 Twitch chat, I asked them. If you had questions bubbling up inside you about love, about finding your person, or maybe you have a little bit of trouble, I'm here to help. I am your matchmaker, and I got all sexy for you. Oh my God! Oh! I married John Pork, help. When you say that you married John Pork, I don't think that that's a problem. In fact, we've talked about John Pork a little bit, these last couple of streams, and for those of you watching on YouTube, if you don't know John Pork, he's one of the sexiest men I've ever seen in my life. Look at this man, John Pork. Who is John Pork? Well, he's an influencer, he's sort of a king of his craft in a way. If you're dating, if you're married to John Pork, what are you even complaining about? What do you mean, help? You're already being helped by John Pork. He's famous. He's got money. He's got pizzazz. John Pork is self-made. He didn't inherit anything from his family, but as you can see in this photo, he does come from old money. When he was younger, he separated the wealth of his family with the wealth that he wanted to create for himself. He does have a rich family. He didn't take any of that. He is the moment. He's not in any way a nepo baby. Do I only get a timed trial of John Pork? How do I get a girl to engage in conversation more? So this one goes both ways. For anyone that you're trying to court, there's a couple of ways of doing it. One, you have to figure out what their interests are. Maybe they're interested in Overwatch, unfortunately. You talk about Symmetra or something, or other, who's big pig guy? Who's the John Pork of Overwatch? Or if you can't think of anything similar to their interests to talk about, you can always use cool distractions or come up with a cool trick. Y'all ever heard about a cool trick? You could learn different skills. You could learn how to use Rubik's Cube. Or you could learn the power of juggling. And everyone knows that a man who juggles is a man who fucks. My boyfriend is a superhero and he's a kind of mediocre one at that. He feels bad about not being cool enough, but he literally beats up bad guys all the time. Help, how do I boost his confidence? Boyfriend is Hawkeye. Ooh, no, I don't wanna dock some, but it might be. This is controversial, what I'm about to say, okay? Because some people will say, oh, that's not good, that's a false confidence thing, or, oh, you're going behind, they're back to, if they find out about this, they might not be thrilled. But you're saying that he beats up bad guys all the time. Maybe, I don't know, maybe he wants to beat up more bad guys or maybe he's looking for a certain situation. But I think, I don't know where you live, but people will do anything for a quick buck. So I think maybe what you do, you set up some scenarios. You set up some fake fights, some fake robberies. Maybe you get a big evil villain. A big evil villain. And he's like, oh man, I've got your partner right where you want them, okay? Or right where I want them, right? I've got you right where I want you. So then, by proxy, it would be right where they want them. Right? Make up a scenario, make them feel like the big guy. Throw a parade, throw a parade. If they're feeling down and out and they're feeling mediocre, round the town together. Again, I don't know where you are, but maybe, I don't know, put out a flyer. Get a bunch of people and throw a parade. Everyone loves a parade. How much could a parade cost? Each year, massive floats, glittery costumes, other parade expenses, top 13 million. Total of 26 extravagant floats. Average costs raging from 30,000 to 100,000. Jesus Christ. So you might need to pull an Ethan Nesser Crank gameplays and do an OnlyFans to fund the parade. But I think if you make a parade for them, it should be fun. I want to date a leaker, but I don't know how to recognize one. Well, first of all, any leaker will have a set of morals, a certain style, a certain aura about them. The ones who are at the top of the leaker board, if you will, obviously, are Sean and myself. And what do we ooze? What Sean and I ooze is what the leakers absorb. So what do we ooze? Sex appeal, okay? Good taste, good looks, good smells. Great style, riz. We have loads of riz. Gallons. Well, for Sean, it's leaders because he's across the ocean. Someone who knows how to goon, exactly. If the person that you're pursuing isn't constantly edging, gooning, jelking, then are they truly a leaker? Not sure. I think at the end of the day, honestly, if you're not attracted to them, if you're immediately like, wow, this person, it's like a magnet, they're probably a leaker. Oh my God, guys. I don't want to show this one yet because I'm a little bit afraid of the repercussions if this person is watching. Okay, we're gonna do it. It'll be fine. I don't think that the person is watching. My boyfriend, John Pork, has a secret family. What should I do? Dude, that sucks to hear because I really look up to John Pork. But to find out, like, if this is real and John Pork is unfaithful, not only that he's unfaithful, but he has a family. There is, I want to go out ahead of time and say that there's absolutely nothing wrong with polyamory as long as it's all communicated and consensual and everything like that. But I don't think that this is the case. Like, I don't think that the original question asker that said, I'm married to John