 The narcissist turns your life upside down. They disrupt or overturn everything that you know and are familiar with. It changes completely. Making you confused or upset. But you always have a choice. You always have an option. But what keeps you enmeshed with them is that when you've been with a narcissist for so long you've been manipulated into trying to adjust to them rather than adjusting to your own needs. You haven't been attending to your needs because you've been too preoccupied with adjusting yourself to the narcissist and being whatever they need you to be. You've been programmed to focus on and attend to them at all times so you don't have the time to look at your own situation and how it is becoming progressively worse. This is why you need to determine where you are now. You need to assess the damage that has been caused already to then be able to accurately predict how bad it will be in the future because it always gets worse with the narcissist. You think you have it bad now. You think you've been through a lot. But just imagine what it will be like in a few more months or a few more years. Imagine the effects that it will have on you mentally and financially. They do things in such a subtle way where you don't really notice it at first. They use clever and indirect methods to get what they want until you begin to notice parts of your life falling apart or fading away, which is why you have to focus on getting out of these relationships. You cannot stay in relationships with these types of people. The longer you stay, the more damage you will be doing to yourself. The longer you stay, the more you will lose your happiness and enjoyment in every aspect of your life. You will develop health problems, stress, anxiety, depression, CPTSD, adrenal fatigue. You will develop problems with focus, learning and memory, social communication and interaction issues. You will develop financial issues, sexual problems. You will have all of this to deal with when it is finally over, when you stay with a narcissist for long periods of time. You will become so emotionally disturbed you won't even recognize yourself. It will take you a very long time to recover, a very long time until you finally begin to enjoy the little things in life again. You feel like you need to hold on to this relationship. You feel like it's going to be worse if you don't trust your gut instinct or intuition. You don't need to think it over or get another person's opinion. You just know what is right and what you need to do. Trusting your intuition is the ultimate act of trusting yourself. All of the answers you need to get out of this situation are within yourself. Your intuition has been trying to tell you what you need to do. That's why you've been experiencing stress and anxiety. That's why you've been getting depressed. It's trying to tell you that this is not the right situation for you to be in. If it was, you would be happy. You would be at peace with yourself. Your intuition has been trying to pull you out of this situation but you've invested so much into the narcissist. Everything you had, you gave it to them and when they're finally gone, all of your passion and feelings of intense enthusiasm, all of your love, money and career, that stays with the narcissist. You come out lacking all of your good qualities, lacking everything you established and worked for. You leave with nothing, empty, just as they were when they met you. After you have lost everything that you worked so hard to establish and you've given your life away to someone who didn't even value or appreciate it, you lose motivation and ambition. You don't want to try anymore. You become miserable and depressed. Just like narcissists are and once you've become depressed, it's very hard to get out of that state. The manipulation, gaslighting and mind games will be very damaging to your health and happiness. This is why you have to stop yourself, just to think about what you're getting yourself into. Think about what it's going to be like in a few more months or years. Think about how much more miserable and depressed you're going to become because nothing good is going to come out of this. Don't focus on how you're going to be losing the narcissist. Because in the process of staying with them, you're only going to end up losing yourself and that is the greatest loss you will ever experience in your life. The longer you stay with them, the worse it's going to get and the more damage you're going to do to yourself until you don't even recognise who you are. But the narcissist will move on. They've turned your life upside down. They've messed your life up so they can move on and be completely fine because they know the damage that they've done to you. They leave you in a state where you're no good for anyone else after they've gone. So what do they have to worry about? They don't have to worry about you finding someone else, moving on and being happy. That's how they look at it. They know exactly what they did to you. They know the effects of what they did. They are aware of the mental suffering that you are now experiencing and they know just how difficult it will be for you to compensate for their faults or bad aspects after they have turned your life upside down. The longer you stay with them, the more difficult it will be to reverse the effects of their abusive treatment. Some people never recover from this, but you can recover from narcissistic abuse. And it all starts by removing yourself from this situation. You have to get yourself out of there. Before it's too late, you need to plan how you are going to do it and where you are going to go. You need to put yourself in a situation where you are able to focus on your healing and recovery. A situation where you finally have the time and energy to focus on yourself. There may be a period of isolation, a period of time where you just want to keep to yourself and that's okay. It's completely normal. Just as the caterpillar builds a cocoon and then transforms into a butterfly, you will soon be a lot stronger and wiser and more able to protect yourself against these types of people. You can't change the past, but you can certainly determine your future. Thank you for watching. I hope this video resonated with you. Please like, comment, share and subscribe. Click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos. If you would like to donate, my PayPal link is in the video description. Culture and inquiries you can email me and ask for my coaching at gmail.com. Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon.