 Anyway, it's not what romance and love are really about. Romance and love, according to Jordan Peterson, are a young person's game. And the reason for that is, is that the only reason love and romance exists, is to establish the preconditions for procreation, for having kids. So for Jordan, the whole idea is that love sacks. Relationship between a man and a woman are only meaningful because they lead to having children. And this is his evolutionary psychology, right? This is his, we're programmed, you know, and the programming is basically to secure the perpetuity of our genetic makeup, you know, the selfish gene, make sure our DNA gets passed along. And therefore, the motivation for falling in love, for having a romantic relationship, for having a deep romantic love is to have children and to commit to one another for the sake of the children, to stay together so that the children can have a stable upbringing so that they can survive in a difficult cruel world and go on and have children. And so it goes. So the purpose of love, the purpose of romance, is purely biological. It's not about values. He never mentions values. It's not about what this other person does to you. I'm too loud? Oh, I am, you're right. I didn't lower my, sorry about that. I didn't lower my, every video platform I use, I have to adjust the volume. And I was just using teams on Microsoft Teams and they had to ramp up the volume and I forgot to turn it down. So I apologize. Hopefully that's better. So there's no values. There's no shared experiences. We'll see the kind of experiences Jordan thinks are important. But it's also kind of bizarre to me. I mean, I know a lot of old people who fall in love, a lot of old people who have romance. I know a lot of people, old people who can't have kids anymore, who are still in love. I consider myself one of those people. Not gonna have any more kids, but still in love. Kind of an evolutionary waste, isn't it? To go through all that love stuff when you're not gonna have kids. He just says that again, he has this ability to say stuff that just stops people. Well, it's just a precursor to having kids. Well, of course that's the case. And people just buy it. It's all about chemistry. It's all about biology. Again, no values, no choices. No happiness or pursuit of happiness. No life. You're just DNA being reproduced. But it's actually, as you'll see, it's actually worse than that, I think. That's the other thing that seems to be missing from the conversation so often on the left. The purpose of romance isn't lifetime happiness. Whoa, why not? It's exactly the purpose of romance. It's exactly the purpose of romance is happiness. It's, you know, the reason you get together with somebody for a long-term relationship is to enhance your happiness. I mean, it's not, what else is there? But this goes throughout the whole of Jordan Peterson's thinking. Happiness is not something you pursue. Happiness is something that happens to you. And you're lucky if it happens to you and you should cherish the fact that it happens to you. But it's not something you pursue. It's not something you, it's not your purpose. It's not what you live for. And yet, objectivism claims that it is. It is your moral purpose. The whole point of romance, the whole point of being in love is that this person enhances your life. This person validates your values or doesn't validate your values, reflects back your values. This person, you wanna share your life with this person because it's gonna make your life happier. Otherwise, why, why? So it's really, I mean, it's really revealing to his whole view of the world, his view of the essential nature of suffering and relationship to life. Share the title of the, of Jordan Peterson's video. It's Jordan Peterson Romances for Young People. That's the title of the video. Okay, let's keep going. The purpose of romance isn't lifetime happiness. That's, first of all, that's insane. It's insane. It's not just wrong. It's insane. I mean, again, this is the guy, this video has been watched by over a million people. This is the guy that feels auditoriums. He feels stadiums. He's got amazing charisma. He's super smart. But the idea that romantic love, that romance, that marriage, that finding a partner for life, that finding somebody to love and who loves you has nothing to do with happiness is, he says, insane. Why? It's what life is about. It's about the pursuit of happiness. And this is one of the most important realms in which you do that. First of all, that's insane because you're just not going to find a person that's going to make you happy. You're not gonna find a person who's gonna make you happy. But I mean, in a sense that if you're not happy, they're gonna make you happy. But you're gonna find a person that is gonna help you be happy, is gonna help you sustain that happiness. It's gonna enhance your happiness, make your happiness more, greater. Indeed, I don't think, I think being in love dramatically enhances your happiness if it's the right person and if they love you back. Just knowing there's a person out there that you love as much as you do, I think enhances your happiness even if they don't reciprocate. Think about, well, I don't wanna give the plot away, but think, yeah, I won't give the plot away, but just knowing there's somebody in the world that you love is happiness enhancing. So yes, they won't make