 The Mutual Broadcasting System, in cooperation with Family Theatre Incorporated, presents Substitute Santa, starring Frank McHugh and James Burke. Ray Maland is your host. More things are wrought by prayer than this world dreams of. Our happiness so often comes from little things, the simple deeds, the daily thoughtful acts of kindness, the words of encouragement we can and should give to one another. These things mean so much, especially at home where appreciation and gratitude may often be forgotten because, well, because it is home and we just take for granted the kindness and encouragement that is given. It's sad to see a home where words of thanks are forgotten or where there's distrust and constant quarreling because home was meant to be the happiest place in the world. And it can be with God's help and in a home where there is the daily practice of family prayer, the daily expression of thanks to God, there is always a new appreciation of members of a family for one another, a new spirit of thankfulness and happiness. We will hear from Ray Maland later in the program. Now Family Theatre presents Substitute Santa, starring Frank McHugh with James Burke. Featherstone's department store? Yes, madam. All complaints on purchases must be made in person. Sorry. Featherstone's department store? Yes, we deliver in your suburb. Right up to Christmas Eve. You're welcome. Featherstone's department store? Yes, sir. That's right. The one millionth person entering our toy land will receive as a Christmas present any article on sale in our store. Yes. Yes, sir. A mink coat, a diamond ring, anything. Well, most any day now. You're welcome. Featherstone's department store? Oh, Mr. Featherstone? Yes, Mr. Potter, to your office immediately? Yes, sir. I'll stop paging him right now. You're welcome. Mr. Archibald Potter, report to Mr. Featherstone's office. Now what does old Featherstone want? Grigsby, if they ever want you to be the manager of this store, walk. Do not run to the nearest exit. Don't worry, Mr. Potter. I'm not after your job. I have trouble enough right here in the toy department. You have troubles. I'll match troubles with you any day, Grigsby. Oh, Mr. Grigsby. Mr. Grigsby. Yes, Mrs. Lee? Santa Claus is ill. He's what? He's indisposed. He's not feeling well. Santa Claus has a tummy ache. Oh, no. No. He can't do this to me. Mr. Archibald Potter, report to Mr. Featherstone's office right away. There's Featherstone again. Mr. Potter, if Santa Claus. Grigsby, that's one of your troubles. I have troubles of my own. Chin up. Carry on. Mr. Potter, report immediately to Mr. Featherstone's office. Yes, sir. I'm coming, F.W. I'm coming. If nothing else happens, I'll... Oh! I'm sorry. I'm awfully sorry. I beg your pardon. Did I hurt you? No, no. I'm all right, really. That's my fault. It really is. I should have watched where I was going. No, I wasn't watching either. Wait. I'll pick up your packages. I hope I didn't break anything. No, no. There's nothing fair, Jily, in any of them. Just a few trinkets. Some of the things that we don't have in England. Oh, you're from England. Here, oh, here, here. I think that's all your packages. Thank you. Well, well, you're from England. Well, what do you know? Well, we import a great many things from your country. I'm Archie Potter. I'm the manager of Featherstone. Oh, interesting. So you see, I shouldn't go around bumping into people. Miss, uh... Miss, uh... You said that your name was, uh... Mr. Potter, please report immediately to Mr. Featherstone's office. Please! There it goes again. All right, all right. Oh, wait, look, look. You're, uh, you're coming into the store again, aren't you? Oh, yes, yes. I'll be here every day until... Until I find what I'm looking for. Oh, that's wonderful. I'll be seeing you then. Well, I, uh... I've got to run now. Uh... Oh, goodbye. Goodbye, Mr. Potter. Goodbye. She's beautiful. She's lovely. She's gorgeous. She's exquisite. Who's that? Archie Potter. Come in. Oh, yes, sir, yes, sir. Uh, did you want to see me, Mr. Featherstone? Yes, for the last half hour. I've been having a little trouble downstairs. You're having trouble? Come up and match trouble with me sometime. Look here, Potter. You're the one who talked me into giving a Christmas present to the millionth visitor to Toyland. Yes, F.W. I'm proud to say that was my idea. Well, I've been thinking it over and I don't like it. What, F.W., are you okayed it? I know I did, but it's going to cost us too much money. His choice of anything in the store. What's the most expensive article we sell? Well, let me say. Probably that mink coat in the fur department. It sells for an even $4,000. $4,000? Suppose the lucky person is a woman. Suppose she picks that mink coat. Then we'll give it to her. We'll give it