 The Kraft Foods Company presents Willard Waterman as The Great Gilder Sleeve. The Great Gilder Sleeve is brought to you each week by The Kraft Foods Company, makers of Parquet Margarine. Big news! Tonight we're announcing first week's winners in Parquet Margarine's $83,500 Name the Twins contest. Yes, four glamorous Ford Victorias have already been awarded and you'll hear the winners' names at the close of tonight's program. We're now in the middle of our third weekly contest. You have until midnight Saturday to try for the four beautiful Ford Victorias and 230 other prizes that will be won this week. Full instructions in our next announcement have paper and pencil ready. Tonight's Great Gilder Sleeve program and this exciting contest are brought to you by Parquet Margarine, the margarine that tastes so good because it's always fresh. Try Parquet tomorrow. Get P-A-R-K-A-Y Parquet Margarine made by Kraft. Now, the Great Gilder Sleeve. April in the air this fine afternoon in Summerfield and spring is coming right out in the open. You can see it in the gardens and the trees and in the lighthearted step of the Great Gilder Sleeve as he turns the corner heading for home. I'm as busy as the spider spinning daydreams. I'm as giddy as a baby on the tree. Oh, hello, Leroy. I'm sure glad you're coming home, Unk. Yes, thank you, my boy. How's everything with the family? That's why I'm glad you're coming home. What a bunch of droopy characters. What's this? Margarine, Bronco and Birdie. You know what we ought to do, Unk? You what? We ought to boycott them. Boycott? Picket them. Yover, Leroy. I'm boiling. Yes, oh, I see. What a family. You said that. Most twins. What about the twins? Old Marge and Bronco, just because they're the mother and father, they think they owe most kids. He is well. Holy cow. Can't even get near them. Before you can get in the room, you've got to be pasteurized. Well, I know, my boy. Margarine and Bronco and Birdie are like three mother hens with those babies. Hens? Ah, eagles. Well, you'll have to be patient, Leroy. But why can't I hold them? You'll be able to hold them after a while. Why can't I feed them? What's to put in a bottle in a kid's mouth? I know which end the milk comes out of. Well, you just bide your time, my boy. So I don't understand that Margarine and Bronco and Birdie are only thinking of what's best for the babies. We should be glad they feel that way. We should be proud of them. Now, let's go in the house and I'll be one happy family again. OK. The boy's all right now. I brought him around. You'll just leave you a born diplomat. Hello, everybody. We're home. I'm Ivy. Feeding the babies. Come on, Leroy. Let's see the little type. Can I feed one of the monkeys? No, my boy. Let's be patient. Hello, Marjorie. Hello, Anki and Leroy. Hi. Good evening, Betty. It's a little difficult, isn't it? Holding the two bottles. I'll feed the boy if you like. You better let Birdie do it, Anki. I'll take them. Come on, little fella. Yes, she, Anki. They take the bottle much better from someone they know. Well, they know me, my dear. They know me, too. Well, of course they do, but at a distance. I'm sick. Here. I'll take the little girl and let her finish up the bottle. You just came home from the office, Anki. You're tired. No, I'm not. I feel fine. You must be tired. You go out and I'll hold the baby while you rest. I could hold it while you both rest. Oh, she's going to sleep now. I'll hold her. This little man's ready for bed. He's stuffed. Great. I'll carry him in, Birdie. I'll take him, Birdie. All right, Marjorie. You take the boy and I'll take the little girl. All right, George. I'm going to get a baby out of there somehow. Hello, folks. Yeah, Bronco. Where'd he come from? Yeah, hello, Bronco. Margie and I were just getting ready to carry the twins into the nursery. Come on, little girl. Well, little daughter. Come to daddy. Hey, wait a minute. Here we go. You what about me? Maybe I'll hear something for you. Yeah, I'll what? You can carry the blankets into the nursery. I got them. Yes, sir. You can carry these. Four safety pins. The