 The Kraft Foods Company presents Harold Perry as the great Gilder Sleeves. The Gilder Sleeves is brought to you by the Kraft Foods Company makers of Par-K Margarine. Millions of women all over America serve Par-K because it tastes so good. And now in many states you can buy this delicious Par-K Margarine in yellow quarter pound sticks. Yes, the same spread that tastes so good now comes in handy quarter pound sticks already colored a rich golden yellow and ready to serve. That's Par-K, P-A-R-K-A-Y. Par-K Margarine made by Kraft. Everybody likes to know a millionaire. And the great Gilder Sleeves knows one. Gilder Sleeves hasn't seen his wealthy buddies since they were school charms together. Good old Benjamin Barton Clay. Of course I used to call him Benji, being one of his intimate friends. Is he the Benjamin Clay who owns all those radio stations out here? That's right, Marjorie. He's driving to... Hey, maybe he'll give me a job on the radio like a little beaver. Bad man with arrows. Oh, oh. Oh, my goodness. Young man, I don't want you pestering Mr. Clay while he's here. I want you to be on your best behavior. I always am. Yes. Oh, he didn't write, Marjorie. I read it in the paper and I wired and insisted that he stop in for dinner. Oh, that was nice. Judge Hooker and Mrs. Nickabocker will be here too. Mrs. Nickabocker? Sure. Won't do any harm to let a wealthy lady friend like Ellen know I have a wealthy friend like Benjamin. What's he like? Is he handsome? Handsome? Well, uh, Ben isn't exactly good-looking, my dear. In school, he never was as popular with the girls as, well, somebody I know. Who? Meely Roy. Oh. You mean with all that money, he still wasn't popular? Well, Ben was the kind of fellow that girls didn't seem to go for. He was awkward, couldn't dance, had big ears. What's wrong with big ears? Well, in his case, Leroy, they were too high off the ground. Ben was a tall, skinny boy. In fact, I used to call him string Ben. Oh, boy. All right, Leroy, you children better change for dinner. It's nearly six o'clock. Mr. Gilt, please. Yes, Bertie? That stove's acting up again. Oh? All I'm cooking on is two burners. Well, I'm sure you can manage, Bertie. I do the best I can, but all I'm cooking on is two burners. Yeah. Well, be sure the onion soup cooks long and slowly, Bertie. Yes, but that's one burner. Mm-hmm. And be sure the broccoli is nice and tender, Bertie. Yes, but that's the other burner. And don't forget your special hollandaise sauce. Yes, but all I'm cooking on is two burners. Well, I'll do the best you can and keep the mashed potatoes nice and hot. Yes, but I ain't cooking on six burners. I know, Bertie. I ain't cooking on four burners. I know that, too, Bertie, but... Mr. Gilt, so you know how many burners I'm cooking on? Yes, Bertie. That's why all I'm cooking on is six burners. Yes. At the time, I thought it was two. George had ought to boost my stock with Ellen. When she sees I have a circle of millionaire friends, too, she'll think I'm a millionaire. Never mind, Bertie, stick to your burners. I asked Ellen to come a little early. Welcome to the Prettiest Girl from Baltimore. Thank you, Gildy, but I'm not from Baltimore. I'm getting dark outside. Come on in, George. Wait a minute, Gildy. Here comes the Second Prettiest Girl from Baltimore across the street. Oh? Good evening, Mrs. Nicobacter. Good evening, George. Good evening, Mrs. Nicobacter. Well, hello, Ellen. Hello, Mr. Rotmorton. It's so nice of you to invite me. Well, I wanted you to meet my old friend, Benjamin Barton Clay. Come on in, Ellen. Thank you. Who is this Mr. Clay, Mr. Rotmorton? He's a man who owns a- You wouldn't know him, George. He's one of my circle of millionaire friends, Ellen. He owns a chain of radio stations. Oh? Yeah. He's radioactive. