 You need to hit it. Everybody need to gather around for this one. This is a very special rendition. I wasn't saying you specifically, my brother. I was talking to us as a community, as a whole, as a black community, as a market, as a record label, staff, and a company. Yeah. Because this is breaking news and some new information. Hot off the press that may save somebody's life. Yeah. We got the book right here. It's not complicated. It's not. But you're making it hard. Now, I had to go call in a specialist for what I've been seeing on the internet. All this is back and forth and arguing and all these podcasts and stuff. Somebody got to make some sense of all this. And I think I found the right person to do it. Ms. Alicia Price. Yes. And before I tell you what she does, I'm just going to let you know that I'm going to let her tell you what she does first, because I know. But I think you need to hear it from her. And then I'll follow up with that. Yes. Thank you. They're all yours. Thank you for having me. I am your favorite co-parenting coach. Say it one more time. I am your favorite co-parenting coach. What's a co-parenting coach? I am a co-parenting coach and expert. I work with single parents and divorced parents, also those who have never been married, to figure out how do they cooperatively co-parent. How do you work together as parents to raise your children? That's a damn good question. Yes. So how do you do it? Man, you shut the fuck up. First, is that in the book? You shut the fuck up. What page is that on the book? No, we keep it all the way real. Like, really, it's an adult thing. Kids are absolutely not the problem. Adults need to learn how to work together. And it all starts with communication. So part of communicating is listening. And if you're talking, you can't be listening. So I like to work with parents so that they're not arguing in front of their children and they can cooperate. So it's like a workbook. Yes. Yes, it's a guide. You've got to split up what a daddy can say his part and then she can write her part back. Also, they can just kind of pass it. You're like, you're talking to kids and all. I said my little boy like that. Well, this book in particular is for mothers to work through what they have to navigate as it relates to co-parenting and healing from the relationship. But fathers can also gain a lot from the tools in the book. And you mentioned kind of the passing it back and forth. And we do some activities in the coaching in terms of kind of sharing journals and being able to really articulate what it is that you're feeling. Yeah. So it's good work. So you've got to talk about your feelings. You have to. You have to. You have to. It's deep. It's deep. Co-parenting is something that also married couples do. If you're cohabitating, you're still co-parenting. And a lot of times we get a bad rap for if you're a single mother or a single father and you need to co-parent. People think that it's automatically drama. There's something wrong. But we need to learn how to actually hear each other in terms of what parenting looks like. And if we want to break cycles of what single-parent households look like and, you know. When did you get it? The Maury-Povitch show. When did you get it? Like, when did it make sense to you? Were you like, oh? So we were at my son's conferences in fifth grade. And I remember the teacher saying to us, he didn't know until my son stood up and read an essay in class that he didn't live with both his mom and his dad. And it just clicked for me. I was like, wow. Like, if the school didn't recognize that he wasn't living with both of us, then we made it. Like, we made it. We did it. And that was because our communication was seamless. They could tell his dad something that I also knew. And we showed up as a collective, as a team for our son, although we weren't living in the same household. And that's essential to raising our children to be whole, to be healed, to be healthy, you know, to not be out here in the streets in a bunch of drama. We need fathers to be present. And we need mothers to accept them. Keep going. Just keep going. Say what needs to be said. I mean, that's it. That's it. Say what needs to be said. You get this. You know, there's a lot of toxic behavior that's happening, especially in the black community. You know, we're calling our babies my baby instead of our child. And a lot of women are taking a lot of ownership on that role of being a mother instead of really just, you know, recognizing it takes a village. You don't have to do it by yourself. There are a lot of men I've noticed in my work who really want to be present. They wanna be there. They wanna understand what's going on with the mothers, but they just don't know how to communicate sometimes. And if the relationship has been toxic, who do you go to? You know, sometimes you can't go to your mom because your mom is like, I don't like the heifer either. Right? So you gotta reach out. You know, and you gotta get support from a neutral party. And so at the Price Dynamic, which is my organization, we provide co-parenting coaching. We provide family mediation. We