 Good morning, my beautiful, lovely internet friends. Welcome back to my channel. Normally, I sit back there in film, but I cannot spend one more day in this house, so we're going to take this video on an adventure and start with going for a drive, getting some errands done, and answering your questions when it comes to mental health. So recently over on Instagram, uh, linked somewhere here, I never know where to point on the screen. I've been doing this for like three years now. You'd think I would have figured it out. I asked you guys what kind of mental health topics you'd like me to cover. Mental health is something I'm very passionate about, and also something that I am intimately familiar with from the mental illness perspective. I've dealt with depression and life-ending thoughts and anxiety and panic attacks and PTSD for a number of years now, and talking about it is something that's been very healing to me. But first, as I often say in many situations, coffee. So the audio here is censored because of YouTube copyright issues, but I'm rocking out to the weekend save your tears. But what if they're both very, very long? Now that we have made it to the ridiculously long Dutch Brothers coffee line, we have a minute to chat. So I'm going to be going through and answering these questions starting today with one about PTSD and the stigmas associated with it. But this video is really kind of just a teaser of what's to come. In the next few videos that you see on my channel, I'm going to be doing a whole series about mental health and mental illness and my experience with that as it is deeply played into who I am as a person, what I'm passionate about, and what I like to talk about. The first thing we are going to talk about today is PTSD, which is post-traumatic stress disorder and these stigmas or assumptions that are associated with it. So back in 2012, I was diagnosed with PTSD and that diagnosis came as both a huge relief because I finally could feel like I wasn't a crazy person but also came with a lot of fear because of what that meant. I was worried that it was going to be forever, that it was going to be the rest of my life, that it was kind of like a mental death sentence, which it's not. Post-traumatic stress disorder is something that is caused by some kind of trauma and also gets better as time goes on and as you work on things, as you figure out what your triggers are, as you work through your trauma that has definitely been the case for me. I'm eight years, almost nine years past that and I still occasionally deal with things but it's exponentially better than it was. I found that another one of the big stigmas associated with it is that it's only soldiers coming home from war who have PTSD. Now this stigma kind of makes sense considering the fact that PTSD was first studied and diagnosed from my understanding on Vietnam veterans coming back because people realized there's something going on here, there's something deeper than people just having a hard time adjusting but here's the thing guys, as you probably know, mental illness does not discriminate. Anyone can get PTSD. I did. I have it from a very traumatic relationship and being sexually assaulted. By the way, it's really weird to be holding up a camera and talking to myself in a very long drive-through line where people can see me. People can see you son! Parks and Rec? Anybody? Another stigma with PTSD that I hear pretty often is that it makes you a violent person. PTSD in and of itself does not make you violent. There are some situations in which it affects a person's mental health or the trauma that they experience and the flashback that PTSD causes can result in violent action but that is by no means a common thing with PTSD. It does not make you a violent person if this is an illness that you suffer from. So I'm looking over all of your questions on Instagram. The most commonly asked question was about anxiety and how to cope with it, how to deal with it. I feel like that deserves its own video so please know I have heard your questions and I will be addressing them in the future. Guys, we're getting so close. It's right there. It's kind of funny. I have an amputation. I deal with PTSD. I live in a very military town. We have five military bases, count them five, in the immediate area and so whenever I say I have PTSD or someone sees my amputation commonly the reaction will be where you win the war, where you win the military and I have to be like nope fell off a horse and just suffered other kinds of trauma. Lots of military friends but not personally military. This next question is one of my favorites. How to ask for help from friends when you feel like you'd be bugging them or making their problems worse or burdening them. This is something I felt a lot and I think most of us have felt. So what do we do about it? Hello, well thank you. Appreciate it. And after an agonizing 30-minute wait, we have it guys. So I said I was going to get coffee but once I got to the drive-through line I realized what I actually needed today was an ocean water soda. I don't even like soda. Onika the amputee introduced me to these things and they are ruining my life. Actually they're just super delicious. So you're dealing with something, you're having a hard time, maybe you're struggling with some kind of mental health issue or mental illness but your