to her just like that. Look, F.W. We've already got more than $4,000 worth of advertising out of this. Newspapers all over the country have played it up. And all the newspapers and towels send reporters and cameramen to cover it. That's all well and good, but just the same... And we've sold more than $4,000 worth of merchandise on account of it in the toy department alone. Our sales are up at least $30,000. Well, that's encouraging. But I still hope she doesn't pick the mink coat. F.W., haven't you any Christmas spirit? Why should I? Nobody ever gave me anything? I've worked hard for every penny I've made. I've never found a Santa Claus... Oh, speaking of Santa Claus, that reminds me. May I use your telephone? Go ahead. Miss Carter, this is Potter speaking. Will you connect me with the toy department? Thank you. What's the matter now? Santa Claus isn't feeling well. He hasn't got anything on the way I feel. Oh, hello. This is Potter. May I speak to Mr. Grigsby? Oh, hello, hello, Grigsby. He is? Is that so? Oh, yes, yes. Do that. Do that. I'll be down just a few minutes. What's wrong? Santa Claus just taken at the hospital. It looks like appendicitis. Well, that's a fine thing. And now what are we going to do? Oh, it's already been done, F.W. Grigsby, that nice-looking young chap in the toy department. He's offered a substitute for Santa. He's putting on Santa's outfit now. Grigsby, eh? Will he want anything extra for it? Well, it wouldn't hurt to give him a little extra. Look here, Potter. You're mighty free with other people's money. Well, I better get down and help, Grigsby. Oh, that's seven floors on the head house. Everything's been happening down here today. Why doesn't something good ever happen here? Well, it does. This morning, not just this morning, I bumped into F.W. She's gorgeous. She is the most beautiful. What are you talking about? She makes you think of white rose petals on black velvet. And she walks like a spring breeze in a field of daffodils. Who? Well, the young lady I bumped into. And as dainty, as dainty as a Dresden China doll. I hope you didn't break her. Oh, no. No, no, I didn't. I just came around the corner, and there she was. And then she came around the corner, and there I was. And we sort of collided. F.W. Do you believe in love at first sight? Potter, stop making daisy chains out of my paperclips. Oh, I'm sorry. Excuse me, I'm sorry. And she's about five feet, too. Eyes of blue. No, no, no, they're more like an amethyst. And she walks like a spring breeze in a field of daffodils. Oh, then you've seen her. No, I haven't seen her. I'm quoting you. Potter, just how does a spring breeze walk in a field of daffodils? Go ahead, show me. Well? Oh, she knocks over her strays, too, eh? I'm sorry. I'm sure I didn't see it. You'd better get out of here. Your spring breeze is too much like a tornado. All right, F.W. I'll be back later. She does walk like a spring breeze. Get out of here. I see you're doubling in whiskers. Yes, Mr. Potter. Somebody ought to take Santa Claus's place, and I like kids, so I volunteered. Good for you. But can you laugh like Santa Claus? You know, Santa has a deep, hearty laugh. Can you give us that? I don't know. I have a lot of worries on my mind, but I'll try. How's this? Ho, ho, ho, ho. Oh, Grigsby, Grigsby, you can do better than that. Look, for a good, hearty laugh, I'll get you an extra $50. Well, that's different. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. Oh, good, good, you've got it. Now you go out there and climb into Santa's sleigh and go to town. Yes, sir. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. Oh, Anna Boy, Santa Anna Boy. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Well, that's settled. I wonder if I'll see her again today. She said she'd be coming back. Ha. Oh, look, Jackie, here's Mr. Potter. Good afternoon, Mr. Potter, sir. Well, well, Mrs. Jones and Jackie, too. Hi, Jackie. Say hello to Mr. Potter. Hello, Mr. Potter. Mr. Potter is the manager of this store. Oh, he works here, too. Yes, Jackie. I work here just like a mother does. She cleans at night with a mop and a scrubbing brush, and I spend the day trying to keep it clean. Confidentially, hers is a better job. I think so, too. Jackie. Mr. Potter, I brought Jackie down to see Santa Claus. Oh, yes. Well, Jackie, there he is. Way over there at the other end of Toyland. Oh, yeah. I see him now. He doesn't look as fat as he did last year. Well, Santa has worried a lot lately. Some of his little girls and boys haven't been so good. Oh, I've been a good boy. Yes, Jackie's been a very good boy, Mr. Potter. Oh, wouldn't it be wonderful if he were the millionth person to enter Toyland? It certainly would. Jackie, if you could have anything you wanted in the whole store, what