 Hello from Hollywood, this is C.P. McGregor speaking, and welcoming you to another performance of your War Department program, Proudly We Hail. Through the courtesy of the Hollywood Coordinating Committee, we present Mr. Joe E. Brown as the star of our play, The Big Stick, by Richard Hall, with music by Eddie Skravanik. Elmer Biggs, the plumber, led a pretty commonplace existence until that certain fateful afternoon. He came home from work, had dinner, and no sooner lay down on the couch than the telephone rang. Hey, boy! I'll get it! Yes? Hello, let me talk to Elmer Biggs. Elmer Biggs, you are addressing the same. Oh, yes, I'm on the team. You're the man up. Hey, you're not THE Joe Cronin, manager of the Boston Red Sox? That's right. Well, gee whiz, Mr. Cronin, gosh, it's nice of you to call. Hey, what's the matter? You're plumbing out a whack? Is there something I can fix for you? What's that? I mean, can I be some small service to you? Yes, you. Oh, sure, I know that. I've seen all your exhibition games. Well, only last week I was sitting on the third baseline, and you came so dug on close to me, I could see the trademark on your sweatshirt. Well... Yes? Yeah. I was one. I want to get a look at you. Can you make it? Can I make it? Can I? Oh, I should say I... Oh, shucks, Mr. Cronin. I just remembered I've got to install two kitchen sinks tomorrow. You've got to... What? I've got to install... Oh, but, gosh, that's all right. I'll ask Mr. Rosemead for the day off. I'll be there, Mr. Cronin. Just you relax. Don't worry about it. I'll be there. So you see, Mr. Rosemead, how much it means for me to have the day off. Uh-huh. You got somebody covering you on that two sink job, have you? Oh, sure, Mr. Rosemead. Right down to the washers. Good. Well, big, this may be a great opportunity for you. While you're a good plumber and the mainstay of our Rosemead Rockets, which I don't have to tell you, I wouldn't be the one to stand in your way. Go on out there. Don't worry about a thing here at the shop. And good luck. Oh, gee, thanks, Mr. Rosemead. You're the best borscha plumber ever had. Come on. Where's the life? Where's the ginger out here? Come on, pesky. Little pepper out there, Johnny. Hey, Joe, here he comes. Here comes my fine. Here, what, Joe? Now, my big's the guy I told you about. Is that him? Well, you never can tell by appearances. Well, here I am, Mr. Cronin. Hello, Mr. Baker. I made it. Hey, what's that get-out you're wearing? Oh, this? This is my Rosemead Rocket uniform. We sort of think they're the classiest in the league. Got everything on that except neon lights. Okay, bigs, you want to take your cuts up at the plate? Take them on what? You want a hit of you. Oh, oh, sure. How's your supply of baseballs, Mr. Cronin? My supply of what? Baseballs. I'm pretty hard on a horse hide when I take my full swing. Of course, I could use my half swing and keep them in the park. Oh, listen, you just get up there and take your cut any old way. Let me worry about the balls. All right, you brought it on yourself, Mr. Cronin. Hey, is this guy nuts, Dale? Is this a gang? Oh, you'll see. What position does he play? Second base, and he's another Bobby Dore. Good hitter, huh? I think he hit Major League pitching, as well as Williams. You're not married to this guy, are you? Hey, Boo, Ferris! Cut loose a few with this guy. And it's better, huh? You ought to keep his right foot off first base. You just wait. What'd I tell you? There's one right out of the park. Hey. And another. What'd I tell you? Can that baby hit? It looks like you got something, Dale. And another one over the fence. Maybe you'd better marry that guy after all, Dale. What's the matter with me today, Mr. Cronin? Dog, Gornan, I can't. Just can't seem to get loosened up. Nice going, Big. You certainly can't hit that potato when you take your full swing. Full swing? What are you talking about? I was only bunting. Hey, hey, don't you think you'd better get a kid with a motorcycle or shag-nose balls? And here's some local sports news with national significance. Former Biggs, formerly of the Rose Mead Rockets, has become the surprise rookie sensation of the training season. Playing in every game to date, Biggs is hitting a phenomenal 567 for the Boston Red Sox. Tonight, his former teammates are tendering him a farewell banquet before he heads east with the Red Sox, and all local dignitaries will be present. Thank you, thank you, Mr. Mayor. And now, as president of the Rose Mead Plumbing Company, as manager of the Rose Mead Rocket Baseball Team, but actually more as a fellow who has played a little ball in his own time, I'm proud to present Elmer Biggs with this token of our esteem. The Rose Mead Rockets will miss their mainstay, but if we can't have them, we're glad the Red Sox can. Elmer, good luck. Thank you, Mr. Rose Mead. Okay, I'll open her just a minute. Give me a chance. Gosh, I'm trying to. But I'm a jittery of the J-bird. Oh, to Elmer. We knew him when. Oh, gosh, fellas, you shouldn't have done it. A gold-plated suction cup. Play starring Joey Brown will continue immediately following the message from the Honorable Alice Arnold, governor of the state of Georgia. Governor Arnold said recently, America will require a larger peacetime army than in the past, and to many young men now being discharged, enlistment in the regular army offers many inducements and advantages. The benefits of the GI Bill of Rights now are open to every qualified young man who enlists in the new regular army before October 6th, 1946. These benefits include exceptional educational opportunities. These may amount to a full college course for a soldier serving a three-year enlistment. To carry out our commitments, to protect our nation, and to ensure