 Oh my gosh, this is gonna be such a good show. There's a question that actually says, how do you handle aging in a society that loves youth? And can I balance being a good wife and mother and having a professional career? Would you do that? I do. Here with the sisters all have to say, coming up. Sister to sister, so glad that you joined us today because this is a panel of five opinionated women of God and you send us questions and we answer from a biblical perspective, right girls? And from our hearts. So I think you'll enjoy these answers today. This question, thanks a lot for sending because it's very pertinent to our world. Listen, is it wrong to indulge in worldly pleasures if you're born again? And I think what you mean by worldly pleasures would be alcohol, drugs, secular music and movies, et cetera, et cetera. What do you think, Rox? Well, first I'm gonna say don't break the law. That's right, that's true, that's true. Then I'm gonna say it's a matter of conscious, maturity, growth and faith because the scripture says in Romans 14, whatever is not of faith is sin. So it's not merely the alcohol we drink or whatever we might do, the smoking. Whatever is not of faith is sin. If God tells you don't gossip and you're talking about somebody, well, you know, you're sinning. So we have to understand where are we in our faith walk that we have to start giving up these things? Paul says, when I was a child, I did childish things but now I'm older and mature. I know better, do you know better? So that's kind of the catalyst, if you know better. And it also says in 1 Corinthians, whatever you do, due to the glory of God, does this glorify God in my life or doesn't it? And that's a simple answer when you look at some of these outward things. Right, right, anybody? Well, as a parent of young adults, I am all about this one scripture right now because we just wanna impress things on our children and culture and friends are coming after them so hard to be like them, to sound like them and we're like, we're operating a different kingdom. So what we say is first on 2 15, if anyone loves the world, the love of the father is not in them. Now it says in the passion, the love of the father and the love of the world are incompatible. There's something about being born again, about being a disciple of Christ, about being a follower of Christ that there is the lust of the eye, the lust of the flesh and the pride of life. That's the world. So when all the girls are going out drinking, are you gonna go get everyone saved at the bar? You know what I mean? It's like, where's our love? Where's our affection? Where's our desire? And if you feed that desire of the lust of the eye, the lust of the flesh and the pride of life, you're gonna crave it. And then you're gonna wanna be more like that and then you'll end up looking more like the world than you do a follower of Christ. I do think we have to be careful about this question. I think it can become legalistic because some people defined worldly pleasures as going to Disney World or going on a cruise. So I do think we have to- Who isn't? That's okay. I just think we have to do be careful a little bit with this question because I think there's the first Corinthians eight about the weaker brother. If it's in for you, okay. There are some things where it's like a gray area like where there's not a specific scripture that says like this is sin. There are some things where it says that do not do this, okay. There are things that are illegal, do not do this. But then there are other things where it's not specifically in scripture where it says that to us. I think there are things that are not inherently bad. I don't think like secular movies are inherently bad. But if you know you struggle with a certain thing, you should avoid that. If you know somebody, you know your spouse or your friend struggles with a certain thing, you should avoid that. I just think it's again, like what you said with maturity or with, you know, you just, you need to know thyself, you know? You know what, Corey? Just tell them off of what you're saying. I'm gonna boldly go where no man has gone. You know, this whole thing, give me grace, Lord, cover me, I'm going in. You know, sometimes we as believers have, we just learned how to be sneaky saints. So I won't have a glass of wine around you because I'm concerned of the judgment. And we'll sit here and not implying us per se, but you know, we'll sit and we'll on a show like this and we'll, you know, don't drink, don't smoke, don't chew, don't hang with those that do. But then when we're on vacation, we got our pina colada, we got our strawberry daiquiri, we have, and so I like what you bought out about being legalistic, but also, you know, honest, like with ourselves, I, you know, if I can have a glass of wine with you, like you said, if me defends my brother, I need to be watchful. But when do I cross the line of just being plain old hypocritical, you know? Like putting on a mask. Whether you agree with it or not, one of the things that has helped me was being cross cultural in that whole ecumenical piece to my ministry because people, different denominations believe differently and I had to learn not to judge and be critical. I came out