 on Coop Dog Rainbow because there's something that's associated with the rainbow. In fact, the whole organization is called Rainbow 8808 and we're going to hone in because this rainbow is exactly what it is. It's a whole spectrum of issues that this beautiful lady has brought to the table and has put 100% effort to help in the society here. But we're going to hone in on some more specific parts of that rainbow today. So let me, without further ado, introduce our wonderful guest today who is just a colorful lady in herself, Caroline Goliou. Correct. Beautifully said. A lot of people just don't know. It's J-U-C-H. You said it's a Polish? It's a Polish name. My husband is 100% Polish. Wow. Okay. So bringing more diversity to Hawaii as a guide and you yourself, just give us a little background info. Okay, Native American. I am Hispanic and I'm Irish. 2% African American. What? Yes. Okay. So you're tracing back from Ancestry.com. Yes. And what do you think you are, though? What is the essence of what do you identify the most with? I think I'm an international spirit. Absolutely. Yeah. And thus the rainbow colors, yeah? That's it. That really goes. Now before I forget, you had this button on and unfortunately we had to take it off because of the green in it, but it was a little rainbow sign. And can you just tell us what your button says? Because you said it's part of your uniform. Why? Yes. Well, it says I love, I heart my gay son. And that was an awakening in my life. And since he came out to our family, it's been a whole new world. He's opened up a whole new world to us. Things that I was seeing, but I always said, well, they don't bother me and I won't bother them. And then when my son came out, then I realized there's much more to it than that. You can't just see discrimination and walk away from it, especially when it's in your family. And you can't deny it and yet I know many do. So my badge, sometimes I think of it as a badge of courage. But really in reality, all it is is an opening spot. It's welcoming others to talk to me. It opens them up. They know that I'm a safe person to talk to. Was this the inspiration to you creating this Rainbow 88? And by the way, you should maybe tell our viewers what this all encompasses before we hone in on some specifications. Well, we're a 501C, which makes us a nonprofit. And we focus on the whole family, whether it's a one-person family or a multi-person family. And so we do try to support, love, and inform those. And so the supporting is the big, big role that we have. And what are the type of families that you tend to focus on who need more support? Okay. Families that have any problems if it's just relating to each other, because we can go down that route through my master's and social work. I have been a therapist and I can talk to you one on one about what it means to be the mother of a gay son, a lesbian daughter, although I don't have a lesbian daughter, but any of the alphabet, the LGBT community, you know. Actually, I want to remind everyone that the reason I met you is because it was at the Woman's March a few weeks ago. And Carolyn here was at a booth, right outside where everybody was congregating. And you had all these sanitary napkins piled up along with some canned food or something. Ben and hygiene products. Right. And so that was an aspect we hadn't thought of before. And because we, on a weekly basis, 52 weeks out of the year, supply a week's worth of fresh fruits and vegetables and milk and dairy products. Yogurt and... Two homeless people or two people's shelters? No, no, no. Two yo, which is youth outreach. Okay. They've been in Waikiki for 25 years. Great. And so we helped them along. When we asked them how can we support you, they said, we can't fill up the youth after always hungry. And that clicked something in me, because my mother said, in this country, no one should ever go hungry. And she said that, and I said, that's what we can do. And so we started out with just canned foods. And it was killing me as a mother thinking I can't survive on canned foods. And so I said, don't they like vegetables and fruits and dairy? And she said, yes. But the food bank has no refrigeration, so we can't get them. And I said, then that's our niche. And from then on. And we've been doing it since November of 2013. Right. Well, that's wonderful. But in addition to that, again, the image of the sanitary napkins on the table, too, just reminded me that there are certain issues as being a woman where people don't talk about that you need to deal with. That's right. And if you're homeless or if you're from some, I don't know, you could be on the streets, you could be in a battered home, you could be in a happy family, but sometimes those little things. That's right. And some of the women that came up that day, it was such a wonderful experience. One of them said to me, you know, I often wondered what happened when to a person who is on the streets, living on the streets, and they get their period. Where do they go? What do they do if they don't have money for housing? Then where does this come from? And I said, well, yo does what it can, but this is our effort in helping them. And so when we turned over, I called it my three bags full. We had so many. We had over 400, almost $500 worth of pads and tampons. They even gave me some shampoo. They gave me, you know, they just brought and it was wonderful. They come with their bags, you know, or it was in their backpack and they'd take it off and they'd start shoving it in, you know, on the table. Right. And who were the people who do receive these products? They are the participants, the youth. Right. The youth at Yo. Okay. So can we talk a little bit about that? Oh, yes. You know, when you think about teens or any kind of youths, you assume that they're just going to be disciplined under house until they get old enough and then they get