Pork, I don't think that they're aware of this. And like, I'm not trying to cancel John Pork. I want to come out and say that I'm not trying to cancel John Pork. John Pork being adulterous is my personal 9-11. Fuck man, this sucks. I'm super surprised that John Pork being married that we don't know about it. John Pork at a wedding. No worries, I'm still single. The wedding bells weren't ringing for me. So John Pork is lying in two ways. One, John Pork, you're not single, but also you have another lover on the side. If the cheating scandal that we've just uncovered, if we hadn't learned about that, I would be like, okay, like you want to keep your relationship private. Like for the safety of your family, for the safety of your children, that is completely respectable if you want to, you know, pretend like you are single to keep your privacy. That's fine. But finding out now that he's sleeping around while he has not only a spouse, but a family as well, you have to think about the children in this case. Like that fucking sucks, dude. If I were on your end of things, I would take the moral high ground. I would leave the relationship and I would say John Pork, I found out about your spouse and your family and I can't do that. I don't want to be a home wrecker. Whether or not you tell John Pork's spouse, that's up to you, I think. If I was John Pork's husband and John was cheating on me, I would want to know. So I'll leave that with you. This is a fantastic question, guys. If gay bad, why boobs? If gay bad, why boobs? I think is a fantastic question that you should be bringing up to your local congressperson. To Joe Biden, exactly. I think that that's an important question to bring up. And I will come out and say, in support of boobs, it's more popular nowadays, I think, to be an ass man. We can do a poll and chat right now. I would actually like to see where you guys land on this and let me know if you're watching the YouTube video in the comments. Tits are ass because I think it's a very important question. I don't think it's a question that we're asking enough. I think this day and age, we're afraid to ask this question, but I think that it's important to dig deep within yourself and say, okay, where do I align? Where do I want to stand in history? And there's no right or wrong answer, but there is a line. You can't be a fence sitter. You have a preference and I think that there comes a time when you have to say, hey, I'm a tits man. Hey, I'm an ass man. I think that you need to take a solid stance. Guys, this one is really tough. An explanation on how to eat pussy. I want chat to tell me how to eat pussy. Well, first you need a spoon. Okay. Okay. A fork and knife gotta keep it classy. All right. Firmly grasp it. Okay. Always remember to have napkins. Okay. Obama keeps giving me hickeys and he won't stop. Dude, that's a tough one. Harry Styles. Harry. Harry Styles. Harry Styles, Barack Obama. Huh? Harry Styles from E-News. Harry Styles' response to report that he had an affair with Barack Obama. A lot of people would love to have an affair with Harry Styles, but we don't think Barack Obama is one of them. The hoax national examiner covers features Obama with a line of text that reads, had sex with Obama, had sex with this man with an arrow that points to the one direction or member. While most people would read this as an absolute disbelief, no one was more surprised to hear about this affair than Styles himself. I honestly have no idea what you're talking about. I've heard some good news in my, some good ones in my time, but that's interesting. Now what's that sounds like? That sounds like a classic case of denial. That sounds like there may be something going on but tweaks the two of them. I mean, look at this photo. Huh? Seems to be a lot of proof. I don't want to talk bad about Harry, but Obama's not president anymore. And maybe Obama is trying to hold on to this love that Harry was attracted to when he was one of the most powerful figures in the world. I mean, the president of the United States is one of the most powerful people in the world. Harry might've found that power alluring and now that he's not president anymore, Harry might be a little turned off by that. He might be like, all right, you've given me what I wanted and now you can't offer that to me anymore. And he's not that into it, but Obama's hanging on. It's tough. That's really tough, Harry. I think that you need to tell Obama straight up that you're done and that you're, you're just not into it anymore. All right guys, last question. How do I tell the hoes that they only like me because I'm autistic? Please help, it's becoming a problem. They've swarmed me like flies to shit. How do you tell the hoes that? Turn up the Tizm Riz. Turn up the Tizm, turn down the Riz, okay? That's, ghost him. He goes to the hoes. Is that the best thing to do? If they can't hang, you hang up. Oh yeah, you're autistic. Tell me your special interest. Pussy. Well friends, we have gone through the relationship advice. We have asked some questions, answered some questions. We've dug up some drama. I'm not responsible for what happens next after this. Specifically with John Park, I'm not responsible. If you can contribute to any relationship advice, you let me know in the comments. Happy Valentine's Day. Thank you for watching. I'll see you in the next video. Goodbye.