 Ladies and gentlemen if you watching the playback on this I'm on here already talking before anybody on here But I just kind of coming on here to shoot a quick video I got 30 minutes exactly until my session and so wanting to come on here and Chat a little bit but not a Q&A cuz I only got 30 minutes. So I'm gonna get to too much into it, but Got another coaching call So wanting to pop on here now this one open for all subscribers to chat So if y'all not in the bless tribe meaning you don't got a little batch by your name You know feel blessed tonight that you could be in the chat because normally the chat just for the bless tribe But the night is for subscribers so just wanting to pop on here and I want to Clarify something cuz I shot a video earlier and I was driving So, you know when you're driving you kind of rushing a little bit and you're looking at traffic and all of that and I was talking about the narcissism debate and Just like the Bible say it's nothing new under the Sun. So What we experienced today Has always been a thing If you talk to your mother She went through what you went through you talk to your father. He went through what you went through you talk to your grandmother your grandfather and Ironically some people back further went through worse Because it was the less laws less restrictions and things of that nature so humans gonna be human and Humans will do what humans do And one thing I want to be understood is I Don't want to I don't ever minimize anything that's serious and important but what I also don't do is abuse things That Should not be abused out of respect for those who have a real experience With said thing so it was you dealing with the narcissism topic whether you talking about poverty Whether you talking about classism racism sexism a lot of times we will take and we'll apply something and not think about what somebody else Has experienced With that certain term that we're using and that's something that I'm mindful of and Every day today I coach four hours straight and I got another Session at from eight to nine and I want you to think about that And ask yourself When have you or how many people do you know? That have our long conversations With Three to six people a day So I'm hearing so much and so many stories and so many examples And that's why I don't minimize Things that are truly important, but that's also why I don't just Philander and just throw things around like the word Narcissism I don't throw that around Lightly because of what people dealing with and going through and when you really on the front lines And you hearing these stories and you hearing these experiences, then you start to see it and understand it on a different level Because and that's when you know that It's not something to be toyed with or something to be just mislabel but what I want y'all to also understand is There's a lot of examples now some women have talked about this some women have talked about this With a mother now never in my life And I want you to think about this but when it comes to parent to child relationship I've heard of like a handful of a handful of Bad like what I would call bad Relationships between a father and a son not saying that there's not millions But what I'm saying is in your in my personal experience, and I want you to think about your personal experience How many men? Have you talked to? who just They cannot get along for nothing in the world or they just always at odds with their daddy and I can't really Think of any Just off the top But I cannot count how many women have told me that they mama is They biggest hater Or that they mama is in competition with them or that they mama or that they can't get along with a mama So when we talk about that too One of the things like I was heard the doctor she was talking about you know Using the term she used example of old you must be lucky to be married to that guy But I say you know a lot of time we don't think about how this could be both ways How it's a lot of men That's married to a narcissistic woman And it may show up in a different way Just like there's women married or not even married in a relationship with a narcissistic Man it go both ways because humans are human So a lot of this stuff too what we fail to realize it ain't even gender specific Now what happened is is We got some things going on where The different genders may behave differently based on society structure And what has been put in place in society? So one of the things that I found with men a lot of times It's different than women now with men what I found is insecurity a lot of insecurity and men not to say that it's not in women but men play a lot of games and tell a lot of lies And men don't really trust a lot on average Men don't really trust a lot men don't really drop guards Men don't really open up let go and love A lot of men are deathly afraid of love deathly afraid of a real commitment a lot of men are really really afraid To trust a woman or to trust anybody But more so trust a woman because a lot of men will trust their homeboy with their life But won't trust a woman and a large part of that too now Comes from women not trusting each other because as we grow up as men We always see women Talking bad about their best friend We always see that and I don't know if y'all see that as women, but as a man I would see Women sleeping with their best friend boyfriend. It has happened with me when I was out there I was able to sleep with the quote unquote best friend of a girl I was dealing with And that was and it that just baffled me I just was befuddled and just befuddled and I just was like How I don't understand this like how can y'all share clothes? How can y'all wear matching outfits? How can y'all live in the same apartment? And do this And so what so a lot of so we talking about Not just narcissistic men But it go both ways So it's something to think about now When we talking about this because and and see some things it ain't even no turn for it yet because What do we call the grandiosity Of eve in the garden. It's like child. You got all of this here in this garden. You got all of this here fresh good fruit And you know you made by God Your butt just popped up. You just popped up in this little garden And and now you want to talk to a snake? And you want to eat off this tree? like God just Is nothing it's like now what what term do we get at? You said I'm saying like what term do we give the man who is the apple of God's eye? David Who take and look at? Vashiva and got all of this from God And then how your riots put on the front line to be killed What do we call that? You see what I'm saying? So this the thing is we got to start more so having introspection and learning ourselves And learning our traits and then learning the people around us And I'm gonna tell you I'm gonna tell you why I don't really play with labels I'm gonna tell you why I don't play with labels because for one all of us could be labeled something But the real reason why I don't play with labels because labels is dangerous Because you could take you could take your son You could take your black boy Into the doctor and because your son Is active in the class And he don't like to sit down for long You will take that boy to the doctor And you don't know that doctor That doctor could be over billing Medicaid for all kind of stuff And that doctor could be trying to hit a quota on prescribing this particular medicine because he or she get paid more money for prescribing this pill And because that doctor don't like your race And they feel a certain way about your race They will take your normal child Who is behaving as a child and label that child as ad hd Or label that child as ad d And they will label that child and you will say oh my child got such an ad hd And the doctor say here go this prescription That's why I don't play with labels Because see what a lot of doctors don't believe in Is jesus christ What you won't hear a lot of doctors say Is that name Of your creator That can renew you that could change you The one who heal the sick the deaf the blind the dumb the lame the main the leper See they don't know the name So they got to come up with a name for something they could call you Something they could label you but don't understand that the creator is a redeemer And so that's why I don't play around with labels Because the only label that i'm going to let you give me Is a child of god Because outside of that I could be whatever god say I could be and I remember hearing a doctor say That a man cannot change from being an abuser And that is a lie from the pit of hell. You know why because I used to be an abuser But you know what changed me Jesus christ my walk with christ me reading that holy bible me studying the Basic instructions before leaving earth B-i-b-l-e what my daddy had put on a t-shirt when I was growing up Basic instructions before leaving earth B-i-b-l-e And I remember that doctor say oh a lot of people A lot of abusers they want to lean on faith But that's not really real Lightning She about got hit with lightning because because the lord say that's a lie That's a lie Because who could renew you? But see this the thing this why this why it's outside of What the world understand? Because the world know dot the such and such but the world don't know dot the jesus When somebody want to grow when somebody want to change and so that's why I don't play with labels because if i'm a label A random person online. Nope. It's not a q&a amber Come in the room and be quiet And so if if if i'm a late name a random person A a narcissist Didn't that mean i'm a name Your rambunctious child 80 hd That mean i'm a name Your daughter who picture fit after she just was playing nice with the dogs She was playing with a barbie doll and then she couldn't get that not out the hell And she grabbed the barbie doll and hit the barbie doll head on the floor If if if we just oh your child bipolar Oh my good. That's a bipolar disorder. You need this prescription And not even understanding that's That's the human nature Not even understand that's a child Child don't have everything a child need to process emotions The child understand that's a barbie doll The child so the child understand hitting that barbie doll head on that ground ain't hurting that barbie doll But you let somebody tell you oh your child Bpd Oh, she don't like to play with people. Okay npd Okay, you can't get her to sit down. Okay ad hd And this how y'all be You're throwing around labels you're throwing around labels and see i'ma tell y'all something Whoo now this right here what i'm finna tell you this is a heart take now This is a heart take and y'all ain't gonna like this You know why because I tell you all the time and I tell y'all all the time do not praise me Do and in y'all get on my nerves. I'll be about to hang up the phone on you and somebody gonna label this Oh, well that is uh called a covert Narciss Someone who doesn't like praise But the reason why I say Don't praise me is because that's the problem with your pastor Your pastor say somebody make a noise unto the lord You don't have to tell somebody to make a noise unto the lord if the holy spirit is in the room Your pastor say somebody clap Somebody say amen somebody praise the name you don't have to give props Call in response if the holy spirit is in the room But see what the pastor be doing he be intercepting the praise That's why the rappers who work for the devil they get up there and that's why I started Hey, throw your hands in the air Wave on left to right. Hey, and that's why the rappers give the audience a command Because when you throw your hand up and you go to singing You worshiping that artist that's on that stage And that's why people speakers who get on the stage they'll say clap They'll say say amen. They'll say say this say that because they get a high from that praise And see this the thing let me tell y'all something now See somebody here doctors The same way doctors The same way we got doctors right now On netflix for over prescribing and misprescribing and over billing medicaid We got some doctors who know That humans Do not Always believe in god That humans Believe in what they can see So some doctors will give you the term narcissist So that you can wrap your pain up Into a pretty little box with a pretty little bow and have closure And some of those doctors know not all of them But some of them know That if they stoke your fears if they stoke your insecurity And they give you a label that you can hang your hat on That you're going to give them millions of views But see they know that if you take the stands i take And you just don't play around with labels and you just don't throw labels out Whether it's bipolar schizophrenic Narcissist sociopath psychopath you just don't ADHD you don't throw the labels out so people Call it what do I call it? What was it? What was it was life? It was life You went through life You you experienced Somebody operating from their self-hate Why do you need a name for it? Because you want to be able to wrap your mind around it Because you don't want to walk by faith You want to walk by sight You need to have a name To give yourself closure Because you want to understand it But that's what faith is Faith is understanding what you don't understand Faith is going in spite of It's moving forward despite what you didn't experience But see some people know That if they could give a human a bone Just give them a give them a