would you pick? A cowboy suit. Well, for FW's sake, let's hope you're the one. By the way, Mr. Potter, what's happened to the winter display we always have at Christmas time? Which one, Mrs. Jones? The one that shows the Christ child in the manger and the bright star and the wise men. Oh, you mean the nativity scene? Well, don't we have that one this year? No, we don't, sir. Well, now that you mention it, I don't remember seeing it. Why, that window was traditional at Featherstones. The window tremors will hear about this. Oh, maybe I shouldn't have mentioned it. I'm glad you did, Mrs. Jones. I'll have that window set up tonight. Oh, that'll be fine. It's such a beautiful scene. Hey, Mom, come on. Oh, all right, Jackie. He's getting impatient, so I guess I'd better go. I'll see you tonight, Mrs. Jones. You too, Jackie. Let's see now. She might be down on the fourth floor in the dress department. They don't have dresses like that in England. Yes, I think I'll get down there. He's on the floor harder before the reception goes on. Oh, there he goes again. All right, F.W., a head as light as a feather and a heart as hard as a stone. That's Featherstone. Well, everything's on your control, F.W. Grigsby makes a fine substitute, Santa. He's laughing his head off. What's he so happy about? I promised him an extra $50. Stop giving away my money. Grigsby deserves it, F.W. Well, maybe he is helping business. All right, give it to him. That reminds me, when will the millionth person enter Toilet? Well, at the rate they're coming in, it ought to happen about noon tomorrow. We'd like to have you there, F.W. I'll be there. I want to kiss that $4,000 mink coat goodbye. Of course, not many people know that we have a $4,000 mink coat here, do they? Oh, yes. It's in the front window. What? Yes. It's been there all week. Oh, why did I ever own a department store? And speaking of windows, do you know that somebody forgot to set up our nativity window? You know, window number 12. I hate to pull out that merchandise display for something that doesn't bring us any business. After all, it's Christmas. Listen, F.W., that star-spangled Christmas tree you have in the main lobby, that's not Christmas. Even the seventh-floor toyland with sandy claws. That's not Christmas. But that little scene in Bethlehem, that's Christmas. The real Christmas. Potter, there isn't a window trimmer at this late date. I'll fix it myself tonight. And I'll buy myself if I have to. Someday you're going to turn the wrong corner. Potter, have you seen your spring breeze blowing around anymore? No, no, I haven't, F.W., but I'm hoping. She has a voice like music in the moonlight. And her eyes, they're so deep, you could fall right in and drown. Potter, don't let this infatuation run away with you. Remember, your first love is Featherstone's department store, F.W. I have enough troubles without reminding me of that. Oh, Mr. Potter, that window's going to be beautiful. I didn't know you could trim windows, too. Well, Mrs. Jones, to tell you the truth, I didn't know I could either. But the subject like the nativity, you know, it's inspiration. Oh, it's just like a beautiful picture, the manger and the little Christ child and the bright star. I wonder if Jackie succeeded in finding some straw. Then we'll be finished. Mr. Potter, don't you think that Mary, the mother, should be closer to the manger, sort of bend and over like? Mrs. Jones, you're right. I'll fix that. Here's some straw, Mr. Potter. I found something in a box. Oh, thank you, Jackie. That's just the right kind of straw. Mrs. Jones, I'm afraid we're making a mess for you to clean up. My land, Mr. Potter. That's what I'm here for. See, Jackie, he's putting the straw in the manger around the little Christ child. Yes, Jackie. This shows you what happened many, many years ago in a little town called Bethlehem. Was he a real baby? Oh, yes, yes, indeed, Jackie. This is one Christmas story that's real and true. That's what I was talking to Jackie about this afternoon, Mr. Potter. Yes, Christmas is the birthday of the infant Jesus. That's the real meaning of Christmas, Jackie. Mrs. Jones, you're a very devout person. And why shouldn't I be? I'm on my knees the whole night through. And I try to pray just to sincerely with a scrubbing brush in my hand as I do with my prayer book. Mr. Potter, when I brought the straw in, I noticed something. There's a man in one of the show windows. A man? Well, we don't have any window tremors working tonight. Well, there's a man in one of them. Which one? That big window down there. Well, that's where the furs are. Why, there's a 4,000? You wait here, Jackie. I'm going to go and take a look. And I'll go with you, sir. And I'll take my mop along just in case. Yes, yes, all right. Come on, butt