 Chapter 23 of Middle March This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. Middle March by George Eliot. Book 3 Waiting for Death Chapter 23 Your horses of the sun, he said, and first rate with a polo. What are they be? I'll eat my head, but I will beat them hollow. Fred Vinci, we have seen, had a debt on his mind, and though no such immaterial burden could depress that buoyant hearted young gentleman for many hours together, there were circumstances connected with his debt, which made the thought of it unusually unfortunate. The creditor was Mr Bambridge, a horse dealer of the neighbourhood, whose company was much sought in Middle March by young men understood to be addicted to pleasure. During the vacations, Fred had naturally required more amusements than he had ready money for. And Mr Bambridge had been accommodating enough not only to trust him for the hire of horses and the accidental expense of ruining a fine hunter, but also to make a small advance by which he might be able to meet some losses at Billiards. The total debt was £160. Bambridge was in no alarm about his money, being sure that young Vinci had backers, that he had required something to show for it, and Fred had at first given a bill with his own signature. Three months later, he had renewed this bill with the signature of Caleb Garth. On both occasions, Fred had felt confident that he should meet the bill himself, having ample funds at disposal in his own hopefulness. You will hardly demand that his confidence should have a basis in external facts. Such confidence, we know, is something less coarse and materialistic. It is a comfortable disposition leading us to expect that the wisdom of providence or the folly of our friends, the mysteries of luck, or the still greater mystery of our high individual value in the universe will bring about agreeable issues, such as are consistent with our good taste in costume, and our general preference for the best style of thing. Fred felt sure that he should have a present from his uncle, that he should have a run of luck, that by dint of swapping he should gradually metamorphose a horse worth £40 into a horse that would fetch £100 at any moment. Judgment, being always equivalent to an unspecified sum in hard cash, and in any case, even supposing negations which only a morbid distrust could imagine. Fred had always, at that time, his father's pocket as a last resource, so that his assets of hopefulness had a sort of gorgeous superfluity about them. Of what might be the capacity of his father's pocket, Fred had only a vague notion, was not trade elastic, and would not, the deficiencies of one year, be made up for by the surplus of another. The Vinces lived in an easy-prefuse way, not with any new ostentation, but according to the family habits and traditions, so that the children had no standard of economy, and the elder ones retained some of their infantine notion that their father might pay for anything if he would. Mr Vincy himself had expensive middle-march habits, spent money on coarsing, on his solar, and on dinner giving, while Mama had those running accounts with trade's people, which give a cheerful sense of getting everything one wants without any question of payment. But it was in the nature of father's, Fred knew, to bully one about expenses. There was always a little storm over his extravagance if he had to disclose a debt, and Fred disliked bad weather within doors. He was too filial to be disrespectful to his father, and he bore the thunder with the certainty that it was transient, but in the meantime it was disagreeable to see his mother cry, and also to be obliged to look sulky instead of having fun. For Fred was so good-tempered that if he looked glum, underscoulding, it was chiefly for propriety's sake. The easier course plainly was to renew the bill with the friend's signature. Why not? With the superfluous securities of hope at his command, there was no reason why he should not have increased other people's liabilities to any extent. But for the fact that men whose names were good for anything were usually pessimists, in disposed to believe that the universal order of things would necessarily be agreeable to an agreeable young gentleman. With a favour to ask, we review our list of friends, do justice to their more amiable qualities, forgive their little offences, and concerning each in turn try to arrive at the conclusion that he will be eager to oblige us. Our own eagerness to be obliged, being as communicable as other warmth. Still there is always a certain number who are dismissed, as but moderately eager until the others have refused. And it happened that Fred checked off all his friends but one. On the ground that applying to them would be disagreeable, being implicitly convinced that he at least, whatever might be maintained about mankind generally, had a right to be free from anything disagreeable. That he should ever fall into a thoroughly unpleasant position where trousers shrunk with washing, a cold mutton hath to walk for want of a horse, or to duck under in any sort of way, was an observity irreconcilable with those cheerful intuitions implanted in him by nature. And Fred winced under the idea of being looked down upon as wanting funds for small debts. Thus it came to pass that the friend whom he chose to apply to was at once the poorest and the kindest. Namely, Caleb Garth. The Garthes were very fond of Fred, as he was of them. For when he and Rosamond were little ones, and the Garthes were better off, the slight connection between the two families through Mr. Featherstone's double marriage, the first to Mr. Garth's sister, and the second to Mrs. Vinces, had led to an acquaintance which was carried on between the children, rather than the parents. The children drunk tea together out of their toy tea cups and spent whole days together in play. Mary was a little hoiden, and Fred, at six years old, thought her the nicest girl in the world, making her his wife with a brass ring, which he had cut from an umbrella. Through all the stages of his education, he had kept his affection for the Garthes, and his habit of going to their house as a second home, though any intercourse between them and the elders of his family had long ceased. Even when Caleb Garth was prosperous, the Vinces were on condescending terms with him and his wife, for there was nice distinctions of rank in middle March. And though old manufacturers could not any more than dukes be connected with none but equals, they were conscious of an inherent social superiority, which was defined with great nicety in practice, though hardly expressible theoretically. Since then, Mr. Garth had failed in the building business, which he had unfortunately added to his other vocations of surveyor, valuer and agent, had conducted that business for a time entirely for the benefit of his assignees, and had been living narrowly, exerting himself to the utmost that he might after all pay twenty shillings in the pound. He had now achieved this, and from all who did not think it a bad precedent, his honourable exertions had won him due esteem, but in no part of the world is Gentile visiting founded on esteem, in the absence of suitable furniture and complete dinner service. Mrs. Vincy had never been at ease with Mrs. Garth, and frequently spoke of her as a woman who had had to work for her bread, meaning that Mrs. Garth had been a teacher before her marriage, in which case an intimacy with linearly Murray and Magnol's questions was something like a draper's discrimination of calico trademarks, or a courier's acquaintance with foreign countries. No woman, who was better off, needed that sort of thing. And since Mary had been keeping Mr. Featherstone's house, Mrs. Vincy's want of liking for the Garth's had been converted into something more positive. By alarm less, Fred should engage himself to this plain girl, whose parents lived in such a small way. Fred, being aware of this, never spoke at home of his visits to Mrs. Garth, which had at late become more frequent. The encroaching idol of his affection for Mary, inclining him the more towards those who belonged to her. Mr. Garth had a small office in the town, and to this Fred went with his request. He obtained it without much difficulty, for a large amount of painful experience had not sufficed to make Caleb Garth cautious about his own affairs. All distrustful of his fellow men, when they had not proved themselves untrustworthy. And he had the highest opinion of Fred, was sure the lad would turn out well, an open affectionate fellow with a good bottom to his character. You might trust him for anything, such was Caleb's psychological argument. He