whole thing for themselves. They'd be different if they only had one baby. They have two. They can spare one. I didn't say anything. I'm reading the paper, Leroy. Uncle Mort, Bronco and I are going to the movie tonight. Would you like to go with us? Movie? No, I wouldn't care to, my dear. You and Bronco and Leroy go. I'll be the babysitter. But, Uncle... I don't think I'll go either. I should stay here with Uncle. But, Birdie's going to be here. Birdie can take the evening off. But you've never taken care of the babies alone, Anki. I've been around lots of other babies. They're all alike. Sure. They all operate the same. You keep out of this. Okay. Well, you do what you like, Uncle Mort. But there's no reason for you to stay with Birdie here. I'll take care of that. Birdie! That's the old fight, Anki. You coming, excuse me? Birdie, why don't you take the evening off? Oh, Birdie can't take this evening off. Mrs. Marge and Mr. Bronco's going out. And I've got to stay with the twins. Well, that's the point, Birdie. You don't have to stay. I'm going to be here. Yeah, me too. Mr. Gill, so, you mean you're going babysit? You, of course, Birdie. Have you ever babysat? Certainly. I've been around all kinds of babies. I don't know why everyone makes such a big hullabaloo about mining a couple of babies. Well, if you want me to go, Mr. Gill, I'll go if you sure you want me to go. Yeah, absolutely, Birdie. I'll stay if you want me to stay. No, you go ahead, Birdie. I'll either go or stay. Well, you go. I'll go or stay. Look, go. I mean go. Go or stay. Yo, Birdie, go, please. All right, what you say, go. I'll go. Well, at last. What else for a whole evening? You know, they're not toys, my boy. I'm only doing this as a matter of principle. I'm going to prove to a few people around here they're making a mountain out of a molehill. Of course, we may get a chance to look at the little tykes. Yeah, without somebody saying, go wash your hands. You, by the way, let's see your hands. They're clean. Go wash them with soap. Go for corn shake. Well, we're ready to go, Anki. Going with us, Mr. Gillerslee? But you might give Birdie a lift. She's going downtown. Birdie? Yeah, I told her to take the evening off. I'll be the babysitter this evening. On second thought, Marge, maybe we should stay home. Oop, Bronco. I really don't care about seeing the movie, Bronco. Why don't you go and I'll stay here? No, wait a minute. You go to the movie, Marge. I'll stay here with Mr. Gillerslee. A babysitter for the babysitter. I'd much rather that you'd go, Bronco. Why does anybody have to go? This is ridiculous. I've never seen such a pair of worry birds. Somebody call Birdie? Were you going out tonight, Birdie? Well, that's what Mr. Gillerslee says. He says, Birdie, you go out, so I'm going. Well, you go right ahead, Birdie. I'm going to be here. Come again? Your Marjorie isn't going to be here, Birdie. She's going to the movies with Bronco. She is, huh? No, she isn't, Birdie. I'm going to be here and Marge is going. Children, please. Well, I won't have you and Miss Marge Listen to me. You're taking the evening off, Birdie. I'd rather stay home, really. I don't mind staying. Listen to me. Listen! Yes? Are you listening? We're listening. Nobody is staying home except me. The babies are going to be all right. Now forget all this silliness and go to your movies and wherever you're going. There's a lot of nonsense. Maybe Mr. Gillerslee is right. Of course I'm right. These are not the first babies in the world, you know. There have been a few others. Don't probably sleep until we get back anyway. Sure. Come on, Marge. We won't be late, auntie. If you need us, we'll be at the Palace Theater. In the balcony. Goodbye, auntie. Goodbye, kitties. Have a good time. Well, Birdie? Don't look at me. I'm going. I've got... Good, Gillerslee. When you put your foot down, this family jumps. I've been gone, aunt. Yeah, they're gone. I was listening upstairs. What a battle. Well, I simply decided that you and I were going to take care of the babies tonight and that was that. Yeah. Just think we got the twins all to