kicked out or whatever. And then they figure out things sometimes. But many are unfortunate to have that. That's right. And they're out there on their own for some whatever reason too early without enough support, physically, emotionally, spiritually, financially, so many things. That's right. And when we started, I had a problem with getting donations because people's reaction was, oh, they're just problem children. They don't like to follow rules and they're misfit. And I said, no, do you know a statistic show that runaways are running from something, either abuse in the home, and that could be verbal, sexual, physical abuse, or it could be that the parents throw them out. Oh gosh. And I've talked to some youth who have said, well, the other thing, we have a rainbow and everyone can connect set with the LGBT community. But remember before we started talking LGBT, Hawaii was the rainbow state. Every time you saw a rainbow, it was connected to us. And it still is. The rainbow warriors, right? They, you know, rah, rah, rah. And there's your logo. And there's our logo, and the rainbow cameras. And I love our logo because our logo shows that rainbows don't discriminate. Regardless of age or sexual orientation or preference or identity. So how many in these youth problematic groups in Hawaii include LGBT members who are struggling with multiple issues? Multiple issues. Well, they say 40% of any runway population is LGBT. And yet the LGBT community is only supposed to comprise of 5 to 10% of our community. I don't believe that though. So see, see, but they are more likely to be thrown out than another. Or do you think they are forced out? Like they will choose to leave because it's just so much pressure and lack of support at home. That's right. So either way. One young woman told me, she said, well, once I told my father that I was a lesbian, he said no daughter of mine will be that. He said all my daughters are going to have grandchildren for me. So guess what? She went out, she got herself pregnant and he still kicked her out. And so she lived on the street for many years, you know. And I met the little girl. She was adorable. And I have a daughter of the, yes. She's a homeless with her daughter. She was. She was. She now has found a placement, but she was living on the streets. And if that doesn't tear your heart out, I don't know what what else. Exactly. You know, so this brings out so many issues, you know, this can of worms of why these poor innocent youths are out in the streets and we back up into parents and their interpretations of life, which bind them to certain expectations. That's right. So how do we go about, you know, backtracking and educating people or opening up people's views of acceptance? Well, that's the hard nut to crack. Because first of all, nobody wants to talk about. Yes. And I would like to have people start opening their eyes up. When they go to a family party, when they go, because our families here in Hawaii are, you know, a hodge podge of everybody. Sure. You know, as long as you know, that's right. And you go and all of a sudden you don't see a particular person. All of a sudden a member of the either host family or a member of some of the visitors who you've seen year after year and all of a sudden this person is just missing and they don't talk about them. Oh. Ask about them. Ask about them. I miss, I miss seeing your son, your daughter, whatever, or I miss, remember a character of them that brought, drew you to them. Why aren't they here? Where are they? So there's a lot of shame and embarrassment from the older generation who feel they cannot confront these issues, which actually destroys the family. And I have a hard time with people who have a house over their head, who have food on the table and clothes and all the things that are necessary in our daily life. And they don't understand the person that doesn't have it. Um, in my community we also have, it's not helping hands, but it's a safety watch in a neighborhood watch program. And I was there, one of my first times that I went, we go on Monday nights once a month, every two months, something like that. And we walked through our townhouse association. And as I walked up and said alone and was talking to people, they started talking about, we have to be careful. You know, right then was right after, um, Aloha, the airline. See, I've forgotten what the airline was. They just one day in April, just closed up shop and all of their people were out. And it was right after that. And they started talking about, we have to watch our neighborhood because, you know, we're going to have a lot of homeless up here. And so I wanted to strangle them, but I didn't. So I just interjected. I said, Oh, do any of you have any friends, cousins, aunties or uncles that are out of work because the airline went belly up. And they sort of looked at me and I said, Think of them. They are our brothers and sisters too. See, and so that awareness has to be there. And sometimes I just want to, you know, shake them, shake them up and say, about us. It's not about something else. You know, this is a huge topic and just telling me the case study, not even the case study, but a personal, your late, the girl who was kicked out of her house, it just tears my heart apart too. So we're going to take a quick break and we'll come back and we'll continue talking about and opening up our eyes and hearts to what's going on and why we are so apathetic to homeless and sisters of the youth. So don't go away. Very important stuff to talk about. Hello. Thank you for watching Think Tech, Planet of the Courageous. I'm Dr. Dean Nelson, host of Planet of the Courageous. In Tibetan mythology, it's said that you pick this planet to learn something. You picked your birth on this planet to learn something. This planet is spinning and hurling through space at 67,000 miles per hour. And it takes courage