 Good morning, I would not be around when you read this letter Don't get angry on me. I know some of you truly cared for me loved me and treated me very well. I Have no complaints on anyone It was always with myself. I had problems. I Feel a growing gap between my soul and my body And I have become a monster. I Always wanted to be a writer a writer of science like Carl Sagan At last this is the only letter. I'm going to write. I always wanted to be a writer a writer of science like Carl Sagan I loved science stars nature But then I love people without knowing that people have long since divorced from nature Our feelings are second-handed. Our love is constructed Our beliefs colored our originality valid through artificial art It has become truly difficult to love without getting hurt The value of a man was reduced to his immediate identity and nearest possibility to a vote to a number to a thing Never was a man treated as a mind as a glorious thing made up of stardust In every field in studies in streets in politics and in dying in living I'm writing this kind of letter for the first time My first time of a final letter Forgive me if I feel to make sense My birth is my fatal accident. I Can never recover from my childhood loneliness the unappreciated child from my past Maybe I was wrong all the while in understanding world in understanding love pain life death There was no urgency, but I was always rushing Desperate to start a life all the while some people for them life itself is cursed My birth is my fatal accident. I can never recover from my childhood loneliness the unappreciated child from my past I'm not hurt at this moment. I'm not sad I'm just empty Unconcerned about myself That's pathetic. That's why I'm doing this people may dub me as coward and selfish or stupid once I'm gone I'm not bothered about what I'm called. I don't believe in after-dead stories ghosts or spirits If there is anything at all I believe I believe that I can travel to the stars And know about the other worlds if you who's reading this letter can do anything for me I have to get seven months of my fellowship one lakh and seventy-five thousand rupees Please see to it that my family's paid that I have to give some forty thousand to Ramji He never asked them back, but please pay that to him from that Let my funeral be silent and smooth Behave like I just appeared and gone do not shed tears for me Know that I'm happy dead than being alive From shadows to the stars Uma Anna, sorry for using your room for this thing To ASA family. Sorry for disappointing all of you. You love me very much I wish all the very best for the future For one last time Jay Bheem, I forgot to write the formalities. No one is responsible for this act of killing myself No one has instigated me Whether by their acts or their words to this act This is my decision and I'm the only one responsible for this Do not trouble my friends and enemies on this after I'm gone