 moment and it was when you were you were on a table? Yes. Can you tell us a little bit about that moment? I was on a table with another Ed, we call it eating disorders, Ed friend and she just grabbed my hand and said whatever you do don't be doing this when you're 30 and I just thought oh I couldn't do that's eight years from now I'll be over it but this thing just really destroys you it destroys your heart destroys your life and that was the moment when I turned 30 that I remembered back to that I had to change