was one of those rare men who are rigid to themselves and indulgent to others. He had a certain shame about his neighbours' errors, and never spoke of them willingly. Hence he was not likely to divert his mind from the best mode of hardening timber and other ingenuous devices in order to preconceive those errors. If he had to blame anyone, it was necessary for him to move all the papers within his reach, or describe various diagrams with his stick, or make calculations with the odd money in his pocket, before he could begin. And he would rather do other men's work than find fault with their doing. I fear he was a bad disciplinarian. When Fred stated the circumstances of his debt, he wished to meet it without troubling his father and the certainty that the money would be forthcoming, so as to cause no one any inconvenience. Caleb pushed his spectacles upward, listened, looked into his favourites' clear young eyes, and believed him, not distinguishing confidence about the future from veracity about the past. But he felt that it was an occasion for a friendly hint as to conduct, and that before giving his signature, he must give a rather strong admonition. Accordingly, he took the paper and lowered his spectacles, measured the space at his command, reached his pen and examined it, dipped it in the ink and examined it again, then pushed the paper a little away from him, lifted up his spectacles again, showed a deepened depression in the outer angle of his bushy eyebrows, which gave his face a peculiar mouldness. Pardon these details for once. You would have learned to love them if you had known Caleb Garth and said in a comfortable tone, it was a misfortune, eh, that breaking the horse's knees. And then, these exchanges, they don't answer when you have two jockeys to deal with. You'll be wiser another time, my boy. Whereupon Caleb drew down his spectacles and proceeded to write his signature with the care which he always gave to that performance. For whatever he did in the way of business, he did well. He contemplated the large well-proportioned letters and final flourish, with his head a trifle on one side for an instant, handed it to Fred, said goodbye, and returned forthwith to his absorption in a plan for St James Chetam's new farm buildings. Either because his interest in his work thrust the incident of the signature from his memory, or for some reason of which Caleb was more conscious, Mrs Garth remained ignorant of the affair. Since it occurred, a change had come over Fred's sky, which altered his view of the distance. And was the reason why his uncle Featherstone's present of money was of importance enough to make his colour come and go, first with the two definite expectation, and afterwards with the proportionate disappointment. His failure in passing his examination had made his accumulation of college debts the more unpardonable by his father, and there had been an unprecedented storm at home. Mr Vincey had sworn that if he had anything more that sought to put up with, Fred should turn out and get his living how he could, and he had never yet quite recovered his good human tone to his son, who had especially enraged him by saying at this stage of things that he did not want to be a clergyman, and would rather not go on with that. Fred was conscious that he would have been yet more severely dealt with, if his family as well as himself had not secretly regarded him as Mr Featherstone's heir. That old gentleman's pride in him, and apparent fondness for him, serving in the steed a more exemplary conduct, just as when a youthful nobleman steals jewellery we call the act kleptomania. Speak of it with a philosophical smile, and never think that he's being sent to the House of Correction, as if he were a ragged boy who would stow on turnips. In fact, tacit expectations of what would be done for him by Uncle Featherstone determined the angle at which most people viewed Fred Vincy in Middle March and in his own consciousness. What Uncle Featherstone would do for him in an emergency, or what he would do simply as an incorporated luck, formed always an immeasurable depth of aerial perspective. But that present of banknotes, once made, was measurable, and being applied to the amount of the debt, showed a deficit which had still be filled up, either by Fred's judgment or by luck in some other shape. For that little episode of the alleged borrowing in which he had made his father the agent in getting the Belstrode certificate, was a new reason against going to his father for money towards meeting his actual debt. Fred was keen enough to foresee that anger would confuse distinctions, and that his denial of having borrowed expressly on the strength of his uncle's will would be taken as a falsehood. He had gone to his father and told him one vexatious affair, and he had left another untold. In such cases the complete revelation always produces the impressions of a previous duplicity. Now Fred peaked himself unkeeping clear of lies and even fibs. He often shrugged his shoulders and made a significant grimace at what he called Rosamund's fibs. It is only brothers who can associate such ideas with his girl. And rather than incur the accusation of falsehood, he would even incur some trouble and self-restraint. It was under strong inward pressure of this kind that Fred had taken the wise debt of depositing the 80 pounds with his mother. It was a pity that he had not at once given them to Mr. Garth, but he meant to make the sum complete with another 60. And with a view to this, he had kept 20 pounds in his own pocket as a sort of seed corn, which planted by judgment and watered by luck might yield more than threefold. A very poor rate of multiplication when the field is a young gentleman's infinite soul and all the numerals at command. Fred was not a gambler. He had not that specific disease in which the suspension of the whole nervous energy on a chance or risk becomes as necessary as the dram to the drunkard. He had only the tendency to that diffusive form of gambling, which has no alcoholic intensity. It is carried on with the healthiest child, Fred Blood, keeping up a joyous imaginative activity, which fashions events according to desire and having no fears about its own weather only sees the advantage there must be to others in going aboard with it. Hopefulness has a pleasure in making a throw of any kind because the prospect of success is certain and only a more generous pleasure in offering as many as possible a share in the stake. Fred liked play, especially billiards, as he liked hunting or riding a steeple chase and he only liked it the better because he wanted money and hoped to win. But the twenty pounds worth of seed corn had been planted in vain in the seductive green plot, all of it at least, which had not been dispersed by the roadside and Fred found himself close upon the term of payment. With no money at command beyond the eighty pounds, which he had deposited with his mother. The broken-winded horse which he rode represented a present which had been made to him a long while ago by his Uncle Featherston. His father always allowed him to keep a horse. Mr Vince's own habits making him regard this as a reasonable demand, even for a son who was rather exasperating. This horse then was Fred's property and in his anxiety to meet the imminent bill he determined to sacrifice a possession without which life would certainly be worth little. He made the resolution with a sense of heroism. Heroism forced on him by the dread of breaking his word to Mr Garth by his love for Mary and awe of her opinion. He would start for Hounsley Horse Fair which was to be held the next morning and simply sell his horse bringing back the money by coach. Well the horse would hardly fetch more than thirty pounds and there was no knowing what might happen. It would be folly to fork himself a block beforehand. It was a hundred to one that some good chance would fall in his way. The longer he thought of it the less possible it seemed that he should not have a good chance and the less reasonable that he should not equip himself with the powder and shot for bringing it down. He would ride to Hounsley with Fanebridge and with Horrook the vet and without asking them anything expressly he should virtually get the benefit of their opinion. Before he set out Fred got the eighty pounds from his mother. Most of those who saw Fred riding out of middle marching company with Fanebridge and Horrook on his way of course to Hounsley Horse Fair thought that young Vincy was pleasure seeking as usual and but for an unwanted consciousness of grave matters on hand he himself would have had a sense of dissipation and of doing what