everybody down. Be careful. I cannot imagine how a man got in unless he hid in the store. Maybe that's what he did. We'll soon find out. This is the window. Now, you chase him out. Get ready. Oh, hello, Potter. Why, hello, Mr. Featherstone. It's you. Well, who did you expect? Miss Hush? It's all right, Miss Jones. It's the old man. No, it's Mr. Featherstone himself. No, sure. And I was all ready to knock somebody for a home run. FW, what are you doing in the fur window? I was looking at this $4,000 make. Is that it? That's it. It doesn't look so wonderful. Well, here's one for $325 that looks so much like it, you can hardly tell the difference. Well, the cheaper one is a copy of it, in imitation make. It's a good imitation. And it's a good coat, but that's not the real thing. I see. Well, you don't have to put a spotlight on this $4,000 one. It's too conspicuous. That's the first thing somebody's going to think of when he has choice of anything in the store. Well, we're trying to sell a coat before that happens, FW. That's the only $4,000 coat we have. If we can sell it, then we won't have to give it away. I never thought of that. Put two spotlights on it. Oh, OK, FW. Say, Mom, is that old man Featherstone? Hush, Jackie. Yes, this is the man who owns the store. Who's this? This is Mrs. Jones of the cleaning department. And this is my boy Jackie. My mother says you're a fine man. Well, she does, eh? She says you give a lot of work to a lot of people. Yes, I guess I do. But she says you're a lonely old codger, too. Jackie. Never mind him, Mr. Featherstone. The boy is right, Mrs. Jones. I am a lonely old codger. Mom, why don't we invite Mr. Featherstone over to our house for Christmas dinner? Oh, no, Jackie. Mr. Featherstone already has a place to eat Christmas dinner. Yes, of course. I always eat Christmas dinner at my club. But thank you, just the same. Come on, Jackie. We mustn't bother Mr. Featherstone. And besides that, I've got the main lobby to scrub. Bye, Mr. Featherstone. Goodbye, Jackie. Mrs. Jones, Christmas dinner, eh? Do you suppose the boy meant it? I'm sure he meant it. They'd enjoy having me. Well, certainly they would. They're real people. You're not a millionaire to them. You're just a lonely old codger. Well, Potter, you might as well get back to your Christmas winter. I saw it from outside. It's mighty nice. Wow. Well, thanks. All right, FW, I'll go back and finish it. Do that. Hm. A $4,000 mint coat and a $325 coat that looks just like it. Now, if somebody accidentally switched the price tags on those two coats just for one day, who would know the difference? Then if somebody picks the $4,000 one, it would only cost us $325. Why not? Oh, Featherstone, that's what's wrong with you. You're always thinking about money. That's why you're a lonely old codger. Back, folks. Let the people get into the toilet. Don't crowd, please. Don't crowd. Remember, there are children here. Potter, are we getting near the furniture? Oh, they are at W. I was afraid you'd miss it. One at a time, please. Go through the turnstile in single file. Yes, we're counting the last hundred. It'll happen any minute now. Good. I'll be glad to get it over with. Oh, yes, yes. It's been great, FW. Oh, look. Look, there she is. Oh, what are you talking about? That's her. That's her. That's the girl who, uh, oh, you mean the spring breeze. Say, she's all right. FW, she's getting in line. She's coming in a toy land. Oh, if she could only be the one millionth person. Potter, that sort of thing only happens in books. Well, she's one in a million, of course, if she could only be the one in this billion. Miss Potter, what's the count? 75. 75, 76, 77, 70. It could be, it could be, then nine, 80. She's getting closer. 81, 82. 83. She'll never make it. 84, 85. 86. It's going to be close. 7, 88. She's lying. 89. 90, 91. You know how to pick them. 92, 93. She's not bad. 94. 95. Oh, I'm afraid. 96 and 7. I'll never be the same again. 98, 99. One million. She made it. I read her advertisements. You're the one millionth person handling our toy land. I know I can find out your name. I'm Margaret Allen. Mrs. Ormiss, I hope. That's wonderful. And you're from? I'm from Liverpool. That's marvelous. Ladies and gentlemen, I have the happy pleasure to announce that the one millionth person entering toy land is Miss Margaret Allen of Liverpool, England. Will you pose for a picture, please? Yes. I'm so bewildered by all this sudden attention. I really am. Hold on, Potter. I want you in this picture, too. After all, I'm only the owner of the stall. Oh. Oh, yes, yes. Excuse me, Mr. Allen. This is FW Featherstone himself. I'm very pleased to meet you, Mr. Featherstone. How do you do, young lady? Now, you fellows with the cameras, be sure you get all three of us in. Hold