 Hey there friends, how's it going? My name is Kevin, you got anything in there? Anything funky that I should be aware of? Anything that's maybe not allowed over the border? Alright, fair enough, I trust ya. Ah! Okay, well, now that I know I can trust you, we have to stop all the other people who cannot be trusted and are bringing vile contraband into our country. I'm not even sure what we'll be looking for. Weapons, I assume? Counterfeit potatoes? That's the worst thing about being Irish. There's so many counterfeit potatoes. I hate thinking I'm getting a name brand potato and then I open it up and it's a counterfeit. Anyway, I won't go into a rant, but we're about to start a new game. Join me in contraband police. The dream job. Gotta cut the cow to a border crossing. I'm gonna stand. 1981. The Voodoo Las Cue Adrum. I don't know how I slept through this music, to be honest with you, dude. Alright, we're here. Oh my God, were you driving with no hands the entire time? God, Rush is so ahead of us when it comes to self-driving vehicles. I wasn't listening to the dialogue at all, but I'm sure I'll be fine. Thanks for the ride. Oh Jesus, I didn't know you were in there. Why are you just hiding in here? Oh no, the previous border officer was arrested. And in other news, citizens satisfied with the government. As many as nine out of 10 citizens support the actions of the ruling party. Unemployment is falling, salaries are rising and the curfew is now only at 11 p.m. Did somebody get my job? Oh my God, I have the flashlight now. Okay, that makes it official. Sorry. I didn't know this was occupied. I guess I'll just wait for the bathroom. This is the bathroom, right? Cause I didn't see anywhere else. Just leaving all the doors open. Yeah, there is no other bathroom. That must be it. We got some build up here. Is anyone else doing this job or is it just me? Hello, are you gonna let them in? That is a lot of information I gotta get on people. Great, let's get started. Just to be clear, I didn't read that. I'm sure it'll be fine though. Go and make your way right over here. If you can pull up up there, that'd be great. Oh my God, he's getting shouty now. All right, fine. We'll see. I just got a card check and then he's like, no. I've seen your videos. I know what you're up to. That's it, open it up. You'll pay for screaming at me. All right, it seems to be okay. Nothing seems to be out of order with his details. Like if I look here, everything's matching up. So that's good news. Thought that was saying his weight for a second there. 1700 kg. I was like, God, you've lost a lot of weight. Congratulations. All right, inspection finished. You can drive off. Honestly, I just want to see you driving with all the doors open. He rolls up the window. I can't forget to roll up the window before he starts driving. All right, next one. What have we got here? That name doesn't match. There's a spelling mistake. I'm going to confront him on this. I didn't confront him. I just denied him by accident. Just wait for vengeance. What does that mean? All right, just enter. I don't care that much if you come in or not. Wait, hold on. Let's talk about this a little bit. He's getting upset now. Just keep opening all of the doors and boots and everything. Mark at least one actual error. Oh, I didn't actually mark anything. I just said no and handed it back to him. Probably just a typo on his ID. There's going to be something suspicious in this. What are you hauling, huh? There's something here. Ah, gotcha, flat tire. All right, I said vehicle damage. Will I just talk to him now and be like, hey, you got a flat tire. You got to go home. No flat tires in our country. But don't hand it out that window. I wanted to fix it. Now we put it back in. Give me your second ID or I'm just going to deny it. Wait a second. His passport number doesn't match up either. This is just a disaster, Vladislav. You can't come in here like this. Excuse me, sir, how long it'll take as long as I want it to take Vladislav, the poor guy. He's genuinely just coming in, I think. I don't think he's up to any trouble. I'm just giving him a hard time, especially the fact that I opened that boot. Like that's probably going to fall off. We just don't allow people into our country, it would seem. I wouldn't have confidence if I rolled up in this car and just ran over the traffic cone. But the fact that everyone in front of him got denied can't be good. All right, what do we got here? Are these like papers, please? Everything looks like ways. I don't think Republic of Pakistan is a real country. You know what, if you live in a fictional country and I'm going to accept you, you deserve to live in a real country. Welcome to wherever it is we are. The Republic of Ireland. I never fix their hood or anything. They just drive off. Just probably keep an eye on that. All right, I broke even now. It was not going well there. I got fine and I was actually in