 The Narcissist Last Trick You won't believe this. The Narcissist will engage in many cunning acts and schemes to deceive or outwit you, to deliberately cause you to believe something that is not true for their own personal gain, to give you a mistaken impression so that they can gain an advantage over you. They will devalue and degrade you. They will reduce your worth and importance and they will triangulate you with other people to make you question yourself, to make you believe that you're less than who you really are so that you begin to self-isolate because now you believe that you're not good enough for anyone or anything and you may also fear what the Narcissist might do to you just by this point you may realise that they want to keep you to yourself. They don't want you to interact with other people because they're very insecure which results in them becoming very envious, jealous and competitive where they're constantly trying to keep you down but then they're also trying to outdo you which is very contradictory behaviour and it doesn't really make any logical sense but this is how Narcissists see it, they have to level the playing field, they have to bring you down if they're going to be able to control you so they have to make you dislike yourself, they have to make you believe that you're no good for anyone so that you will stay to yourself and then you won't even try to interact with other people, they have to make you lose confidence in yourself and they will do this by targeting your self-esteem, by constantly insulting you and keeping you down because then they can be your only source of influence, they can maintain their authority and control over you and they can keep you to themselves as a little plaything, this toy that they treat as amusing but unimportant to other people, this object that they use for their pleasure and enjoyment, for their own advantage while they act like other people don't care about you and it's because of your innocence because although they may constantly blame you and make everything your fault, you actually can't do anything wrong in their eyes, there's nothing you could do that would actually make them want to walk away from you, you're innocent and pure, you're guiltless and blameless because you're not wicked, evil or corrupt, you don't show a willingness to act dishonestly in return for money or personal gain, you're straightforward and upfront, you're uncomplicated and easy to understand, you wear your heart on your sleeve and that's what drew them to you, that is the reason why they can't keep away from you for too long because they need that, they need your light, it replenishes them, it makes them feel alive which is why they want to isolate and control you because they don't want to have to share that with anyone else, they want to keep it all for themselves which is why they're so paranoid and hyper-vigilant, they're always going through your stuff, they're always checking your phone because they fear that you will share this innocence and purity with someone else and that is one of their greatest fears because they already know that they're corrupt and no good, they already know that they're only intended to harm you because they get off and harm innocent people, they get a rise out of it, it brings on pleasure and satisfaction because a lot of times you don't even realise what they're trying to do to you, you don't even see that they're bad, you assume that they're innocent just like you because we tend to project our qualities onto other people, we tend to see the best in them and they like that because even while they're abusing you they still want to be seen as good people but they also want to keep it to themselves, they want to maintain a code of silence so that they can maintain their false image which is why they tend to keep the abuse behind closed doors but there is another thing that they really enjoy and that is when they're able to find enablers, other people who will do their bidding, other people who they can control and these people may be just as sick and twisted as they are or they may be innocent as well but either way they're still willing to act on the narcissist's behalf which gives the narcissist a thrill, it makes them feel powerful and in control because they can live vicariously through these other people, they can experience it in their imagination rather than actually having to do it by themselves which is exactly what they will do, if you manage to find yourself confident, if you manage to start standing up for yourself and you may think the game is finally over but it's only just begun because they were only just beginning to have their fun with you so they're not ready for it to end, they may see that you're moving on and you're making friends, you're having a good time, you're beginning to establish your own sense of identity and individuality but they're not ready to let you go, they're still holding on because they want to keep your innocence all to themselves and believe it or not but they're still able to do that even while other people are involved and they can do that by living vicariously through other people by getting other people to act on their behalf, people who are just like them, people who are narcissistic, a successor or trainee, a descendant or beneficiary, someone who is built just like them, a person like that can act on the narcissist's behalf and the narcissist will still be able to participate in and enjoy your pain and misfortune, as if they were engaging it themselves because the other person's actions resonate with them, it's exactly what they would do if they were in that situation so they can still feed off your pain and suffering, they can still experience that through the actions of another person which is something you may not have even been aware of but this is exactly what is going on and it is why they actually don't mind you spending time with certain people because they're able to live vicariously through them as long as they do what they're told, as long as they act on the narcissist's behalf, it still regulates their emotions, it still makes them feel alive and they don't even need to be directly involved as long as they can watch it or they can be made aware of it, that's enough for them to get off on you, it's enough for them to feel satisfaction and pleasure at your expense and it's very effective for them but these are the people who are sharing the same feelings and actions with the narcissist, they feel the same emotions so they do the same things for each other, they work together as a team, they engage in mutual manipulation, deception and control and although you may not be aware of it, you're the glue that's holding them together and this is something that typically happens in narcissistic families but it can also happen in the workplace or in friendships or even in your community and it can be quite difficult for you to deal with, because there's so many of them, you'll be in a tagged right left and centre, they're coming in all directions and in a very quick and uncontrolled way when if it was just one person, you could understand that they have a very serious problem and you would likely assume that it's just them, they're crazy, they have a mental illness and it's the same thing even if you're