friends having a hard time too. They're dealing with their own stuff so you don't want to talk to them about it because it's only going to make it worse, right? I've had that narrative go on in my head countless times over the years since led to me feeling really isolated which is understandable, right? I feel like I can't talk to people around me. I've had so many conversations with my counselor where I'm like, everybody else's lives are falling apart too so I'm just going to be there to support them but I don't know what to do because I don't know where to find support but it took me a little while to recognize the fact that as human beings we long for connection, we want to know we're not alone and that goes for your friends as well. Here's the thing when my friend is struggling or going through a hard time, my reaction is not to be like, you're burdening me, you're making my life more difficult, please stop. It makes me feel trusted. I want to help, I want to be there, I want to do what I can do even if I'm dealing with my own stuff but I so desperately want to listen to and help my friends who are dealing with something as well and it's taken me a long time to realize that they feel the same way, right? As humans we want connection, we actually appreciate vulnerability. It's a dangerous thing to do but it's so important. So what do you do when you feel like you might be burdening your friends with your stuff? Obviously it comes down to every individual friendship, relationship, is that person a safe person to tell this about but I would encourage you in the direction of the idea that maybe your friends wouldn't feel burdened if you shared something with them, maybe they would also feel less alone, maybe they would feel trusted and like they could be helpful and feeling useful and like we can support our friends helps us too. It's a mutually beneficial thing. The problem with these drinks is that you drink them way, way too quickly. Oh it's so good. So while we are on the topic of mental health let's go on a little adventure and pick up my antidepressant for the next 30 days because that's important. This is something I've done multiple videos about. I have been on a prescription antidepressant for a few years. I got off of it for a couple months. It did not do well being out of my system. My brain didn't do well without it and so I'm back on it. Medication is something that can be so helpful to a lot of people. It's definitely not the solution for everybody. It's not something I want to be on the rest of my life but it is a very healthy and beneficial tool right now so let's go do that as we tackle our next question which is what can we do when we feel like our physical health challenges are pushing back our mental health issues? Okay so that adventure failed. It was filled a different location for the fourth time in a row. Something's going on with their system. Let's go to the other location, maybe get lunch on the way. Lunchtime and we have success. When our physical health comes in the way of and starts impacting our mental health journey what do we do with that? As you guys know I faced my fair share of physical challenges be it you know ankle surgeries or migraines or other related illnesses. So when your physical health starts facing challenges issues your mental health is absolutely impacted and what I've personally found is that so often I will be like focusing on my mental health because I want to get my brain in a better place. I'm trying to develop good coping strategies. I'm trying to practice those, trying to have healthy activities and do all the right things and then I'll have to have another surgery and then I'm like how can I focus on my mental health? How can I get my brain to a better place as I'm dealing with this overwhelming surgery or this overwhelming diagnosis or whatever it is? And for me I've learned two things. Number one there are different seasons to focus on different things. So there have been times when my physical health and my physical body needed to take precedence over focusing on healing and you know dealing with my mental health. And sometimes that's been really hard to face because I'm like I'm finally making progress in therapy or I'm finally getting to a better place with depression and now I feel like I'm just going to be taking steps backwards because I have to focus on this physical crap. Ah you know it's frustrating. But the second thing that I would encourage someone in that kind of situation is that it doesn't have to be either or. Like I've said physical health impacts mental health so when you are facing a challenge in either area you're going to feel effects in the other. So if you are dealing with something physical that is taking a lot of your energy even though maybe you aren't taking leaps and bounds forward with your mental health at least investing a few minutes a day to checking in with yourself to practicing healthy coping strategies. Maybe you aren't working through things maybe it's more of a management thing for a short period of time and just sort of straddling that that balancing act between taking care of your body and taking care of your mind because it's important that they both be paid attention to. But there is only so much energy and there are only so many hours in the day. So there are times where I've had to prioritize one over