bow to wrap some up in Oh, I got you now And what you don't realize some people are stoke and play With your fears They are stoke and play with your trauma They are stoke and play with it and see the thing is it's a fine line Because there's people that accuse me of that But if you sitting you listen long enough You gonna see That I just tell the truth like it is is I'm not on the man side. I'm not on the woman side. I'm on God side And I don't care who get offended Because I ain't here to placate or to prostilize patronize or pander The truth gonna step on my toes If I'm walking out of line The truth gonna step on your toes if you walking out of line I got 10 more minutes. I got to go. So see this the thing what you got to realize now You can't trust every doctor online Because I'm gonna tell you why because That doctor could have been sitting Doing one-on-one sessions Making a couple hundred dollars a day But then that doctor find a word And it could be any word like narcissists And then they find that that word go viral You not gonna be able to get that doctor off that word Because it's viral That's why until today How long have this word narcissists been trending? The day the first time I done put it in a video title Because I do not want to play With a label Just to stoke people fears and to trigger their trauma and to give them no pretty bow to wrap some up in Because I don't know Who they trying to diagnose with a word And I know that people will take blanket information from social media That is general information and apply it specifically to their situation I have and the reason why I don't play with that is because I done had people hire me for coaching and they say Um, you said this right here in your video. So I did this and I'm like Daddy had nothing to do with what you're going through What so that's what I mean you can mesh around and have diarrhea and you go on google And you say okay What does having diarrhea at 11 p.m. Mean? It pop up Diarrheals a sign of breast council stomach council liver council Don't see the hell I'm sweating it and I had diarrhea and I just googled and then say this breast council And you know great great rum bubble rude that breast How many times that to happen When you took a general something off a line And applied it to your specific situation And see that's like now here. I am exercising more strength. I mean more wisdom Then darkness Because you got darkness online using clinical terms And throwing out clinical terms With all these different explanations and all these different traits and don't even think about the people That is taking that With a minute comprehension skills We barely passed ninth grade comprehension class People people barely could write an essay And now they understand a nurses inside not Barely got through high school And understand every clinical term like they've been practicing medicine for two decades Being the comments with a copy and paste from google and know everything And can you spell the name good on the sat But know everything This ignorance that is ignorance How you finna understand something you read on google? And you barely got through high school That squeak squeak through college by the by the skin of your teeth And not understand narcissism But I'm nursing He did what? Nurses Nurses I'm like, oh my goodness But you know what though The people who be abusing the word online It because they know If you went through that you riddled with trauma They know if they wrap this up and put a pretty bow on it It's gonna be music to your ears Because you don't want to hear That you could be misdiagnosing you don't want to hear that You don't hear it And then what they'll do If they'll call somebody like myself Oh, well, he don't want to just generally diagnose on social media Well, he must be a narcissist Well, Tony, there's a narcissist Because he don't want to just throw the word around like we doing So he must be uh, that's a narcissist This the problem This the problem And so here's the thing We be looking for that pretty bow To wrap them problems up in And say, oh, I got it figured out. I got closure How many times have you lost sleep because you didn't have closure? Closure is something you give yourself You can't expect a label or your offender to give you closure Closure is a decision that you make to move on in your life to love yourself to grow to heal Because see We quit the mislabel We quit the misdiagnosed and guess what? Now everybody say, oh, you need the doctor. You need the doctor How about The doctor went on that man episode And she explained what it is And there's people who did not graduate college Saying that They disagree with the doctor at that point right now I don't know what to tell you At that point, I don't know what to tell you at that point At that point, I'm like, well Okay, so now we finna take our google University And we finna argue with the doctor But we We ain't got no hope now We ain't got no hope But guess what don't nobody know what they talk about include myself Don't none of us know what we talk about But you know what you went through And now you know what you need to do You need to heal You need to grow You need to go You need to sow You need to know You ain't think all that stuff that makes sense to rhyme like that What do we know? Dr. Seuss told you that No, it didn't I'm lying See this the thing You got to stop playing With your emotions And with the heal labels You got to stop trying to diagnose and be a doctor And be focused on your growth Be focused on your healing Stop worrying about closure and close the door So you could grow You see what I'm saying? And so what you don't realize a lot of times I'll be giving you medicine With a little bit of candy And you don't even be catching it Hey, but I got to go I got to coach at eight o'clock because see I'm really in the trenches Doing the work with the people not just no talking head I don't coach four hours a day Four different people and about to do the filth right now Really with the people And so that's why I try to tell you when I bring you this data I ain't writing no outdated old school data out nobody booked It right here now Or what people going through What people experiencing In real time Real life But not leaning on man's knowledge Leaning on God's wisdom And that's what you got to realize and understand Hey, so Buddy with that podcast brain on now Have us a real conversation Let's see what you don't realize though when you work when you work with the Lord you read spirits Everybody don't want to sit down in front of Eric kind of spirit Because the first could tell if your if your spirit could read a spirit They don't want to be around you Hey, God bless you all. I got to go. We'll talk soon