dealing with two people, especially if they're teaming up but when it's a large group or an entire family, now it makes you question yourself, you start to feel like you're the problem because when you're in a situation like this you won't have much support, people won't be able to understand because a lot of people have difficulty believing that a group of people can be narcissistic and work together, but that's not true, we already know that it exists, this movie's about it where a bully might attack and intimidate one child in school and then the entire school turns against the child and signs with a bully, even though they all know that the bully is bad and wrong, when you're dealing with narcissists there will almost always be a group, it's not just going to be one person, it's almost always the victim who is by themselves, which is how they're able to be victimised, because there's no one there to protect or defend them, which is what creates this hood or hide mentality, where people are just their personal views to fit the group they're in, so it is possible for a narcissistic family or community to single out one individual for recognition and mistreatment, where they will create all kinds of problems for them and try to destroy them, which is why you need to stop associating with them, because that is the only way that you will be able to move on with your life, as long as you're around them you will always be a target, because you are the glue that holds them all together, they bond over your destruction, which is why they will fight to keep you as their target, because they're dysfunctional people, but for the first time in their lives, they're able to start working successfully together for a mutual purpose, because they found a common enemy and it's exciting for them, because now they congregate and harmonise socially by standing together against you, this mean evil person, this person who is opposing them, the one who caused all of the problems, because it's much easier for them to blame you than for them to go through all of their problems, because what they're actually doing is they're projecting their problems onto you, they're disowning these parts of themselves that they don't like and assigning them to you, so now they don't even have to criticize each other, they can come together and watch you, because now they have something to do, they have something to talk about and you may have witnessed them doing this to other people on many occasions, but you may have also been the one who wanted to go and talk to the person who was being targeted, because you're different, you're not like them and they know it, that's what made you the target in a different situation, your innocence and empathy is what makes you a target, it's because you care, they're not going to target someone who doesn't care, because that wouldn't do anything for them, it wouldn't give them feel, which is why no matter how loving and compassionate you are, it's not going to change how they treat you, because they're bonding over it, they're coming together so they're not going to let you ruin their moment, they're not going to let you come out as a good person, because they need you to be the bad guy, it's what holds them together, so there's only one thing you can do, you have to go no contact, because as long as you're around them it's only ever going to be a game, an illusion, a story that they've created inside their minds, you're never going to get anything real, they need this false narrative for them to function, because they can't accept that there is something seriously wrong with them, so the only thing you can do is leave, and when you do that they will begin to disentangle, they will begin to fall apart, they won't be talking to each other as much, they'll become cold and distant again, unless they can find another victim, because the cycle has to continue, it's the only way that they can function, they can't bond in a healthy environment, because there's nothing that would bring them together, they have no shared values or motivations, unless they're attacking another person, because it's too painful for them to be vulnerable, they have too many skeletons in the closet, they can't do it, which is why they have to talk about other people's lives in a cruel and unfair way, because they can't come together and be vulnerable as a group, they fear that they would be easily mentally hurt, influenced and attacked, because that's exactly what they've done to you, and the last thing they want is for the shoe to be on the other foot, they don't want to have to answer to you, because they already know that whatever you're meant to have done isn't a fraction of what they're responsible for, so if you ever had the opportunity to hold them accountable for their actions, they wouldn't have a leg to stand on, because they already know that it's them, they've known that all along, that's why they do what they do, so then at least they have a false sense of report, a basis of meaningful close and harmonious relationships, a sense of connection, even though they know it's not real, but they know that it can be real for you, they know that other people will still accept you, despite what they've said about you, which is why they're still trying to control you, because they already know you're not what they've made you out to be, but they're left to settle for something that isn't even real, because there is no way that someone could accept what they've done, they've engaged in reckless and careless behaviors without any accountability for a long period of time, which is inexcusable and they know it, and it's why they're never going to change, because they already know that if the shoe was any other foot, you would destroy them, you would tear them to pieces, so by default all they can do is be fake and disingenuous, because that's the only way that they're going to have any power in that situation, if they came clean and they kept nothing hidden and they fully confessed their mistakes and wrong doings, it would greatly outweigh anything that you've meant to have done, and they know it, which is why they're never going to do that, they're never going to change, they're going to continue doing the only thing that they can do, which is gaining power over you, because they're very insecure, they already know that what they're doing is bad, evil and immoral, which is why they have to hide everything that they've done and just focus on you, because that's the only way that they can survive emotionally, otherwise they would probably go insane, but when you look at it, they're already insane, they created a world that's not even grouting in reality, a world full of half-truths which are deliberately intended to mislead you, because by default that's all they can do to you, because they know that the real truth about them and what they've done is too difficult to bear, thank you for watching, if you found this video helpful please give it a thumbs up, share your thoughts in the comment section, hit the subscribe button to receive the notifications, if you would like to support the channel, you can donate at paypal.me slash narcsurvivor, you can book a one-on-one with me on my website, it's narcsurvivor.co.uk, thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon.