 What's something you hated hearing as a kid? We'll go first. You'll understand when you're older This is a phrase that hasn't furiated kids for decades. Many psychologists, like Eric Erickson, for example, have taught us that we develop in stages. As children, our brains haven't developed enough to handle the complex situations that we'll encounter as adults. Thus, birthed the dreaded phrase. Now, there are adults that act like children. We're usually able to call them immature, but what do you call someone that doesn't understand or cope well with those heavier topics consistently? That's what we would call emotionally immature. Let's explore four signs someone might be emotionally immature. Impulsivity. In the OG and remake of Willy Wonka, we meet for Ruka Salt. In both versions, she's a rich, demanding, and impulsive brat ordering daddy around. I want this and I'll get this. Ah, common razors you hear from a child like Ruka. Now, what if you have an adult that acts just as impulsively and does whatever they want? According to Lindsay Gibson, a psychiatrist and author of Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, people who are emotionally immature are also incapable of thinking deeply and analyzing the situation thoroughly. So, their decisions are usually emotionally charged rather than well thought out, just like Ruka. In the OG, she wants a golden goose. In the remake, it's squirrels. Either way, she isn't taking into consideration that these are Wonka employees or how much her daddy will need to spend to buy an employee. Not to mention how awfully similar to slavery this sounds. This inability to analyze a situation fully can be a sign of emotional immaturity. Sometimes, life can seem like you're playing a game of who stole the cookie from the cookie jar. When people need to be accountable for their actions, it can seem like everyone is passing the buck. In 2016, a study was done on better emotional intelligence in adolescents. The researchers stated an emotionally mature person is able to reflect on their thoughts and actions in order to determine if they did the right thing. This is called emotional regulation. Those who are emotionally immature typically don't get to this stage of thought, nor the personal growth that comes with it. They like the fact that the attention is on them, but not have something they did wrong as being called to attention. This is where the immature and emotionally charged response comes. This response and the lack of self-reflection can help determine someone's emotional maturity. Bullying. When children fat, they usually resort to bullying and name-calling to protect their feelings. People who are emotionally immature might also act the same way. According to a study on adolescent bullying by Epsurisa Ramirez, bullying is that same emotionally charged initial reaction that we've been talking about. Since emotionally immature adults still lack the tools to cope with difficult emotions, they might resort to playground tactics like bullying. An example of this, might be an employee making fun of the boss's outfit while getting reprimanded. This emotionally immature response prevents the self-reflection we mentioned earlier, and is used as a coping mechanism to help protect the person from feeling like they're in the wrong. Selective caring. As we grow up, there actually is a stage of child development where kids are actually supposed to be a bit narcissistic. According to our buddy Ericsson, this is around when the child is three to four years old. Now, a little looking out for number one doesn't make you a bad person. However, being an adult and only caring about how your actions impact you, can be a sign of emotional immaturity according to Tracy S. Hutchinson PhD from Psychology Today. Let's say your friend just lost their job and can't pay rent. They confide in you to let some stress off by venting. If you're an emotionally mature friend, you might be able to comfort them and help brainstorm some solutions to help get them on their feet again. If you're emotionally immature, you might smile and nod while your friend vents, but you might not even be paying attention since their situation doesn't affect you. Now, there can be a lot of reasons for someone to act a bit self-absorbed. This is just one of those reasons. Do you know any more? Share them below, and you might see them in an upcoming video. Dealing with an emotionally immature adult can be difficult and outright frustrating, especially if you're a grown-up yourself. Remember, their actions, or reactions, aren't a reflection of you. They're a reflection of the thoughts and feelings they're unable to express in a healthy way. Do you know any other signs of emotional immaturity? Let us know down below. As always, keep an eye on Cy for more Psych2Go content. Until next time!