 Let's have real talk, cold, hard, get into it kind of talk, right? I mean the kind of talks that we've been trying to facilitate, right? This is African American History Month, but it's, I would say, a little bit bigger one than normal. And when I look back at my career, this should be one where, you know, we're stepping it up a notch, I guess I'll say. And so I was a little confused to go, what we need is that guy. So I'm dying for you as we have this real talk to help me understand why when you guys, as a committee looked up, you went, okay, you know, we could talk to lots of people out there in my mind, you know, who are inspiring African Americans and yet you won't have a conversation with me. I mean the first thing for me was my experience with you initially. So when we sat in a circle and the Wyvern Nation is listening, that was the first encounter. I did not know who you were at all just because I think you were out of quarantine at that point. So I didn't know like it was you because I wasn't really focused or paying attention on that. We were engaged in the dialogue and conversation. And I remember when I shared my story about my father's passing and having to drive, because I'm from Indiana and there's certain parts that we're still not welcomed in as African Americans. And so just being mindful of that having to drive to his burial in uniform, just in the event that I did get pulled over and then just other things that have transpired here at Aviano and seeing that you actually had the heart to listen and empathize and try to put yourself in other people's shoes. So when I talked to the president, Sergeant Adade over the African American Heritage Committee, I think we realized like it starts with the head like whoever's in charge who's in the leadership position, it starts with them and knowing that you want to be a part of the conversation and understand and then also learn more about our culture. That inspired me because I think back to instances in history. Of course our history didn't start with slavery, but when I think back to, I'll just go back to the slavery for this instance. When we talk about the slaves escaping, the oppression they were under, it wasn't just African Americans helping free them. There were people that did not look like them at all that were helping and also teaching them how to read and just I thought about that or sacrificing their homes when they had the underground railroad to get them out of bondage. So when I think about that and I think about your impact and what you could do for this wing and for the squadron commanders to get them to understand like we need to be inclusive and have these conversations. So and I knew that you weren't uncomfortable having the conversation. I get the luxury of working with a lot of amazing people and one of the folks that I work with here, incredibly talented single mom when I arrived she had a four year old I had a four year old they're both just now five. Two little boys, right they run, they play, they both like Iron Man. She described a conversation with her son and he said, Mommy, I don't want my skin. I see my son, I'm trying to imagine how I would feel if I was looking at my son thinking about what would be going through him, you know, without question heartbreaking at the time. To every person out there who stops for a minute and thinks, I get it. No, you don't. I don't get it. I'll tell you that right now. There's no way. There's no way when I talk to my child that I stop and I think about the world in front of them and how hard it's going to be. And this is just the tip of the iceberg. If my little boy looked at me and said, Daddy, I don't want my skin. I think one of the things as I was listening to you, I was just reflecting back on my childhood and how many times I felt that way. I didn't want my skin or my hair. And so that's why I said it's a lot of unlearning things and learning how to love yourself despite of maybe people in the world not loving you uniquely for who you are, right? So I wanted to ask you, as it relates to the conversations that we're having now, what would you say to people that are uncomfortable to have these conversations or the leaders across this wing? But you have to be brave. That's the first part that I would say. To truly care about people, which is at the very core of this. That's the bottom line, care. Care enough to be brave enough to have that conversation, to take your ego and put it down and just accept the fact that you don't know. You may form an opinion that's different than the one you have, you may not. Everybody comes in with their own biases and their own thoughts that are formulated from how they grew up, right? We just talked about it. You and I are shaped by the way we started. And I'm extremely thankful. I cannot thank my parents enough for speaking from a golden rule standpoint from the beginning. I don't care. I don't care where you come from. I don't care what you're, whether it's religion or ethics or otherwise. The basis of this all rests in the basic human condition to desire to be treated with care and to treat others with care. The same way that you would want to be treated regardless of their color of their skin, regardless of their gender. It doesn't matter what those separations may be. Treat people the way you would want to be treated. So that's the baseline piece. But I think when you can get to that and you can go, okay. So assume you don't know what you think you know. Put