 Welcome everyone to another Narc Survivor live video. I haven't spoken on this topic for a while, but I would like to discuss it again here in this live video. The difference between a narcissist and an emotionally healthy partner. There is a big difference. An emotionally healthy partner can be vulnerable with you. They can reveal their insecurities. They can reflect on their insecurities. They can be open and honest with you. They're not afraid to admit their faults and mistakes. Their flaws and imperfections. They can reflect on these things and they can admit it to themselves and to other people as well. Because I think an emotionally healthy person would rather be hated and abandoned for them being who they are. Rather than them being loved and admired for something that they are not. I think that's one big difference right there. For that reason they can be very understanding of you. They can be more respectful. They can recognise where they went wrong. They can make improvements. They can adjust. That is why relationships with emotionally healthy partners tend to be more successful. I'm not saying that they're perfect. Of course things go wrong. That's just a part of life. So even if you are with someone who is emotionally healthy, you will experience arguments and disagreements. But when you argue with them, when you disagree, you're still on the same page. You may not agree completely. You may have some differences of opinion with some things. But the difference is that they can see where you're coming from. They get it. They may not agree with it. But they can see how you got to that conclusion. Because they have empathy. They can put themselves in your shoes. They can share your experiences. So although there may still be arguments and disagreements, they are things that tend to get resolved. And they get resolved quite quickly. It's not something where the argument lasts for hours or even days. And it's not something where they or you have to resurface this argument somewhere down the line because it was never resolved. With an emotionally healthy partner, it's usually resolved there and then. There's no confusion about it and you feel a sense of conclusion and resolution. You're satisfied with the result because they have the ability to share your experience and see where you're coming from. And they can make adjustments. They can compromise. And you can do the same for them because they give you the room, the space to do that. They accommodate you. And as I said, they're not afraid to be vulnerable. They can be vulnerable with you. They can be very caring, loving and affectionate. And you feel it. You do feel that there is an emotional bond there. But with the narcissist, there is no understanding. Everything is one-sided. There's a lot of double standards. There's a lot of arguments and disagreements. It's either their way or the highway. It's like they just can't accept you. They're always trying to change you. They're always trying to mold you into what they want you to be. You can never be yourself around the narcissist. You can never be yourself around them. And they can't be vulnerable with you. They can't be open and honest because they're afraid to be vulnerable. They're afraid of giving away their control and putting themselves in a position where they could be in danger of being harmed. Because they're very paranoid. They're hyper-vigilant. They're always on edge. So it's all about getting you before you get them. And as I said, there's just no understanding with the narcissist. They really don't care about what you think. They don't care about what makes you more comfortable. They don't care about accommodating you. That is why you experience so much anxiety and stress. Because you're giving all of your love and care to this person to the point where you begin to neglect yourself. And they're not caring for you. They're not considering your needs. So when you're with a narcissist, no one is considering your wishes and needs, not even you. The narcissist is serving themselves often at your expense. Everything's one-sided. And you have nothing to replenish yourself. So you gradually begin to deteriorate. You become less and less like yourself. And when that happens, the narcissist blames you. So there's no way to repair the relationship because it takes two people to work together to build it and maintain it in the first place. And if there aren't two people putting in equal effort, it's bound to fail. But there is nothing you can tell them. If you are with a narcissist, there are lost cause. They're not going to hear it. They're not going to see the errors of their ways. And when the rare case that they do, they will justify it. They will blame you for it. So really, they're not really seeing the error of their ways at all. Because they still manage to justify it. They still think that it's okay. And that is why there's just no improvement. They're just always expecting you to change. And you do change. You become less and less like yourself every day. You become unrecognisable. And they will even tell you this a few months down the line. They will say that you're not like you used to be. You're a lot quieter now. You're not happy. You're a lot more grumpy now. And you may even find yourself pointing out things that are wrong. Wishing for things to be better. You may find yourself becoming negative just like them. Because emotions are very contagious. And then it's like you switch personalities. They become more like you. And you become more like them. And now they're looking at you like you're the problem. Like you're the one that needs to change. But you have no energy or resources to give to yourself to help you to change and to become happier and more positive. And they're not bringing anything to you. There becomes a point in a narcissistic relationship where you realise that no matter what you do, this problem is never going to be fixed. And I hope that many of you will come to the conclusion that it will never be fixed because it's not your problem to fix. It's theirs. But they don't see it as though it's their problem. And that is why nothing ever changes. Because if someone recognises a problem and they put the time and effort in to fix that, it should get resolved. But it never does with narcissists. Because there's no mutual understanding. They're self-absorbed and they lack empathy. They don't care about what you're going through. They don't care about your feelings. There's no love or affection because they're emotionally unavailable. They can't connect to you. They want you to attach to them, but they don't want to attach to you. These are the differences between a relationship with a narcissist and an emotionally healthy partner. With the emotionally healthy partner, you feel loved, you feel cherished, you feel accepted, you feel special and important. With a narcissist, you just feel like you don't matter. You feel insignificant, irrelevant, because to the narcissist, you don't matter. All that matters is what you can do for them. Supply. In emotionally healthy relationships, love, loyalty, acceptance and understanding is what is most important. In narcissistic relationships, it's all about supply. That's what fuels them. We may be fuelled by peace, love and joy, but narcissists are fuelled by supply. That is why you can never have a healthy relationship with a narcissist. Quite a deep topic here today, but I hope it's given you something to think about. Anyway, I'd just like to thank you all for joining me on another Narc Survivor Live video. I do appreciate you all. Thank you all for your support and I will talk to you in another live video very soon.