the negative after a hard day's work. Oh, come on, dude. You can't drive in on that. You know what? I'm sure you can find a garage to fix your car here. Oh, look at how enthusiastic he is. I'm sure you'll find a garage, though, to fix that tire. I'm sure you'll be fine. Oh, and everything actually closed on your car. Now, that is modern technology. He shouldn't be allowed in? What was it? Was it the tire? I'm being sent to my room. Oh, so that's where I am, of course. Acrotistan. Acrotistan, yes, of course. One of my favorite places actually. Acrotistan, Ireland. Two correct checks that's not bad. That's the third. That's the third that I got right. That's good. About as good as I can expect. Oh, we got suspects now. All right, we're looking for WALLENTI. What, no second name? See like a cartoon character and we're looking out for someone in a zaved whatever the hell that is just green car Oh, is that green? No, it's more of a teal. Let him through boys. Get out the fucking car. I'm not searching it You're a suspect and you're you're bad for trying to transport stuff. Oh god. I don't think I'm catching it Wait, wait, we got something counterfeit money. What are you doing with this? Huh? You know, I'll take it as a bribe and leave you through wait. No, it's fake. No Bad person wait a knife. All right, dude. We take counterfeit money very seriously apparently. Oh my god I can actually hurt him. I didn't expect it to work. All right now that I've subdued him I'm gonna start opening up your car if you smuggling this amount of stuff in the seats and he went to that much trouble Why did he have this just hanging under the glovebox? Watch yourself, buddy. All right Oh god, I didn't know the right click hits with the mouse, too. Oh my god. They're filled with I was gonna say crayons I went cigarettes. I don't know why I almost said crayons. What have you got here? Are these fragrant aides? Should I be continuing to hit them? Probably not There we go. I'm letting all the air out of his tires. All right, that's it. You're coming with me I was gonna give him the death penalty, but I guess that's not my decision to make there you go Now you get to watch this guy in the bathroom. Oh my god the blood Send to labor camp labor camp is too fast. God damn it labor camp is always too far, huh? All right, there we go. That's all the contraband we got from his one car that room was empty beforehand Oh my god, I'm getting more tools pitchfork. I just have a burning torch in a pitchfork Ready to kill. Come on come through. Come on put it in H. Come on Fexx sake. I just know he's contraband though. I can smell it like why would you be carrying this truck through here? I did nothing on it coming over the border, huh? Good day Well, you don't tell me what kind of weather we're having. I'm mad with power. All right one second Let me open up the seat. I have no reason to do this, but I destroyed vehicle path. No, this is just foam What are you doing with this counterfeit foam, huh? You think you can just bring this into my country? I'm losing a lot of money here. There's gotta be something you're bringing something into the country I just gotta find it. Nothing. What? Tell me where it is. He's like, what are you talking about? Can I have your documents? I mean you don't really have a choice. I'm holding a pitchfork up to you Okay, I think you're good to go. Um, well, you're not because well, I've destroyed your truck completely I like how he thanked me He's like, God, please stop. This is my livelihood. Paper's clean. There we go I got a hundred bucks for that, but I lost like 200 from all the damage I caused. Oh, this is the guy I don't mean to profile, but you look like a Super Mario villain No, it's not him. This guy's name is Vladimir. I thought it was WALENTY. You know, I kind of tired myself out on the last person. You can just go through. Oh God damn it He shouldn't have been allowed through I checked everything on the first guy and he was innocent. The second guy I just gave him a free pass But no, he was hiding something. That's it. Good cop, bad cop, and I'm bad cop this time Where's the roof of your car? This doesn't look like it's supposed to be a convertible. Wait, I'm getting up on top of his car What am I looking for here? Just cut the brake lines. There we go. You better not be warranty No, he's good. He cannot see where he's going at all. What was his problem? Oh, he had a broken window Well, he didn't have a feckin roof. Did it matter? Oh, and his photo didn't match I didn't even know I should be looking at that. Oh my God. It's warranty. You're coming with me punk. Hit with pitchfork Hit with pitchfork. Oh my God, my pitchfork broke. No crowbar crowbar. Oh, there we go. What? Game lost. I don't understand. You said he was a suspect. They're like, yeah for littering We've opened the border come on through. I just have it permanently up now This is the guy with the contraband again, isn't