it down. Take your ego and put it down and then just go do what it takes to have the conversation. And it's going to be hard for sure. I've been told by, you know, individuals that look like me that said, you know, they've had leaders that don't really have the conversation, don't say anything to them about it, avoid it, or say like, you know, I don't see color, which is something I had to really reflect on because when I thought about that, I was like, well, to say you don't see color means you don't really see me because that's the first thing, honestly, that's noticed when someone walks in the room that's of another ethnicity. You see that because we can always talk about the negative things, right? Like what we go through, which it is a lot. It is a different world. It's two different worlds. And before I get to that, I'll just say this, like during the peaceful protest, my brother was out there, my older brother, he lives in Vincennes, Indiana. And I had him call me every day that he was out there doing that, just so I knew he was OK. And I had to go to work. And I felt rage as well. I went to work angry that no one else had this experience, that I was dealing with the, sorry. No, that's real. That I was dealing with that experience. And, but then I asked myself, OK, how can I be a change agent just for within my sphere of influence? Because I looked down at my chest and I'm like four little stripes, like what can I do? And I said, well, for Black History Month, I'm going to be adamant about let's have something to where we see the inventions and the things that were created because this nation was a lot of the things that were created by people that look like me. And when I just think about that and I research on it, I get so proud. I think you hit on something earlier that's really, really important when we think about what people do. Discussions versus books. If I stop and talk to you and we really talk, I can't just take the emotions and make them go away. Feel the emotions. Question what you think, what you believe. At least force yourself to explore it. And it's hard, but it's something that's required. It's got to be done. That it's not about how you look or whether you're a boy or a girl. It's about how you act. And importantly, Martin Luther King Jr. states that you do not be judged by the color of your skin, but by the conduct of your character. I think as African-Americans, we have a different struggle because we have to learn to unlearn learned behavior. I've had people that I'll be at the schoolhouse and they'll come over. And they'll look at everyone else and pan and then they won't look at me and go back the other way. I've seen things like that, I've dealt with it and it sucks because you feel like you're invisible in those moments. But to be seen for who you are and what you are capable of and your character. That's what my dad always said. That's what you need to be seen for and the right people will see it. So growing up knowing that no matter what I do, it wasn't enough. That's how I felt and I still feel like to this day, that's instilled in me and is still there, which is why I said trying to unlearn learned behavior because my parents always said, you have to be 10 times better than everyone else. You have to work harder. You have to have a harder drive and go, go, go because it is not going to be easy for you in this world. So that's what they used to tell my brother and I. But I know that learning about my culture was something my parents were both really passionate about and just embracing who I am naturally. Even at younger ages? Yes, sir. But I will just say, I felt like the oddball. I remember my first encounter. We went to a Christian school when my brother and I, when we were in elementary. And I think we were two of four black children in the school. And I just remember feeling like why, why do I get treated differently? And you did, you got treated differently. Absolutely, and sometimes it was subtle. When I started really getting into basketball, I wanted to play on this AAU team. There's a couple of my friends were on the team and I was the only black girl that tried out on this AAU team and I didn't make it. And I remember my father sitting down and having a conversation with me. And he was mad at them. He had the conversation and then I had to really learn to figure out how to love myself. So he started putting me in communities where I could see individuals that looked more like me, but they wanted us to go to the best schools. So unfortunately those schools were not in the inner city. So township schools is where we started out at. I remember when I joined the military, the first time I was ever told, because I'm really quiet, I think a lot. I don't smile a lot. I'm sure you've seen that. This is probably the most I've smiled. But I don't smile a lot. So being told you look angry, those things, they bother you because those are negative connotations that have always been associated, especially with African-Americans and particularly women. So saying I look angry and also saying I'm difficult because I don't really express my emotions well. So I had to have this conversation with someone recently, because in my community you're taught, like suppress your emotions. Like when my father passed, I suppressed a lot of that. And still I'm trying to talk about it now more. But going to seek counseling or therapy or just talking your household, it wasn't a thing growing up. My dad was a