it. Hold it. Now, hold it. Hold it. There. Thanks, fellas. Thanks. Now, young lady, what do you want for Christmas? I don't understand. Well, it's like this, Miss Allen. For being the one millionth person entering toy land, you get your choice of any article on sale in the store. Oh, goodness. You mean any article I want? Yes. Anything from a stick of gum to a $4,000 mink coat. Yes, or yes, anything you want. I know what I want. I don't know whether I'll ever be able to use it, but this is what I want. A wedding gown. A wedding gown? You shall have the best wedding gown in the store. Better than that, I'll include a complete wedding crew so. Oh, Mr. Fetherson, I don't know how to thank you. Well, wait, what I would like to know is, who is the lucky man? Well, I don't know. You don't know? You see, in England during the war, I met an American soldier. I fell in love with him. We planned to be married on Christmas Day, but he was called away from England. Oh, well, that was a tough break. While he was gone, my home in Liverpool was stuck by a bomb. Oh, I spent months and months in the hospital. And when I got out, I was well physically, but I couldn't remember anything. Amnesia. Well, that's what they called it. I couldn't even remember the name of my sweetheart. I'm sure if I see him, I'll know him until all come back. But how did you happen to come in here to Featherstone? Well, I found a letter in my belongings. It was just signed. Joe, but I'm sure it was from him. And he said in his letter that when the war was over, he'd go back to his old job at Featherstone. We have a lot of returned soldiers here. Half of them are named Joe. I started coming here yesterday. I intended to go to every department of the store and see if I could find him. Well, if he's in the store, we'll find him for you. Miss Allen, I'm from the Daily Gazette. Would you mind posing with Santa Claus while we take a picture? That's a good idea. You know, Potter, giving this Christmas present and making this young lady so happy has made me feel good, too. That's the fun you've been missing, F.W. Come on, Miss Allen, Santa Claus over here. Oh, and what do you want, little man? Here you are. Here's Santa Claus, Miss Allen. Climb right into the sleigh with him. Come on, F.W., you give in, too. You've been kind of a Santa Claus store. Margaret. It's Margaret. Margaret Allen. Makes me do you know this girl? I know her. I hunted all over England for her. Grigsby. Joe Grigsby. Margaret. Why, Potter, I thought you... Oh, my dream girl. And what happens? She marries Santa Claus. And a substitute Santa at that. Substitute Santa starred Frank McHugh as Mr. Potter, with James Burke as Mr. Featherstone. Now, here is your family theater host for tonight, Ray Mulan. This is the age of invention, the day of scientific discovery. There are discoveries in atomic power and supersonics. There are inventions for super planes, super bridges, super buildings, and millions of other inventions that find their way to farms, factories, and homes. No one questions the progress made in things scientific and intellectual. But what about the simple art of living together and the simplest art because it's so fundamental, the art of living together as a family? In a land of freedom, each man's home is his castle. A home isn't only built of stone or bricks or walls or roof. It's built with the spirit of a boy and girl who pledged their unchanging love in the sacred bond of marriage. And where there's God's blessing in the daily practice of family prayer in the home, it is in truth an unchanging love because the family that prays together stays together. Before saying good night, I'd like to thank Frank McHugh and James Burke for their performances this evening. Our thanks to Harry Lawrence for writing tonight's play and the max tear for his music. This production of Family Theater Incorporated was directed by David Young. Others who appeared in tonight's play were Oona Mordeshed, Margie List, Joe Graham, Bob Rockwell, Gwen Delano, Phil Bernard, and Bob Young. Next week, our Family Theater stars will be Johnny Johnston and Catherine Grayson in a rose by any other name. And your host will be Don Amici. This is Ray Merland saying good night and God bless you. This series of the Family Theater broadcasts is made possible by the thousands of you who felt a need for this kind of program by the mutual broadcasting system which has responded to this need. And by a friend of the New York Foundling Hospital which cares for homeless and motherless babies without distinction of race, creed, or color. Be with us next week at the same time when our Family Theater stars will be Johnny Johnston and Catherine Grayson with Don Amici as host, Tony LaFranco speaking. This is the Mutual Broadcasting System.