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Did you get it, Judge? Yeah. That's a lovely evening dress, Mrs. Nicobacter. Yes, indeed. You look beautiful, Ellen. Very springy. Yeah. I'm glad you like me. You bet. And Marjorie, will you show Mrs. Nicobacter where to put her coat? Of course. Thank you. Yeah. Hurry back, Ellen. Ta ta. Lovely. Yeah, there. Hmm? I appreciate the invitation to dinner, but just why do I have to wear this tuxedo? Well, I thought since I'm entertaining my old schoolboy millionaire friend, Benjamin Barton, please. Yeah, there. I can see through you. What? All you're trying to do is impress Mrs. Nicobacter. Now, Judge. Hi, Judge. Hello, Leroy. Hey, Uncle, look at the big black car pulling up in front of the house. Oh, must be Mr. Clay. Leroy, don't peek out of the window. Huh? Ellen. Marjorie, he's here. Excuse me, Judge. I'll go out and meet him. Okay, well. He...it is a big car. Probably has a radio station in the back end. A big fellow getting out of there, too. Doesn't look like the Ben I used to know. Uh, Mr. Clay? Yes? Uh, Mr. Gilderfield? Yes? Well, good old Ben Jay. Well, good old Rocky. Ben, I'd have recognized you anyway. I would have known you anywhere, too. Come on in. Let me take you back. Oh, no, that won't be necessary. I have to go on to Dexter after dinner. Say, you seem to have plenty of bags. Why don't you spend the weekend? Well, uh, thanks. But I have a deal on to that radio station. Oh, yeah. Well, come on in, Ben. I want you to meet some friends of mine. I want them to meet you. I didn't know you were going to dress for dinner. Well, don't be embarrassed. We dress several nights a week. Some weeks. Well, I hope you'll forgive my tweets. Oh, sure. Hey, Mr. Clay, I want you to meet Judge Horace Hooker, Summerfield's most distinguished barrister. Well... How do you do, Judge Hooker? Delighted to meet you, Mr. Clay. Thank you. And this is my little nephew, Leroy. How do you do, Leroy? Hi. He was a tall skinny guy with big ears. Me? Yeah. Well, thank you, son. Well, yes, he did. Just like Donald Wood. Well... You have changed, Ben. I was just explaining to Leroy that when we were boys together, Ben, I used to call you String Ben. Oh, that's right. And I used to call you Tubby. Yes, that's right. Well, by George, it's great to have you in the Summerfield, Benji. Oh, it's nice to be here. Yes. Remember the last time we... Well, here comes Ellen. Ellen? Rocky, you didn't tell me you were married. Married? And you're such a beautiful woman. Oh, no, no, no, Benji. She's just a friend from Baltimore. Hey, Mrs. Nickabocker, may I present Mr. Clay? Well, how do you do, Mr. Clay? How do you do? Oh, excuse me. I... I caught you two were married. Oh, no. I'm un-attached at present. Well... How about you, Ben? I suppose you're married by now. Uh, married? Why, nobody would have a tall, skinny millionaire like me. Hey, Rocky? Did it serve Miss Guilfrey? Oh, thank you, buddy. Well, let's all do into dinner. All right. Care to take my arm, Mrs. Nickabocker? But Baltimore, you say Mrs. Nickabocker? Yes. Well, we'll have a lot to talk about. Care to take my arm, Guilda? Oh, shut up, you old goat. Leroy, take your little sister to the movies. Thanks, Uncle Knight. Good night, everyone. Good night. Well, Guilda, I must say that Bertie came up with her usual splendid dinner. Yeah, pretty good. For two burners. Very wonderful. Yes, excellent cook you have, Rocky. Now, don't let her get away from you. No, I'm not going to. I'm not going to let anything else get away from you there. I think that I'll take my usual chair here for the fireplace. It's nobody mine. Fine, Judd. Ben, why don't you sit over there with the judge? Uh, thanks. But I think I'll sit here by Mrs. Nickabocker. Uh, it's nobody mine. Oh, no. Mr. Clay and I have been discussing the, uh, regatta. Bay shore. Oh, yeah. I'm, uh, I'm entering a new boat this year, Mrs. Nickabocker. I was going to name her Eloise. Oh, pretty name. That was my great aunt's name on my father's side, Eloise. Of course, I haven't painted the name on yet. Ben, remember the good old days when we were freshmen together? Oh, yes, yes. She's a trim 36 footer, Mrs. Nickabocker. Oh, I love sailing. Ben, how about that Halloween when we put the cow in the dean's office? Oh, oh, yes. About naming my boat, Mrs. Nickabocker. Oh, Ben. I might just christen her Eloise. Oh, wonderful. Oh, my goodness. Ben. Leave them alone, girl there. I'll talk to you. You will not. Ben, it's nearly nine o'clock. Didn't you say you had to be leaving for Dexter at nine? Because I don't want to rush you. Oh, do you have to leave so early? Well, I do have a deal on for that radio station. Yeah, and you don't want to miss any good deals. No, but, uh, Rocky, I haven't had a chance to talk to you