suppressor too. So there's a lot of cultural differences and then my hair. That's something that I think I've really learned to embrace. As I've been in the military, it was tough because I used to get relaxers. So it'd be straightened chemically. And it was because I wanted to fit into the standard of beauty that's surrounded us for centuries. And then I just had to learn I have to embrace who I am and be uniquely me regardless of whether people like it or not. Yeah, you highlighted the challenge with maybe the way you carry yourself, right, or whether you smile or don't smile. Because I don't know, right? There probably is something to that when you add in the color component. But that's definitely something that can affect anybody. And you have to process what's happening. I mean, did you process it right off the bat? Did you look at it and you're like, wait a minute, I'm better than they are. I mean, I don't know whether you were or not. I didn't. My father actually said that to me because they actually came out and told him. One of the coaches, he later told me they didn't want anyone of color on their team. And that was hard to take because I really wanted to play with him. Like I said, my friends were on the team because I had been in the environment of being around Caucasian people like growing up. So it was tough. I didn't look at it like... But why would you expect that, right? If you've spent your time with your parents telling you that, right? That it's about everybody, it's about how you act. And then you go into a scenario like that. Okay, well, I guess I didn't play well enough today or whatever. It would be very logical for you to have that perspective until you're confronted with it. I'm guessing that's the first time that you ran into that. It was. Was that the first time that your father had to have something that's in the vicinity of the talk? It wasn't. I got my license at 16. And I remember him telling me to keep everything up in the visor. So that way when... If I did get pulled over and I did a couple times being asked, like, what are you doing out here? Grappling for the first time with... This has been taken away from me because I looked different. Oh, absolutely. That was the first time for that. Absolutely. And it wasn't the last. I ended up playing on a team in Ohio. And we were playing basketball and we had a game and there were racial slurs that were thrown out. When I played basketball for Lawrence North High School before I transferred to Arlington, we went and played at Brownsburg and there were racial slurs being thrown out. And I think that's the thing is like we're always taught, like just turn the other cheek, don't do anything. It was tough. You know, when you talk about that experience as a nine-year-old, you definitely had experiences after that. But I expect that was seismic, volcanic, because it's probably the first time that you have to stop and look inside and ask yourself what's wrong with you. I ask that question often after that. I ask that often. Like, what's wrong with me? And it all starts right there, the first time. Wound deep, I think. I think, as you said, like being brave, it's on both sides, right? So people have to be brave enough to tell their stories. And I've had conversations with some African-Americans that are like, oh, it's not my job to educate. But how will people know? People learn more from our personal experiences than sometimes they will in a book. And so I've had to have that conversation. Yeah, so that's a... Thank you. No, I mean it for a few reasons. You know, the distinction you just made. I'll start by going, yep. And I can tell you, I've seen that, right? And for so many different reasons, even that very first listening session, we're not going to stop that. You know, it's funny you talk about some of the different things when we talk origins. Again, you know, probably a naive little kid for me. You know, when I studied history as a kid, when I was taught history, let's not pretend I didn't want to go to school like anybody else. You know, but melting pot is the discussion, right? That is the origin of America. That is the background. It's the melting pot. And it's, you know, I watched Saturday morning cartoons. And you know, and melting pot was one of the ones that you see, right? I might be dating myself here. But it was Schoolhouse Rocks. It was all about the melting pot. You said Schoolhouse Rocks? I used to watch that. Schoolhouse Rocks, one of them is on the melting pot. And it was, I remember it because it reinforced the things that my parents told me. And it's some of the most important seeds that will be planted will not be from somebody who looks like me. It will come from somebody who looks like you who has that willingness to speak. And what I can push on is to tell everybody who looks like me to be brave enough to listen. Thank you. That means a lot. Well, I appreciate your time. It means a lot to just be able to have this conversation to just be able to be vulnerable. I think that's something I have struggled with in the past, especially being security forces by trade and going over to ALS. But this conversation has, it's really like empowered me, the topic of race and, you know, being inclusive in work centers. It's been something that I've really been passionate about. And just people understanding that there's a beauty to seeing what's different about people instead of associating with something negative. So I appreciate it. Cheers.