of that legalistic camp, if you will, you know? And so there are certain convictions I have, like for example, I feel the scripture gives way to both drinking or not drinking. It says, you know, eat, drink and be merry, you know? A little wine for the belly's sake. Then it also said, well, to him, they even give us a man to drink, you know? And well, the don't be drunk is your common denominator because the one thing for sure is to not to get drunk, you know, so if she has wine and I've been in cultures where that's what they, I mean, you walk into the restaurant like how we get a glass of water or, you know, the bottle of wine is there. I've left cultures where the pastors wanted to gift us and bless us and they blessed us with a bottle of wine. And I remember calling back home and asking my pastor at that time, what am I gonna do there? They're wanting to give us a bottle of wine, you know? And he said something to me that firebrand in my spirit, reject the gift, reject the giver. Yeah, yeah. You know? So I think it is something that we need to really operate in wisdom on and take the time to seek the Lord and don't just repeat it because that's something you've been hearing year after year. And don't be a hypocrite with people. That's big. Okay, but I'm gonna go to this question and Corey, I'm gonna ask you this one because it's really good. And you wrote this as you wonder, I'm gonna tell you. Can I balance being a good wife and mother while still pursuing my professional career goals? In other words, can I have it all? Corey, you do. Well, I don't think the definition of having it all is being a good wife and mother and having a career. You can, no one can have it all, okay? You're gonna be sacrificing either way. Having a career or being a say at home mom, there's sacrifices for both, okay? And I think you need to recognize it. So there's no like having it all. It's something you have to decide upon and I think we should support both. I don't think there should be a fight like one is better than the other. You know, there's some people need or want to work and some people need or want to stay home with their kids. And I don't think there should be like a battle of which is better or which is worse or whatever. You know, I've been both. I know you have. I have been both and I was blessed to be a stay at home mom and I missed having a career and I have that as well. So I just, I hate that whole thing, can you have it all? But I do think we, I'm very pro-life and I think that we should support that women can be moms and have a career. I think that this whole idea that you can't, you know, that you have to, you know. Yeah, give up everything because you're gonna have kids is just a false narrative because you can be a mother and you can do all these other things. It's possible. Well, think about the people that we're talking to and we want them to understand how we feel because all of us are professional women and women of God and mothers. What do you say? Say you, Roxy. I say recognize the season in your life. That's good. So good. Or you're gonna miss what God has for you. If it's time to raise your children, it is time to raise your children. If it's time to work, recognize that season and don't look at the other season while you're in that season. Could God says, faithful in what I've given you, you'll be faithful in much. And one scripture that I pray to the Lord about is Ephesians two. God has ordained good works that we should walk in them. We are His workmanship. Good works don't save us, but God has planned things for your life, walk in them. If you're to have that child now, don't reject that. If it's time to work part-time. If it's time to volunteer at school or the library, recognize the season and you're gonna have joy because God does have a plan ahead. We don't know what it is. That was with me. God opened doors I never thought about. I never dreamed about what does He says more than we could ask, dream. He provides. And if we understand and let our lives be left over to Him, leave them to Him and do what's in front of us. Love the season. We are gonna have joy. Yeah. I like it. That's so key. You know what? I just wanna add to that that sometimes life, the imbalance can appear to be making choices for you. And let me give you an example. There was a season, for me, I noticed that I became bitter because I grew up with the stay at home mom. So that was the model in my head. That's how my life is gonna be. Married my husband, he had a good job. The job closes up, you know, Wabco disappears and so that changes everything. So I became, I had to work when I wanted to be at home with the children and I was trying to find that balance and sometimes I had to work more than one job because you also gotta keep a roof over everybody's head. I mean, stuff you don't need me to really go into. And I found myself being bitter and being angry but who would have ever known that the Lord was gonna call my husband home first. And now my children have these nurturing memories of their father that they would not have had had I had been, you know, and so it was, I'm still healing from it because there are times to be honest that I reflect back and I get a little bitter, I get a little angry