 Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor podcast. I'm your host Rob Dyle. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so that you never miss another podcast episode. And if you're out there and you love this podcast, please do me a favor, give us a rating and review, however you listen to us, some more positive rating reviews that we get, the more that those platforms show this podcast to people who have never listened to it before. And the more that more people are able to find this and this podcast is able to grow and we're able to help more people. So if you would give us a rating and review, I would greatly appreciate it from the bottom of my heart. Today, we're going to be talking about your pain. And I'm actually going to teach you number one, why pain is a good thing. And number two, I'm also going to teach you how to actually use your pain and to listen to your pain to create the life that you want to. Okay. Because most people think that pain is a bad thing. When I say the word, if I were to go to somebody say, do you want some pain? Nobody's going to say yes, right? They're all going to say no. And so pain, when you feel pain, like if you, let's start about physical pain first, if you feel physical pain, that pain is just a message to your brain. It's a message that your brain is receiving to stop doing what you're doing, to make a change, to pay attention to the pain and to do something different. So I'll give you an example yesterday. I was trying to cook something. And for those of you guys that don't know, I am a absolute terrible cook. I don't cook anything well, but I was warming something up inside of the oven. And I had my little glove on and it was all cool. And I took it out and I was moving the thing around that I was supposed to move around. I wasn't paying attention and my thumb and my forefinger both went, the thing started to shift the pain that it was in. And I grabbed it with my thumb and forefinger real quick. And it was like, it was like a half of a second and immediately pain shot up through my fingers and into my arm and into my brain. And I was like, oh, shit, I can't believe that I just did that. Right? That's pain. And that is a message going from my fingertips to my brain saying, do something different. You need to take immediate action because there is pain right here. And if you don't change it, it will only become more painful. That makes sense, right? It makes a whole lot of sense. If you're sitting down and you're working for a long time, as a lot of us tend to do, and your back starts to ache and you're like, oh, my lower back. I think I need a back eotomy, right? Your back kind of hurts. What is that pain telling you? Your pain is telling you, dude, get up, move, get moving. You're not supposed to be sitting for so long. And so that's a message from your lower back to your brain. Do something different. Don't just stand here. Don't just stay here. Get up, move around, do something different. If, you know, you are walking and you're walking, you just got back from the beach and you're still at the beach, you're about to walk to your car, you're barefoot. Of course you're barefoot because you got sand on your feet, right? And you're walking back to your car at the beach and your feet, you get like 15 steps in and then immediately you're like, oh, shit. I didn't realize how hot this cement is and you feel pain at the bottom of your feet. And now you're in the middle of the parking lot. What is that pain telling you to do? It's telling you to get off of the parking lot. It's telling you to put your shoes back on. It's telling you to run to your car or to run back to the sand to do something different than you are currently doing. That's all pain is. Pain is a messenger for you to understand and stop doing what you're currently doing. But pain can also be besides just physical pain. As a human, we can experience many types of pain. We can experience emotional pain. We can experience a physical pain. We can experience sadness. We can experience worry, frustration, and you have to ask yourself your fear. If you have worry, pain, frustration, anxiety, what is that pain trying to tell you? Now you might be thinking, okay, if I have anxiety around something, it's telling me that I shouldn't do that thing. Oh no, no, no, not necessarily. It might be telling you that the way that you're viewing that thing is fearful and completely incorrect. You actually need to change the way that you're viewing that thing. But all of those worry, pain, frustration, anxiety are telling you in some sort of way to physically, mentally, emotionally stand up and get your ass moving to go in a different direction to do something different than you are currently doing. Stop doing what you've been doing and do it different. That's what the pain is trying to tell you do something different change because the same way that if I were to keep my fingers on that hot pan for longer, the longer that I hold it, the more pain I'm going to be in in the long run. Interesting, isn't it? So you start thinking about like, oh, I'm feeling pain, I'm feeling worry or sadness around my relationship. Maybe that's telling you to either do something different with the way you guys communicate with each other, the way you interact with each other, or maybe it's telling you, hey, it's actually time to do something different as far as like do something different with your relationship and get a new relationship or be by yourself. I don't know what it's telling you because I don't know your life circumstance, but all it's telling you is what is happening right now is not okay and it needs to change. And the longer that you do not change whatever you feel in that quote unquote pain around, the more painful it will end up being in the long run. It will only get worse if you prolong the pain. You just got to stop doing it. So are you getting the message? Are you getting the message of something needs to be different to stop doing what you're doing to make a move to do something completely different? It is in my opinion. This is the way that I see it. It is God or the universe or something that is out there telling