provide supervised visitation for parents who don't have custody. So that way you have a safe and neutral environment to start to work on some of these skills and tools. How can they contact you and get some of this info? AlishaPrice.com, also the PriceDynamic.com, and all of the products, book, cards, everything is available on the website. Tell me about the cards. So the cards come from actually, I don't know how much you know about the, you know, the co-parenting dynamic. I'm not sure. I know a lot about it. All right. I'm actually an expert at it. Okay, so when we think we know what the other party is gonna say, here's some actual, the cards that are open. But when we think we know what the other person is gonna say, we can't listen, right? So if you're trying to communicate with your co-parent, these cards serve as a purpose or as a tool for having a conversation or making decisions as a team without one person taking over or the authority. So it eliminates all the yelling, it eliminates you assuming you know what the other person is gonna say. And there are prompts that really help you to walk through how to make decisions and set rules for your children. What is your inner voice telling you about this decision? One of my favorite cards, hands down, trips everybody up is, what would you tell another family about you know, this particular situation or what kind of advice would you give another family? Are you supposed to shuffle these? No. Cause there was a bunch of safety cards in there. Yeah, so the safety cards, each family member gets a safety card. Oh, you pass these out. Yeah, the green cards are the safety cards. So like your children actually can get them and they can have a voice in the conversation and everybody takes turns. Oh, that's just the one you need to win the argument right here. Nobody can interrupt me while I'm talking. You heard what the lady said, I got the card and I had big joker. You know, and it gives people, gives them some tools, right? Because you know, a lot of times we get stuck in the ways that we've learned to communicate which can be toxic. And we're all about breaking generational curses around here. We need to do things different and we need to support our children and show them healthy relationships. So the cards definitely help with that. These babies need us. Yes, they do. Yeah. And you said you're a co-parenting expert yourself. I am, I got some, whatever you need from me, I can let you know. Right on. What it is from, come somebody's baby daddy. Whatever you, if you ever need some insight from somebody's baby daddy that's active in the field. Yes. Still out here. Yep. Like me. I'm gonna do that. They ain't gonna tell you what I heard. I'm gonna tell you what I know. I am absolutely gonna do that. This the hardest job I have ever had. Parenting, right? It's not just parenting. I told you, being somebody's baby daddy. I am a statistic. It is difficult. I'm trying to do the right thing. Get this stigma off me and change the perception of baby daddy's. Yep, yep, yep. And it doesn't have to be complicated. It really doesn't. It doesn't. It doesn't. We make things harder. You just have to, like the trick to being a baby daddy is just let her say that shit she's saying and then have your backup plan already ready. Cause you know that shit ain't gonna work. All right, yeah, okay. All right. We're gonna pick the birthday cake up at seven o'clock in the morning. Okay. And then, but how did I start? What did I say? What you supposed to do? You spoke, right? Express your feelings. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. And that's it. That's the thing about it. Me and no. They do. They do. But it is difficult, especially in my work. We see a lot of men who are doing supervised parenting time, which is really hard, right? To, you know, only be able to see your child while somebody is observing that. That ain't even how parenting works. Right, right. And so we're able to do a lot more support and coaching in that space. And then it also helps, of course, by representation matters. You know, when you walk into an organization and there are black folks there and they understand what you're talking about and can support you through, you know, kind of that court process too. Yeah. Which is... You don't want that process. Right. I didn't even know you was gonna bring that process up. Yeah. You don't want those problems, man. Get you some of these cards and do your thing. Cause going to court is... Listen, coaching, family mediation and utilizing the supports that you have in your community is way cheaper. Yeah, man. Than the court, than the lawyers, and all that goes with that, way cheaper. Yeah. And if you need further instructions, just talk to some people who got a lot of kids. I'm telling you, that'll save you so much stress. Yeah. Not like three, four, like seven, eight, nine, 11, or like... You know somebody. 11 kids? Those people got the best type of advice. Yeah, that's common. Every black neighborhood got one person they got way too many kids. Yeah. And they gonna have the best advice. Oh yeah. They've done it all. They got so much experience to draw from. Now my youngest son, daddy, he lives. My middle two, they don't know him and my oldest... Right, they run the gamut. They know every scenario, right? Okay, now I can understand that. That is true. That's why I talked to him. That is true. I know a dude who got six baby mommas. Yeah? I know quite a few, they got more than that. Six, and he was just letting me know that his favorite one, the troublesome one, the neutral one. And that is so real. That is so real. There's a label, right? And the other thing that I've learned in this work too is a lot of the times women don't recognize their power. They act a lot of the times as kind of this victim in the scenario, instead of recognizing that we kind of run shit, or we have the ability to. Oh, I thought you was about to take some accountability. I was like, we done it. We done it. We found the one lady that's gonna hold herself accountable. I told you all that was cold. I bet you do. I was like, nope, we got the power. It ain't our fault. But no, I mean, literally, it's like you can dictate how that relationship will be, because men are defined to you a lot of the time. So if you recognize that power and you use it for the good of your children, it doesn't have to be complicated. And I think through coaching, a lot of people are able to recognize that. I think things could go a whole lot smoother. People learn some better words to talk to each other. That is very true. Better word selection. Yep. A little more patience. Patience, listen, really listen. Not listen to have a rebuttal, but listen to truly, and also not to understand all the time. You might not understand everything a person is saying, but to actually be able to reflect what they're saying is important. Yeah. But yeah, co-parenting is it. We've been talking about it a lot. It's a buzzword. We're talking more and more about what co-parenting is. And I think it's important that people recognize that there's ways to get support around it without avoiding it and then ending up at court. Are you a parent? I am. I have a 19-year-old. Just one? Yep, just one. Man, you're supposed to have a bunch of kids. Mm-mm. You ain't having no more? Nope, I'm done. I'm done. That is a big age gap, though. Yeah, it's over. 20 years. Come get you little brother, I can't. Nope, it's over with. It's over. Yeah. Well, I want to let you know that what you're doing for the community is great, and I hope you help everybody. I hope so, too. Because somebody's going to have to make some sense of all this. Yeah, yeah. And like you said, it's not complicated. It's all in about the choices. That's very true. And just to be heard, when we're in the coaching space, you're able to really sit with somebody and support them through what they're feeling, what they're thinking. It really, truly helps. And coaching, we're not there to diagnose you. So it's very different than what people think traditionally therapy is. It's an opportunity. Let me ask some hypothetical questions since I got you in here. What would you tell somebody who tends to co-parent with somebody who's just stupid, just flat out stupid, logical. You know, there's people who can't make logical decisions. They make emotional ones, but not logical ones. So we get that a lot. And what I like to tell people is sometimes co-parenting might not even be for you. And you need to recognize who you can co-parent with while you can. So your village is accessible. Sometimes we're forcing a circle into a square. Literally. Yeah. And you might need to parallel parent with that person. Sometimes there's domestic violence in play. Sometimes you've got an extreme narcissist that you just can't talk sense into that person. So instead of trying to force that situation, figure out who in your family can help you in a co-parenting dynamic and use resources. Absolutely. Absolutely. It's OK if you can't co-parent. You don't have to force that. But especially in the black community, it takes a village. And we know that. We understand that. There's always a grandma. There's aunts and uncles that are around. And people are willing to step up and support you with your children. And you just need to be mindful about saying, this is how I need you. But I don't recommend people try to co-parent with somebody who's stupid. It's a waste of time. It's a waste of time. It's a waste of energy. You said it's so much nicer than me. Oh, I knew you was going to put it right. Because when I say it, they get offended when I say it. Some people just stupid. Yeah. Well, we see it a lot. Yeah. We have any questions from the floor? Anybody need help co-parenting? Any co-parents in here today? Nobody? I'm the only one with a child today. All right. I see how it is. I told you I was somebody's baby daddy earlier. You're leading the pack. Hell, yeah. That's how we do it. Well, I'm going to take my cards. I can't wait to pass these out. And it's really a good tool, though. It really is. So you get the whole family together. And you give everybody like four cards. You get the whole family together, and you go through the deck one at a time. So the safety cards go