 Proudly we hail. Hello from Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen. This is C.P. McGregor speaking, and welcoming you to your War Department program, Proudly We Hail. Through the courtesy of the Hollywood Coordinating Committee, we are happy to present Keenan Wynn as the star of our play, 4 and 20 Blackbirds, written by Jos Calpone with music by Eddie Skravanik. For all his six feet, one inch of brawn and muscle, Horace Armstrong is a very studious young man, and at 24 years, a famous authority on bird life. Professor Armstrong is manager of the bird park on beautiful Catalina Island. And on this bright California morning, we meet Horace making his rounds, peering through his horned rimmed glasses at his feathered charges, now stopping to taste the bird food at the cage of the Corvus Americanus. CROES TO US. Now past the cage of the Corvus Americanus Occidentalus, who never failed to greet their keeper. Further down the walk, two early morning visitors are seated on a park bench, a distinguished-looking gentleman and a beautiful young lady. Is that the fellow, Dad? Yes, Bootsy. That's Professor Armstrong. I don't get it. You will, my dear. Well, in the first place, what are we doing hanging around a bird park? Oh, now, Dad, you weren't thinking of inviting that poor man to a little game of poker, were you? I'll have you know Professor Armstrong is an eminent hornetologist. As fellow bird lovers, we have much in common. And what do you know about birds? Why, I studied up. The professor will find my knowledge to be of great value. Oh, now, Dad, you're up to something. Bootsy, we happen to need money to get off this island. Now just leave things to me. But Dad. Quiet. Here he comes. Good morning, Professor. Oh, good morning. Good morning. Professor, my daughter and I were just remarking about your beautiful anus rufflipes. You were? Well, thank you. Professor, my name is Blevins, Cyril Audubon Blevins. How do you do? And this is my daughter, Bootsy Professor Horace Armstrong. Oh, delighted to make your acquaintance, Miss Blevins. Uh-huh. You'll find my daughter is no tyro at ornithology. Is that so? She keeps her left her loafers hollendike. She says, a pet, don't you, dear? A what? A parrot. Oh, yes, yes. Speak seven different languages. Incredible. Tell me, did you have to split its tongue to make it talk? Split its tongue? Yeah. No, no. I just use a whip. Professor, you have an exhausted collection of birds here. Every bird known in the world. Almost every bird, Professor Armstrong. And which bird is not represented, Mr. Blevins? The ichthyornus. You do not have one. Yes, truly a rare bird. And a famous addition to any bird park. To make a pun, Mr. Blevins, it would be a feather in my cap to exhibit an ichthyornus. Then it's a very valuable bird. Oh, beyond price, beyond price. Well, speaking of birds, Professor, do you happen to keep a few chickens around here? I mean something for a breakfast exhibit. Now, now, Bootsy, we'll be back at the hotel shortly. We arose too early for breakfast this morning. Oh, won't you be my guest for breakfast? There's a little hot dog stand right at the gate. Oh, don't trouble yourself. Besides, there's a big meal waiting for us at the hotel. Oh, I'll settle for the hot dog. Lead on, Professor. Ah, mustard on your hot dog? All the way. Oh, there you are. Oh, thanks. You know, Professor, it's a coincidence that you should mention your interest in the ichthyornus bird. Well, every ornithologist is interested. How true. And it's the very reason why we are leaving the island tomorrow. Is it not, Bootsy? Oh, one reason is as good as another. Oh, but you're not leaving. Professor, the expedition cannot wait. Expedition? Yes. Oh, I see. I see. Well, Professor, the expedition cannot wait. Expedition? Yes, yes. I'm mounting an expedition to the worlds of Caledonia. They're out to study and secure living specimens of the ichthyornus bird. Oh, too much mustard. Well, dear, we'll run along now. But I'd like to hear about the ichthyornus bird. Well, we're leaving tomorrow. Better see us tonight at the Carlton Hotel. Oh, I will. I will. Come early. Bootsy, here, I'll entertain you until I'm free. Well, thank you. Thank you very much. Well, goodbye, Professor. I'll see you