might be expected of a gay young fellow. Considering that Fred was not at all course that he rather looked down on the manners and speech of young men who had not been to university and that he had written stances as pastoral and invulctuous as his flute playing. His attraction towards Fanebridge and Horrook was an interesting fact which even a love of coarse flesh would not wholly account for without that mysterious influence of naming which determinates so much of mortal choice. Under any other name than pleasure the Society of Messiers, Fanebridge and Horrook must certainly have been regarded as monotonous and to arrive with them at Hounsley on a drizzling afternoon to get down at the red line in a street shaded with cold dust and dine in a room furnished with a dirt enameled map of the country. A bad portrait of an anonymous horse in a stable his majesty George IV with legs and cravat and various leaden spittoons might have seemed a hard business but for the sustaining power of nom and cletul was determined that the pursuit of these things was gay. In Mr. Horrook there was certainly an apparent unfathomableness which offered play to the imagination. Costume at a glance gave him a thrilling association with horses enough to specify the hat brim which took the slightest upward angle just to escape the suspicion of bending downwards and nature had given him a face which by dint of Mongolian eyes and a nose, mouth and chin seeming to follow his hat brim in a moderate inclination upwards gave the effect of a subdued unchangeable skeptical smile of all expressions the most tyrannous over a susceptible mind and when accompanied by adequate silence likely to create the reputation of an invincible understanding an infinite fund of humour too dry to flow and probably in a state of immovable crust and a critical judgement which if you could ever be fortunate enough to know it would be the thing and no other. It is a physiovenomy seen in all vocations but perhaps it has never been more powerful over the youth of England than in a judge of horses. Mr. Horrook had a question from Fred about his horse's fetlock turned sideways in his saddle and watched the horse's action for the space of three minutes then turned forward twitched his own bridle and remained silent with a profile neither more nor less practical than it had been. The part thus played in dialogue by Mr. Horrook was terribly effective a mixture of passions was excited in Fred a mad desire to threshold Horrook's opinion into utterance restrained by anxiety to retain the advantage of his friendship there was always the chance that Horrook might say something quite invaluable at the right moment Mr. Vanebridge had more open manners and appeared to give forth his ideas without economy he was loud, robust and was sometimes spoken of as being given to indulgence chiefly in swearing, drinking and beating his wife some people who had lost by him called him a vicious man but regarded horse-dealing as the finest of the arts and might have argued plausibly that it had nothing to do with morality he was undeniably a prosperous man for he's drinking better than others for their moderation and on the whole flourished like the Green Bay tree but his range of conversation was limited and like the fine old tune Drops of Brandy gave you after a while a sense of returning upon itself in a way that might make weak heads dizzy but a slight infusion of Mr. Vanebridge was felt to give tone and character to several circles in middle March and he was a distinguished figure in the bar and billiard room at the Green Dragon he knew some anecdotes about the heroes of the turf and various clever tricks of Marquesas and Viscounts which seemed to prove that blood asserted its preeminence even among black legs but the minute retentiveness of his memory was chiefly shown about the horses he had himself fought and sold the number of miles they would trot you in no time without turning a head being after the lapse of years still a subject, a passionate, a separation in which he would assist the imagination of his heroes by solemnly swearing that they never saw anything like it in short, Mr. Vanebridge was a man of pleasure and a gay companion Fred was subtle and did not tell his friends that he was going to Hounsley bent on selling his horse he wished to get indirectly at their genuine opinion of its value not being aware that a genuine opinion was the last thing likely to be extracted from such eminent critics it was not Mr. Vanebridge's weakness to be a gratuitous flutterer he had never before seen so much struck with the fact that this unfortunate bay was Aurora to a degree which required round the swerve for perdition to give you any idea of it you made a bad hand at swapping when you went to anybody but me, Vincy why, you never threw your leg across a finer horse than that chestnut, and you gave him for this brute if you set him cantering, he goes on like twenty sawyers I never heard but one worse Aurora in my life and that was a roam it belonged to Pegwell, the corn factor he used to drive him in his gig, seven years ago and he wanted me to take him but I said, thank you Peg, I don't deal in wind instruments that was what I said it went the round of the country that Joe did but what the hell the horse was a penny trumpet to the Aurora of yours why, you said just now he was worse than mine said Fred, more irritable than usual I said a lie then, said Mr. Vainbridge emphatically there wasn't a penny to choose between them Fred spurred his horse and they trotted on a little way when they slackened again, Mr. Vainbridge said not by what the round was a better trotter than yours I'm quite satisfied with his cases I know, said Fred who required all the consciousness of being in gay company to support him I say his trot is an uncommonly clean mind, eh, Horick Mr. Horick looked before him as complete a neutrality as if he had been a portrait by a great master Fred gave up the fallacious hope of getting a genuine opinion but on reflection he saw that Vainbridge's depreciation and Horick's silence were both virtually encouraging and indicated that they thought better of the horse than they chose to say that very evening indeed before the fair had set him Fred thought he saw a favourable opening for disposing advantageously of his horse but an opening which made him congratulate himself on his foresight in bringing with him his 80 pounds A young farmer, acquainted with Mr. Vainbridge came into the red lion and entered into conversation about parting with a hunter which he introduced at once as diamond implying that it was a public character for himself he only wanted a useful hack which would draw upon occasion being about to marry and to give up hunting The hunter was in a friend's stable at some little distance there was still time for gentlemen to see it before dark The friend's stable had to be reached through a back street where he might as easily had been poisoned without expense of drugs as in any Grimm Street at that unsanitary period Fred was not fortified against discussed by Brandy as his companions were but the hope of having at last seen the horse that would enable him to make money was exhilarating enough to lead him over the same ground again the first thing in the morning He felt sure that if he did not come to a bargain with the farmer, Vainbridge would For the stress of circumstances Fred felt was sharpening his acuteness and endowing him with all the constructive power of suspicion Vainbridge had run down diamond in a way that he never would have done The horse being a friend's If he had not thought of buying it everyone who looked at the animal, even Horrope was evidently impressed with its merit To get all the advantage of being with men of this sort you must know how to draw your inferences and not be a spoon who takes things literally The colour of the horse was a dappled grey and Fred happened to know that Lord Midler Coatsman was on the lookout for such a horse After all he's run and down Vainbridge let it out in the course of the evening when the farmer was absent that he had seen worse horses go for 80 pounds Of course he contradicted himself 20 times over but when you know what is likely to be true you can test a man's admissions and Fred could not but reckon his own judgement of a horse as worth something The farmer had paused over Fred's respectable though broken-winded steed long enough to show that he thought it worth consideration and it seemed probable that he would take it with 5 and 20 pounds in addition as the equivalent of Diamond In that case Fred when he had parted with his new horse for at least 80 pounds would be 55 pounds in