 It was not my plan to sit here again, but I'm happy that I have the chance for today. The issue with the fear is a big issue for me. In the last four weeks I have dealt with a lot of sickness, anger and fear. I've been sick for so long, I really want to get rid of it. With the fear I discover, even if I have a sword, I get fear. To ask a question, I'm a little bit helpless what to do. I want to send the fear away, but it is just like sticky stuff. What to do to get out the fear of my body? I want to get rid of it. You spoke about illness, you spoke about fear and you spoke about anger. The thing is that the illness comes because of the fear and anger in the system. It's not the other way around that you're ill and that's why you're afraid and angry. It's because there's fear and anger, it keeps on taking over. You allowing it to happen to you, then at one point the illness will come. There's no way around it. It has to happen that when it happens that way each time. The thing is, why is that fear and that anger there? Now in your case, you have suddenly come across a teaching which tells you, no, don't go into the cosmic experience. It's great and fine, but you're going to have to come back into the body anyways. You're going to have to deal with this reality around anyways. So that's not the place to go, be here, be present. Remember, your actions are governed by the ego and when they are governed by the ego, by the ahankar, you're in trouble. So try to move into a state where your actions are governed by the truth of your being. Then you started to implement this teaching. You started to practice it, to try to practice it. The sadhana, the practice you started and then the shaking starts. The fear and the anger start because your system has been operating largely from the ego all your life, except for your early years. Yes. And you grew up in a culture which ensures that the socialization process is so well organized that the human being becomes the perfect instrument to serve the main institutions of that society. Of course, every society needs human beings to serve their institutions. That's not what I'm questioning or what I'm bringing up here. You have to serve the institutions of the place in which you're born. But the culture in which you are raised is a master at instrumentalizing the human being for the success of a few. It is not for the success of the human being. So obviously fear is the means of control. It's the enemy. It's the means of control. We know that you can't allow that to happen to you. You have to be able to live in that culture and not be a victim of those machinations of those systems. So how do you do that? The way is to learn how to bend and then that's where the anger comes because the ego has determined your life all these years. The ego has told you how to make decisions. Your decisions have not come from a truth impulse. They've come from what you call instinct. I feel it's the right thing. I shouldn't lie. Who says you shouldn't lie? Who says that? Which actual spiritual system would say that? Everybody lies. Everybody lies. Everybody lies. But what the system does is it institutes guilt in you so that even if you tell a small lie which is armless to everybody, you feel guilty rather than that you learn that if I tell a lie it's not going to serve this system. Let me go with my truth. So the anger comes up because you don't want to bend to the truth. You don't like the idea that something else is now. And what is this you? It's not you, it's the ego that doesn't like it. The ego is getting angry. You don't take it on yourself. The ego is getting angry. So you need to tell the ego to shut up. So yes, you can say it in German because maybe the ego understands German better. In your case. The attack is against all my values. Of course it's against your value system. Where are your value systems from? Who taught you those things? Not all the value systems. The truth has no value system. The truth doesn't believe in society. It doesn't believe in family. It doesn't believe in country. It doesn't believe in religion. It doesn't believe in basically in anything. The truth is independent of systems. That sounds beautiful. It's a freedom. It's a freedom. But it's not a freedom to just do nonsense. It's a freedom to go with that truth fearlessly. What do you have to lose? Tell me. You have to lose some family and some friends in Germany. I mean, go there, you'll find others. The moment one person leaves, two people who are better than that one come in. If you go with the truth, otherwise when you're leaving to God's garden, you'll be surrounded by people that have made you unhappy. I'm still on the way to find the line or the way really is this the truth? So sometimes I have to ask several times the same question. Before you go to that, talking about your value systems, what are your value systems? To be kind, to be honest. You think the truth is going to tell you not to be kind? To have a standpoint. Do you think the truth of your system is going to tell you to be unkind to somebody? Yes or no? I'm not 100% sure. That's a good position to be in. Why? Because the truth can tell you to be unkind to somebody as much as it can say no. If you ask the question, should I be unkind to him? You might get a yes from the truth. Because the truth is here to serve society, not just the individual, but society is here to serve society and not the individual. You see, that's the problem. Our lives are governed by value systems that are not here in place to serve the individual's development, growth and strength, but to serve society's development, growth and strength. We have to switch that around, that's all. But the truth will always, it is that that is underlying this entire thing that is unfolding along the time trajectory. Everything is connected to perfection and that truth knows it. If you don't go with the truth, you stumble. But if you just go fearlessly, there is no chance of that stumbling happening and it also serves society at the same time. So if you get an impulse, be unkind to him in this moment and you go with it fearlessly, you will be kind to him, yourself and the whole world around. Okay. That's how it works. But because society has told you to be kind to everybody and it hasn't told you what is kind actually. What does it mean to be kind? If you ask children in Germany or Switzerland, what does it mean to be kind to somebody? Then it will be more like, yeah, give them your pencil if they ask you for it. It's an outward movement. It's nothing told that go inward and feel if something is the right thing to do and then do it. Why? Because it's a society that is formed by religious pressure top down. A spiritual seeker will always try to escape that religious pressure because they know something is not okay. And the thing is that you found out that something is not okay but you're not okay with the thing that is okay. That step is coming now. You must be ready to change everything in your life. What do you have to lose? Ute, tell me, what do you have to lose? Give me one example, your friends. I have friends, I have family. You think you'll lose your friends if you go with the truth? Some of them. But