later. All right, Dad. What's the big idea? Why, Bootsy, here? Dating me up with that Professor. Well, what do I do with him all evening? Imitate bird calls? I do whatever you like, but remember, bring him back so I can talk to him. We pause briefly from our story, four and twenty black birds, starring Keenan Wynn, to bring you an important message from your ward apartment. Do you know what SPHERICS are? S-F-E-R-I-C-S. Now, don't look in your dictionary. It won't be there. Spherics is a new word used by Army Air Force weather experts. It's a contraction of the words atmospheric electricity and means electrical particles in the air, instrumental in forecasting weather disturbances. By their use, Army weather technicians can accurately locate bad weather and thunderstorms. Such advanced Army techniques are being used to make air travel today and in the future much safer. Trained men are doing this work and other research in the new regular Army. Forty thousand men each month are needed to maintain the Army program of scientific study and development. Capable men who can learn any one of many skills are required. An Army career offers a well-paying job with opportunities for advancement and the chance to retire with a high monthly income after only twenty years service. And list today for three years at your nearest Army recruiting station. Act two of our play, Four and Twenty Blackbirds, starring Kin and Win as Professor Horace Armstrong. Fast-talking Mr. Blevins designs on Horace and has asked his daughter Bootsy to entertain that serious-minded young man. So Bootsy is laid out what she considers an appropriate tour, starting with a lovely chamber music recital. Oh, it's marvelous music, you. You come to this hall often? Oh, never miss a performance. Do you, uh, do you dance, Ms. Blevins? Why, yes. Do you? Oh, certainly. I, uh, I wrote a book about the dancing cranes on my bird farm. Shall we, uh, shall we try the palace club? Palace club? But that joint jumps is strictly jitterbug. Yeah, I know. Think you could learn? Oh, could I? Well, come on, let's get out of this firetrap. Oh, Professor, you never learned this from the dancing cranes. Well, hey, Bob-a-ree-bop, I'm no square Aruni. Well, dig me, Professor, and I'll take it away. Oh, gee, it's been a swell evening. Thanks. Oh, thank you, Ms. Blevins. Well, I'd invite you in for a minute, but, uh, it's almost midnight. Oh, my gosh, and your father wanted to see me. Oh, no, no, no, he doesn't. I mean, he's probably sleeping now. Well, I'll just knock on his door. Oh, no, uh, don't do that. But you're leaving tomorrow. What about my theonis bird? Now, look, Professor, I don't think Dad would even recognize what you might call it, let alone catch one for you. You don't think so? No. What I mean is I wouldn't put any money on it. But you're leaving tomorrow. Well, I'll see you before I go at the bird park. Promise? Mm-hmm. If you promise not to see Dad tonight. All right. I promise. Well, good night, Horace. Good night, Bootsy. Well, all's fair in love and war. Oh, uh, Mr. Blevins. Why, Professor, come in, come in. Well, thank you. I've been working, planning my expedition. For the ick theonis? For the ick theonis. Ah, a rare bird. Very rare. A prize addition to a bird exhibit. And a feather in the cap for the man who exhibits it. You mean... Certainly, my boy, I'll ship you one. You will? Oh, but the price. Oh, what price. There's no talk of price between fellow ornithologists. Well, thank you. But, uh, naturally, there's the cost of, uh, creating and mailing. Oh, naturally, there's that. So shall we say, uh, uh, $200? Yes, let's. Appeable before I leave? I'll write you a check. You can cash it in the morning. Oh, splendid, splendid. Step to this window, please. Ah, here you are, cashier. A small check on my friend Professor Armstrong. Yes, sir. Hmm. Well, well, this is his bank, isn't it? Oh, yes, sir, but... Well, well, cash it. I think there's a notice out on this check, sir. This notice? What do you mean? Stopping payment. Hmm? Yes, it's in my drawer here. There, now let me see. Ah, here it is. Hey, hey, wait a minute. Oh, officer, stop that man. Well, hello. I thought you'd forgotten all about me. Oh, Horace, I... I'm worried about Dad. Worried? Why? Well, I don't