pocket by the transaction and would have 135 pounds towards meeting the bill so that the deficit temporarily thrown on Mr. Garth would at the utmost be 25 pounds By the time he was hurrying on his clothes in the morning he saw so clearly the importance of not losing this rare chance that if Vainbridge and Horrook had both dissuaded him he would not have been deluded into a direct interpretation of their purpose He would have been aware that those deep hands were something else than a young fellow's interest With regard to horses, distrust was your only clue but skepticism, as we know, could never be thoroughly applied Elf's life would come to a standstill something we must believe in and do and whatever that something may be called it is virtually our own judgement even when it seems like the most slavish reliance on another Fred believed in the excellence of his bargain and even before the fair had well set in had got possession of the dapple grey at the price of his old horse and 30 pounds in addition only 5 pounds more than he had expected to give but he felt a little worried and worried perhaps with mental debate and without waiting for the further gayities of the horse fair he set out alone on his 14 miles journey meaning to take it very quietly and keep his horse fresh End of Chapter 23 This is a LibriVox recording All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain For more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org Middle March by George Elliott as read for LibriVox by Madame Tusk www.rlowalrus.sitesled.com Chapter 24 The offender's sorrow brings but small relief to him who wears the strong offence's cross Shakespeare, Sonnets I am sorry to say that only the third day after the propitious events at Hounsley Fred Vincy had fallen into worse spirits than he had known in his life before not that he had been disappointed as to the possible market for his horse but that before the bargain could be concluded with Lord Medlikot's man this diamond in which hope to the amount of 80 pounds had been invested had without the slightest warning exhibited in the stable a most vicious energy in kicking had just missed killing the groom and had ended in blaming himself severely by catching his leg on a rope that overhung the stable board there was no more redress for this than for the discovery of bad temper after marriage which of course old companions were aware of before the ceremony for some reason or other Fred had none of his usual elasticity under this stroke of ill fortune he was simply aware that he had only 50 pounds that there was no chance of his getting any more at present and that the bill for 160 would be presented in five days even if he had applied to his father on the plea that Mr. Garth should be saved from loss Fred felt smartingly that his father would angrily refuse to rescue Mr. Garth from the consequence of what he would call encouraging extravagance and deceit he was so utterly downcast that he could frame no other project than to go straight to Mr. Garth and tell him the sad truth carrying with him the 50 pounds and getting that sum at least safely out of his hands his father being at the warehouse did not yet know of the accident when he did he would storm about the vicious brute being brought into a stable and before meeting that lesser annoyance Fred wanted to get away with all his courage to face the greater he took his father's nag for he had made up his mind that when he had told Mr. Garth he would write his own court and confess all to Mary in fact it is probable that but for Mary's existence and Fred's love for her his conscience would have been much less active both in previously urging the debt on his thought and impelling him not to spare himself after his usual fashion by deferring an unpleasant task but to act as directly and simply as he could even much stronger mortals than Fred, Vincy, hold half the rectitude in the mind of the being they love best the theatre of all my actions is fallen said an antique personage when his chief friend was dead and they are fortunate to get a theatre where the audience demands their best certainly it would have made a considerable difference to Fred at that time if Mary had had no decided notions as to what was admirable in character Mr. Garth was not at the office and Fred rode on to his house which was a little way outside the town a homely place with an orchard in front of it a rambling old-fashioned half-timbered building which before the town had spread had been a farmhouse but was now surrounded with the private gardens of the townsmen we get the fonder of our houses if they have a physiognomy of their own as our friends have the Garth family which was rather a large one for Mary had four brothers and one sister was very fond of their old house from which all the best furniture had long been sold Fred liked it too knowing it by heart even to the attic which smelled deliciously of apples and quinces and until today he had never come to without pleasant expectations but his heart be done easily now with the sense that he should probably have to make his confession before Mrs. Garth of whom he was rather more in awe than of her husband not that she was inclined to sarcasm and to impulsive sallies as Mary was in her present maternity age at least Mrs. Garth never committed herself by overhasty speech having, as she said, borne the yoke in her youth and learned self-control she had that rare sense which discerns what is unalterable and submits to it without murmuring adoring her husband's virtues she had early made up her mind to his incapacity of minding his own interests and had met the consequences cheerfully she had been magnanimous enough to renounce all pride in teapots or children's frilling and had never poured any pathetic confidences into the ears of her feminine neighbors concerning Mr. Garth's want of prudence and the sums he might have had if he had been like other men hence these fair neighbors thought her either proud or eccentric and sometimes spoke of her to their husbands as you're fine Mrs. Garth she was not without her criticism of them in return being more accurately instructed than most matrons in Middlemarch and where is the blameless woman apt to be a little severe towards her own sex which in her opinion was framed to be entirely subordinate on the other hand she was disproportionately indulgent toward the failings of men and was often heard to say that these were natural also it must be admitted that Mrs. Garth was a trifle too emphatic in her resistance to what she held to be follies the passage from governess into housewife had wrought itself a little too strongly into her consciousness and she rarely forgot that while her grammar and accent were above the town standard she wore a plain cap, cooked the family dinner and darned all the stockings she had sometimes taken pupils in a parapetetic fashion making them follow her about in the kitchen with their book or slate she thought it good for them to see that she could make an excellent lather while she corrected their blunders without looking that a woman with her sleeves tucked up above her elbows might know all about the subjective mood or the torrid zone that in short she might possess education and other good things ending in shun and worthy to be pronounced emphatically without being a useless doll when she made remarks to this edifying effect she had a firm little frown on her brow which yet did not hinder her face from looking benevolent and her words which came forth like a procession were uttered in a firmid agreeable contralto certainly the exemplary Mrs. Garth had her doll aspects but her character sustained her oddities as a very fine wine sustains a flavour of skin Towards Fred Vincy she had a motherly feeling and had always been disposed to excuse his errors though she would probably not have excused Mary for engaging herself to him her daughter being included in that more rigorous judgement which she applied to her own sex but this very fact of her exceptional indulgence toward him made it the harder to Fred that he must now inevitably sink in her opinion and the circumstances of his visit turned out to be still more unpleasant than he had expected for Caleb Garth had gone out early to look at some repairs not far off Mrs. Garth at certain hours was always in the kitchen and this morning she was carrying on several occupations at once there making her pies at the well-scoured deal-table on one side of that airy room observing Sally's movements at the oven and dough-tub through an open door and giving lessons to her youngest boy and girl who were standing opposite to her at the table with their books and