 Johnny darling what's that? I said will you marry me? Oh just round up a preacher and I'll meet you at the church. Seriously? Buddy I sometimes wish I could... I don't know, wait a minute. I guess we still have a... Buddy, where in the city you do it up at the crack of dawn? What are you talking about? It's almost eight o'clock. Exactly what I said at the crack of dawn. You just spoiled Johnny and you this time or not. Oh oh now what have I done? My housewarming party. Oh no. Oh yes it took me three months of hard work to get my new little house fixed up out here. No visitors, no fun, no nothing to work and then when I do invite you and you accept... Betty honest listen that says this is crazy business of mine. Better be good Johnny. Well I was out in Eugene, Oregon and there was no way... Eugene, Oregon. Yeah one of those last minute things insurance investigation there was no way I could get out of it. Honest? Honest. I only got bagged late last night but I'll make it up to you. I swear I will. Well let's see. The day is um... What? Betty? Hello Betty. What's the matter Johnny? You're asking me those gunshots. And if I suddenly groaned and dropped the telephone would you come running out here? Are you kidding it? What? Only I cannot tell a lie. That was just some hot rod kid with a cut down convertible. Oh, a backfire huh? Yes. Every morning at exactly eight o'clock you get such a watch by it. Are you sure that's all it was? Well if you don't believe it why uh... Why don't you come over here and see for yourself? Tomorrow maybe? At eight o'clock in the morning? Sure. And honey I'll cook you the greatest breakfast you ever had. Yeah but uh... Maybe even convince you that married life isn't such a bad idea after all. On the strength of a platter of ham and eggs? Tomorrow. Hey uh... Look why don't we go somewhere tonight? I'll take you out to dinner and... No. If you're really sorry about missing the party. If you really do want to see me. Well sure I do. All right sir. Tomorrow morning for breakfast. Betty. Bye honey. So why not? To Bob Bailey in the exciting adventures of the man with the action fact expense account. America's fabulous freelance insurance investigator. Yours truly. Johnny Dollar. Special investigator Johnny Dollar. To the Universal Adjustment Bureau Hartford Connecticut attention Mr. Pat McCracken. Following his account of expenses incurred during my investigation of the backfire that backfired matter. I know Pat you haven't assigned me to a case. I also know I hadn't the least idea that having breakfast with my best gal was to be only the beginning of an insurance investigation. Before it was over I'd be lucky to gather the whole mess alive. But believe me that's the way it worked out. So if there's any question about your company paying this expense account. Well just read on. OK then. Expense account item one the following morning that is four dollars and a quarter for a tank full of gas for my car. By the unearthly hour of 740 a.m. I was on my way to far out beyond the edge of town to eleven three twenty five East Maple Drive. And the newly acquired domicile of my date for breakfast Betty Lewis. Now I'm not used to this early morning stuff and was kind of surprised to find so much of the world wide awake. It was warm and pleasant too early for the scorching summer sun. Front lawns of the rather nice homes in this section glistened with dew. The fields and trees were filled with millions of birds all seeing their heads off with squirrels chattering away. Yep real pleasant. Something I'd have to try again sometime. Betty's place which I hadn't seen before turned out to be a very cute one story affair coral roof and shutters to match. It was set comfortably in between a couple of somewhat larger homes. As for Betty who stood there at the front door waiting for me. Well I don't know how she does it but that ever loving doll even at this hour looked as smart and attractive as any man could want. Before eight o'clock. Hi honey. Yeah so early in the morning. You might I do not career yeah. Johnny. But this morning here does to you. Come in huh said the spider to the plot. Oh sure I make no bones about it. Your neighbors used to sing this sort of thing. Oh sure I've been having strange and men in for breakfast every day. You know just so the neighbors wouldn't be shocked when I finally dragged you into my trap. How do you like it. Oh yeah hey looks real nice. Of course if I had some nice guy to share it with. If you had any sense you'd marry me you know. Yeah and if I had any sense I get out of this crazy business of mine and maybe I could settle down to something like a normal life. Nine to five and some air conditioned office. Nice home to come home to maybe raise a family Johnny you know darn well you'd never be happy with that kind of a routine hum drum exists. Oh no not as well as I do. And I guess a girl could get pretty miserable wondering where you are. You're getting slugged or shot at maybe dead somewhere. But we do have fun together. And I'm all for that is when you're not standing me up for some glamorous redhead on an excuse you're working in insurance. Betty so help me on a stack of Bible. Oh sure but come on come on your eggs will be overcooked. You sit right there when you can look out the window and drink your juice. Yes ma'am. You like my country state. Yeah hey who lives in that big house across the road. Oh Mr Barton J Robinson used to be an attorney. Robinson sure he's the one who prosecuted that big insurance