about old time. No, you haven't. So I think I'll accept your kind invitation and say the weekend. The weekend? He and my big invitations. What time is your millionaire friend going to have breakfast this morning, Miss Gil, please? I don't know, Bertie. He came in pretty late. Took him a long time to take Mrs. Nickabocker across the street last night. Yes, sir. Want some more black coffee? Hmm. Hmm. I'll get it, Bessie. I'm closer. What a department. Commissioner Gillis leaves speaking. This is Ben. Did you phone for me? Oh, hello, Ben. Yes, I thought you'd like to come downtown and have lunch with me. It's nearly noon. Sorry, Rocky, but Mrs. Nickabocker and I are just having breakfast together. What? At your house. This is my house. I want you to come to our Jolly Boys Club meeting tonight. A group of professional men who get together every Saturday. Well, that's nice of you, Rocky, but I've always been a little shy about meeting new people. Shy, he says. Oh, why don't you go ahead to your meeting, and I'll call Ellen and take her dancing. No, he's calling her Ellen. Give me some cigars, Peevie. Yeah, well. And there's cigars for yourself or your wealthy house guest. There for me, Peevie. That's too bad. I've got one that's loaded. Loaded? You have? No, I couldn't do that. Well, I know just how you feel, Mr. Younger thing. No, you don't, Peevie. Yes, I do. I remember a fellow coming to town once and boldly taking a shine to the present, Mrs. Peevie. Who? She was going steady at the time, too. She was? And would you believe it? The Bounder married her. Married? Peevie. How could that happen? I was the Bounder. You were? Well, Peevie, this Bounder is carrying things too far. After all, he is my house guest. Yeah. Not only that, we were old school chums. Yeah. And no old school chum should try to take another old school chum's lady friend. I know I wouldn't. Well, no, I wouldn't care that. Well, I wouldn't. He can't leave town too soon to suit me. He's leaving town, you say? Leaving town tomorrow morning to buy that radio station in Dexter. And I'm going to help him pack his bag. Oh, there you are, Rocky. Hello, Ben. Your office said I'd find you here. Mr. Clay, I'd like you to meet an old friend of mine, Mr. Peevie. How do you do, Mr. Peevie? I'm glad to make your acquaintance, Mr. Clay. I've heard a lot of nice things about you. Just telling Peevie how sorry I am, you have to leave tomorrow. Oh, well, that's what I want to talk to you about, Rocky. Why should I go to Dexter? I'm going to buy the station here in Somerfield. What? Yes, I'll be around Somerfield for a long time. Congratulations, Rocky. Congratulations? Oh, yes. Let me buy you a cigar. Thank you. Peevie, give Mr. Clay that special cigar you were telling me about. Hey, Bertie, what's up? You look puzzled. Mr. Wall is fat and lee-roy. Why don't they put it on? Put on what, Bertie? All that food. He just finished a giant-sized dinner, and now he's in the kitchen eating bread and parking margarine. All boys are like that. Bertie, give them something they really like. They can always find room. Well, that lee-roy certainly can find room for anything that's topped by parquet, pancakes, rolls, muffins, waffles. That's because parquet margarine tastes so good, Bertie. It adds flavor to everything. You know how delicious parquet is on hot vegetables and in casserole dishes. I sure do, Mr. Wall. And so do millions of homemakers. They like parquet margarine because it's so economical, so nourishing, and mostly because it tastes so good. After all, parquet is the margarine of craft quality. It's made from only carefully selected products of American farms. Handy, too, because now, in most states, you can buy yellow quarter-pound sticks ready to serve. And it costs only about half as much as the most extensive spread. And that's a mighty good thing with lee-roy around. Don't worry about lee-roy. He's like millions of people. He loves that nourishing, economical parquet margarine because it tastes so good. Let him eat it. That's P-A-R-K-A-Y. Parquet margarine made by craft. Well, the great Gilder Sleeve invited his millionaire friend to Somerfield to impress Mrs. Ellen Nickerbocker. But the one most impressed was the millionaire. In fact, it looks like he's going to buy the local radio