slates before them a tub and a clothes horse at the other end of the kitchen indicated an intermittent wash of small things also going on Mrs. Garth with her sleeves turned up above her elbows deftly handling her pastry applying her rolling pin and giving ornamental pinches while she expanded with grammatical fervour what were the right views about the concord of verbs and pronouns with nouns of multitude or signifying many was a sight agreeably amusing she was of the same curly-haired square-faced type as Mary, but handsomer with more delicacy of feature a pale skin, a solid matronly figure and remarkable firmness of glance in her snowy-friiled cap she reminded one of that delightful French woman whom we have all seen marketing basket on arm looking at the mother you might hope that the daughter would become like her which is a prospective advantage equal to a dowry the mother too often standing behind the daughter like a malignant prophecy such as I am she will shortly be now let us go through that once more said Mrs. Garth pinching an apple-puff which seemed to distract Ben an energetic young male with a heavy brow from due attention to the lesson not about regard to the import of the word as conveying unity or plurality of idea tell me again what that means, Ben Mrs. Garth, like more celebrated educators had her favourite ancient paths and in a general wreck of society would have tried to hold her Lindley Murray above the waves oh, it means you must think what you mean said Ben rather purishly I hate grammar, what's the use of it to teach you to speak and write correctly so that you can be understood said Mrs. Garth with severe precision would you like to speak as old Job does yes, said Ben Stanley, it's funnier he says you go that's as good as you go but he says a ship's in the garden instead of a sheep said Letty with an air of superiority you might think he meant a ship of the sea no, you mightn't if you weren't silly said Ben, how could a ship of the sea come here these things belong only to pronunciation which is the least part of grammar said Mrs. Garth that apple-peel is to be eaten by the pigs, Ben if you eat it I must give them your piece of pasty Job has only to speak about very plain things how do you think you would write or speak about anything more difficult if you knew no more of grammar than he does you would use wrong words and put words in the wrong places and instead of making people understand you they would turn away from you as a tiresome person what would you do then I shouldn't care, I should leave off said Ben with a sense that this was an agreeable issue where grammar was concerned I see you are getting tired and stupid, Ben said Mrs. Garth accustomed to these obstructive arguments from her mail offspring having finished her pies she moved toward the clothes horse and said come here and tell me the story I told on Wednesday about St. Sinatos I know he was a farmer said Ben, now Ben he was a Roman let me tell said Letty using her elbow contentiously this silly thing he was a Roman farmer and he was plowing yes, but before that, that didn't come first people wanted him said Letty well, but you must say what sort of a man he was first insisted Ben, he was a wise man like my father and that made the people want his advice and he was a brave man and could fight with my father couldn't you mother? now Ben, let me tell the story straight on as mother told it us said Letty frowning please mother tell Ben not to speak Letty, I am ashamed of you said her mother ringing out the cat from the tub when your brothers began you ought to have waited to see if he could not tell the story how rude you look pushing and frowning as if you wanted to conquer with your elbows St. Sinatos I am sure would have been very sorry to see his daughter behave so Mrs. Garth delivered this awful sentence with such majesty of enunciation and Letty felt that between repressed volubility and general disesteem that of the Romans inclusive life was really a painful affair now Ben well, oh, well, why there was a great deal of fighting and they were all blockheads and I can't tell it just how you told it but they wanted a man to be captain in king and everything dictator now said Letty with injured looks and not without a wish to make her mother repent very well dictator said Ben contemptuously but that isn't a good word he didn't tell them to write on slates come come Ben you are not so ignorant as that so Mrs. Garth carefully serious Hark! there is a knock at the door run let him open it the knock was Fred's and when Letty said that her father was not in yet but that her mother was in the kitchen Fred had no alternative he could not depart from his usual practice of going to see Mrs. Garth in the kitchen if she happened to be at work there he put his arm around Letty's neck silently let her into the kitchen without his usual jokes and caresses Mrs. Garth was surprised to see Fred at this hour but surprise was not a feeling that she was given to express and she only said quietly continuing her work you Fred so early in the day you look quite pale as anything happened won't speak to Mr. Garth said Fred not ready to say more and to you also he added after a little pause for you no doubt that Mrs. Garth knew everything about the bill and he must in the end speak of it before if not to her solely Caleb will be in again in a few minutes said Mrs. Garth who imagined some trouble between Fred and his father he is sure not to be long because he has some work at his desk that must be done this morning do you mind staying with me while I finish my matters here but we needn't go on about Cincinnati's needy said Ben who had taken Fred's whip out of his hand and was trying its efficiency on the cat now go out now and put that whip down harvoring mean of you to whip poor old tortoise pray take the whip from him Fred come on boy give it to me said Fred putting out his hand will you let me ride on your horse today said Ben rendering up the whip with an air of not being obliged to do it not a day another time I'm not riding my own horse shall you see Mary today yes I think so said Fred with an unpleasant twinge tell her to come home soon and play at four foot so make fun enough enough Ben run away said Mrs. Garth seeing that Fred was teased I'll let in Ben your only pupils now Mrs. Garth said Fred when the children were gone and it was needful to say something that should pass the time he was not yet sure whether he should wait for Mr. Garth or use any good opportunity in conversation to confess to Mrs. Garth herself give her the money and ride away one only one funny hack-butt comes at half past eleven I am not getting a great income now said Mrs. Garth smiling I'm at a low ebb with pupils but I've saved my little purse for Alfred's premium I have ninety-two pounds Mr. Hammers now he's just at the right age this did not lead well towards the news that Mr. Garth was on the brink of losing ninety-two pounds and more Fred was silent young gentlemen who go to college are rather more costly than that Mrs. Garth innocently continued pulling out the edging on a cat-boarder and Caleb thinks that Alfred will turn out a distinguished engineer he wants to give the boy a good chance there he is I am coming in we will go to him in the parlour shall we when they entered the parlour Caleb had thrown down his hat and was seated at his desk oh Alfred my boy he said in a tone of mild surprise holding his pen still undipped you are here be times but missing the usual expression of cheerful greeting in Fred's face he immediately added is there anything up at all anything the matter yes Mr. Garth I'm come to tell you something that I'm afraid will give you about a pinning of me I'm come to tell you and Mrs. Garth that I can't keep my word to meet the bill after all I have been unfortunate I've only got these fifty pounds towards the hundred and sixty while Fred was speaking he had taken out the notes and laid them on the desk before Mr. Garth he had burst forth at once with the plain fact feeling boyishly miserable and without verbal resources Mrs. Garth was mutely astonished and looked at her husband for an explanation Caleb blushed and after a little pause said oh I didn't tell you Susan I put my name to a bill for Fred it was for a hundred and sixty pounds he made sure he could meet it himself there was an evident change in Mrs. Garth's face but it was like the change below a surface of water which remained smooth she fixed her eyes on Fred saying I suppose you've asked your father for the rest of the money and he has refused you no said Fred biting his lip and speaking with more difficulty but I know it would be of no use to