fraud a few years ago one of the companies I serve. See him there eating breakfast. Bachelor isn't he. Yes he lives all alone. I think I'd better warn him to stay away from you that you're my property. He's the most punctual man I've ever seen. If he isn't there when I'm eating my breakfast I know I've over slept here now. And if you want some toast. Hey Betty I'm thinking. Yes. Well maybe it's just my crazy terminal wine. Thinking about what. Yeah about that. Holy smoke. No I've got so used to it morning after morning. Hmm two of them. No crazy kids. You know who they are. Oh somebody had the police come out here a couple of mornings but of course they didn't show up then. And I guess everybody else has just got used to them the way I have. Now let's eat. Funny though. The crazy breakfast. Once they get past here they stop it. Well don't worry about it. But I should have. I should have worried plenty about it. Perhaps if I'd been a mystery writer instead of insurance investigator who's used to solving mysteries after they've happened. Well I would have had sense enough to act right then immediately. Or maybe. Yeah. Maybe there was still time. And you have no idea who those two are the ones who go barreling by in that hot rod every morning. Nobody could seem to find out Johnny and as I said. Yeah everybody's got used to the noise of that backfiring. But listen Betty. Why don't you eat your breakfast Tony. You call them kids but they aren't. Honey please. I thought we were just going to have breakfast and talk and sort of make up for last time. Yeah I'm sorry about that but now look. Honestly. Do you have to dream up a lot of mystery and intrigue about even the most normal things that happen. They cut the backfiring just as soon as they got around that curve. Three CFU 160. What. The license on that car. Oh Johnny. Hey listen honey let me use your phone. I see one right here in the living room. Oh yeah. But why and Johnny your breakfast will get called. Be right back. My phone call was to Terry Wilson who worked in the Department of Motor Vehicles. It took him a few minutes to dig into the files for me but when he came back to the phone his answer was short and to the point. Sorry Johnny but you must have made a mistake. You're sure about that. Absolutely. But what happened why do you want to know. Well I'm just curious that's all. Oh now Johnny I know you better than that. Back Johnny and thanks thanks a lot. Now Johnny. Oh sorry buddy. Oh I guess you're right Johnny about driving wife crazy I mean. I was right about that car. What. That license on it is a phony. There ain't no such number here in Connecticut. All right so a couple of kids didn't have enough money to buy a license. I tell you they aren't kids. Now that I've had a chance to think about it I'd swear there was something you made here about the looks of the one beside the driver. Oh sure some nasty criminal you've tangled with him. Oh Johnny listen this isn't why I asked you out here to cook up some deep mystery. Hey Betty this lawyer this Barton Robinson who lives in the big house across the road. I don't care about him Johnny I care about you. You say that every morning at the same time he's there beside that window eating his breakfast the same time that car comes roaring by. Yes when he's here that is he was away for five or six weeks. Until when. He must have come back last night this morning is the first time in five and when did this well those hot rodders start coming around. Oh well I guess it was about a week after Mr. Robinson went away. Casing the chart. What. Johnny for. Betty listen to me you probably won't forgive me for that. Johnny. Sometimes when I'm working on a case. Well sometimes when I run out of leads well all I have to work on is a hunch. Three months I've been waiting. But strangely enough the hunch is usually pay off. I wasn't going to tell you until. So maybe my hunch is right. But I called the office and told them I wouldn't. Because I got a real big fat. About that car. Go somewhere drive out in the company maybe. I'm sorry honey I really am sorry. I said kind of make up for a lot of time. I've got to get on this thing and right now. Johnny how can you do this. I'll pick you up tonight we'll have dinner taking a show make a night of it anything you want I. I know the walking out on you this way is a dirty trick and if you want to you can just tell me to. Please honey. Tonight for sure. You know what a push over I am. See you later. I set out to find that car who owned it and why the big backfire racket in that particular spot they have today. There was a purpose there I was sure of it. Not just a couple of kids out on the tear. Besides they weren't kids I'd seen that for myself. Because of the way the car had taken the curve down the road and a clear set of tar marks so I started a careful inspection of drive waves even asked the people who lived along there what they knew about that car and it took me most of the day expense account item two by the way is a fucking quarter for a late afternoon lunch at a roadside tavern it was there I finally got some information. You want another bottle of beer huh Johnny. Okay now as I was saying Mr. I think I know the very car you mean yeah. 1941 tied down with straight pipes must have been a convertible before they throw the top away makes a lot of noise you know who wants it where I can find it well I think I seem to take the cutoff one morning cut off yeah when I was on my way to work cut off about a mile up the road to cut off over the barley swamp right thanks a lot. Well you interested in buying that old crate something like that the cutoff to barley swamp wasn't much more than a wagon tracks through the woods but the tar marks I was looking for stuck out like a sore thumb and they finally let off to an old shack half hidden by a heavy thicket behind it sure enough was the car I've been looking for the windows of the shack were boarded up no sign of life slowly and carefully I circled the place and I walked over to the door turned the knob opened it you know something I've been awfully wrong about there being nobody around okay mister. Oh no you're killing him. You asked for it. It's ringer see who he is. The ringer was too big for me so rather than take any more of it for the moment I lay there and let them go through my pockets and of course they took my gun when the little one gills started pouring water not only on but into me while I had to come to a choke event. Oh give him the whole bucket. Johnny dollar insurance stick. Now I know I don't like getting up on your feet. You think I caught if I wanted to. Yeah you really clipped him ringer. Shut up. So the copies have been after me since I got out of the clinic but they couldn't find me so they had to send you out is that it dollar. What do you think. I think you're going to be awful sorry and awful dead. You think you or anybody else could keep me from knocking off that fancy mouthpiece after sending me up the way he did. Well nobody smart enough. You're going to knock him off ringer. You're going to kill him after we get that lawyer. Well why not now. Anything goes wrong. I might need dollars for a hostage. Oh sure. Only what's a hostage. Only nothing is going to go wrong. I'm too smart for that. Yeah I guess you are at that ringer. That business is driving by his house every day the backfire. That's right so nobody worries about it no more. And the backfire will cover the shots when you murder lawyer Robert. That's right. Nobody will even notice. And all that takes is one good shot to his window just a little hole in that window nobody will notice unless they go up and look at it. An elaborate scheme like that just to show how smart you are. No because Nolan I'm on the loose again. He is at house locked up like a bank vault. Not even Gill and me could get in without setting off an alarm and he keeps a blinds down at night can't even see him in there. But every morning at the same time he's there at the window. So now that he's home we got him tomorrow. Shut up Gill. Soak up some of that ride so we can tie him up and get out of here. Yeah sure. I want to get some food and some sleep. Then darling we'll be back to see you in the morning. And after we do you won't see anything anywhere anymore. Wet ride. That shrinks when it dries cuts into ankles and wrists like a steel band. By the time they finally left in their hot rod the pain was excruciating. Sure I could roll around a bit maybe even out the door. What good was that. There was nobody. Nobody ever came around this neck of the woods. I lay there straining against the bonds hoping they wouldn't cut off the circulation completely as the wall hides slowly and expertly. Wait. It was raining raining hard. I rolled myself painfully out the door into a puddle in front of it. It seemed like ours. It was ours. It was long after daylight before the raw hide finally stretched enough for me to get a hand free and take off the rest of the thongs that bound me. I looked at my watch 8 15. Which meant they'd done their job. Yeah. Now they'd come back here. I heard the hot rod coming down the soggy wagon road quickly I ducked back into the shack way to behind the door. He wasn't there. We had the storm to cover us. I don't get it right now. He wasn't there. That winter means somebody warned him. Means that Johnny dollar warned him. That means we're taking care of dollar right now. No way. Listen. What. That car coming down the road. Yeah. Yeah I see it. It's a girl that lives across the street from that mouthpiece. What's she doing? I don't know. She pulls in here. Find out. She is. Here she comes. Look out. You have it. Yeah. Oh no you don't. Baby. Got it. I'll kill you. I'll. Bless you. Oh no. No. That's OK honey you did the right thing. When you didn't come last night. And this morning when the man at the road house told me where he sent you to find that hot. So I told Mr. Robinson to stay away from his window and I came as fast as. Are you all right honey are you all right. Yeah sure a little wet and tired. Johnny I was so worried. I was so worried about you. I'm sure glad you were. Thanks honey. Oh. Do that again. Sweetest kiss. Run over me. Right at you. Oh shut up ringer. You think I'm a goner. Can't you see I'm busy. Yes. More Johnny. Louis who really saved the life of that insurance attorney. So most of this expense account covers some well earned entertainment plus a little gift for her. No. Not an engagement ring. But a big jug of my sin. But I must admit she certainly makes me think about the merits of. Yeah. Expense account total 450 bucks even yours truly. Shiny dollar. Hard to tell you about next week story next week. Well next week the funniest combination of names I ever saw. And brother what trouble they cause. Join us won't you. Yours truly. Johnny dollar. Originates in Hollywood and is written produced and directed by Jack Johnstone. Heard in our cast were Virginia Greg. Boris Lewis Barney Phillips and Tom Holland. This is Jim Matthew speaking.