and there's a relationship that you feel like, you know, I was one of them nursing mothers, you know, and all of that, so, you know. But the fact that he was, it wouldn't have been my choice, you know, but the fact that he was able to be home with them. And when I watched my girl's face light up and all of their dad who doted over them and the memories that they have. And then I watched my son, you know, as he presses for different things, he's so determined and he feels like I have to do this because I promised dad, you know, such and such. And that part makes my heart happy. Though I won't lie, there are times I still grieve, you know, not having what I particularly wanted. But I would have never, that would have never been my choice. And I think for those of you who are listening, I hope you're hearing the hearts of the sisters as we say about balance. And Roxanne said about seasons and Flo is saying, don't look back with resentment and bitterness because God has a plan and it all worked for the good. And that's how God runs things for us. We'll be right back, right after this. Welcome back. Boy, we talking gab while you're getting your coffee and cry. And cry, yeah. But you know what, this next question that you sent us and I have to read it, I'm not crazy about it, but here it goes. How do you embrace aging? I don't. In a society that values the beauty of youth. Roxie. What, me aging? No, no, no. Seriously? Just give me a scripture. You're the scripture girl. Is it, does God say something? You know what, I gotta say this. Proverbs eight, wisdom founded the earth. Wisdom was there with God creating the oceans and the sky. And us, wisdom did it all. That's right. And I'm thinking about, was it Abigail? Maybe the pastors will help me. David Zarmy, her husband Nathan was about to get killed by David Zarmy because he refused to take care of him. She stepped in bold. Go girl. Was that Abigail? Yeah. Okay. And David was attracted to her wisdom. David whose eyes are looking at other women, you know what I'm saying? But I think there's a beauty in wisdom that sets people free. What's it say? Apples of gold and settings of silver. There's nothing like speaking a word to somebody and seeing their freedom or them speaking to you in wisdom and something lifts from you. She or our beauty cannot do that. Although we should take care of ourselves. Right, right. Wow. What do you think pastor? You're youthful? Well, let's just consider the male species versus the female, okay? We place this like the ideal male is a 25 year old buff guy with muscles. I'll go for 40, but okay. That's what the culture's saying. And then you're talking to a 70 year old man. You're someone like my dad who has lived life, who has lived not perfectly but right before God, who has legacy, who has built, who has served God. That is more valuable and precious than a 25 year old cute looking buff guy. Do you know what I'm saying? Like where is our value? What is beautiful? The wisdom of the ages, the season of life. I mean, I just turned 50 this year. I'm not old and I'm not young. I'm like right, you know, in that middle generation and my mom modeled be natural, be who you are. You know, the next generation already has lip fillers and you know, at 20. So who am I in all of this? I think it's just being aware of being like the best you that you can in every season of life. I look at old pictures and I kind of go, oh. I mean, I already looked just such a difference. 30 years ago, it's like, oh my gosh, God helped me just to appreciate the value and the wisdom of these years and this life that we've built. You know? That's so good, Corey. You're young. I think about us at this table and we have been doing this for 10 years. Okay, and when I think about like 10 years and I look back and I'm like, oh man, I was like so much thinner and I looked so much younger. We started, but I feel like I have learned so much in 10 years. And we have grown so much. We've grown in friendship and wisdom. I've learned so much from my sisters. And like that is so much more valuable even though I really wish I was looked and as thin as I was back then. I wouldn't trade that for the relationship and the wisdom that I have gained from sitting beside you in those 10 years. And that 10 years, that growth that has happened in those 10 years. And so I think it's just grasping, you know, that value when we age as opposed to what we have lost in physicality. That's right. Well, I'm gonna move to the next question because it's really good. Oh. No, I'm gonna answer this one. Okay. So back to this whatever age you say it. 25. 40 year old. Pray for me. Cause a nice 40, maybe we go with 50. 