station and make Somerfield his home. Oh, poor Anki. Why don't you go to the office and stop worrying? Well, my work doesn't seem important anymore. Why? I was just figuring it out. If my water commissioner salary, do you know how long it would take me to become a millionaire? Oh, now, Anki. Saving $25 a month, it would take me $3,333 in a third year. Mr. Benjamin Barton Clay can have Ellen. It isn't worth it. Anki, money has nothing to do with love. Since when? Don't be silly. Mrs. Nickerbocker has plenty of money. She likes to be with Mr. Clay because he's entertaining. While you're moping around the house, he's out showing her a good time. Well, Marjorie... Mrs. Nickerbocker said just this morning she wished you'd spend more time with them. She did? Uh-huh. They're out playing golf right now. Why don't you join them? You mean hornin'? Oh, Marjorie, millionaires don't do things like that. Well, so what? You're no millionaire. See? That's right. I won't be for 3,000 years. Hello, Brady. It looks like Ellen and Ben putting on the A3. Look at them strut those knickers. Knickers for Mrs. Nickerbocker, I guess. Well, clothes don't make a golfer. Look at those skinny legs. I'll play circles around that bin. Well, hello there. Hello. Sorry, boy, we don't want a caddy. What? Holy kidding, Rocky. Why don't you join us for a few hold? Well, I just happened to have my clubs along. Wonderful, Throckmorton. Hey, I've missed you lately. Oh, well, I've missed you, too. Come on, Ellen, let's climb the hill and tee off. Come on, Throckmorton. Climb the... way up there? Yes. We walk up there and drive across the ravine. Oh, yes. Pretty steep. You didn't tell me you played golf. Throckmorton? Well, I haven't played for quite a while. But these things come easy for an athlete like me. I love sports. What do you shoot ordinarily? Well, ducks, quail, if you... Oh, you mean on the golf course. Well, I don't like to brag, Ben. Quite a climb. But isn't it beautiful up here? Oh, yes, beautiful. Think I'll sit down and enjoy it. Well, you tee off, Ellen. All right. Throckmorton, if you haven't played for quite a while, why don't you just walk around with us? Now, Ben, don't worry about me. I can defend myself on the golf course. She's driving. Beautiful drive, Ellen. Yeah, nice. Thank you. Well, guess I'm next. You're out of head. I bet he misses it. Zeke, look at that thing go. Now it's starting to come down. 300 yards. Good, Ben. Are your turns rocky? Oh, yes. I'll tee it up high. This driver's a little short since Leroy cut it off for hockey. Throckmorton. What? I guess the sun got my eyes. Here goes. Oh, I will, yeah. I won't miss again. Just practice swings. Far on this hole. Three. Well, that's three. You think I'll pick up my ball and go home? I'll be sore between the shoulder blades. Oh, don't worry, Commish. Little Floydie Munson studied this stuff in Barber College. I got the touch of a masseuse. You've got the touch of a moose. Hey, how'd you get the kink in your back, Commish? Stupid, over-reading water meters? Yes, Floydie. Hey, I'll bet you had a fight with your houseguests. If you must know, Floyd, we were playing golf with Mrs. Nickabocker. How'd you happen to meet this guy, Commish? Well, we went to college together. College didn't do you much good, did it, Commish? What do you mean, Floyd? You ain't even learned the fundamentals. Fundamental number one is you shouldn't trust a millionaire with your best girl. Now, Floyd... And living right in your own home, too. If I was you, I'd kick Mr. Gottrock's right out on his greenbacks. I wouldn't do any good, Floyd. He's gonna stay in Summerfield and buy the radio station. He's gonna buy the station here? What a sap. But you can't hear this local station across the railroad tracks. That's not the stations for, Floyd. Radio's improved since you won that set at bank night. Oh. What's your set got the mining cut? Tubes. I have got a couple missing. Say, Commish, why don't you tear some tubes out of your set so it sounds like mine? What? Then tune in your radio for them and blame it on the station. Floyd, I couldn't do a thing like that. I wouldn't dream of trying to deceive my house guest, my old school child. Well, look out at this way, Commish. The station ain't so hot. You'd really be doing the guy