you happy. You have to make yourself happy by pursuing your values. But part of the way you do that, part of the way you do that is by pursuing love. Part of the way you make yourself happy is by having romance and falling in love. What the person is for to begin with. What's that? That isn't what the person is for to begin with. But second, the purpose of romance is to, is set up the precondition for having children. So what if you don't have children? No romance, no sex, no love, no marriage. What about couples who never have children, who choose never to have children? Is their romance somehow different, tainted, not as good? They don't serve their purpose. It's really, I mean, it really is amazing to me how in this respect, conservative he is and how committed he is to the evolutionary psychology, even in a case where it is, I think, it is clearly wrong, it's clearly wrong. People choose, I don't know how it's possible, not to have children. And yet if we didn't have free will, if we were purely biologically driven, if we were purely driven towards replication, towards having children, then how could you make such a choice? So no, I don't think romance is just a precursor to having children and to setting up a family. Romance is an end in itself. It's an end in itself in a sense that it serves your happiness. It serves your life. It serves your psychological health. It serves to make you a better person. By the way, if you wanna ask questions, if you wanna make comments that I can actually see, then use the super chat. That's the way to do it. Otherwise, I'm basically mostly gonna ignore you. And so put it up there. Lester says, my wife and I celebrated our 53rd anniversary. Wow, that's amazing. I promised to 50 years, as I told my cardiologist, I renegotiated on our 50th anniversary. Good, I hope you're shooting now for at least 75, at least. But you can't have any romance, Lester, because obviously you can't have kids if you've been married for 50 years in this some biological miracle. I guess Abraham's wife had a baby at pretty advanced age. But no, I mean, so romance is out for you. It doesn't exist. It's just a delusion. It's just a pretense. Yeah, I mean, even Sagaan looked skeptical at this point. For having children and doing it properly. And so... Yeah, but now he's nodding. So maybe, maybe, maybe he got it. Maybe he's accepting this. He was a skeptical after all. So, and that's another reason why it's associated with youth. And if our culture is so self-centered that we actually believe that the purpose of romantic relationships is to make the two people who are in the relationship fulfilled and happy. Why not? Again, he just states it. Has he made an argument about why two people in a relationship could not be fulfilled and happy? But for me at least, it's obvious that that's a purpose of having relationship. I mean, having a relationship is a lot of work. Whether you have kids or not, it's a huge amount of work. And there has to be some upside. Now, we'll get to what Jordan views as the upside. But the upside should be happiness. That's ultimately the upside for, hopefully, most of what you do, everything that you do, the integrating factor in your life, the moral purpose of your existence. Completely crazy. No one in the right mind ever thinks that. I mean, the reason that... He just called me crazy and said, I don't, I'm not in my right mind. Easy. No one in the right mind ever thinks that. I mean, the reason that you have a relationship with someone over the long term, it's complicated, but part of it is in sickness and in health. Part of it is that life is punctuated by tragic circumstances of monstrous magnitude, and you're just more robust and resilient. Two of you manning the oars rather than one. So here you get to the essence of Jordan. You get this on a lot of his videos. Life sucks. It throws you these horrible situations. It's just better to have two people deal with those situations just one. Two people can handle it better, can survive better, can support each other better. I mean, to me, this is an argument for having lots of people in a family. Why only two? Why not five? Why not seven? Why not 10? I don't know why I'm picking odd even numbers. I mean, of course, yes, part of the benefit of being married is when bad things happen, you can't support each other. You're there to help each other. You are there to support each other, and that's great. But that's the purpose of marriage. That's the whole point of romance. That's why two people get together. They get together and they're not thrilled. They're not excited. They're not happy. They're not excited about the future together. They're doing the calculus. Or if I get cancer, she'll be there to help me out. All right, well then, yeah, I should marry them. And think about whether you'd marry the person you married if that was the primary calculation. If that was the essence of it. And how does that translate into great sex, right? How does that translate into great sex? I'm having sex with somebody who I think will help me when times are rough. I don't find them attractive, particularly otherwise. You know, they don't make me happy. So they're not bringing joy to my life. But they're there just in case I fall off a cliff and break a leg and I need to be wheeled around in a wheelchair. I mean, the whole thing about sex is that it's a celebration of