ask him and unless it were of use I should not like to mention Mr. Garth's name in the matter it has come at an unfortunate time said Caleb in his hesitating way looking down at the notes and nervously fingering the paper Christmas is upon us I'm rather hard up just now you see I have to cut out everything like a tailor with a short measure what can we do Susan I shall want every father we have on the bank it's a hundred and ten pounds that do take it I must give you the ninety-two pounds I've put by for Alfred's premium said Mrs. Garth gravely and decisively though a nice ear might have discerned a slight tremor in some of the words and I have no doubt that Mary has twenty pounds saved from her salary by this time she will advance it Mrs. Garth had not again looked at Fred and was not in the least calculating what words she should use to cut him the most effectively like the eccentric woman she was she was at present absorbed in considering what was to be done and did not fancy that the end could be better achieved by bitter remarks or explosions but she had made Fred feel for the first time something like the tooth of remorse curiously enough his pain in the affair beforehand had consisted almost entirely in the sense that he must seem dishonorable and sink in the opinion of the Garth's he had not occupied himself with the inconvenience and possible injury that his breach might occasion them for this exercise of the imagination on other people's needs is not common with hopeful young gentlemen indeed we are most of us brought up in the notion that the highest motive for not doing a wrong is something irrespective of the beings who would suffer the wrong but at this moment he suddenly saw himself as a pitiful rascal who was robbing two women of their savings I shall certainly pay it all Mrs. Garth ultimately he stammered out yes ultimately said Mrs. Garth who having a special dislike to find words on ugly occasions could not repress an epigram but boys cannot be apprenticed ultimately they should be apprenticed at 15 she had never been so little inclined to make excuses for Fred I was the most in the wrong Susan said K. I'd read my sure of finding the money but I had no business to be fingering bills I suppose you looked all round and tried all on his means he added fixing his merciful grey eyes on Fred Kaleb was too delicate to specify Mr. Featherston yes I've tried everything I really have I should have had 130 pounds ready but for Miss Fortune with a horse which I was about to sell my uncle had given me 80 pounds 30 with my old horse in order to get another which I was going to sell for 80 or more I meant to go without a horse but now it has turned out vicious and lamed itself I wish I and the horses too had been at the devil before I brought this on you there's no one I care so much for you and Mrs. Garth have always been so kind to me but it's no use saying that you'll always think me a rascal now Fred turned round and hurried out of the room conscious that he was getting rather womanish and feeling confusedly that he is being sorry and used to the Garth's they could see him mount and quickly pass through the gate I'm disappointed in Fred Vincy said Mrs. Garth I would not have believed beforehand that he could have drawn you into his debts I knew he was extravagant but I did not think that you'd be so mean as to hang his risks on his oldest friend I could at least afford to lose I was a fool Susan, such you were said the wife nodding and smiling but I should not have gone to publish it in the marketplace why should you keep such things from me it is just so with your buttons you let them burst off without telling me and go out with your wrist band hanging I had only known I might have been ready with some better plan you were sadly caught up by no Susan said Caleb looking feelingly at her I can't abide your losing the money you've scraped together for Alfred sorry well that I had scraped it together it is you will have to suffer for you must teach the boy yourself you must give up your bad habits some men take to drinking and you have taken to working without pay you will just have a little less in that you must ride over to Mary and that's the tile of what money she has Caleb had pushed his chair back and was leaning forward shaking his head slowly and fitting his fingertips together with much nicety oh Mary he said Susan he went on in a lowered tone I'm afraid she might be fond of Fred oh no she always laughs at him and he's not likely to think of her in any other than a brotherly way Caleb may never joined her and suddenly lowered his spectacles drove his chair to the desk and said do state the bill I wish it was at Hanover these things were a sad interruption to business the first part of this speech comprised his whole store of malendictory expression and was uttered with a slight snarl easy to imagine but it would be difficult to convey to those who never heard him utter the word business the particular tone of fervid veneration a religious regard in which he wrapped it as a consecrated symbol is wrapped in its gold-fringed linen Caleb Garth often took his head in meditation on the value the indispensable might of that myriad-headed myriad-handed labour by which the social body is fed clothed and housed it had laid hold of his imagination in boyhood the echoes of the great hammer where a roof or keel were making the signal shots of the workman the roar of the furnace the thunder and plash of the engine or a sublime music to him the felling in landing of timber like in the distance along the highway the crane at work on the wharf the piled up produce in warehouses the precision and variety of muscular effort wherever exact work had to be turned out all these sights of his youth had acted on him as poetry without the aid of the poets had made a philosophy for him without the aid of philosophers a religion without the aid of theology his early ambition had been to have as effective a share as possible in this sublime labour which was peculiarly dignified by him with the name of business and though he had only been a short time under a surveyor and had been chiefly his own teacher he knew more of land, building and mining than most of the special men in the country his classification of human employments was rather crude and like the categories of more celebrated men would not be acceptable in these advanced times he divided them into business, politics preaching, learning and amusement he had nothing to say against the last four but he regarded them as a reverential pagan regarded other gods than his own in the same way he thought very well of all ranks but he would not himself have liked to be of any rank in which he had not such close contact with business as to get often honourably decorated with marks of dust and mortar, the damp of the engine or the sweet oil of the woods and fields though he had never regarded himself as other than an orthodox Christian and would argue on prevenient grace if the subject were to propose to him I think his virtual divinities were good practical schemes, accurate work and the faithful completion of undertakings his prince of darkness was a slack workman but there was no spirit of denial in Calith and the world seemed so wondrous to him that he was ready to accept any number of systems like any number of firmaments if they did not obviously interfere with the best land drainage, solid building, correct measuring and judicious boring for coal in fact he had a reverential soul of strong practical intelligence but he could not manage finance he knew values well but he had no keenness of imagination for monetary results in the shape of profit and loss and having ascertained this to his cost he determined to give up all forms of his beloved business which required that talent he gave himself up entirely to the many kinds of work which he could do without handling capital and was one of those precious men within his own district whom everybody would choose to work for them to work well charged very little and often declined to charge at all it is no wonder then that the guards were poor and lived in a small way however they did not mind it End of Chapter 24 This is a LibriVox recording All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain For more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org Middle March by George Elliott LibriVox by Madame Tusk www.rlowalrus.citesled.com Chapter 25 Love seeketh not itself to please nor for itself have any care but for another gives its ease and builds a heaven in hell's despair Love seeketh only self to please to bind another to its delight joys in another's loss of ease and builds a hell