to respond in a very hostile manner towards you, so what does this mean for you, it means that it is going to hinder your spiritual and mental development because without accountability, without the acceptance of truth and reality, you cannot grow or develop, you might be able to be accountable for your faults and mistakes, you might be able to accept the truth or reality of the situation but the narcissist does not want to do that, they do not want to hold themselves accountable for anything, they do not want to be responsible, they do not want to respond to the best of their ability, so instead of working with them and building a momentum of power and strength towards your growth and development, you are now sailing against the wind, you are working against them because they are opposed to what you are trying to do, they are opposed to accountability and responsibility, they are opposed to any acceptance of the truth or reality of the situation, they are opposed to anything outside of their fantasy world, anything outside of their little bubble and as long as you remain in that little bubble with them, as long as you continue validating their false self and the illusion that they are trying to portray, as long as you remain in agreement with them and remain in denial of the truth and reality of the situation, you are going to remain stuck in a place where there is no growth or development and any time that you try to present a problem or issue to them, they are not going to acknowledge it, if you continue to pressure them it will bring up their unresolved emotional baggage and traumas, things that they didn't deal with in the past and they are not going to deal with it now, they are just going to throw it onto you and expect you to carry it and it is going to weigh you down, it is going to feel heavy and make you feel as though you cannot move easily, you might become stressed, you might develop anxiety or depression and you are not going to be able to get things done, you are going to fall deeper and deeper into a downward spiral of negative energy and dysfunction until you lose sight of the position where you once resided. Thank you for watching, I hope this video resonated with you, please like, comment, share and subscribe, click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos, if you would like to donate, my paypal link is in the video description, coaching enquiries you can email me at nagsforumcoaching at joomle.com, thank you for watching and I will talk to you soon.