know what's happened to him. I haven't seen him since you called yesterday. Oh, well, I saw him after I left you. Last night? Uh-huh. Oh, Horace, you didn't. Well, we just talked about the... the honest bird. Oh, you didn't give him any money. Well, I wrote a check for $200. Oh, and I warned you about that. Now you'll never see your old bird. Well, I know of that. There haven't been any ick the honest birds for a million years. They're extinct. Well, then why in the world did he... I didn't want your father to leave the island and take you away. Oh, you don't know, my dad. With all that money on him, he's gone and left me. And what in the world am I going to do now? Well, but he didn't leave. He didn't? They stopped him when he tried to cash the check. Stopped him? The check? The check was no good. I stopped payment on it. What? Why, you heal? Huh? And I thought you were different. You did? I was falling for you. You were? And what do you do? You trick my father into the who's cow. The who's cow? But you put him in jail. Oh, now, wait a minute. Bootsy. Oh, don't you bootsy me. You... you mealy-mouthed birdman. But your father isn't in jail. He's right here in the bird park. Well, I... I don't believe it. He's working for me. Working? Him? I don't believe it. Working? Him? Ah, that's the biggest story yet. And if you think I believe one word of what... Good morning, daughter. Dad, overall... The uniform of a scientist, my dear. The professor has asked me to collaborate in his research here. Why, Dad, that's wonderful. So if you'll excuse me now, I have a few more cages to clean out. Dad's all settled. Yeah. Me, too. He, uh, he promised to take over for me. Take over? Mm-hmm. When I'm gone. You don't plan on staying here? Oh, I love birds, but, uh... How much can a man stand? Oh. I was thinking about Mexico. Mm-hmm. Wonderful country, Mexico. Oh, yes. Wonderful. Mm-hmm. Lots of excitement. Uh-huh. I, uh... I hope you like Mexico. You hope I like... Oh. Why, professor? Because, uh, I'm not spending my honeymoon on a bird farm. Mm-hmm. This is C.P. McGregor speaking. I hope you've enjoyed our proudly-we-hailed story starring Keenan Wynn. Before leaving you, Don Forbes has an important message for all of us. Did you know that during the war, the army trained 115,000 medical specialists? Yes, in seven years, up to June 1946, 114,997 enlisted men qualified as technicians in the Army Medical Department. In 12 general hospitals and medical centers, these men took special courses in X-ray, veterinary medicine, surgery, dentistry, laboratory work, pharmacy, meat and dairy inspection, orthopedic machinery, medical equipment and sanitation. Many qualified for advanced courses. Army medical researchers have developed such things as penicillin, a clinical recording camera that photographs surgical operations at close range in color, the oximeter, an apparatus instrumental in the recovery of infantile paralysis victims, and many other techniques and medical contributions. A job as a medical technician is but one of the 40,000 available each month to intelligent, ambitious young men. In other fields, regular army personnel are continuously experimenting. They are studying cosmic rays. They are developing planes to fly in the transonic speed range and radar equipment to be used in forecasting weather and making commercial air travel safer. They are studying and testing foods and improving the wearing qualities of clothing. Army experiments are doing much to improve living conditions for you today and in the future. Any intelligent, physically fit young man is eligible for a career in the new regular army. Men who have qualified for enlistment are receiving high pay and are learning a useful job. They can retire after only 20 years' service or up to 30. In addition to learning a worthwhile industrial trade or scientific skill, they have the opportunity for extra off-duty education at all levels for free full-time schooling after discharge. Plan for your future with a three-year enlistment in the new regular army today. For further information, see your local army recruiting officer. Thank you, Keenan Wynn, for appearing on this War Department program. Proudly, we hail will come to you again on this station next week. Listen in.