it? All right. Let me just hold on there We go counterfeit money. You're being arrested Hey, don't close that on me. Hello finish control quickly. Well, you know what? I'm gonna go to the bathroom then I'll be right back. All right guys nature calls The poor people just staring at me. He's in shock. I'm a certain dominance. All right, sir I'm back. What takes you so long? Bowel problems. I'm looking for an excuse to not allow this guy into the country It's gonna be some reason I can deny you. Come on There is literally nothing wrong with this that he is everything above board everything is checked and ready That's it. You're going to jail Your crime is being rude to me and hurting my feelings. The punishment is death. Goodbye Hey, can you clear up this truck? You can just pull it off to the side if you want I would like to keep it for my own personal vehicle. I don't know what this button actually even does I've not been pressing it. Let me give it a try. Oh, it weighs them Okay, so I can check the weights see max weights 1700 kg. Yep. Oh, just you're looking great. How you've lost a lot of weight Congratulations. Oh, no, your passport number doesn't line up, buddy Let's put this as an actual reason like give him a reason for not being allowed into the country because usually I don't say anything I just say denied and I don't explain it. Yeah, it looked like he was gonna put up an argument there He went like yeah, but then I pulled out my switch blade and he backed off pretty quick I think that was the first one. I've actually done right when I told them no a justified review So that is the first time I've gotten that this one's gonna fail on weight. Is it 4,500? Let's see. He's got a smashed window first of all anyway, and I didn't do it for once Why do they always do that like they're playing a Yu-Gi-Oh card It really is just off-putting. The weight is fine. Passport number looks fine Okay, so should I reject him for the window or not? I'm gonna mark it and then I'm gonna say rejected I don't know if that's justified or not. Why? I just gave you the report. I told you for once Just careful with that turning circle Christ almighty and it killed someone over here criminal escape Oh my god, that was warranty wasn't it? You bastard. Oh, he's always one step ahead God damn it. I forgot two very different realities one where I met him and just went hmm You can go home and the other one where I just murdered him with a pitchfork not a bad second day on the job Minus five hundred eighty dollars We need to free up some space at the post those today You're going for a ride your task is transport prisoners to a labor camp and deliver intercepted contraband to the police base I'll remember at least half of that visit the store on way to buy some tools. Okay I'm like, should I write this down or something first? Let's deal with our naughty boys Hey naughty boys They're like, oh, no, what's gonna happen tell you what's gonna happen murders Now no transport necessary. They didn't like that at all All right, let's retry transfer to police care. Oh, we're gonna have such a good ride together It's gonna be a hell of a road trip. You want to come to actually No, yeah, I was thinking that too. Anyway, I best get going moving these prisoners out. Where are they? Oh There you are leave this open I got kind of an honor system going and we are in the middle of the woods So you could probably run but please don't sorry. I've never driven before so I'm just trying to figure this all out I don't really know what I'm doing this should I get yeah I think I need to go back in there and transfer the stuff Maybe you should keep an eye on them. I left the door open for no reason Well, there is a reason but it's just because of who I am as a person there We go got everything and I'll put it into the vehicle there We go they say I'm ready to go even if the door is just hanging open you could jump out at any time and the map Oh god, this isn't Google Maps. I'm here. I need to take a right and then just go straight a right on the fork All of us stay right. Okay. I'm on it. Wait. No don't go on the right side of the car There's no steering wheel over there. Oh short cut hang on guys. Oh Fuck sorry. Sorry Didn't mean to get you whiplash. I apologize They only ran a car off the road as well. They can still see me by the way I just left to the checkpoint off for sex sake just ram it Didn't work hold on guys Probably dead. I got an axe hold on. I'm a man of many talents jack of all trades master of none It just screams at me, please stop. All right, here. We are folks the labor camp That's what you get for smuggling crayons into the country. I'd send to labor camp sent a labor camp There you go mission complete. Happy days. Well, not not for them, but for me happy days It's just getting away at that rock just like They're not even trying. All right. I got to get here So I'll just go forward and take the second left the dirt