 Hi, I'm Matthew coast head dating coach and founder of commitment connection calm and in this video We're gonna talk about how to get over him You know, so when you go through a breakup It's important to get over a guy as quickly as you possibly can so that you can either Bounce back after your breakup and you know go and live your life or you know if you really want to get the guy back You can do that as well But it's either way it's it's very important to get over him as quickly as possible And there's kind of three main things that you need to do in order to get over a guy And the first thing is to get him out of your mind and so You know if you're constantly staying connected to him you still see him a lot It's gonna be so much more difficult To get over him so, you know one of the things that they found through a whole bunch of studies is that We connect to each other In a way that's almost like a drug, you know, we When we break up with somebody it's like we go through withdrawals kind of like a drug addiction and so you want to get through that phase as quickly as you possibly can and The way that you do that is by disconnecting from him completely, you know, stop talking to him, you know Take anything down that reminds you of him, you know disconnect from you know unfriend him on Facebook and you know all that other other stuff and do that For at least a couple months And that way that you can I mean if you have to contact them and you have to talk to him Because you have a child with him, you know be very respectful and you know and do what you need to do but you know try to Get him out of your mind as much as you possibly can the second thing to do is shift your focus and really a big part of Bouncing back after a breakup is regaining your sense of self What they say is when you're in a relationship with someone It's almost like the two of you become one identity. And so what happens during the breakup is It's almost like you lose a part of yourself And so what you want to do is regain that sense of self back as quickly as possible and the way that you do that is to stay engaged in passions and hobbies and things that don't involve him and you know hanging out with friends that you know and You know just building your life back up building something up that you can go to and be a part of That will fulfill your life and make you Regain your sense of self And so the last thing that you really need to do is forgive him and forgive yourself most of us are prisoners to other people Because we blame ourselves we blame other people and we trap ourselves in this prison of Resentment and we don't need to when you are resentful towards another when you blame them when you are angry at them you are Holding you are letting them hold you hostage and many times they don't even want to be a part of it So forgive them forgive yourself Open yourself to create an amazing life for yourself And the only way that you can do that is by forgiving and letting go and moving on You know if there are some really bad things that were done, you know In the relationship you there is emotional or physical abuse of some sort, you know, you don't have to Forget it, you know, but not forgiving Will only make you a prisoner to them And hold you hostage until you finally forgive. So forgiveness is a really powerful tool So that's it for this video if you want more information on how to attract mr. Right into a committed Lasting relationship make sure you go to my website at commitment connection calm and take my quiz I'm Matthew coast and I'll speak with you again soon