 Do we really believe in that or is it just like we don't speak with each other and someone is speaking and people still speak. So what is their belief? What do you think? So what did he say? That means if a teacher is speaking and that student is speaking that means what your belief is what you have to tell him is more important than what the teacher is. This belief that I don't have to be wrong when my turn comes. So that when they speak wrong that the people will judge me. Fantastic. Fantastic. So what is actually required is if there is a behavior which is not good for the whole class. If this behavior is not good for the whole class. So the idea is we understand this is causing, this is being caused because of this behavior. And if I do not want the class to be disturbed, if I want to learn from others' mistakes then it's good to understand what my belief is. And who will change the beliefs? Me. No time management. And what has to be happening is there is too much to do. We waste our time and do not use it productively. Lazyness and lack of consistency. We believe that we have to accomplish a lot of work. We feel that our completion of the task is good whereas the completion of the lesson is not good. We believe that the task in hand is very, is very time consuming. We believe we won't get enough time to act well. So when it's a belief it will also become a reality and when it's a reality it will also become a reality. And it strengthens each other. And that's why we are not able to come out of it. But to as some extent or I would say to a very large extent, since we believe in that it happens. Every Wednesday during the energy project, there are two beliefs which we have stated in the high school which is fear of mistakes. The second one is people are getting neglected. A belief under that is people think that they are under fear of mistakes is people think they will always be wrong. A belief under that is whoever participates should be correct. A belief under that is we should never commit mistakes. And in people neglected the belief is people prefer more experienced people and people should always project a good image in front of themselves. Image of them. Committing mistake is bad. Is that a belief or is that a fact? It's a belief. It's both. See you have to always recognize it's both. Actually you can't call it a fact because mostly if you fail, then you know where mistakes actually are. Then you both fail again. So you can't say that you are making mistakes. You have to say it's good. See now what is important is is he speaking out of his experience or is he speaking out of someone telling you this? You see the difference. His parents have told him no, no, no, no, committing mistake is good, you learn. That is what his dad is saying but does he believe that? If that is his experience, what would be a fact for him? What would be a fact for him? What would he be looking forward to? Committing mistakes. Therefore he will learn more. You see that. Therefore the fact, the fact that this is a fact is very funny because what I believe becomes a fact. You see this here right now. You give yourself more opportunity to actually learn. Therefore if suppose he is there, he is found out to experience that when I commit a mistake I learn more. So he will look for more challenges. He will look for more risks in life. So he will take more risks. Why? Because he is not afraid of risks. Why? Because he has experienced that he learns more. So it's him. Versus another boy let's say him. He has experienced that when I commit a mistake I was reprimanded. I was punished. So what has he learned from that? What kind of mistakes. Don't make a mistake. Therefore he becomes less risk taking. And therefore in life if you don't take risks you don't do great things. All great things, great things. You have to take small and big risks. So therefore he won't be able to take risks. And what is the reason for that? Because he didn't commit mistakes. So he didn't know that from committing mistakes he learns. So that's why he didn't take risks in his life. Right. Suppose in a particular community or society they all start giving like him that all mistakes are opportunities for the viewer. What will be a structure in that, let's say ideally some hypothetical program there is a school where teachers, students they even start giving that aid. Mistakes are good and healthy. What is that one structure? Now we are introducing the word structure. So what is that one rule which you will not see in that? What do you think? Then you cannot be any punishment. Fantastic. There will be no rules of punishment. But one closure, I was wrong. That's why if we do that, there won't be any punishment. There won't be any punishment and people will get to learn more. There will be a lot of fear of committing mistakes and therefore he can go in both the tracks. He can go in carelessness. Fantastic. Fantastic. Fantastic. He can go into carelessness. If people are fear of the mistakes, then only they will do the work. Like if we have to see the results. Yeah, that's a beautiful effect. It's both actually. Can we believe that? Very nice. So very nice. When the fear of punishment goes away, now we have a huge risk. Because now there is no punishment. So we could completely go off or we could completely become learners. Right? So if we have a structure where any mistake, it is not that mistake is forgotten or mistake is not talked about. In fact, in such a school, any mistake will become a topic of discussion. Okay, he has committed a mistake. So really, let's see what are the beliefs. What are we all learning about that we say? So we all learn. If suppose that is the process, that's a structure, then what is likely to happen? We will all learn. We will all learn. This is not good for all. Not because of the truth, not because of the punishment, not out of fear, but out of understanding. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. This is the topic. The issue we are facing is conflicts with parents. So we have noticed that it has been occurring frequently. And we saw that we think that we are mature enough. And they think we are too young to take decisions. And we think that we want to be independent and we are old enough to take our own decisions. So the beliefs below that are we want to experience everything ourselves. Parents are concerned about us. We think we are grown up to take the decisions. And there's a huge generation gap between parents and us. So that's why there is a conflict between our thoughts. To add to the thoughts for instance, we feel that we are right because it's the age in which we are growing. So we feel that we are right. But the parents have gone through this age and they think that they are right. They are too smart to take the decisions. They are not right to be a parent. What is the belief below this? Just what you said. What is the belief? Because that one of us has to be right and the other obviously has to be wrong. Is that the belief? Because only one can be right. Is that the belief? They also believe the same believer. That is why there is a conflict. Parents also believe that out of the two only one can be right. And obviously I will be right. If one has to be right then it's me. But is it possible that both believes below that there is one more belief that both are right and both are wrong? Suppose the parents start believing that both will be right and both will be wrong and the children also start believing that both will be right, both will be wrong. Then what happens? Is there a conflict? Then there will be no conflict. So do you see the gap in the beliefs? One says that if a human starts believing that the conflict may not end but can you open to more ideas? Fantastic. There is an opening for conversation. There is an opening for talking. Why there is no opening? How many kids, how many teenagers are not able to speak freely with parents? How many? Almost all. And how many parents you ask parents? How many of them are able to compare their ideas to children? Very few. What is the reason? Beliefs. What are their beliefs? I am right, you are wrong. And children's belief is also I am right here. Some of them are too much. They don't always tell us the entire thing. It's not something which happened to me but I have been noticing it. And they don't tell us the entire thing. You have to do this, you have to do it. Why not? And what is the belief below that? Children that we are, why do we have to understand? They don't need to understand whatever because when I had to... Why should I tell them? That's the belief. It's a belief below that. What do you think? As a parent what I would say is that much children don't know anything. We need to be right about that. But frankly, we are the parents. We all have children. Ultimately we get more. That also? Yes, that also. But doesn't it, at the end again, to one point that they have a distance Yes? It's always been me who have to tell my children. That is there, but it doesn't help day-to-day. If a parent is concerned that I go but if they are not telling me if I leave, that's for good. It's not the thing to the children because they think that they are not in the age to understand. But at least they can say this that I believe you will not be able to understand because that's your age. Can they say that? No. Sir, please. Yeah. You can find out together, right? Of course children do this. We always talk at the time. I ask him why not? So at the end when he tells me I do see the logic. But still at times it happens that even if he is right, I don't know. I can't do it. Correct. But there is a belief. If you next time are equal to have a communication that I still believe, my belief is like this, what is your view behind what you say? So now this brings us to a nice story. So real life. So we were teaching systems thinking in a school called Bhojali School. And then those kids like you and you go to school and you kind of insist that now you teach this to a parent. So we conducted a workshop for parents. And after that workshop, one parent came and said, oh, you know, after the workshop, few days, he got here. He said this whole thing has so far done big problems. So I said, what he said, you know, we stay in Manga in the road. And they stay on this side of the road. And his little son, I think five, six years old, he has a friend on the other side of the road. So he would always tell him that I want to go and I want to bicycle with my friend. Because they had a bigger room. And he would refuse. He would say, I want to go. And his son would get very irritated at that time. And I would not allow him to do bicycles with my friend who lives on the other side. And this kept on for years. And the son was absolutely annoyed. So when the father came from the workshop, so they learned this art of asking, what's your name? Right? So this son also learned. And he was a total descendant. So when the son asked his father, what is the week? Why you are not allowing me to play? Then the father told that child that he is afraid that if we cross the road, then some vehicle might hit you or something might happen. So he said, that's why I am not allowing him. And he said, he is not allowing me. And the son said, this is the problem. You shouldn't go near him. What we do is put the bicycle in your car, and you drive me across the road. And drop me. That is the road we follow.