 The narcissist will not let you discard them. They will not let you reject them. They will not let you leave the relationship when you confront the narcissist on everything they've done to you. Or you tell them that you know they're a narcissist. It might make them mad, but they're not going to take any of that seriously. They're not going to see it as though they need to give you some space. Or that you need to go off on your own. If there's one thing a narcissist needs most, it's control. And when you start confronting them, it just tells them that you are escaping their control, which leads them to develop more influence and authority over you. They will hinder your progress by obstructing you. They will deliberately make it difficult for you to leave. They will do something to stop you from discarding them. You might end up having to go to court. Or they will try to get you thrown in jail. They will just call the police and say that you did something to them. They will make something up because you've already revealed your plans to them. You've told them what you're going to do. When you're leaving a narcissist, you need to do it in a way that is cautious and obtrusive and secretive to avoid detection. If you tell a narcissist that you're going to leave, they're not just going to let you go and move on with your life. They have to completely ruin you before they can let you move on. They have to destroy everything good about you so that you won't be good for anyone else after they're gone. Which is why there's no point confronting the narcissist. There's no point telling them about their behavior. They already know what they've done to you. If they cared about you, they would have changed their behavior a long time ago. Or they never would have done those things in the first place. So instead of confronting the narcissist, don't say anything. When you are planning to leave a narcissist, you need to work behind the scenes. You need to make a secret plan. You need to ensure that you're going to be okay on your own. And then you just go. You don't have to give them any notice. You are free so you can leave whenever you like. When you tell the narcissist what you're going to do, you're giving them an advance warning of something. And all they're going to do is figure out how they can lessen your effectiveness, power and ability in doing that. They might even start love-bombing you again. They will act like they're cooperating with you. But it's fake. They're just trying to regain their control over you. Which is why even if they do make some adjustments when you confront them, it's only to stop you from leaving them. It's not because they really care about you. It's just to make you tolerate and endure their behavior. But now you've made them aware that you want to leave. They know that you would like to be away from them. Which gives them the cue to start destroying you. Because they know it's only a matter of time until you go. They know that you've figured them out. They know that you want nothing to do with them. So now they have to find a replacement for you. While pretending like they're still interested in you. But really, they're just trying to delay the event of you leaving them. So that they can have more time to improve their position. Because they know that it's going to end. And when it does finally come to an end, that is when you will see their most impressive performance. Because they have to go out with a bang. They have to depart from the situation in a dramatic way. In a dramatic fashion, by doing something that will ruin your life. They will go to all of your friends and family. And make up stories about you. They will tell them anything that you said you didn't like about them. They will try to turn as many people as they can against you before they finally leave. They will even call the police on you and try to get you in trouble. They want you to be at the lowest possible level when they finally left you. They want you to be the most unhappy that you've ever been in your life. They want you to be unable to live the life that you want to live. They want to take away your freedom. That's what they will do if you try to discard them. They're not just going to accept that you don't want to be with them and then leave. Even if they have found someone else. That doesn't mean they're just going to leave you alone. It's not like that with Narcissus. Even when they find a new source, they will go out of their way to break you down. They will still try to destroy you. Do not underestimate the Narcissist. They can be very menacing and threatening if they don't get what they want. They can show a strong and unreasoning desire for revenge. You're not dealing with someone who is normal or rational. You're not dealing with someone who is sensible or reasonable. So if you try to discard the Narcissist, expect the worst, expect crazy irrational behaviour. They will do anything to put you through a difficult time. To put you through a stressful situation. They will try to cause as much disturbance and disruption in your life as possible. For you not wanting to be with them anymore. They will call the police. They will bring personal issues to your job. When you tell the Narcissist what you're going to do, you're just giving them the ability to be 10 steps ahead of you. You're just giving them an advantage over you. If you want to discard the Narcissist, just go. If you bring any information to them of their faults, they're just going to see it as though you're trying to hurt them. So they're going to hurt you. But if you just leave, they're not going to know what's going on. In most situations, if you are dealing with a Narcissist, you are the one who has to leave. Because even if they leave you, they're going to keep popping up in your life again. Narcissists can be very possessive and controlling. They will demand for you