 I mean, it's like it would have been such a stretch for my mind to imagine going as it were from where I was to where I am. I mean, I, you know, it's like how, how in the world, you know, I mean, it would have just seemed impossible, I think. If you had just seen the picture. If I just seen the picture. It felt like how it feels. Yeah, and not, not, not recognize the shifts in perception, the shifts in thinking and the internal changes that led up to it. But, but all along the way, it hasn't felt that way. It hasn't felt terrifying. You know. But then you didn't do that. You didn't look in the future. You didn't try to. Well, anytime, anytime in the future, it's terrifying to all of us. It's more terrifying. And for me, I came to see that there's no solution there. You know, I was trying to see where is this all going to lead? What's going to happen? How is it going to work? What about this? What about that? And there, as long as I had my mind out there thinking about those things, there was no solution to any of that. And none of the required shifts were taking place. Yeah. Because my attention was out there on the screen. Yeah. And for shifts to take place, the attention has to be drawn back to the mind. The only solution is in the mind, in the moment of choosing the right mind. That's where the idea of Himalayas comes in. People that are bolted to the Himalayas get rid of all their possessions, get rid of everything, but haven't changed. In the Himalayas, it's just a symbol. It could be bolted away from family. I mean, David, you've talked about story after story of people that have done that. You know, thinking that that was going to give them enlightenment, but their minds hadn't been changed. At the pace of the behavioral change. And that's not going to bring enlightenment. It's another form of the ego's deception. And it's sort of like, well, if this is what the future is supposed to look like, then let me get to it right now and skip all the steps because, you know, I'll just go through all the pain all at once right now. And it, what's the purpose there? It's always what's most helpful to me and to, you know, the mind. And what am I being guided to? You know, we have to remember, keep pulling it back to that and asking the moment by moment, what am I guided to? It wasn't, there's no formula. You didn't make that decision. No, it was not, it was not Rhonda's idea. Oh, I think I'll go to Cincinnati. I was called. It's really this thing of trust too, where Jesus says the whole Teacher of God, all the characteristics of the Teacher of God is based on the first lungs is trust. It's the ego that, again, is looking out into the future, that, oh yeah, that's what the ego's always been. You want to get into a career? Plan ahead. What's your five-year plan? What's your ten-year plan? You see, the ego is always looking to the future and trying to provide for itself and maintain its self-concept. Then we get into the course and it's the five-year plan, Teacher of God. What will that look like? Ah, ego, ego gets the bet all. And then there's a beautiful line in the Teacher's Manual where he says trust would settle every problem now. And it's like, oh, trust, again, you know, I don't have to know all the steps that I'm going to have to seem to take in a perceptual sense. All I have to do is trust right now. And I mean, that really simplifies things. It doesn't make it into a big, complicated thing. Like a maze that I'm going to have to go through. If I can stay as a spirit in the moment and just moment by moment be guided, there's a real loosening that seems to take place. It's like loosening the surface that I've made up. He says, there's this bolt that holds it together up here and there's a screw. And he says, what I hear him saying is looseness. And he said, what I'm hearing is I can keep my soul. And that to me is a good symbol of that present trust. That what would you have me do? Where would you have me go? What would you have me say to him? And it's such a relief to me to see that I don't have to know at all. I don't have to have the five-year plan or ten-year plan. I don't have to see the entire picture. You don't have to have a plan. I start right where I am with what I know is right there for me. And I have repeatedly kind of gotten that message in various symbolic ways. Don't wait until you know the whole thing to get started. All you have to do right now is get started. And you know that part. You know what's called for there. Just do that. And then the next step will be showing you as it's time to take it. On the flip side of that you can say, I know, I know. But on the flip side it could be, I don't know, I worry. You could look at the other direction. That might be the more helpful thing. I know I am in front of you. Thanks. You know, Mary's version of it. But I got kids ready to go to college. When did you wait until I at least got that? I only had six more years. What do I have? Six more years. And all of those things I think are so significant. Those are all those substitutions and adjustments. So I really have to be clear about answering this call. And that I can't possibly know everything before I accept the call. But my intention, I can be clear about my intention and that's all. And it's the only place that I was last week. Tell her what you had talked about prior to the call. Oh, okay. And what I was saying is, Mom, she said, there is a world here. You do have children. She said, Mom, Jesus taught us that we're not to be concerned with worldly things. And that heaven is here on earth. And that our thoughts should be heavenly thoughts. And Jesus said that we have to go inside and look at the mind and become one with God. But it's not about what's out here, you know? And so our conversation was there in the kitchen. And you know, I'm not, it was like Jesus might have said that. You took it out of context. But yeah, she gave me the imitation of Christ and that. So I do, a lot of times in the book, you know, I just kind of go like this. Well, what am I supposed to read? And it's the limitation of Christ. So I opened it up. And on this side was a picture of Jesus. And on this side was a list of things that Jesus was saying. And they were, you do not be focusing your thoughts on worldly ideas. Rather, the thoughts must be of heaven or something like that. And then there was, there was another one about coming inward instead of outward. Those with words. The thought you must be focusing inward, not outward. And then when I take a book and run out and go see, I tell it to my mom. You know, I just kind of left it there. And she gave me that imitation of Christ. And I really, in fact, asked her for one. But I said, Mom, I thank you so much because this is what I opened to last night. And I showed her. And it was like, Shawn and David, I was, there were seeds being planted all week. And in spite of, you know, a lot of questions and a lot of concerns about me. And, you know, and it wasn't always comfortable. I mean, there was that, I was shaking inside. I mean, I was, I didn't know how to answer these questions anymore. And that's when I finally just said Holy Spirit, what do I say? It's just clear about the intention and trusting in my guide. Because I'm beginning to look at everything that I ever learned, everything I ever valued, and all of my relationships. The fact in the Catholic bookstore is interesting because there's the St. Faustina. She has a diary where she, she diary her experiences of Jesus calling her. And it was her call. And in that, there's many things that in there identical to what Jesus was saying to Helen. And they were identical resistances from Sister Faustina, as Helen had to Jesus in the Course. And there were times when she didn't feel peaceful. And Jesus said, you're doing just fine, but you are in a state of confusion, sadness and disorientation, which is also outlined in the Course. And, you know, so it's, for some, you know, it may just swoop and feel real peaceful and joyful for me. It's, you know, the struggle has been the resistance and the feeling now that it wouldn't be possible. And the peace comes in when, yes, this is possible, and you're doing it and you're okay.