to not slip into fear and collapse into anxiety. One can find so many justifications for selfishness and prejudice. But we have two ears to listen to one another and one heart that can provide a common ground. But this takes courage to stay in that space. We've chosen the right planet for the opportunity to learn, courage, and try to solve so many challenges. Aloha. Thank you for watching. Looking to energize your Friday afternoon? Tune in to Stand the Energy Man at 12 noon. Aloha Friday here on Think Tech Hoy. On behalf of Rainbow 808, it's just opened up this world that we prefer to just say it has nothing to do with my life. I know there are lots of homeless in Hawaii and so blah, blah, blah. But it's just, Caroline, please awaken us about the situation. And we all know that homeless is a huge problem here. But, you know, when it comes to the youth and why they're kicked out or why they left the house and consequences of them being on the street and so on and so forth, especially girls, can we talk a little bit more about that and some situations you've seen that we need to know? And this was before I ever started Rainbow Family 808. It was several years ago our daughter, I have two children, a daughter and an adult, both of my children are adults, and my daughter had her own apartment and I was given a call. I took a call from a friend on the big island who said, Caroline, please help this young man. He moved, he had a job on the big island but his mother encouraged him to come home. And so he did. While he was home, he found out, his mother found out he was gay. And she said, I have to throw you out. You can't, you are a danger to my daughters. Now, this, you know, let's go back to basics, biology one-on-one, folks. Anything, girlfriend, you're the safest. That's right, yes. You know, and she said, she said he's now living on the street and we're worried he's going to get into drugs and into prostitution. And we're, I'm just worried about him. What does a young man at 17 do on the street? And I said, so I talked to my daughter. I called some churches and they said, well, give us some information and we'll put it in our bulletin next week. I said, no, no, that's not. I can't do that next week. I want him off the street now, now, before someone encourages him or pimps him or whatever. And so I asked my daughter, you have this, this apartment, she was subletting one room. So she, you know, the prices of, and it wasn't a fancy apartment, but it was a three bedroom. And I said, you're already running it out to one young man. Could you take him, this, this one young 17 year old, right? I said, I will help him get a job. We will pay his first month's rent with you. We'll pay for two months rent with you. We bought him clothes and food and, and sheets and vandals and everything. And we moved him in because I don't know what he would have done. But I put myself, how would I have felt if my parents had thrown me out? Of course. You know, I would go, where do I go? What do I do? You know, and if you were the one on the street, how would you feel if someone did bring you in and say, hey, it's okay. You can stay here. Get your work. You'll be all right. That's right. And how does that change a person? Yes. You know, and the sad part about it is he was such a go-getter that he had, once he had moved back to Oahu, he'd already gotten himself a part-time job. But she went to his place of employment and started yelling at his boss saying, how can you have this gay, my gay son working for you? Well, the people who had been buying things, had them in their hands, went and put them down and walked out. And so finally the owner or the manager was able to get the mother out of the, out of the store. But then he told the young man, he said, I have no guarantee that your mother's not going to do this again. Right. And he said, I don't know how much I just lost in all those sales because no one wanted to be around the conflict. Exactly. And nobody wants to be involved with anything with any risk. That's right. At any risk. And they don't even, you know. Does it shock you to today that there's so much, just, I don't think narrow-mindedness is even the word for it. It's so far beyond that. That people are continuing this type of concept and lack of embracing of diversity, which we've kind of brought up to have. Isn't it? Is it shocking or is it something we're missing here? I wanted to continue to be shocking because every time I just take it for granted, then I become part of the problem. And so there's that, you know, oh, I've heard this before. Oh my, you know. Have you tried to talk to the parents who have shunned their kids because of their lack of acceptance, whether it's because of LGBT issues or whatever? Well, I had, years ago when we, we had a support group once a month. I did that for almost 18 years. But that was for the LGBT community. Right. You know, and, and I did talk to those. One mother had said that the only reason she was at the support group meeting was because her son said, you either go to the support group meeting or you'll never see me again. Wow. And that was quite, but that was the only way. Did it work though? Did she change your concept? She spent most of her time at our meetings crying. She would come with a scripture verse and say, she's blaming it on. Yeah. Well, she'd say, how can I resolve this knowing that this is in the Bible? And so luckily we had several people that were, well, my husband and I have put on Bible studies back in Europe. And so we knew how to answer, but we like to have it come from everyone rather than just whoever is holding the, the support group. And so we had a lot of people that would say, oh, and then they would, they would counter her, her, her, her Bible study with, you know, with something else and say, well, what about that? How can you? Part of me says, if it's your child, and if