to always be theirs. And if you try to leave, they will become violent. They will physically attack you. Narcissists have no limitations. They can be very dangerous because they're not even attached to you anyway. You don't really mean anything to them. So they don't really care what happens to you. They don't want to see you live in a happy and fulfilling life without them. They don't want the best for you because they don't really love you. They were just using you. And when you're finally done, that is the moment where it will hit you. That is the moment where you will realize that they never really cared about you. Because if you really love someone, you will want the best for them. Even if they're not with you, but Narcissists don't love anything. If something comes up where they have to choose between their happiness or someone who they're supposed to love, they will put themselves first every time. Because people are just objects to the Narcissist. They see it as though we just exist to meet their needs. And when this object stops catering to their demands, they might not even tell you that something's wrong. Instead, they will secretly plot to destroy you. They will still spend time with you and act like they're having a good time. But then they will be doing all of these things behind your back. They will be talking to people about you. They will be trying to separate you from other people. They will be talking to the same people that they told you they didn't like. And they will even be friends with these people behind your back. Even your own family members, they will be spending time with them. Even though while they were with you, they said they didn't like them. They said they didn't want anything to do with them. But now they're having dinner with them. They're telling them everything you talked about with them. Until you just become this outsider. Even when you try to discard the Narcissist, they will still find a way to enmesh themselves into your life. They will still be around. They will be contacting your friends and family because they want to remain a part of your life. So then you have to discard anyone who has any connection to the Narcissist because they will twist the narrative. They will turn people against you while making people believe that they care about you. That's how they get people onto their side. And it still gives them supply because now they're around people who are close to you. It makes them feel like they have power over you by taking away your ability to remove them from your life. When the Narcissist finally does leave, it will only be when they found a new source of supply. And when they do that, they're going to put their new relationship in your face. They're going to use it to hurt you. They want to show you how quickly they've moved on. As though you never meant anything to them. As though you were the one who was holding on. You were the one who was attached to them while it was so easy for them to forget about you. It's all about shocking you. And when this happens, the best thing to do is to just leave them alone because all they're going to do is bait you into another argument. And make you feel like a bad person who did them wrong. But now they're so much happier without you. They're just going to turn everything against you. And say that you're the one who can't get over them. You can't leave them alone. Because that's what they tell everyone. They say to people that you can't get over them. And they don't know why you can't move on. When they are the ones who are not letting you move on. It's just another thing they will use to get you in trouble. They will call the police. They will tell everyone you're stalking them. When you're dealing with narcissists. It's very easy to become unexpectedly involved in an unpleasant situation. It's very easy to get caught up in something. It's very easy to get into trouble when they bait you into a conflict. They will have everyone thinking you're crazy. Because of the things they do to you. They know how to make people crazy. They play so many mind games. They engage in psychologically manipulative behaviour. Intended to discomfort you and gain an advantage over you. And then they sit back and call you crazy. They're always trying to keep you on edge. They're always trying to make you jealous. Don't feed into the narcissist game. They want to pull you out of your character. They want to provoke you to react to them. They plan this stuff out in advance. They're conditioning you. They're training you like an animal. To behave in a certain way or to accept certain circumstances. They want you to think anything that is not right or true. They want you to lose touch of reality. Unless they can use the truth that hurt you. But even then they're going to exaggerate it. To amplify the pain that it may cause you. They are expert manipulators. They play games every day. So they've had years of practice. Which is why as soon as you see them doing this. You have to leave. Because they're not going to change. As soon as someone does that. You need to recognise that they are not to be trusted. And you have to leave. Do not entertain their inappropriate behaviour. Whenever you feel confused. Whenever you feel like you're questioning someone's behaviour. That's a sign that you need to leave. Because if you're dealing with a person. Who is direct and rational. You're not going to be questioning anything. You're going to know where you are with them. When you feel confused about where you stand with someone. That is a sign that you are dealing with a narcissist. Thank you for watching. I hope this video resonates with you. Please like, comment, share and subscribe. If you would like to donate. My PayPal link is in the video description. Coaching inquiries. You can email me at coaching.narchsurvivor.uk. Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon.