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Konrad walking with brace in physical therapy!

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Published on Aug 19, 2009

Konrad walking with brace in physical therapy! August 19, 2009. For people who don't know, Konrad was diagnosed on March 27, 2009 with inoperable, stage 4 brain cancer. April 22, 2009, he then suffered a stoke that was caused by the tumor. The bleeding caused paralysis of the left side of his body. Since then, he has been avidly working in therapy to regain feeling and movement. On August 19, 2009, some big "steps" were made. I was reading through emails, and I came across this one. It was written the day before the stroke.

April 21, 2009

Friends,

This last month has been like a tornado. Things have been spinning so fast that Chris and I have not been able to just stop and catch our breath. We did that today. We just ran some errands, picked up the last 3 weeks of mail from the post office, went to the Mall, stopped by the office, had dinner with Jenny and Jim, and played with Sydney and little Jimmy. I was the monster again chasing the kids. It felt good being a monster again with my grandkids. Just hearing little Jimmy say na na na na, catch me, catch me was great. Music to my ears. A few days ago I would have had a hard time trying to catch them. Truth be said, I always had a hard time. They just run to fast. But I did chase them, and not doing the K Mart shuffle. I was just Opa again. They cried for an hour after we left. I cried after I came home.

I cleaned out the desk at our house. With all of the doctor appointments and stuff, we need to stay organized. So I cleaned my desk and threw out a lot of junk that accumulated over the years. Like blank cds. I must have had 50 blank cds in my desk drawer. Useless. I have a 4 gig thumb drive. Why do I need blank cds? Something else I threw away was a bunch of old ink pens that no longer worked. Now some of these pens looked wonderful. Hand carved from wood, had little golf clubs attached, but no ink. They would not write. They were attractive, but useless. It made me think. How many times in our lives have we been just an ink pen that does not write. We sit in a drawer in the desk of God, but are useless to Him. We may look great, sing in the choir, sit on the missions board, have all of the appearances of being a useful tool of God, but just have no ink. Every time God would need us, He would pick us up, try to use us, and find out we just didnt work. So back in the desk drawer we would go. This is ok for a while, but eventually God will do what I did tonight. He will clean out His desk. And when He does, all of those pens that do not work will be thrown out. I dont know about you, but I dont want to be thrown out. I want to be useful to God. Even with Ralph in my head I want to be useful to God. The cry of my heart is that somehow, someway, I can be used by my God in all of this. If I am, then it is worth it all.

Konrad

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