45 year old 50, double dip in chocolate. Muscles this. We're good. No, but anyway. No, but anyway. No, but anyway, no, but anyway, no, but anyway, no, but anyway. Double dip, double dip, double dip. Double dip. Chocolate. Double dip. No, but I think to youth has to do with the spirit. The attitude of the heart. You know what I mean? So it's not just aesthetically. And I think we get caught up a lot on the aesthetics, you know, which brings us to all the filler in the lips and which I don't get. I'm concerned about you getting all that stuff injected in you and where does it go? And 20 year olds are doing that now. Yeah, I don't know. But anyway, I do. I think that youth has more to do with your spirit. I mean, after all, when you think about going home to be with the Lord and we're living for eternity, will we age there? Nope. You're ageless. I don't think so. Okay, now I'm gonna move to the next question. Okay, you move to the next question. You know what, I wanna get to these questions because you sent them and you asked, are there leadership roles that you believe women should or should not take within the church? And we are leaders and Amy, you're a pastor. Give me the scoop. Yeah, I feel like a horse out of a gate with this question. So I like have to think of just one thing because I've been studying it for so long. I just am full of it. So my mind, so I just wanna bring one scripture, one thought, you know, toward the attention because I don't think half of humanity should be shut down and their voices should be shut down because they're female. In Romans 16, and honestly, do a deep dive study in the book of Romans 16, that chapter, and just unpack it and do the search. Paul talking, now let me introduce you to our dear and beloved sister in the faith, Phoebe. That's right. A shining minister of the church in Centria. I am sending her with this letter. Okay, what letter? And ask that you shower her with your hospitality when she arrives, embrace her with honor as it is fitting for one who belongs to the Lord and is set apart for him. So provide her whatever she may need for she's been a great leader and a champion for many. I know for she's been that even with me. So just the very named Phoebe, the shining, radiant, bright, prophetic leader in the body of Christ. I want you to picture that she is sitting in the meetings with Apostle Paul as he's writing the book of Romans. I mean, like the Roman road about faith and transformation. I mean, can you imagine our life without the book of Romans, right? She's right next to him. He is articulating things to her because she's going to carry the letter of the book of Romans. And if you read and you look at a map of where she's traveling with this letter and then she's going to take it and she's going to articulate it. She is a carrier of the gospel. So for any woman thinking I can't eloquently share the gospel, teach the gospel, be a life group leader, be a youth pastor, associate, nothing could be further from the truth. God wants to use all of his kids to carry the gospel message. That was just simply excellent. I love that. And I just want to just, I don't even know if it's considered, I don't know what this is, but I'm just thinking, you know, Amy, you bought that out so eloquently and when you think of Jesus' mother, Mary, who instructed him for his first, released him basically into ministry, his first miracle. Mary Magdalene, the first one to show up with the tomb and the Samaritan woman who evangelized the town after having the encounter. So I mean, there's just, example after example, I love the fact that you just, let me just get this one thing and you just did so eloquently with it, but there are so many examples, right? Well, can you take us out with the scripture? Yes, Joel, I will pour out my spirit, God says, on all flesh, this is Old Testament. Your sons and daughters will dream dreams. Don't deny what God has put in you because somebody is telling you no. You will, the Lord says. I will pour my spirit on all flesh. In heaven, there is no male and female. I hate to tell everybody, but that's what God looks at. He looks at the heart and he gives gifts freely unto men and women. Well, when you think about it and you ask us these questions and we have leaders in the church, we have leaders in business, we have professional women, we have older wisdom and younger youth. Why does she say older and point over here to me? Why? Because you're with me, baby. That's all I know. She wants a double. Okay, listen, we're so grateful that you're with us every week. We are sister to sister and we're gonna wrap this up right now. Here on Sister to Sister, we always close the show with scripture and today's scripture is from Psalms, chapter 62, verses five through eight. Let all that I am wait quietly before God for my hope is in him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken. My victory and honor come from God alone. He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me. Oh, my people, trust in him at all times. Pour out your heart to him for God is our refuge. Our producer chose this verse without having any idea how much this passage would mean to me. And I know I'm showing emotion right now because my family's been going through a lot right now. We have three family members that are struggling with cancer right now and three young family members struggling with mental health issues right now. And I'm just so grateful that the Lord gives us verses like this that we can stand upon and that we can pour out our hearts to him. Amen. Amen. When I say that our verse is iron sharpens iron, that that makes me a better Kathy and all that that I say to you as we end, what I want you to know is that we love Jesus but we have pain and despair too but we have joy that lifts us up. We'll see you next time.