trail. Can I go on dirt trails? They're my friends again. It's literally those two guys I don't know if it's worth having the labor camp just for those two. We gotta fill that place up We just got to start arresting everyone what? Okay, God damn it. He the same plan as I did I wanted to go this way and clearly the roads fine even though they say it's under construction like he came this way So I looked there's more. I know it's okay. I'm sorry. I'm taking out my frustration on the vehicle I should probably turn off the siren. It would be a bit more peaceful No, that doesn't feel right actually, I think it was the siren making it peaceful. Okay, this dirt track is open I'll go this way. I'm struggling enough to drive on the roads never mind the dirt roads. This is a shop Oh my god, what do they sell the bodies if so I could get your supply line. There's a lot of people I could kill All right, what what are you? Oh my god. Why are you selling scalpels out here? That's scarier than the bodies Give me this branch. Oh god. He's gonna line a customer. Sorry folks I didn't realize there's such a demand for scalpels out in this part of the woods you go ahead Okay, and last stop is the police base. That's him all gathered contraband. Oh, yeah, sure Hold on. I left it in the booth. It's my second day third day. I'm kind of new there We go. I have counterfeit money and an alcohol canister I don't know if it was worth driving all the way out just to give you these there you go And here have this branch on the house. Oh, he doesn't want my branch god dammit I try and extend an olive branch and he just won't take it. All right now back home better reverse without looking I'm here. Oh my god. I went right through our gate. I thought I just stop congratulations. You did well today Yes, lots of driving and all on a single tank of kerosene. This is quite the vehicle Anyway, I best catch some z's and look at the state of the place Fine before I showed up. Ah, yes Sunday April 19th food over production as is tradition in motherland We have too much food. This is not propaganda. This is truth. This is my truth the following products are not loud Food. Oh, yeah, we just do so much of it. He's like this is literally my lunch It's an apple and some crackers. Can I just not too much food in our country already? We are bursting at seeing Jesus look at that flat tire fact in hell I hope you're not hauling anything heavy. Oh Christ almighty unpacking apple great ways You're bringing apples. Yeah, I know what they say an apple a day keeps the doctor away But it also sends you to prison. I'm arresting you. Okay, surely. He can't does have a lot of cargo It's just that say that I won't have to deal with the cargo, but I do Ah, sorry, I didn't mean to come that close to you I'm gonna open these bags one way or another while you're doing this some sick twisted thrill I don't know my upbringing. Maybe that's right. I was a Minecraft youtuber. Show me that contraband I know you have something that's it. All right tire pop. You're not allowed in you can't map out Damaged God damn it. I just go on in there. It's fine. Sorry about the anger. That's just again Who I am is a person it just comes out in flashes of anger go on ahead and enjoy the sightseeing Look at your right just up ahead. You'll see the last two people I dealt with they're in the labor camp. God damn hippies You're not allowed in my country. Oh wait, hold on. How It's flammable substances you want to be more clear on that what's in here. Tell me He must be freaking out. This is highly dangerous even if there was a spark off the mess All right, everything checks out just be careful on the road and there's so many potholes up ahead that Should be returned like I know we specifically told you not to allow food in but he's literally going in with explosive material You just let him in. Oh for fuck's sake. What is this? You're not allowed bring your dogs into my country Careful with the goats. They could just jump out at any point. Yes, that was fine. Okay, my last one of the day Let's go. He's already rolling up with a flat tire. This doesn't look good. Huffy Surely, that's not allowed. I may be willing to accept a bribe though. You know, maybe give me some of that coffee All right, you have one flat tire and I'm gonna say the the food is the issue So denied and the bright side even if you had to drive all night to get back there. He got your coffee All right. Have a good time in Valin Spectre report. Damn it. I'm just gonna try and make my escape This work clearly isn't for me. Oh, I keep coming back. This is horror Here we go, this is my only way out of this job by becoming an axe murderer There we go, I'm fired. All right, we are gonna end it there. I hope you enjoyed Let me know if you want to see more games like this leave a like drop a comment. I appreciate it Thank you so much for watching appreciate you and I hope to see you tomorrow. Bye for now