world peace, we must have an efficient peacetime army equipped with the most modern and effective implements and staffed by representative young American. And now act true of our story, the big stick starring Joey Brown. Elmer Biggs led the Boston Red Sox into the first world series since 1918, enlisted, of course, by Williams, Ferris, Dorr, Houston, and DiMaggio. Elmer Thrills is a national hero in the morning of the first game of the world series. At the moment, Elmer and his wife Daisy are talking in their hotel room. Well, Lamy Poy, it's a big day. Aren't you kind of proud of me? Oh, yes, Elmer, but... There it is, right in the paper. Elmer Biggs, whose big bat put the Red Sox into the world series. Hey, I like that picture of me. Oh, you do look nice. Oh, but Elmer, you're not thinking of taking that offer from the motion pictures. Well, I don't know. Don't know where I could pick up a couple of hundred thousand dollars easier and get a chance to hit, too. But Elmer, money seems to mean nothing to you. Why, Lamy Poy, I thought you liked that ermine line bathrobe I gave you. Oh, I do. Course me a small fortune. Well, that's just it. Me and an ermine line bathrobe laid the set of Stilson wrenches. Where will we wind up? Lamy Poy, we've got to get some enjoyment out of life. Don't worry about money. Well, just look at these telegrams here with offers for the next season. The Paris parasites over in the French league. They want me. Ten thousand francs a game. The Calcutta Cardinals. Sixty thousand rupees. Hey, I wonder how much a rupee is. The Shanghai silk socks. A hundred thousand Shanghai dollars in all expenses. Including a pagoda that overlooks the home of Chiang Kai Chek. Well, are you considering any of those offers? I should say not. I'm staying with the red socks. Think I'm going to throw down my boss, Eddie Collins? No, that must be Joey Cronin. Said he was coming by. Well, hello, Joe. Hiya, Bambina. How you feeling? Oh, how do I feel? With my fingers. I guess you get it, don't you, Joe? Well, I hate to think what I'm going to do to those pictures out there this afternoon. That's the way to talk, babe. Won't you come in, Joe? No, thanks. I've got to get out to the park. I just wanted to ask you a couple of things. There's a big gang here for the game. Say they're friends of yours. They don't have seats. The fellow called was named Rose Mead. Oh, sure. That's the Rose Mead Rockets. It's well-guided, too. Give them a nice box on the first baseline, will you? Give them Jack Sharkey's box. Jack can come down and sit in a dugout with me. Whatever you say. Hey, and be sure and put pads on the seats, too. All right. There's one other thing, Elmer. You know, the president usually throws out the first ball to open the series. The White House called and wondered if you wouldn't autograph it. Personal favor for the president. Put my name on, huh? Oh, sure. Oh, Joe, when they take our picture, be sure and get the photographers over on my left side, will you? That's my best profile. Okay, babe. See you at the ballpark. You bet. Hey, Joe. Tell Harry to autograph one of those pictures for me, too, will you? Well, here we are, Lambie Pie. Uh-huh. We must be early. Not much of a crowd around the park. Hey, let's go in this gate over here. Well, what do you know about that? It's locked. Hey. Hey, hey. What's going on? I want to get into the park. Yeah, what for? What do you mean, what for? For the World Series. The World Series was over a week ago. What? You heard me. Now move along. Move along, nothing. I'm Elmer Biggs. I'm playing ball here today. Get away from that fence. Elmer. Elmer, don't climb that fence, Elmer. Elmer, you fall. Elmer. Elmer, wake up. What? What happened? You've fallen off the couch and the phone's been ringing and Mr. Rosemeade wants to talk to you. Rosemeade? Oh. Yes? Hello, Elmer. Yes, Mr. Rosemeade. Elmer, I want you to be sure to be at the game tonight. I'll borrow a uniform for you. Eddie, Pete, Bill and Mac can't make it, so you'll be playing. You won't be bad boy tonight, Elmer. Here's our play, The Big Stick, starring Joey Brown. One of our most brilliant military leaders during the war was General Jacob L. Devers, who is now commanding general of the United States Army Ground Forces and who is a message of vital importance for all of us. General Devers. The United States today, as the greatest nation in the world, is realizing the responsibilities of greatness. We are committed to our share in the complex problems of occupation, both in Europe and in the Pacific. Supervision of former enemy governments and the destruction of their war potentials will concern us indefinitely. The United Nations are firmly resolved to take whatever measures are necessary to ensure the peace re-bought in World War II. Our nation will supply a good portion of the force needed to put teeth into the United Nations' agreements. Aside from the occupation role and the commitments to the United Nations, we have the continental limits of the United States to safeguard. Coupled with this is the necessity of manning the outlining bases, which we must maintain. The major portion of the manpower to accomplish the four-fold mission, which I have just outlined as facing our military leaders today, will be trained by the Army Ground Forces. Our success in these vitally important matters depends on more than you're supplying the men we need. It depends on the active interests and upon the active support which you, as citizens, give to the tremendous undertaking of rebuilding America's new regular Army. Thank you, General Devers. And our thanks also to Mr. Joey Brown and Governor Arnold for appearing on this program. Proudly, we hail will come to you again over this station next week. Listen in.