ourselves. Yes, sir. What do we do with them? We're not going to do anything with them. They're asleep. Let's wake them up. Here's an important announcement. Ford Victorious. Glamorous new 1951. Ford Victorious. Yes, Ford Victorious. Most beautiful Ford cars ever built are waiting for owners. Twenty of these streamlined new models are being won in Parquet Margarine's great $83,500 contest series. Yes, and 1,150 other prizes as well. Just listen to these prices. Each week, for five weeks, Parquet is awarding four beautiful new Ford Victorious. Ten General Electric portable dishwashers. Twenty General Electric triple whip mixers. 100 crisp new $20 bills. 100 crisp new $10 bills. Here's how you enter. Think of names for Bronco and Margie's twins. One's a boy, one's a girl, remember. Get an entry blank from your grocer. It will tell you how prize-winning entries are selected or use plain paper. Send your names for the twins plus your own name and address to Parquet Margarine, box 6799, Chicago 77, Illinois. With each entry, enclose the red end flap from a package of Parquet Margarine. And remember, Ford Victoria winners whose entries are accompanied by two red end flaps instead of one are entitled to a special $500 cash bonus in addition to their first prize. One red end flap entitles your entry to full consideration for any prize. Two entitles you to an extra $500 if your entry wins one of the four weekly first prizes. Remember the address, Parquet Margarine, box 6799, Chicago 77, Illinois. This week's contest, the third of five weekly contests ends at midnight Saturday. So hurry, name the twins. Get your entry off tomorrow. Remember, there are two more weekly contests to follow after this one. So enter now, enter often. Don't forget, names of first week's winners will be announced in a few minutes. Well, it took a little doing but the great gilded sleeve finally got his wish. He shewed Margarine Bronco and Bertie out of the house and now for the first time the water commissioner and his nephew Leroy are babysitting with the twins. They've been at it about an hour so far and the score no hits, no runs, no errors. See, this is getting dull, Anke. When do we start having some fun with the twins? Yeah, me patiently, Leroy. I'm not staying with the babies tonight for fun. I am. Howdy, what's the use of babysitting if you just got a sit? Well, it is pretty quiet. I thought there'd be a little more activity. A couple of healthy youngsters like those. I think they'd stir around a little more. Maybe if we nudged them a little. No nudging. Yeah, but maybe they're hungry. It's a pretty trick not to wake them up if they're hungry. Let's feed them. Yeah, Leroy, Margarine said we could feed them when they wake up. Yeah, but time's going by. Pretty soon everybody will be coming home and we'll be out of luck. That would be a disappointment, all right. They slept right through. How do we know, Anke? Maybe they're awake right now. Maybe it's so quiet they think they're still asleep. Yeah, I doubt that, my boy. Gee, Anke, we haven't got much time. If just a little noise won't come up, that'd mean that we're getting ready to wake up anyway, wouldn't it? Well, it might. If we were just talking like this and that won't come up, that'd be all right, wouldn't it? Yeah, I don't think it's necessary to shout Leroy. We can simply use a moderate tone of voice. They must have the blankets over their ears. No, Leroy, stop worrying. If they're going to wake up, they'll wake. They must have just been opening their little eyes. I'll get the bottles. No, Leroy, don't get pushy. I'll take care of the bottles. Okay, I'll go in and talk to them. Wait, we'll both go in. Then we'll take the baskets into the kitchen. Babies like to watch the bottles being fixed. See, that's the little girl. What a voice. She's going to be an opera singer. That or a hog collar. There goes the boy. She woke him up. Come on, Leroy. Take a basket. Head for the kitchen. What a racket. Put it down someplace. Not in the stove. Pull the chair out of the breakfast now. I got no hands. Well, pull it out with your feet. I'm