then they're not your friends. They're not. If a friend is a true friend, they'll be around whether they agree with you or not. But the thing about friends is friends are only friends when they agree with you. Then for a while they're not talking to you because they don't agree with you. Then suddenly they turn up again because now time has passed. Then again you try the friendship. And if you both agree nicely dancing up the garden paths together, then it's all fine. So friends are actually an idea in the head. So why can't a friend be somebody you just met right now? So many people. You just walk along. There's the guy who sells tea over there. There's a very sweet guy. He can be your friend. Why does it have to be? One has to free oneself of all these ideas of family and friends. One has to be loving and kind to everybody. Why can't that tea seller also be a friend? It should be possible. I like this picture. Yes, you'll never be alone like that. You'll always have people. Everyone will be your friend. And sometimes they'll fight with you. Then they're not your friend. And again they're your friend. Then you go to a bus stand and you talk to some lady there who's waiting for the bus. And she's your friend. You can create every human being to be your friend. This idea of holding on to three and a half people who anyway don't have time for you. So you don't have fear of losing your friends. What about your family? The problem is one can't get rid of family even if one wants to. It hurts very much to get a distance from them. But you are not getting a distance. They are getting a distance from you because you're starting to say things they don't agree with. Are you getting a distance from them? I don't agree politically with them. That's a political disagreement. There's still blood family. I'm telling you can't get rid of family. One just can't. They are always around. They'll find you even if you run away from them. So don't worry about family. You won't get rid of them. So what else are you afraid of losing if you go with the truth of your being? In my life I thought I need a standpoint to go through life. And now not to have one standpoint is like, oh my God, who am I? You are just Ute daughter of, what's your mother's name? Ursula. Ute daughter of Ursula from? Girlitz. Girlitz. That is who you are and nothing more. That's enough. It's all three things already. Why do you have to be anything else? Tell me. Why? It is the connection but the feeling to be strong. And if I don't have a standpoint, I feel weak. But you have a standpoint. Your standpoint is the truth of your being. Yes. That's the standpoint you ask the question. Yeah. Ask the truth the question. If you get an answer, you get an answer. If you don't get an answer, you don't get an answer. It's still better to ask that question than not to ask it at all and to just operate in this life and say, I'm operating from my instincts. That's what a lot of people say to me. I don't have to go to the truth. I'm okay. What is this thing called instinct? Where does it come from? Where is that information coming into your thinking from? No idea. Just it's a feeling. So that means tomorrow if your instinct tells you to go and kill somebody, will you do it? No, my instinct would never tell me that. But there are people whose instinct tells them that. So my point is that to become more aware of not who you are, what does it matter or who am I? What does that matter? It doesn't matter. Neither does it matter anything to you and certainly it doesn't matter to anyone else. Okay. So it's not about who am I? It's about what is this thing doing in this moment, in the next moment, in the moment after that, in the moment after. What is this body doing? What is the action it's undertaking? That's all. And if you don't know what to do, because you don't feel the truth, at least you've asked the question which you were not doing before. Yeah. You have said, bending down means not to, if up, it means to put up the weapon. Against the ego, it's bend down, pick up the weapons against the ego. Against the ego? Yes. I was thinking, what are my weapons? I don't have any weapons. Ute, you want things. The more you want, the less you'll get. You have to just be. I told you not just be. Just be. Please again. Just be. He may have to muster this, so vinegar creaks too. Thank you. To la jitka paeje, jitka kami to la merel. That's in Marathi, by the way. Thank you. Maybe he can say it in French. We can say it in all languages of everyone that's here. Bend down to the truth, go with the truth. Wow. That's all. The more you want, the less you'll get. Just go with the truth. Just bend. Just be. I'm happy to be alive. You have a job. You have a job. You go to the job. Oh, I'm happy that I have a job. That's enough. You don't have to think so much about anything. It's finished. You don't have to think, oh, my family, oh, my friends, oh, my this, my that, my that. It's not going to make you happy. I want to go back to a joyful life. Go back to a joyful life. No, go forward to a joyful life. Because had you been really joyful, you wouldn't have been a seeker sitting in a satsang. That's true. Either you're unhappy or you're unconscious. The unhappy ones come to the satsang. The unconscious ones don't. That's how it is. I don't mean this satsang. I mean, generally a person becomes a spiritual seeker because they realize that they have become a victim of society and they realize that now they have to find to themselves. So they start reading books, searching, and that is a way, steps by which they can go back to the home, to the truth, which is the base of their being. There's nothing to worry so much about, you know? Yeah. You already looked literally in front of my eyes. You've just... You've become like a... I don't know, like 20 years younger. Just right now, it's shocking to see that. I would like to check that up on the camera. No, seriously, because I... Did you notice it? It's just suddenly like it's... There's nothing. It's just living. It's beautiful. It's beautiful. Nothing to worry about. Nothing to be afraid of. If you're afraid of something, that's the ego out. Out. No fear, out. Throw it out. You wanted to throw the fear out of the system. You throw it out by throwing it out. Yes. You throw it out by recognizing the tremor and saying no. Out. Out. Yes. And after a while, once you train yourself to do that, you know, what will happen, it's very fascinating. You will be able to sense the vibration of fear trying to enter your system before it comes in and you'll be able to deflect it. There are people, I've trained to do this, they can do it. They actually can do it. From this moment, if you are afraid, have that fear tremor, it is your fault. Because now you know how to do it. If you allow yourself to be fearful, for example, to raise your hand and ask a question, nobody else in this room will take the blame from now on. We'll all point a finger at you. You. Because you know how to do it. Soforth, rouse, nine. Nine. It's over, those fears. It's just nonsense. Not one minute more in this life. Sometimes fear is there. There are situations. But not this daily thing for small, small things. It's out.