you bore that child for nine months and you know them, and that's one of the things that brought me when my son came out was that. How old was he when he came out? 22. But you sensed it when he was growing up as an adolescent? No. Not at all? No. It just kind of, did he talk to you or you just have caught him or what? It was right before he finished college. And right after dad, it signed on the bottom line with all the, paid all the bills. Oh, I see, a clever boy. But he has very, very, very, very smart. And then he came out to us. And see, at that time, which is the best time to come out is when you're safe, you know that you have something to run to, you have some means of escaping. And it just tore my... But you can't control that. A lot of kids are struggling with their sexuality when they're 12 or even earlier. And it's earlier now. 22 is old for today's age. Do you know in high schools now, even in Hawaii, interviewed some lady, she said her teenage daughter had a handful, a handful of friends who are going through sexual operations in teenagers. In teenagers. And it's not just the concept, it's just the actual operation. That's right. And see, that's how far we moved on some aspects. But we haven't moved all the way. So, yeah. The question is, how do we get parents who are struggling to accept their child for whatever reasons? How do we get them to accept their children? You just said, you know, you bear them for nine months, you think it'd be a natural thing, but... Well, there's the other side to that. That till the age of 18 to 21, they are financially responsible for them. And so, my idea, when I'm really having a bad day, is I want to arrest them all and slap them with a charge and make them pay. If they can't get along. See, this world is so diverse now and we have so many avenues for help. There is all kinds. If you're having problems and your child is too belligerent, then get a counselor. What's at the bottom of that? Don't just smack them around or throw them out because you are now unencourageable or... And you're destroying yourself. You are hurting and just bleeding inside. Well, I'm glad you can see their part because all I see is the pain of a kid. No, because it's both ways. Because once a parent, always a parent, right? That's right. Even when your drug addict, gay son at 50, gets into jail and you have to bail them out for the 20th time, it's still your kid. That's right. But there's also a tough love program for that. Yes. Go back to how we can help these youths who are on the streets or how do we even kind of move forward with this? Okay. Well, first of all, it's personal. You have to really feel the need. If you don't have that situation in your home, if everything is... Someone called our family, the... What is it? Leave it to be your family. Which is absolutely not true. But you have to have that heart. You can't have a child. And the thing is, though, we know there are children born to parents that have no mothering skills, have no nurturing skills, because the father is just as liable for this. And it's a vicious cycle because they will end up having kids who might be doing the same thing. And so they may not have grown up in the home that I always counter that right away with, wait a second, I wouldn't want that to happen to me. And so it's just... I'm in this turmoil all the time trying to feel for the parent, but looking because the parent has money, they have avenues, they have a roof over their heads. When it rains, I have a real problem because I know the kids are out in the street. And the thing is, remember, if 40% of all runaways are LGBT, that means 60% are straight. And so that was one of... That isn't one of the... Yeah, it was one of the things, yo, you've outreach in Waikiki taught me. Because when I first went to them, I was known more for an advocate for the LGBT community. And they said to me, well, you know, we would really welcome your help, but you know that we can't isolate whatever you give us just to deal. And I said, oh, never, never, never, never. Not with this, not with our group, because we're... We don't discriminate. And that's going back to the rainbow idea. You encompass every aspect of the spectrum. That's it. You've got it. You've got it. So inclusive that it doesn't matter where you come from. How do people reach you? And how do youths who really feel or you have friends and family who think they need? How do they come and approach you? They can call me at 808-779-9078. They can email me at rainbowfamily808atgmail.com. Go on our website. It's rainbowfamily808.com. See what we're doing. Today, I'm going to change clothes, jump into my comfortable clothes, and we're putting on a Valentine's barbecue for the kids. Oh, wonderful. So we're doing hamburgers and hot dogs. I made potato salad, and I just hope it's okay. It's all good. It's all good. And chips and soda. And we're going to have them make their own ice cream. And they will come. They want to come. Well, they come because they're used to going to yoke in Waikiki, which is part of the Waikiki Health Center. They're just one of the programs within that. That's why we collect the money so that we can buy whatever it is. Yeah. You know, that's why if they have... I'm five, Caroline. You know, thank you for reminding me. It's Valentine's Day, and it's so sad that some people are not fortunate enough to enjoy it in the way they want to. And so, Caroline, with the biggest heart I know in Hawaii, is providing that for them. And if only you can think a little bit with your heart to support these youths and to support Rainbow 808, and to talk to families who do need this help, and embrace everyone. Please, happy Valentine's Day to those people who need the heart. Thank you so much for everything you've said today. And I'm not going to let you go because you're going to come back and talk more. Oh, I love that. I love...