you change change now or it's going to be more painful later. You've heard me if you've been listening to me long enough for the idea of the of the the the feather, the brick in the truck, right? It's like the universe speaks to you very quietly. It's like a whisper. It's like a little feather just tickling you in the back of the neck. You kind of feel it, but you have to be really paying attention to notice it, right? And I believe that all of us are getting messages about what we should and shouldn't be doing all day long. But the problem is we're just not quite enough to actually let those messages come through and to concentrate on those messages or you got the message to come through, but you're ignoring it because it's like, Oh, I don't know about that. That's that doesn't line up with my vision of what I'm supposed to be doing. And so you get the feather and the universal kind of speak to you that way. And it's a whisper and it's whisper. And then it gets a little bit louder if you don't listen for a while. You don't listen for a year or two years. Then it comes with a brick, you know, smack you upside the head with a brick. Then you pay an attention. And then if you don't pay attention, you're just still not listening, still not listening, still not listening. It's going to be a truck and it's going to run you over. And that's the point that you don't want to get to. And I learned this from one of my friends who told me about his father used to always say this and his father was it was a guy who was in jail for years and years and years came out of jail. And he said he could notice in his lifetime before he ever went to jail that it was like the feather, the brick, the truck. And he would start to, you know, got arrested when he was younger and got off or was in jail for just a few days when he somehow got off and then got a little bit worse and a little bit worse and worse. And he knew that what he was doing, he needed to do something differently, but he didn't do it differently. He continued to keep going. And then what happened, he got ran over by the, by the universe, the truck ran him over. He was in jail for like seven years. And so it's the example of are you listening to the messages that are coming through cause pain is a message. Inspiration is a message. Your energy, if you feel a lot of energy towards something is a message to follow that energy. Pain is a message. It's a message that where you are is not right. It's a message to what you're doing is not what you're supposed to be doing. And so many people feel the pain and they ignore it. They kind of, yeah, I know, but they, they have this job and they hate their job and, but they're like, yeah, but I mean, I went to school for accounting. I've been in accounting for seven years. What am I supposed to do? I'm 37 years old. I've been doing this for now for so long. I don't want to be doing this, but I'm kind of just stuck. And because of that, it gets more and more painful. It becomes harder and harder to get yourself up, get yourself dressed, get yourself to feel even good on the way to work and becomes more and more and more and more and more painful and stop listening to yourself. And so it's not just the physical pain that I'm speaking about, but it's also the emotional pain. When you think about your relationships, when you think about your friendships, you've got to start asking yourself what messages have I been getting that I'm just kind of ignoring that I'm not paying attention to. There's also intellectual pain, the pain of not living your purpose, the pain of working a job that you don't mind. I even hate your job, but it's just not fulfilling. It doesn't feel like the thing you're supposed to, but it's okay. It's pretty good actually jobs pretty good, but it just doesn't feel right. Oh, but I can pay my bills. Oh, but I've been doing this for so long. It's the pain of not not doing it's the pain of knowing that you're with the wrong person. That can be an emotional and an intellectual pain. It's the pain of knowing that you're wasting your life doing something that you don't want to be doing when you feel pulled somewhere else. And it's a small dull pain. It's not the worst pain in the world. It's not something that's completely going to debilitate you and you won't be able to at this point, not going to completely debilitate you, but it's something that gets a little bit louder and a little bit louder and a little more painful, a little more painful. And it's not just like one week, it's not painful. The next week, it's extremely painful. It's like slowly, but surely it starts to get more and more painful. I remember when I was, it just as an example, when I was working my last job that I worked before I left and started my own business and the podcast and all this stuff, I remember like I was making way more money than somebody at my age should have been making at that time. I wasn't working hard. I was working from home. So I was able to be at home and not work really hard and hang out with my dog and all this stuff. And I read a lot of books during the day, but I could feel the only way to describe it is I could feel my soul slowly starting to die. And it was, it wasn't like I woke up one day and then the next day was just way worse. It was like, it was like a best way to describe it in my head, the visual that I'm seeing. It was like, if you take one of those little cubes of salt and you put it inside of water and it just slowly dissolves, it was like all of me that my soul, my purpose was just slowly dissolving into this thing that I was waking up and doing every single day. That's an example of what I mean by it. And I think so many people like I don't people that are in their 60s that have been doing something that's been soul crushing for 40 years. And they're just numb. They're just numb to their job. They're numb to their family. They're numb to the world. They're numb to their own happiness. They're just numb because they have learned instead of actually feeling the pain and making a difference. I'm going to numb myself. I'm going to dull everything down because you can't dull down the lows, the pain and make the pain and numb