a favor. Well... Besides, you get him out of town and get your girlfriend back. Well, if I have a chance to do my old school child a favor, I should do it. At a boy, Commish. Probably I shouldn't be doing this, but all's fair and love and war. And brother, this is war. And honestly, how it sounds. It still sounds too good. I think I'll pull this wire loose. You can even lick a millionaire if you pull the right wire. Pull the wrong wire. That does it. Better turn it off before it explodes. That station is terrible. Nobody would buy it. Here comes play at the walk. I'll do all these parts. Better hide them behind the set. I've ruined the radio business. Hello there, Throcky. Well, Ben, come in. I just had a game of tennis with Alan. Oh, tennis now. Our game ended at six love. If you have a moment, Ben, I'd like to have a little talk with you. Fine, fine. What's on your mind, Throcky? I know you're a shrewd businessman, Ben, or you wouldn't be so successful. Well... Are you sure you want to buy the radio station here in Summerfield? We don't get very good reception at times, you know. I'd like to give you a little demonstration. Oh, forget it. What? I'm leaving tonight. I've decided not to buy the Summerfield station. You have? That's right. I'll admit, Throcky, that my chief interest in Summerfield is Alan Nickabock. Really? I never would have suspected that. I changed my mind about buying the radio station here when I found out she spends most of her time in Baltimore. Well, then you're leaving to buy that station in Dexter, after all. Oh, no. I'm going to buy one in Baltimore. Oh, for I give up. I don't like what it says either. But I'll be a good loser. I hope they'll both be very happy in Baltimore. Throckmorton. Hello, Ellen. Come in. No thanks. I haven't time. Just dropped in to congratulate you. Congratulate me? Yeah, I hear you're going back to Baltimore. Where did you hear that? Well, I heard it from Ben. Oh, but Throckmorton, did you hear it from me? You? But Ben said... I said I might go back. Throckmorton, your friend Mr. Clay is inclined to take too many things for granted. Well, he is inclined to take things. And I don't like to be told when I'm going to play golf, when I'm going to dance, even when I'm going to eat. I like to be asked for dates, Throckmorton. So, why don't you ask me? Me? I'm not doing anything tonight. Well, for... Ellen, how about a date tonight? I'd love it. Where we go? To Hogan Brothers. I have to buy a new radio. This leave will be back in just a minute. Have you heard the good news, ladies? In all states where laws permit, you can now get yellow parquet. Yes, parquet, the same delicious spread with a wonderful flavor, now comes in handy quarter-pound sticks already colored a rich golden yellow. You'll find yellow parquet costs a little more, largely because of the federal coloring tax. But it's a real saving for you in time and trouble. Try the new yellow parquet in quarter-pound sticks. Remember, where state laws permit, you can get this delicious spread, golden yellow, ready to serve. Of course, you can still buy white parquet at the low economy price. At P-A-R-K-A-Y, parquet margarine made by Kraft. Beautiful night, Ellen. Isn't it? I didn't think I'd be sitting on the porch swing with you tonight. You know, Throckmorton, I think I'm as relieved as you are that Ben is left town. Now, Ellen, Ben wasn't a bad fellow. We parted the best of friends. You shook my hand, wished me luck and said no hard feelings. Think I'll smoke this cigar you gave me. Yes, sir, I'll never forget good old Benji. What a dirty trick. That's the cigar I gave him. Good night, folks. Mary Lee Robb, Lillian Randolph, Earl Ross and Dick Legrand. This is John Wald, saying good night to the Kraft Food Company, makers of parquet margarine and the famous line of Kraft quality food products. Be sure to listen in next Wednesday and every Wednesday for the further adventures of the Great Gilder Sleeves. You'll like this pleasant, quick way of making leftovers more delicious. Just add a little Kraft prepared mustard and you add a lot of tang. Hidden flavors in boiled ham, sausage, most any meat pop right out. Every bite tastes better. Now you can get two kinds of Kraft mustard. 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