standing on them. Here, here, here. With the basket. Yeah, not this chair. Yeah, I'll put mine over here. Okay. Uh-oh, he's clogged up again. Yours is just lying there. The one that hollers. Well, do something to amuse it. I'm getting the bottles ready. What do I do? Go kitschy kitschy koo waggy. Kitschy kitschy koo? Sure. Babies like that. I can't do that. Go ahead. Get the milk out of the refrigerator and put it on the stove. What you cooking it for? I'm not cooking it. You want more milk for babies? No kidding. Yeah, dinner's coming, kiddies. Look at that little face. Watching every move I make. He doesn't trust you. He does too. He knows his friends, don't you? Good. Milk's getting hot. Better put it in the bottles. See, that looks good. Can I have some? Leroy, this is for babies. Okay. You feed that one and I'll feed this one. Boy, this is keen. We know how to take care of kids, don't we? Yeah. Here you are, you little bear. You put it in your mouth. What's the matter? Maybe the milk's too hot. You think so? Don't taste it. Shake some out of the back of your hand. Like this. You're all over my trousers. I shook some out of this, not. Something's wrong. What are you doing to that baby? What's the matter with him? How should I know? Come on, baby. Nice milk. Whole bottle. Oh, my goodness. What do we do now? Put them back in the baskets. Keep an eye on them, Leroy. Don't leave me alone. Stop shouting, Leroy. You better close the door. Good old Phoebe. You'll be able to help me. Shoot her. Phoebe's pharmacy? Oh, Phoebe? Mrs. Gildersleeve. Oh, no, Mr. Gildersleeve. What can I do for you this evening? Phoebe, I need some advice. Quick, I'm taking care of Marjorie's twins and they're raising the roof. What'll I do? Well, I don't know much about babies, Mr. Gildersleeve. Mrs. Phoebe and I never had any of our own. Well, I know that, but you're a pharmacist, Phoebe. What do you give babies when they cry? Well, what do they want? Well, I know what they want. They're just yelling. Have you tried milk? Yes, I've tried milk. They cry all the louder. Well, how about this little pig went to market? Babies like that. What are you talking about, Phoebe? You know, this little pig went to market. This little pig stayed home. It's a game. You'll play it with their toes. I haven't time to play games with their toes. Well, there's always patty cake. Patty cake? You'll play that with their hands. Phoebe, you get some of the silliest ideas. Yeah, well, I'm not trying to take care of two babies. Oh, yeah. Oh, my goodness. Can't you suggest anything, Phoebe? Mr. Gildersleeve, this is a drugstore, not a day nursery. Fine drugstore. Phoebe, you're no more a druggist than I am. Well, I wouldn't say that. No. See you later, Phoebe. Fine things. Marjorie and Brant will walk out and leave me with the babies. Run off to the movies. Irresponsible kids. Leave me with no instructions. Two babies on my hands. I just... See? Be quiet. Maybe they're going to sleep again. Leeroy. Quiet, Uncle, dozing. Save by a miracle. Marjorie and Brant will come home and find the babies crying. I'd never leave it down. Oops, darn doorbell. Oh! Both away again. Who's in that compounded door? Good evening, Gilder. Well, your happy home seems to be ringing with the voices of little children. I ought to ring something right off your head, you old goat. What's wrong, Gilder? Tell me in the house, Judge. You just had the babies asleep and you had to lean on that doorbell. Oh, I'm so sorry, Gilder. They seem to be quiet now. They... They are. Don't breathe. Where are they, Gilder? In the kitchen. Come on. You'll make a sound. You're making all the noise. Quiet, Judge. Oh, there they are. Just as quiet as they can be. They'll make a sound. Anybody. I'm bushed. You see, Gilder? The little darlings knew I was coming and they're on their good behavior. Look out, Judge. Don't lean against that cupboard door. Your pants in there. Judge! Judge, now you've done it. You stay here. We'll have no rats leaving this sinking ship. They're hurting my ears. Give them a bottle, Gilder. Oh, my goodness. Back door. Here comes Bronco