life. It's this unbelievable intense pleasure which is a concretization of life is great. And you want to have that experience with somebody who you think, who life with is great, who is mirroring back to you in some sense, your values, who is a value in and of themselves, a high value to you, one of the highest to you. That's what makes sex spiritually enjoyable is that I'm experiencing this together with somebody important in my life who makes me happy. Not my caretaker, my insurance policy. And if this is the case, then you could imagine all kinds of arrangements you could put together a contractual that would take care of your, I don't know, your downside and I don't know, multi-families with multiple people, a contract to take care of each other when things are rough, but then to fall into the rest of the time. There's so many things you could be doing. There's so many other, why this monogamous relationship, why sex, why all this, particularly if you're not gonna have kids. Again, particularly if you've had kids they're not gonna have any more kids than no sex because there's no need to sex because there are gonna be no more kids anymore. It's just so malevolent. So anti-happiness, anti-human life really, and so deterministic and tragic. Tragic that so many people are buying into this set of ideas, buying into this philosophy. By the way, if you guys want me to be on Jordan Peterson's show, where he's got a new interview show, then text them, email him and ask him to invite me. I'd love to be on a show, big audience, lots of new people. It this darkness in Peterson is, it's really sad, it's really sad. There are two of you manning the oars rather than one. So that's a huge part of it. And of course, because our culture is also so youth obsessed, we never think about the last half of our life. But the last half of our life is fantastic. I don't get this again. Yes, we're youth obsessed, but there's a reason we're youth obsessed. We're youth obsessed because youth is vitality, youth is health, youth is energy, youth is invincibility. There's a massive, huge benefit to youth, but then there's a massive benefit to being older. Wisdom, including wisdom with forgot sex and wisdom with forgot to relationship and wisdom with forgot to what you want in life and how to achieve your values. And there's wealth, there's comfort, there's a lot of things you don't have when you're young. And even though we're youth obsessed, romance is just as powerful, just as important, just as enjoyable, maybe more so when you're older than when you were young. Huge part of the utility in having a partner is companionship and also the maintenance of sanity. But why companionship? What's the value in companionship? Because what's the value in any companion? Let's say a friend. If it's not happiness, it's just to commissuate together. It's just to not be lonely. Is there no positive value? Is it all negative values? It's just to eliminate the loneliness. So again, this malevolence, this darkness, this trying to reduce pain. Everything is to reduce pain, reduce the darkness in life. When it's companionship is fun, it's enjoyable. It's happiness enhancing. And the same with friendship. Why do we have friends? Because they help make us happy. Yes, it's fun to be with them. It's enjoyable to be with them. It adds to the things that make us happy. And it's, again, it's great to know that people exist to share your values and who you can interact with at the level of friendship. And that makes you a happier person knowing that they exist. When does the happiness part of the show begin? I'm talking about it all the time. What are you talking about? He doesn't talk about it because he negates it. Companionship and also the maintenance of sanity. You need someone around so that every time you manifest one of your uncontrollable weaknesses, they slap you on the side of the head and tell you to behave. So living alone equals going insane. And yes, I actually agree with what he says. Part of living with somebody is they help you align. But it's not like if you're alone, you go insane. It's not like if you're alone, you become horrific. It's, again, the whole, he has this very dog view of individuals, of people. They slap you on the side of the head and tell you to behave. And you do that for each other in a relationship where communication actually occurs. And because of that, the two of you are much less likely to walk into a pit. And you stabilize your household so that you can produce children that won't drive you crazy, that won't drive other people crazy. There's so much wrong with that. So you don't walk into a pit. Life is just about walking into it. What about, so you do that in order to achieve great things so that you achieve great happiness and great success? Children that won't drive you crazy, that won't drive other people. And the fact that you have a stable household guarantees that your children won't drive you crazy and that they won't drive other people crazy? Are your children a pure reflection of how stable your marriage is? No, I mean, none of that is true. Children have free will too. They don't have to be what you wanted them to be. Have a half decent chance of growing up to have fulfilling lives. We're so immature in our response to intimate relationships. See, this is the thing. To him, maturity means recognizing suffering and pits and the bad