 Good morning, my beautiful internet friends. Welcome back. Thank you for joining me here today. A few days ago, I released a video where I was extremely emotional and having a very hard time and I'm not gonna lie, I was super uncomfortable doing that. Yes, I am talking very fast. And I legitimately avoided looking at comments or opening up the YouTube app or anything like that for a solid 24 hours, because I was like, yeah, what have I done? What have I done? What have I done? But as per usual, you were truly amazing to me and sent me messages of encouragement and commented beautiful, encouraging things. And let me know that I wasn't alone. I know so many of you guys are struggling as well. And I just wanted to start off by saying thank you so much. I have a lot of really cool videos coming up for you guys. A lot of them that are mostly edited, but I didn't wanna like launch into more of those. Like the video from yesterday with Chris Oliver from the Amplife without kind of checking back in with you and letting you know that I am okay, that I will be okay, that things are a roller coaster of emotion. But one thing I wanted to talk about today was some more cool moments I had. And I think one of the weirdest things about this time in my life right now is that there are like such high highs and then just real low lows. And as I've talked to my therapist about it, kind of the goal is for like the highs and the lows to eventually kind of equalize and get a little more like kiddie pool waves and less like the fricking middle of the ocean which I feel like I'm in right now. But a couple of days ago, this happened. So I'm waiting for my French press coffee to be ready, but I think I want to walk into my Toastmasters group. Here's the thing, I haven't been there in about five months, maybe four months. I used to be the president of this Toastmasters Club. Toastmasters for those of you who don't know is a public speaking club organization. I'm a public speaking nerd, so I love it. But I took a temporary hiatus from the club for a while for financial and surgical reasons. And I want to go back today now that I'm feeling a little better, things are a little bit more stable. And I think I'm gonna try to walk with no assistance in there because it's a pretty short jump from the car into the club room. We're just gonna see how it goes. I'm trying to figure out the logistics because this could be a terrible idea. All I need is like a cane. I don't need a full blown crutch anymore. I just need a cane for short distances, but I don't have one. Maybe I'll have to try to remedy that somehow. Check this out guys, I'm just grabbing my backpack and my cup of coffee, walking like a normal person. Out to my car! Amazing how easy it is to feel joy in the stupid little things because they're not stupid, they're amazing. I do need my purse though. Without knocking over my coffee. Mission success. This is an attractive angle. By the way, guys, I went to a movie last night and someone outside the movie theater was just literally handing out roses. No motivation, no, not selling anything, not wanting to convert me, just handing out pretty little roses. I thought it was really sweet. People can be pretty great sometimes, oftentimes actually. Something I think would be pretty cool about returning to Toastmasters now is the fact that I, like they'll call you up for speeches or for impromptu, like two minute little segments where you have to stand up and speak and when that would happen I'd have to go through like a whole kitten caboodle process of trying to either get up on crutches or more likely strap into the eyewalk, which only takes eight seconds or so, but it's still like eight seconds is a long time when everyone's waiting for you and trying to like adjust my straps in front of an audience of people was not the most comfortable thing. So now I might actually just be able to like stand up and walk to the front of the room, limping, but not much. Let's do this. I did it, guys. I was able to walk in and do the meeting and I even stood up in front of people and gave a quick impromptu speech all without a crutch or a cane or anything. And I just walked with my friends out just literally walking on my own two feet and I felt normal. Like it just felt kind of normal for a second. Not super painful. Like we're getting there. We're actually really getting there. And holy crap, I'm so excited. I was gonna go home to continue work but I just pulled up my favorite coffee shop and figured I might as well try to make a day of this and see if I can keep the trend going of walking without a crutch. Short distances, simple little steps. Get some coffee and get some work done with two legs. And it was amazing. I went a whole day without using crutches. When I left the house, I went to my Toastmasters which is public speaking meeting and walked in and then I went to a coffee shop and walked in and it's such a cool feeling to be able to do that. I can't tell you like the weight it takes off just to be able to stand up from a table and like go grab your coffee from the counter without like strapping into an eye walk or getting crutches up and then like walking on crutches like with your coffee cup in your hand which I am a pro at. I've actually never dropped a cup of coffee while walking on crutches. I probably have. That's actually probably not true. I'm probably just not remembering at this moment. I probably blocked it out of my memory but it's so, it's so awesome to have those moments. Now right now my leg feels horrible and I haven't been able to wear my prosthetic in two days but hey, I'm in the middle of the ocean. What do we expect? It's gonna be good and then it's gonna be bad and then it's gonna probably be okay eventually. This was a really, really cool moment this past week and I feel like I'm able to see every day a little bit more things that could be coming up for me that doesn't erase the fact that this is really hard but it certainly helps and along with that, oh please don't judge me for this or do. I mean, I wouldn't blame you for it. Here's the situation guys. There's something that has been bringing me a lot of joy in my life recently and I wanna just keep doing all day long but I have work so I can't. I used to watch videos here on YouTube of people making fun of people who did TikTok because TikTok's an app if you don't know and a lot of the YouTubers who I like will do commentary on funny things and they make fun of people who do TikTok and I was like, ha ha ha, isn't that so funny? Those videos are stupid and ridiculous and dumb and then I joined it and I realized it's really fun to do and so I've been making TikTok videos that are really stupid like these when people ask. Why do you only have one leg? Why do you have two? Weird. How to put a leg on. Step one, leg lube. Step two, giant weird rubber thing. Step three, find a leg. Then you have two feet. To everyone asking me how I lost my leg. Three words. Great. White. Fishes dog attack. I didn't eat my green vegetables. Listen to your mom. It's really fun. I've never thought of myself as a funny person in the least but it's so fun to make stupid little fun videos making fun of the stupid little fun things in life that I'm dealing with right now and it's been therapeutic and it just brings me a lot of joy. So I'm on there if you're on there and I wanna check me out, I don't know. And last but not least, I've been painting again. If you were on my painting live stream a couple of weekends ago, you'll know that this is happening but I have a thing that I do every year for Christmas and this year I'm opening it up to you guys. So here's a little, I'm gonna call it a promotional video for it but it's really just art set to music and I'll explain at the end what's going on. Our show. So that painting that you saw and these paintings that you see on screen right now are little snowman families that I make every year for my friends, for my family. And a couple of years ago, I opened it up to people on Facebook. It was like, hey, does anyone want me to make some of these for them? And they did. And so I've kind of made it a tiny little side business over the years and I figured I'd open it up to you guys this year. In the link in the description down below, I can't talk today. In the description down below, you will find a link to be able to order one for yourself or your friend or your family. They are all completely painted handmade by yours truly. If you're interested, check it out. And as long as ordering is open, they will all be delivered by Christmas to you where you live. Thank you for listening guys. Thank you for caring about the stupid, fun little things and the really hard things too. Thank you to my patrons over on Patreon for helping make all of these videos possible, and helping to support us. If you're interested in Patreon, here's a link that you can check out right here and see what that's all about. But I love you guys, I'm thinking of you and I will see you in the next video. Bye guys. Hey. And her from the sky.