 Well hello and welcome to Understand Men Now. I'm Jonathan Asley of JonathanAsley.com and I'm so excited to be shooting this short video for you today. Our topic, the five things a man says when he's highly invested in you or he's making an emotional investment in you. Those five things he says. Really quickly, before we get started, if this content resonates with you and you've been thinking about talking to a dating and relationship coach, check out the link below to schedule a discovery call to see if working with the coach is right for you. And that would be that call would be with me. Okay, those five things a man says when he's emotionally invested in you. There's five things. Okay, so really quickly I'm gonna be embarrassed here. I'm gonna wear my glasses because I scribbled my notes on what I'm gonna share. So please bear with me because I didn't memorize these. Well, the first thing a man says, and by the way, and this is no in particular order, but these are things that men say when they're emotionally invested in you. They're emotionally attached to you. They want to progress the relationship further along. And one of the things men oftentimes say is I've planned a trip for us. I've planned a trip for us. Now why that's different than I'm planning a trip for us. One is future based. It's projecting what may happen in the future. And a lot of men do this especially in the early stage of dating. Oh, I'd like to take you here. I'd like to take you there. We can go here. We can go there. But when a man is emotionally attached to you, he actually makes a plan. In other words, he's made a plan to do something. So that's a great thing when you hear a man say I've planned a trip for us. Okay, number two. And number two has three variations to it. But it's all about inviting you into his life. So it could be, Hey, can you come to my work party this holiday season? Or we're having a picnic or that sort of thing. Now look, I know we're in COVID. So that probably isn't going to happen. But there's some movement into entering into his life. A work party, a family event, especially the holidays, Thanksgiving, Christmas, reunions, that sort of thing. And certainly inviting you into his friendships, his friends, there might be a party I'd like to invite you to. That's certainly a sign he's emotionally investing in you. Okay, number three. This is kind of near and dear to my heart because when a man says, I like you, I like you. That's a lot different than when we think of the word love. And why I'm sharing this with you, and this is very sensitive for me, is when I gave my son's eulogy, that's Connor up there who passed away, many of you who follow me know, I talk about him frequently because he inspired me to write my book. What the heck is self love anyway? What the heck is self love anyway? The link below if you'd like to check it out. This helped propel me into a state of loving on myself. But one of the things I said at his eulogy, I said, most parents love their children, most parents love their children. But I actually liked Connor, and I like Colin, I like both my children, I like who they are, and like is a deeper word, it has a, it has a meaning of friendship associated to it, when someone says, I like you, because it's not that I care for you, but I like your personality. I like who you are as a person. I like the way I feel with you. And that's different than saying, than actually caring or feeling attached to another person. This is actually saying, you are important to me, I like you, not so much important, but you're fun to be with. Okay, so when a man says that, number three, let me check my glasses again. Oh, he recognizes something's needs to be fixed in your home, something needs to be fixed. So he says, Hey, can I come over and fix the toilet? Hey, can I come over and fix that? Or, or he takes charge and says, I just fix this for you. When a man is emotionally invested, he wants to improve your life. He wants to fix things in your life to make your life simpler. So that means he can you can spend more time with him. I knew I had a client whose boyfriend said, Hey, I'm going to come over and clean all your, your trees need trimming and he had power tools and stuff like that. And he just came over and did that. And while he was there, he fixed the vacuum cleaner. And I think he fixed the garbage disposal because he was a handyman. I'll be candid with you. I'm not one of those guys. I'm not a do it yourself. Or I'd go hire someone to do it. But you know what? If I really like someone and I'm emotionally invested in them, I'm going to try to do things to make their life simpler. So that's number four. Can I fix that for you? Can I come over and fix that? And number five, and this is really big. When a man asks you for advice, when a man asks you for advice, that's really leaning into saying, I care about what you think and what you think matters to me. I share this with women all the time. If you want to really connect with a guy, ask him advice on something. But when a man asks advice, that's surely a sign he's emotionally invested. He could say, I remember once meeting a woman who was incredibly stylish in the clothes she wore. And I said, Hey, I'd like to improve more wardrobe. Can I get your advice? Can we go shopping together? I'd like to get your opinion on clothes, because I really respect your perspective on clothes. And so when a man recognizes within you something that he admires, he might lean in and ask advice. I was in a relationship with a therapist. And with her, I was constantly asking her advice because I valued her opinion on human behavior. In fact, I literally got a PhD in human behavior in the six years that we were together. And even now I reach out to her all the time. So when a man leans in and asks for advice, that's a sign he's emotionally invested. Now there's two additional signs to represent he's emotionally invested in you. And it comes from the book, the four agreements, the four agreements. And agreement number one is the man is impeccable with his words. Let's just look at this right now. First agreement right there from the book, the four agreements. He's impeccable with his words. He's impeccable with his words. He's doing his best to be consistent with his words with you. That's a man who's emotionally invested in you. A man who's emotionally invested in you. In addition, he's always doing his best for you. That's not so much saying things, but he's doing his best with you. He's trying to progress the relationship along by doing these five things we just talked about. By inviting you on a trip by planning a trip by inviting you to parties by by saying he likes you. Can I come over and fix things and lastly getting your opinion? That's how a man shows these emotionally invested. All right, if you got value, if you've got value from this and you want to schedule a call with me, check out the link below to schedule a discovery call. I'm going to wrap up this video as I always do. First off, giving myself a big gigantic Jonathan Bear hook of self love. I'm going to reach into the camera and give you a hug of love. I'm going to ask you to turn to someone and give them a hug of love because hugs are a great source of love and we can all use more love in our lives. Thanks a bunch. Bye bye now.