 and as much death as I've dealt with in my life as up as it is is prepped me for the process of death and being an asset to those who are dealing with it. You know what I mean? Like Fly lost the mother of his children. I lost my father at the same age that his daughter is right now, his middle child. So just being able to offer him a perspective from that vantage point is how it affected me. I got another question for you. So when DC lost his wife, just like I said that everything that we go through, we go through it for a reason. It's not always for that specific person because I've always said this. I don't know if you've ever heard me say this but I always believe since I got older, this is how I look on death. When we're born in this world, God clock us in at this job called world. And once we do our job, he clocks us out. And the job is not always for ourselves. It's to touch everybody around because people always say, how is that possible? You have a child that's just been born. What kind of job did they do? I was like, they did a job in that person's stomach. You don't know how much people that child touched even not being born. But the mother could have changed her life. Probably was on drugs before or probably was gonna commit suicide or probably was just so many different scenarios. And because of that child, that person changed a nurse seeing what the mom went through could have changed their life. You, we don't know. There's so many different scenarios. So, but seeing what had happened, that situation, how did that change or how did that affect your life? Well, for me, it made me appreciate who I am as a person because like I said, I look at the bright side of bullshit and as much death as I've dealt with in my life as fucked up as it is, it's prepped me for the process of death and being an asset to those who are dealing with it. You know what I mean? Like Fly lost the mother of his children. I lost my father at the same age that his daughter is right now, his middle child. So just being able to offer him a perspective from that vantage point is how it affected me. Being able to say, you know, this is when it started to resonate with me or this is when I really realized it, you know what I'm saying? And just being able to be an asset for him as me and Lois and everybody that was around in that time was just to be able to be an asset. That's the way it affected my life and being able to help me recognize how useful I am in the pain that I've went through. Even though it was painful for me to go through, it gave me an experience that I can give to my brother to help him through because he, you know, did the same thing for me with my mama dad. Like that shit fucked me up. My mama died from COVID out of nowhere. She told me she had COVID on April 17th. She was dead on May 4th. So it was like, you know what I mean? He stood and him and Lois stood at my mama's casket and was like, man, I got you. No matter what I got you, we got you brother forever. And we did the same thing. So it was just, you know, it prepares you as unfortunate as death is, is guaranteed to all of us. We all have a date. We just don't know when it is. So in the process, you have to be an asset to those around you and helping them grieve because, you know, the grieving process is the process, like he said, that never ends. It doesn't go anywhere. So if you can be an asset to help people around you get through that process, that's the way it affected me. It hurt me to see my brother hurting, but it also made me feel good to be able to know that he can reach out and say, bro, I'm going through this and I got some type of answer for him. You know what I mean? And that's really what we do for each other. It's so crazy that you said, you know, you, I know that God prepares us for a lot. That's why you go through all of those, seeing all of that previously help you now. But I remember when I was younger, a teenager, I remember in one year, I probably went through probably about, and these are not extremely close. You were like, actually friends my age. I want to say about six deaths in almost a year. And being in that community, you know, when you go to a funeral, is like, you see the same faces, everybody, the same person that's going to cry over that one, going to cry over and throw a body over the same one and all of that. And after that, I think I could never look on, when I ask him, when I go to a funeral now, and everybody's going up to view the body, I'm sitting at the back of the church. I cannot look at another dead body at all. Even my own father, when he passed, I was sitting over the corner of the pew, and I couldn't even look on my dad. I couldn't, because- But that's your process. And that's okay, you know what I mean? You find that process in dealing with it as much as you have, you know what I mean? If you hadn't had dealt with it as much, then you wouldn't know, and you might've been in the casket with your daddy. You know what I'm saying? Like for me, you know, my uncle Reggie, God rest his soul, was like my father. And he got murdered as well in 2002. And that one is the, you know, that pivotal point for me that got me to where I'm sitting here now, because had he not passed away, I would've still wanted to be in the streets the way I wanted to be in the streets. And I've been blessed to always be good or whatever it is I chose to do. But once he died, it- Open jazz. I mean, it was like, because this nigga was a superhero to me, especially in the environment that I come from. I told you DC is different. We respect different things. And the things that we respect, he was all of them. And when I saw that it could happen to him, I was like, oh my God, like I'm real enough to know I'm not a sucker, but I'm also small enough to know I'm not a gorilla. And this was a gorilla, you know what I mean? So I was like, man, hell nah. And, you know, I did my mother's eulogy at her funeral. And I did my uncle Reggie's eulogy as well at 15 years old, you know what I'm saying? 14, 15 years old. So it was like, I realized when he passed, that death was something that was guaranteed that made me change my perspective on religion. That made me change my perspective on the streets. That made me change my perspective on everything that I thought I knew prior to that point because I had never felt nothing like that before. Like I watched him die, watched my mother pass away, but I never felt that type of pain. And it wasn't even the pain that was the worst part. It was the confusion. Like what the fuck am I supposed to do with this shit? I didn't know where to put it. I didn't know who to go to with it. Like I said, my mother was a soldier. She was devastated. So I couldn't go to the person that I would get the answers from. It was like, what am I supposed to do? And in that time that I had to retreat into my own thoughts, is what made me start to create the bubble that I live in now. Because I say this all the time, the world is gonna spend when you die, when you die, when he die, when he die, when I die. But my world and your world is your responsibility. And you gotta take the time to be able to start to create your world because the world is gonna give you enough shit to be worried about it you don't have no control over. But you gotta have total control of everything that you do have control of. Wow, man, it's something else, man. Like I said, it's something when you figure it out, seem like you learned how to cope. Yeah, it's the mechanisms, man. Like that's why I'm so dedicated to my process because I understand it works. I've had to, you know, it's like, everybody say what they gonna do until it, you know, I say all the time, everybody a gangster tell it, kick off. You better know it. Everybody a gangster tell it, kick off. But I'm able to be around you and feel your energy and look and be like, nigga, you gonna run. You gonna run on me, I can tell because of the way you talk, the way you act, the way you do, you know what I mean? Cause you ain't never had to be through it to be able to know. Like, whenever I see somebody say in situations when you watching the video or something like that happen, man, if that was me, I would have let me know who you is because if you'd have never been in those type of scenarios, you know, there ain't no way you can know exactly what you gonna do. You can know what you not gonna do. Like, I'm not gonna run, but what I'm gonna do in the process, you have no idea, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, we on boss talk one-on-one, one-on-one. Yeah, we gonna talk.