and Mandrie. Well, I think I'll go out the front door. You stay here. Oh, it's Bertie. Oh, am I glad to see you. What's the matter with the little darlings? They've been crying long. Shall we tell her? There's something seriously wrong, Bertie. I've done everything right. Got the milk out of the refrigerator, warmed it, put it in the bottles, but they won't take it. Is this the milk you gave them? That's it. That's not a milk. Yeah, but they would be buttermilk. Oh, brother! Never mind. What are we going to do, Bertie? What are we going to do? We have to get them quiet before Bronco and Mandrie come home. Well, let me take a Mr. Gilder sleep. Knock here, Bertie. Now go on to sleep. Night is drawn to bed without a tea. Bless you, Bertie. Anything Mr. Gilder sleep? Fine. Everything's just fine. How are the babies? They're in bed. Did they give you any trouble? Trouble? There was nothing to worry about? Yeah, I guess you're right. They're pretty good babies. Yeah, as Bertie says. Just perfect, dangerous. Right back. Now, here they are. The first week's winners in Parquet, Margarine's $83,500 Name the Twins contest. For entries postmarked before midnight, March 17th, Glamorous new Ford Victoria's go-to. Mrs. Sanders Harris, Fort Valley, Georgia, who is also a bonus winner, E.H. Davis, Rockford, Illinois, Mrs. Ray Pease, Atkinson, Nebraska, Mrs. Violet McElven, Houston, Texas. Winners of other prizes will be notified by mail. You have until midnight this Saturday to get in your entries in the third week's Parquet, Margarine contest. Your entry must include your names for the Twins, your own and your grocer's name and address, and the red enflap from a package of Parquet, Margarine. Two red enflaps if you want to try for a $500 bonus as well as a first prize. Send entries to Parquet, Margarine, Box 6799, Chicago 77, Illinois. Hurry! Your names for the Twins may win you a brand-new Ford Victoria. Gentlemen, this is a rather proud moment for all of us who gather here each week to help bring you the great Gildesley programs. As you know, April 1st marks the beginning of Invest in America Week. And tonight, we are honored to have as our guest the chairman of the Invest in America Week Executive Committee, Mr. W.G. Paul. Thank you. On behalf of the Invest in America Week movement, I am happy to make this presentation. The Invest in America Week Executive Committee takes great pleasure in citing the Kraft Foods Company and the National Broadcasting Company for presenting Willard Waterman, whose intelligent and understanding portrayal of the great Gildersleeve has contributed immeasurably to the public understanding of the role of the individual in building America at the community level. Most sincere thanks to you, Mr. Paul, and to all your committee. I speak for all the Gildersleeve family. What a fine fellow. Good night, folks. This piece is played by W.Waterman, the show is written by Paul West, John Elliott, and Manning White. It was used by Robert Armbruster. Included in the cast are Walter Tetley, Mary Lee Robb, Lillian Randolph, Dick Prenner, Earl Ross, and Dick Legrand. This is John Easton saying good night for the Kraft Foods Company, makers of parking margarine and those other famous Kraft quality foods. Be sure to listen in next Wednesday and every Wednesday for the further adventures of the great Gildersleeve. What's the difference between a sandwich that's really super and one that's merely good? Here's the answer. Kraft's prepared mustard. When you add a little mustard to cold meats or cheese, you add a lot of tang. Hidden flavors pop right out. That's better. There are two kinds of Kraft mustard, you know. Kraft's salad mustard, mild and delicately spiced, and Kraft mustard with snappy horseradish added. Have both on hand for different tastes, different uses. With either kind, when you add a little mustard, you add a lot of tang. Get Kraft's prepared mustard. Hear the Falcon every Sunday over the station. Check your newspaper for time of broadcast and listen next Sunday as it allows the case of the worried wife. Listen for Irrepressible Groucho Marx on NBC.