in heavens despite W. Blake Songs Experience Fred Vinzee wanted to arrive at Stone Court when Mary could not expect him and when his uncle was not downstairs in that case she might be sitting alone in the wainscoted parlor He left his horse in the yard to avoid making a noise on the gravel in front and entered the parlor without other notice than the noise of the door handle Mary was in her usual corner laughing over Mrs. Piozzi's recollections of Johnson and looked up with the fun still in her face It gradually faded as she saw Fred approach her without speaking and stand before her with his elbow on the mantelpiece looking ill She too was silent only raising her eyes to him inquiringly Mary, he began I'm good for nothing blackered I should think one of those epithets would do at a time said Mary trying to smile but feeling alarmed I know you will never think well of me any more you will think me a liar you will think me dishonest you will think I didn't care for you or your father and mother you always do make the worst of me I know I cannot deny that I should think all that of you Fred if you give me good reasons but please tell me at once what you've done I would rather know the painful truth than imagine it I owed money £160 I asked her father to put his name to a bill I thought it would not signify to him I made sure of paying the money myself and I have tried as hard as I could and now I've been so unlucky a horse has turned out badly I can only pay £50 and I can't ask my father for the money he would not give me a farthing and my uncle gave me a hundred a little while ago so what can I do and now your father has no ready money to spare and your mother will have to pay away her £92 that she has saved and she says your savings must go too you see what a poor mother poor father said Mary her eyes filling with tears and a little sob rising which she tried to repress she looked straight before her and took no notice of Fred all the consequences at home becoming present to her he too remained silent for some moments feeling more miserable than ever I couldn't have hurt you for the world, Mary he said at last you could never forgive me what does it matter whether I forgive you said Mary passionately would that make it any better for my mother to lose money that she has been earning by lessons for four years that she might send offering to Mr. Hammers should you think all that pleasant enough if I forgave you say what you like Mary, I deserve it all I don't want to say anything said Mary more quietly and my anger is of no use she dried her eyes threw aside her book, rose and fetched her sewing Fred followed her with his eyes hoping that he would meet hers and in that way find access for his imploring penitence but no, Mary could easily avoid looking upward I do care about your mother's money going he said when she was seated again and sewing quickly I wanted to ask you Mary don't you think that Mr. Featherston, if you were to tell him tell him I mean about the Prentising Alfred would advance the money I thought he's not fond of begging Fred we'd rather work for our money besides, you say that Mr. Featherston has lately given you a hundred pounds he rarely makes presents he has never made presents to us I'm sure my father will not ask him for anything and if I chose to beg of him to be of no use I am you would be sorry for me there are other things to be more sorry for than that but selfish people always think their own discomfort of more importance than anything else in the world I see enough of that every day it is hardly fair to call me selfish if you knew what things other young men do you would think me a good way off the worst I know that other people who spend a great deal of money on themselves without knowing how they shall pay must be selfish they're always thinking of what they can get for themselves and not of what other people may lose any man may be unfortunate Mary and find himself unable to pay when he meant it there's not a better man in the world than your father and yet he got into trouble how dynamic any comparison between my father and you Fred said Mary in a deep tone of indignation he never got into trouble by thinking of his own idle pleasures but because he was always thinking of the work that he was doing for other people and he has fared hard and worked hard to make good everybody's loss do you think that I shall never try to make good anything Mary it's not generous to believe the worst of a man when you have got any power over him I think you might try to use it to make him better that is what you never do however I'm going Fred ended languidly I shall never speak to you about anything again I'm very sorry for all the trouble I've caused that's all Mary had dropped her work out of her hand and looked up there's often something maternal even in a girlish love and Mary's hard experience had wrought her nature to an impressibility very different from that hard slight thing which we call girlishness Fred's last words she felt an instantaneous pang something like what a mother feels at the imagined sobs or cries of her naughty truant child which may lose itself and get harm and when looking up her eyes met his dull despairing glance her pity for him surmounted her anger and all her other anxieties oh Fred how ill you look sit down a moment don't go yet let me tell uncle that you are here he has been wondering that he has not seen you a whole week Mary spoke hurriedly saying the words that came first without knowing very well what they were but saying them in half soothing half beseeching tone and rising as if to go away to Mr. Featherstone of course Fred felt as if the clouds had parted in a gleam had come he moved and stood in her way say one word Mary and I will do anything say you will not look the worse of me will not give me up altogether if it were any pleasure to me to think ill of you said Mary in a mournful tone if it were not very painful to me how can you bear to be so contemptible when others are working and striving there are so many things to be done how can you bear to be fit for nothing in the world that is useful and with so much good in your disposition Fred you might be worth a great deal I will try to be anything you like Mary if you will only say you love me I should be ashamed to say that I love the man who must always be hanging on others and reckoning on what they would do for him what will you be when you are forty like Mr. Boyer I suppose Mrs. Beck's front parlor, fat and shabby I hope in some that he will invite you to dinner spend in your mourn and learn in a comic song oh no learn in a tune on the flute Mary's lips had begun to curl into a smile as soon as she had asked that question about Fred's future young souls are mobile and before she had ended her face had its full illumination of fun to him it was like the cessation of an ache that Mary could laugh at him and with a passive sort of smile he tried to reach her hand and said I shall tell Uncle you must see him for a moment or two Fred secretly felt that his future was guaranteed against the fulfilment of Mary's sarcastic prophecies apart from that anything which he was ready to do if she would define it he never dared in Mary's presence to approach the subject of his expectations from Mr. Featherstone and she always ignored them as if everything depended on himself but if ever he actually came into the property she must recognise the change in his position through his mind somewhat languidly before he went up to see his uncle he stayed but a little while excusing himself on the ground that he had a cold and Mary did not reappear before he left the house but as he rode home he began to be more conscious of being ill than of being melancholy when Caleb Garth arrived at Stonecourt soon after dusk she was not surprised although he seldom had leisure for paying her a visit and was not at all fond of having to talk with Mr. Featherstone the old man on the other hand felt himself ill at ease with a brother-in-law whom he could not annoy who do not mind about being considered poor and had nothing to ask of him and understood all kinds of farming and mining business better than he did but Mary had felt sure that her parents would want to see her and if her father had not come she would have obtained leave to go home for an hour or two the next day after discussing prices during tea with Mr. Featherstone Caleb rose to bid him good-bye and said Mary she took a candle into another large parlor where there was no fire and setting down the feeble light on the dark mahogany table turned round to her father and putting her arms around his neck kissed him with childish kisses which he delighted