to each person for their hand. And then you draw them one by one and read out what the question is. And then everybody goes around and answers. So say, for instance, you're looking at, how do we set bedtime for your child? And that's an issue. Or setting curfew could be an issue. When I created these cards, what we were trying to figure out in our family was allowing my son to fly by himself. How old was he? He was, I think, 16? Oh, hell yeah. He would have been flying by himself. And he was going off to Berkeley College of Music for the summer. Yeah, get him out of here. And I was like, we're trying to figure out who's going to ride on the plane with him one way and the other way. And he was like, I just want to go by myself. So we were both like, OK, let's talk this through. Let's figure it out. Are you ready to do that? And he did. And once we went through this process, because we weren't giving him a voice. Yeah, 16 when you black is really, you really 21. Don't tell him that, because he's 19 now. So how old is he? Everybody who's watching this show act like you haven't had some decent breakfast cooked by a six-year-old. You laugh because you know it's true. Black kids be advanced. I was one of them black kids. Exactly. I was one of them black kids. You've been cooking since you were five or six years old? I have. I have. See? That is true. So yeah, we sat as a family to work it through. And then I thought, well, the steps that we're taking to give him a voice, to have him be a part of the way we make decisions that relate to him. Other people should be doing the same thing. And the more that you involve your child, the more that you take your own feelings out of the equation. And that helps you to show up better as a co-parent. Are you listening? You might need to shuffle through these cars a little bit. There's some good ones in here too, bro. How might the decision hurt someone else, J.O.N. here? Yeah. Because we don't think about all of that kind of stuff. Sometimes, you know, we just repeat in what we've seen, which a lot of times is a lot of yelling, a lot of cussing. You couldn't get real petty on these cars. That's what I'm saying, like just to spice it up, your day to ugly is here. And that's going to make it complicated. Yeah. Just for a little razzle-dazzle. Well, that'll be the. Ask your mom about their birthday money. That's the family fun edition, where we're going to partner. Now, those would be funny, though. Ask your mama, can I have some of the J.O.N.s, boy, back? We've got to come out with the hood version. I like that. I like that. Yeah. Well, look, I appreciate you coming through here. I thank you for having me. Putting me up on some co-parenting game. Anybody could use that. Yes. What do you tell the step-parents? You know, I tell the step-parents to follow the lead of the biological parent. You know, like if you are with a parent who doesn't feel like they can advocate for themselves, that they can speak up. You still need to be kind of deferring to them and following their lead, because you're not the parent. Until you can build a relationship with their co-parent, you need to fall back, because it will definitely make it complicated. And it can defend the children that are involved, too. I got a book idea for you. Let's have it. I like to throw ideas at you. I love it. Do a book called Other People's Kids. Other People's Kids. I like that. To step-parent addition, yep. Other People's Kids. Other People's Kids. You need to do a whole chapter. Just shut your ass up. Chapter C, you all in new folks house. Because literally, I mean, I see so many step-parents that make things harder. See? Look, you don't roll the book. They make it harder. They do. Especially, I say this one, too. Especially, in my personal experience, the girlfriend who don't get along with her baby dad. Oh, they on sabotage. But they want so they want their boyfriend to not get along with his baby mom. Oh, that's a doozy. Yeah. Yeah. We see it all. They always be funny-looking, too, though. Tell the truth, it's always the most funny-looking one. It ain't never been. That is very true. It's always the funny-looking one. That is very true. In my experience, that is very true. Yeah. That's just how it go, though. Man falling in love with a lot of funny-looking ones. For real, we do. We always look at some of your older homeboys. You ever see a couple together, and you just look and be like, what the fuck did they like to do? What do they have in common doing like that? I be in Walmart. There's some strange couples in there. Strange-ass couples in there. Definitely. That's a whole other episode. They learn how to come co-parent, though. It's not complicated. Right. At least it don't have to be. Drop the website again. Yes. AlishaPrice.com or ThePriceDynamic.com. OK, and that's Alisha. That's A-L-Y-E-S-H-A. No. A-L-Y-S-H-A. No, that's S. Well, there you have it, folks. There you have it. Zoom in on it. It looked like an E to me. It's an S. Ain't no E in there. No E. See, you would have went to somebody else's website. Ain't no time. What would have popped up? J-O-N. The black market is open.