 Welcome everybody to unfiltered. Thank you for joining us. Thank you for tuning in. Welcome, Pastor David Thank you for being with us this afternoon and I love it and yes, and you know what? It's already Thursday in the weeks gone by so quickly Pastor, you know one of the questions I have been thinking about you know in today's society with everything almost being so instant and quick and Maybe even have it your way type of mentality There seems to be the loss within people the loss of forming relationships and that can go across the board from friendships to To any type of relationship, but the relationship I'd like to ask you about is the relationship That's romantic and instead of developing a relationship in today's world It just seems that couples are really quick to want to quote-unquote shack up with one another or move in or to develop the not even develop this relationship And I wanted to get your thoughts on on that what's the big rush and Why is it that? People don't see the value in developing the relationship that would ultimately lead to possible marriage You know, it seems to me exactly what you're saying that there is a Rush to intimacy. I believe that when you don't have emotional intimacy That very often what you'll do is replace it with physical intimacy and they equate the physical with the emotional And in doing so they've removed romance from the relationship, you know romance is a very important element. I think of Developing from friends to those who want to get married there needs to be a certain element of attraction that Places a high value on the person that you're attracted to and In a Christian's life that value ought to be expressed Through the way you cherish and the way you care for and the way you try to Help them to become the best person they can be When you move from an attraction that's physical and many relationships If not a large percentage will begin first with a physical attraction and we know that I mean that's been demonstrated through various surveys and means over the years. I mean a man will see a woman and within Less than a minute. He knows who they actually almost instantly sometimes whether he's attracted to her or not So we have that physical attraction But you know when we speak to that woman perhaps she doesn't connect with us on an intellectual or spiritual level And and so the attraction is just physical without anything else going along with that And so I think what has happened and and I've seen it to be true is that we have replaced a An interest and sometimes a physical interest. We have replaced that that Emotional interest with a physical interest and especially as Christian our spiritual interest ought to be the first and foremost Part of that relationship now there are those who would say well, yeah, that's just an old man talking What do you know and what I know is that in my own case with my my girlfriend who became my wife That's what the Lord taught me in terms of The intimacies and the levels and kinds of it Because I had prayed and I had asked the Lord that he would help me To go to sleep to my desires the way that he put Adam to sleep I asked the Lord would you please put me to sleep to my desires and Lordy in your time, I would ask that you would you would like you brought Eve to Adam you would you would bring a girl to me and I didn't think that was an unreasonable prayer, you know, maybe for some they would think it to be for me I didn't because I was aware of my own heart. I was a mere aware of the things that That attracted me that very often were were the wrong kinds of things, you know, and so that's what I did and within a short while is when I I met the the young lady who became my wife and and When I met Marie I was not on a physical plane Drawn to her as much as on an emotional plane she was somebody that I liked she was somebody that that That I felt comfortable with somebody that I could speak to somebody who Who actually seemed to care about what I thought and how I felt and there were things like that That became part of our initial relationship Ultimately obviously I began to see her through the eyes of a man looking at a woman and I began to be attracted to her From the the beauty that my wife had and still does But I was blessed in the Lord To begin a relationship with her based on the things that mattered and the things that last and Those things are are the spiritual the number one is does she love the same God that I love? Does she does she enjoy fellowship does she does she? Enjoy worshiping God does she enjoy a community of believers does she Does she want to have other people know who Jesus is those things all mattered and they still do John They still matter to me and to my girlfriend who became my wife of all these years now and so people are moving into Sexual intimacy The the word of God says that those who fornicate will not inherit the kingdom of God and he goes on to say and do not be deceived and So you can be deceived into thinking that Shacking up with somebody living with somebody having physical intimacy with some somebody is just like test driving You know a vehicle and what you're doing is you're putting your lust in front of what real love is Because as I was sharing just last night in our Bible study, you know the element of Love that God has commanded husbands to have to the wives is when Paul said in Ephesians 5 That husbands are to love their wives and the way that Christ loved the church And so all you need to do is you know that he was sacrificial, but I shared last night in John 13 It says Jesus Jesus loved his man. He loved them to the end What was love? Well in John 13 when it says he loved him to the end knowing that it was his hour had come How did he love them to the end? What is it that that shows me the love that a husband is to have for a wife? Well, we know that he laid his life down for the church Bible makes it clear That's how God demonstrated his love toward us and that while we were yet sin as Christ died for us So we know that the element of of sacrifice But we also know that There's an element of service because he washed the feet of his disciples and so how did ultimate power? He knew that that he had received all of the right. How does ultimate power act? ultimate power acted Out by washing the feet. That's amazing all of the all authority It was he was the first thing he does is he knew it and that's amazing You know, I that's interesting you say that pastor because in the in today's world everything's so quick And and I like what you said that sometimes in this there's no development of relationship It's just like this test-driving type of mentality