stuff and recognizing that that's life. Happiness, eh, probably won't happen. If it happens, it's a free, because if you use happiness, it's just an emotion that in some sense is causeless. But if you have a more benevolent view and if you have a respect for free will and if you have a respect for human values, then human beings are constantly pursued of values. In pursuit of values that ultimately make them happy. That ultimately lead them to a fulfilled life, which is a happy life. I can't imagine a fulfilled life that's not happy. You're lying to yourself if you're fulfilled but you're not happy. So it leads them to a fulfilled and happy life, which means a life of achievement, a life of value creation, value attainment. And one of the values that you attain and achieve in a fulfilled successful life is a romantic relationship. And if it's sustained, all the better because a sustained romantic relationship just builds on itself and is better over time and is more fulfilling over time. And the sex is better. So it's, you can see the contrast here. And for Jordan anything that claims, that makes a claim about happiness is superficial. It's non-intellectual. You know, you could link this to existentialism to the impact of German philosophers on him. But that is it. There's a real darkness, a real darkness. And this is the darkness in our culture. These are the ideas that impact the culture, primarily the intellectuals in our culture. You know, he happens to be on the kind of, on the right, on the conservative side of it. But you see the same kind of darkness. He claims the left is about happiness but the left's not about happiness. The left has the same, it's the same kind of attitude as he does. In our response to intimate relationships that it's just a never ending cause of absolute amazement for me. It's like we're stuck, we're stuck in the daydream of a naive 13 year old girl. It's something like that. You have happiness, happiness and romance. That's what we're stuck in. All right, enough of that. Wow. I mean, it's just, Objectivism is so refreshing. So free of this focus on suffering and pits and the bad stuff in life and all the, it truly is liberating. Objectivism is liberating. So I wanna show you, I ran to contrast, right? Talking about love and values. And, you know, just notice the contrast. I mean, it's, it's, person is going. No, I'm clicking the wrong button, there we go. How does the concept of love, love for one another fit into this philosophy? The romantic love I regard as the most properly selfish emotions there is. Properly selfish emotion there is. It's about you. You fall in love with a person because you regard him or her as a value and because they contribute to your personal happiness. There it is. They contribute to your happiness. You couldn't find two thinkers more in opposition with regard to one of the most important topics in life. Love, romantic love, romance. Now you couldn't fall in love with a person by saying, you mean nothing to me. I don't care whether you leave or die, but you need me and therefore I'm in love with you. If someone offered love of that kind, everyone would regard that as a deadly insult. That isn't love. Therefore, romantic love is a selfish emotion. It is the choice of a person as a great value and what you fall in love with is the same values which you choose embodied in another person. That's romantic love and that is profoundly properly selfish. Now any lesser form of love such as friendship, affection is the same thing in effect. You grant a feeling of affection to those whom you have concluded are values. Your response to others is on the basis of values and if they're no good, then you feel the appropriate emotion of contempt. Are values absolute? Is it either good or evil? Is there any area in between? They depend what you mean. On which value? I would say values are contextual. They depend on the context of a given situation. Now there are unfortunately too many people who are part good, part bad. Well, that's their problem, but what morality would demand of them is to struggle to the best of their ability to be good and never do evil consciously. If a man does that, I would regard him as completely good. If he never does evil consciously and deliberately. However, if he does just one action which he knows to be wrong, but permits it to himself, then he's evil absolutely. The rest is only a matter of time. All right, there you have it. I think you can see the contrast, the difference in attitude, not just a love and romance, to values, to life generally. And the reason I didn't stop the Iron Man video is because what is there to add? She's absolutely right. What we need today, what I call the new intellectual, would be any man or woman who is willing to think. Meaning any man or woman who knows that man's life must be guided by reason, by the intellect, not by feelings, wishes, wins, or mystic revelations. Any man or woman who values his life and who does not want to give in to today's cult of despair, cynicism, and impotence and does not intend to give up the world to the dark ages and to the role of the collectivist broods. All right, before we go on, reminder, please like the show. We've got 163 live listeners right now, 30 likes. That should be at least 100. I figure at least 100 of you actually like the show. 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