that and not numb the highs as well. I believe under my opinion that the universe is always speaking to you. It's always coming through. It's always coming through. But the question is, are we allowing ourselves to be silent enough to get those messages to come through? Are we doing meditation? Are we sitting down with pen and paper and journaling through what we want our life to be? Are we trying to actually just be in some silence versus always, always, always being stimulated by something in this universe? Then you know, if you think about it with the example of the feather, the brick, the truck, you can think back to your life. I'm sure there's many of you out there listening that can think back to certain aspects of your life where you didn't listen and they got stronger and stronger and stronger. And then eventually you got hit by a truck or you got smacked in the face with the brick before you did something and it becomes, it can be very drastic, you know, your job. You can be fired from the job. So many people got that in 2020 fired from a job that they hated. And then they had this free time this time to kind of self explore and some people self explored and completely made a difference. But some people self explored and then just went right back to the same thing. It was your opportunity to make a change or you lose a loved one or you just wake up one day and you realize that you're completely unconscious in the life that you're living. Don't wait until you're either hit by a truck and definitely don't wait until you're definitely don't wait to me until you're hit by a brick and definitely don't wait until you get run over by the truck. And it's not something that the feeling of this is not something that should paralyze you when you feel the pain. It's not something to paralyze you make you stop. It is a message that you have to do something different. It's a message that maybe you should start thinking and listening and having some quiet time and being like what do I want in this life. And actually what's funny about is that most people actually it's not funny at all. Most people don't know what they want in their life. They haven't asked himself that question. And to ask himself that question becomes very tough because they're like I don't know the answer because I've never actually paid attention to what I want. I've always done what I thought I was supposed to do. I've always done what society told me to do what my parents told me to do. And so to ask himself that question is a little bit scary and to start to go through. And the beautiful thing about it is this is I've said this many times because I've gotten many emails of like Rob your podcast was so inspiring. I walked into my job and quit and I'm like shit that's great but also at the same time like I don't want you to be out on the streets. I want you to be smart about everything that you do. So if you do feel like there is a transition if you feel like you're getting messages that you've been you've been looking past the thing that I really want you to do more than anything else is to take a step back reflect journal through and say what am I being called to do. And if you are being called to like quit tomorrow. OK. If that's what feels right to you but what I would really like is for you to figure out some sort of way to transition out of what you're doing. If you feel called to leave your job can you transition out of it over time and be able to still pay your bills. And instead of leaving today leaving in a year or something like that. Same thing if you're in a relationship. If you're being called to leave the relationship now. OK. Do that. But if you've got kids if you've got a family if you've got a house you've got all this stuff maybe what it's requiring is for you to actually have an open conversation with the person that you're in a relationship with and maybe they're feeling the same way and maybe there is a transition to either transition out of the relationship or to transition the relationship in the way that both of you guys are showing up. So the real thing I want you to start asking yourself is are you getting messages in which I believe the answer is yes you're always getting messages but are you listening to those messages. Are you feeling a little bit of the pain a little bit of the worry a little bit of anxiety a little bit of frustration and you don't know what to do with it or where it's coming from. If so take a step back take a weekend off go to rent an Airbnb outside of town and just go there and sit in some silence and put your phone away in journal and think about what you want for your life and figure out the direction that you actually feel pulled to go to not the way that you've been pushing yourself to go but the direction you're feeling pulled towards because pain and those messages are always coming through just the same way that I burnt my two fingers yesterday. It was a message for me to do something different to stop doing what I'm doing. Anytime you're getting that pain coming through it is a message to do something different and to stop doing what you're doing. Ultimately you need to take the step back and figure out what the next best step is for you which you need to stop doing and then what you need to start doing in order to create the life that you want. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode please share it on your Instagram stories and tag me in it Rob Dial Jr. RBDIALJR. I love going through and seeing all of you guys. I don't share every single one of them but I do see every single one of them of where you guys are. I always love seeing screenshots or some of you guys are at the gym listening to it or some of you guys are on a walk listening to it or you listen to it with your kids. So if you would put up a picture or screenshot however you are listening to it and tag me in it Rob Dial Jr. I'd greatly appreciate it just so I could see what's going on in your lives and be able to connect you guys and I'm going to leave the same way I leave you every single episode. Make it your mission make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you and I hope that you have an amazing day.