and sometimes that when I'm people are coming in for premarital or There are those who want to get married. I'll ask them if physical intimacy was removed from your relationship How would you express you would love one another and they don't know how to answer that sometimes because They don't understand that the development as you mentioned, you know with you and Marie that the Lord put that to sleep And as you guys developed the relationship and you develop getting to know each other Then there was a time that the Lord awoke in you to that and and then you saw well behold woman, right? and and you burst out into a song because You we see the the attraction, but there's a part that we have to how allow the Holy Spirit to do in our lives and To that so I really appreciate that because in today's society. Let's just see what happens Let's do this first and they're missing out the really important piece of the relationship Well, American life is built on a variety of things. Obviously you have the you have the emotional, you know My wife actually meets the emotional needs that a human being should be able to meet in my life She does there's obviously the this the physical, you know My wife has you know been my my my sweetheart for a long time. We have beautiful children together and all there's that There's this obvious physical attraction, but it's been the spiritual John that has kept Marie and me It's it's the desire to do things that are proper and right before the eyes of the Lord and those things develop over time You know, but but they do develop if you're seeking God together And so, you know, there's too many studies that that have been done I remember when I was in college and I was looking up elements that that create a Marriage relationship that will last and then it was always included within that was always the spiritual always You know, it's it's unusual even in our day for someone to marry somebody else That they don't connect on a spiritual plane with but when you have somebody That is spiritually attuned to you and you together can worship the same God That that creates that three-fold cord that isn't easily broken And so when you put the physical in front of the spiritual emotional when you substitute physical because the physical is is something that is can be filled with passion and and instant gratification and all of that But you know what what causes you to know what love is is is much beyond that It's it's the yielding of yourself to the wishes of somebody else so that they can benefit Even at what may be a cost to you It's it's the encouragement of that person to walk right with God to love his word to to pray together And and the variety of things that you do attend church together and and serve God together all of those things are what kept Marie and me together and we've We've been doing that now for quite a number of years and and so when the young people are coming to church and all They're really looking for as a hookup or or or something like that They're really missing out because if they seek the Lord first and and his righteousness all things shall be added unto them And that includes relationships that includes that that what would seem to be Coincidental moment of meeting because I was coming from Norwalk and my my the girl God had put in my life was was out here in Chino There was no reason for me to travel to the San Bernardino County. There's no reason to do that other than the Lord Drew drew me here because my brother had gotten saved and he needed some follow-up and some Ministry so my sister and I would drive to his place in Ontario Gave him Bible study and and that's how God brought a young woman who needed to know God That's how that works so that we met and ultimately here. We are 40 some years later Serving the Lord so yeah, it is really it's not only a sin And it's a sin that God says don't be deceived This is the reason the wrath of God comes upon you is because of fornication the other things that are related to that Don't be deceived into thinking. Oh, you know, we we love each other who needs a piece of paper, etc You know that that that we we were part of that all the way back in the 60s Ah, you know a piece of paper doesn't bind my heart to you. Well, that may be true But it's also a contract that that demonstrates a solidity and an intent I intend to remain with you until the day that I die and my vow is to God But I've also made a legal contract that demonstrates that it's a serious relationship So people who have multiple Roommates, you know, they're they're diminishing themselves every time Because that person they slept with will remain with them forever Even if they're physically not next to them, they'll always be within them because the sexual Connection is something that lasts and people don't realize that but it lasts and it leaves an impression in their heart So when that husband sleeps with that wife, they're sleeping not only with those two people But every other person they ever slept with is in that bed. Oh, that's when you look at that I mean, that's a great perspective to look at it that way aware of those things. Wow Oh pastor, thank you so much for shedding some light on that because again, you know, it's backwards It seems like today it is and but again the blessing of God's hand in the in the institution of marriage Especially on in consuming the marriage together in the and right in his eyes There's that wonderful blessing and so well pastor. Thank you so much for sharing with this Thank you guys for tuning in. I hope you guys enjoyed our topic today You can also tune into YouTube our YouTube page to look for any previous is unfiltered or need pastor David's previous Bible studies There's a whole library you can go through if you And you can go by any of the books of the Bible and you'll see his teachings on there Come join us on Sunday morning at 8 30 and 10 45 as a pastor You're taking us through the book of Mark. Yep, and just about wrapping it up pretty soon Well, probably within the next couple months And we do I want to invite you to our December 18th Sunday morning services as the Coutinas will be joining us looking forward to 8 30 and 10 45 and then Christmas Eve service Which will be Friday the following week or excuse me Saturday the following week on the 24th at 6 p.m. And then our Sunday morning services will be Christmas morning 8 30 and 10 45 You can go to our website for more information great opportunity to invite your friends and family Pastor again, thank you so much for joining us this this afternoon church family. Thank you for tuning in and we look forward to seeing you God bless you