the other. Now that I have some food in me I think it's time to go for a short walk outside and enjoy some of the sunshine before it is gone. The next big question how do you deal when you feel like you've overcome your depression and then it comes back those feelings of a failure. Let's talk about that. I think I waited just a minute too long folks. Check it out we've got the gray rainy skies as far as the eye can see. Also it's cold so I'm going to go back to my car now. And we've made it safely home where I have a very heavy puppy. She's very excited we don't know why. I'm going to make myself some coffee. What do we think pink month today? Mmm perfect. So you've dealt with depression before you beat it you're feeling good and all of a sudden some of the symptoms start to come back or maybe it's something related to PTSD or trauma or triggers. So oftentimes when we kind of relapse with mental health like this there can be these feelings of guilt or shame or self-blame or anger towards ourselves because we were past this. How do we get back to this place you know? This is definitely something that I have faced many times with specifically depression and PTSD triggers where I've beat it I've done it I'm good and then all of a sudden I sink back really low out of nowhere and it feels like it's all my fault but here's the thing it's not mental health is a moving target and we learn new coping strategies we learn how to deal we get through difficult moments and then sometimes things get hard again and that's okay. Here's the thing though if you're having symptoms of something there's a reason for that perhaps it's a biological reason perhaps it's a chemical reason perhaps it's a situational reason maybe there was something that brought things back up for you and even if you don't know what that reason is what you're experiencing is okay there's no reason to blame yourself or to hate yourself for it for struggling though those things are kind of woven into the fabric of how we think about mental health. So to the question what do we do when we find ourselves in these situations we take care of ourselves we seek the help that we need we talk to people we employ coping strategies that we know work we try new ones if the old ones aren't working and that's okay mental health is not some static thing it's not like once you check the box of like I got better from that thing it's never going to be an issue again because sometimes things come and go and perhaps they get better slowly but surely over time but it can kind of feel like a roller coaster so there's no reason to feel bad if you find yourself in another dip but there is a lot of reason to care for yourself and to find the help that you need to get through that. It's a little too hot to drink so aggressively so talking about mental health is something I've been really passionate about for a long time I have a whole channel dedicated to it called Traumatoc if you don't know I've linked it down below but I wanted to start speaking a little bit more openly about mental health things here on this channel sharing stories sharing personal experiences because I get questions about this all the time and for a long time I almost felt like like if I was talking about mental health and not just amputation like it wasn't something people wanted to hear about here but I've realized that's not true I've realized that I can speak more freely here and I'm really grateful for that and so like I said at the top of this video there will be more mental health topics coming your way soon things like mental health and chronic pain and chronic illness because oh boy are those things related things like how I have personally experienced PTSD and what caused that tips and experiences around anxiety and around depression if you have a video topic you would specifically like me to cover please feel free to send it to me over Instagram or via email whatever worked for you and I really appreciate you guys listening and also running errands with me today it is now like full for snowing outside man Colorado is weird I was wearing shorts I'm like a light hoodie this morning and now I'm bundled up inside I live in a very unpredictable state thank you so much to my incredible patrons over on Patreon for supporting these videos for sincerely making them possible you guys are the reason I am financially able to do all this and I am truly in debt to you forever with gratitude thank you if you're interested in what Patreon is here's a link on screen also down below but most importantly to you watching this video right now I hope you're hanging in there today I hope you're taking care of yourself and valuing who you are because you are fabulous just the way you are thank you for spending a few minutes out of your day here with me today chatting with me listening to me you could be anywhere else in the world doing anything else and you chose to hang out with me for a few minutes and that means a lot to me thank you I love you guys I'm thinking about you and I will see you in the next video bye guys it's not even like the taste of coffee I mean it is the taste of coffee but it's like the whole experience of coffee that's just so calming and lovely to me and I'm so grateful for coffee in my life coffee has legitimately helped my mental health I can say that without a shout of a doubt so thank you coffee