 Myth number 10 love is unconditional. This is a big one First to love is to value in general the most general sense possible. That's what that means To value something is to judge something to be of value by definition To love anyone is to love them on the condition that they are who they are and that they do not become someone you disvalue They do not become a monster over time someone you Want nothing to do it which they certainly can change into an extreme example would be that Hitler's immediate family was not unconditionally obligated to continue to love him When he started slaughtering people If anyone in your immediate family became a rapist Someone that's physically or sexually assaulted people or a murderer you would not in any way And that was the same would be true for anything any kind of friendship or relationship. That's just complete nonsense They have broken the condition that they are who they are. They are not Someone who's a murderer someone who's a killer someone who you want nothing to do with and it doesn't have to be that extreme though The person you love family friend intimate partner Fundamentally changes who they are for the worse. You are absolutely not required to continue loving them They have broken the condition if they have So what I mean when I say fundamentally is that they don't just change superficially They don't get sick and gain like a little bit of weight and then you're like, oh fuck that There that condition broke chain thin anymore for like just this next few weeks. I mean fundamentally Couple years ago Jason Savage He introduced the concept to me that was profound that in a way. I was aware of but not explicitly or consciously He told me that the pursuit of health is a sign or expression of self-esteem so What's important here is having self-esteem or having fundamental values that are important to you a woman or an intimate partner so Again with with just physical appearances if that changes is temporarily That's not that important. What's more important is that she has a pursuit of health that she is a happy person That you like to be around that you enjoy Not the day-to-day small things that can change for better or worse very quickly It's the fundamentals that matter You just rip off DJ Fuji so Those are the ten myths. That's a crash course in this book and in romantic love Some further reading beyond the book, which is just a psychology of romantic love. You can get it on Amazon Barnes and Noble so on Would be a follow-up book this one that is not very well known, but it's really really good It's hard to find but you should be able to get on the internet And that's a romantic love question-answer book. It's a direct follow-up to the book came out three years later. I want to say It's just as long and it's just a Q&A, but it's really really good and he does it with his wife at the time Another book from him is this is my second favorite book from him right after psychology romantic love It's called the art of living consciously the power of awareness to transform everyday life This is fantastic in general, but in specific as well I believe for romantic love as far as being conscious in your daily life and Bringing just like he says five to ten percent more consciousness and awareness Three interactions to your endeavors to your pursuits in life It's really really good And I mentioned this in specific because he is known as the father of self-esteem So he has like a whole list of books on self-esteem that are really really good But that's what he's mostly known for and books like psychology romantic love and this book they kind of get brushed to the side They're of secondary importance behind self-esteem books from him So I would say first look at these because I think these Not saying anything about the self-esteem books. They're great, but these are harder to find and they're not as they're not quite as Popular or discussed as often You can also check out the author's website at his name. So it's Nathaniel Brandon calm He has an entire section on romantic love that I think is really really good. It has books articles Excuse me and Audios from speeches like this. He gave back in like the 80s. They're great. They're cost a couple of bucks There's MP3's and they're really really good. I would highly recommend them. They're absolutely worth like 995 whatever charges form and that's it. That's my presentation on the psychology of romantic love a Brief introduction to it. I hope you guys have enjoyed it and if you have any questions, I'll be happy to take them. Thanks guys Questions for Anthony Johnson He actually I should have mentioned that There's actually entire section in the book. He starts off. It's actually It's really good, but it's not as good as the rest of the book the beginning of psychology romantic love He goes into history So it's like maybe 30 40 pages on the history of romantic love How it's developed throughout the ages and different cultures and religions and so on and how it's been treated So the book answers that really really well I would say I'm not even sure if this is his exact inclusion, but mine is that it most has to do with religions religions have wanted to control sex for hundreds or thousands of years That's why it's such a big issue or That's kind of Self-fulfilling prophecy there. I think that sex is such a It's such a profound celebration of your life and of happiness on this earth as something that people want to control So to control that they create things And I'm not bashing marriage here, but they create things like marriage. They and then they create certain rules for it and such That sex for example sex outside of marriage is evil. You're gonna go to hell You're gonna burn for eternity from this God who also loves you or something so it's things like that they create and it's It's not like some big conspiracy, but it's a system of a system of control So they make it and it's it's easier to control people Do you get people fearful of you to have them do what you want and to I guess make them obedient Which the guys in here? I don't think any of you are very obedient. So power to you. Fuck. I ain't Does that answer your question? I think it's most it mostly comes down to religion It's not even there are a lot of traditional cultural things too, but most of it. I think with some from religions Does anyone else have a question? No, yeah Okay That guy we go. Oh, actually All of a sudden zero to like three. Yeah How does the psychology of romantic love impacts offspring and Children Not an obligation If you oh, yeah, if you get into it liability more likely Yeah, I think that was for example bigger when I was a child and it's gone away a little bit But you're right. It's still around