in the expression of his large brows softening as the expression of a great, beautiful dog softens when it is caressed Mary was his favourite child and whatever Susan might say and right as she was on all other subjects Caleb thought it natural that Fred or anyone else should think Mary more lovable than other girls I've got something to tell you my dear said Caleb in his hesitating way no very good news but then it might be worse about money father I think I know what it is I? How can that be? You see I've been a bit of a fool again and put my name to a bill and now it comes to pain and your mother has got part of her savings that's the worst of it and even they don't quite make things even we wanted a hundred and ten pounds your mother has ninety two and I have none to spare on the bank and she thinks that you might have some savings oh yes I have more than four and twenty pounds I thought she would come father so I put it in my bag see beautiful white notes and gold Mary took out the fondled money from her reticle and put it into her father's hand well but how we only want eighteen there put the rest back child but how did you know about it said Caleb who in his unconquerable indifference to money was beginning to be considerably concerned about the relation the affair might have to Mary's affections Fred told me this morning ah did he come on purpose yes I think so he was a good deal distressed I'm afraid Fred is not to be trusted Mary said the father with hesitating tenderness he means better than the axe perhaps but I should think it a pity for anybody's happiness stuck in him so would your mother and so should I father said Mary not looking up but putting the back of her father's hand against her cheek I don't want to pry my dear but I was afraid there might be something between you and Fred and I wanted to caution you you see Mary here came this voice became more tender he had been pushing his hand about on the table looking at it but finally he had turned his eyes on his daughter a woman that would be as good as she may has got to put up with the life her husband makes for her her mother's had to put up with a good deal because of me Mary turned the back of her father's hands to her lips and smiled at him well well nobody's perfect but here Mr. Garth took his head to help out the inadequacy of words what I'm thinking of is what it must be for a wife when she's never sure of her husband when he hasn't got the principle in him to make him more afraid of doing the wrong thing by others than of getting his own toes pinched that's the long and short bit Mary young folks may get fond of each other before they know what life is they may think it all whole day if they can only get each other but it soon turns into working day my dear however you may have more sense than most you haven't been kept in cotton wool there may be no occasion for me to say this but father trembles for his daughter you will buy yourself here don't fear for me father said Mary gravely meeting her father lies Fred has always been very good to me he is kind-hearted and affectionate and not false I think with all his self-indulgence but I will never engage myself to one who has no manly independence who goes on loitering away his time on the champ that others will provide for him you and my mother have taught me too much pride for that that's right, that's right then I'm easy said Mr. Garth taking up his hat but it's hard to run away with your own inns may I child father said Mary in her deepest tone of remonstrance take pocketfuls of love besides to the mold at home was her last word before he closed the outer door on himself suppose your father wanted your earnings said old Mr. Featherston with his usual power of unpleasant surmise when Mary returned to him he makes but a time to fit I reckon you're of an age now to be saving for yourself I consider my father and mother the best part of myself sir said Mary coldly Mr. Featherston grunted he could not deny that an ordinary sort of girl like her might be expected to be useful so he thought of another rejoinder disagreeable enough to be always outpour Poe if Reverend Vincy comes tomorrow now don't you keep him shattering let him come up to me end of Chapter 25 this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org Middlemarch by George Elliot as read for LibriVox by Madame Tusk www.rlowalrus.citesled.com Chapter 26 he beats me and I rail at him a worthy satisfaction would it were otherwise that I could beat him while he railed at me Troilus and Cressida but Fred did not go to Stonecourt the next day for reasons that were quite peremptory from those visits to unsanitary Hounsley streets in search of diamond he had brought back not only a bad bargain in horse flesh but the further misfortune of some ailment which for a day or two had deemed mere depression and headache but which got so much worse when he returned from his visit to Stonecourt that going into the dining room he threw himself on the sofa and in answer to his mother's anxious question said I feel very ill I think you must send for Wrench Wrench came but did not apprehend anything serious spoke of a slight derangement and did not speak of coming again on the morrow he had a due value for the Vincy's house but the warriest men are apt to be doled by routine and on worried mornings will sometimes go through their business with the zest of the daily bell-ringer Mr. Wrench was a small, neat, bilious man with a well-dressed wig he had a laborious practice, an irascible temper a lymphatic wife and seven children and he was already rather late before setting out on a four-mile drive to meet Dr. Minchin on the other side of Tipton and the VCs of Hicks, a rural practitioner having increased middle-march practice in that direction great statesman error and why not small medical men Mr. Wrench did not neglect sending the usual white parcels which this time had black and drastic contents their effect was not alleviating to poor Fred who, however unwilling as he is said to believe that he was in for an illness rose at his usual easy hour the next morning and went downstairs, meaning to breakfast he succeeded in nothing but in sitting and shivering by the fire Mr. Wrench was again sent for but was gone on his rounds and Mrs. Vincie, seeing her darlings, changed looks and general misery, began to cry and said she was sent for Dr. Sprague and nonsense, mother, it is nothing said Fred, putting out his hot dry hander I shall soon be all right I must have taken cold in that nasty damp ride Mama said Rosamond who was seated near the window the dining-room windows looked on that highly respectable street called Loic Gate there is Mr. Lidgate stopping to speak to someone if I were you I would call him in he has cured Ellen Bulls Road they say he cures everyone Mrs. Vincie sprang to the window and opened it in an instant thinking only of Fred and not of medical etiquette Lidgate was only two yards off on the other side of some iron palisading and turned around at the sudden sound of the sash before she called to him in two minutes he was in the room and Rosamond went out after waiting just long enough to show a pretty anxiety conflicting with her sense of what was becoming Lidgate had to hear a narrative in which Mrs. Vincie's mind insisted with remarkable instinct on every point of minor importance especially on what Mr. Wrench had said and had not said about coming again that there might be an awkward affair with Wrench Lidgate saw at once but the ease was serious enough to make him dismiss that consideration he was convinced that Fred was in the pink skin stage of typhoid fever and that he had taken just the wrong medicines he must go to bed immediately must have a regular nurse and various appliances and precautions must be used about which Lidgate was particular poor Mrs. Vincie's terror at these indications of danger found vent in such words as came most easily she thought at very ill usage on the part of Mr. Wrench who had attended their house so many years in preference to Dr. Peacock though Mr. Peacock was equally a friend why Mr. Wrench should neglect her children more than others she could not for the life of her understand he had not neglected Mrs. Larcher's they had the measles nor indeed when Mrs. Vincie had wished that he should and if anything should happen here poor Mrs. Vincie's spirit quite broke down and her noob throat and good human face were sadly convulsed this was in the hall out of Fred's hearing but Rosamond had opened the drawing room door and now came forward anxiously Lidgate apologized for Mr. Wrench said the symptoms yesterday might have been disguising and that this form of fever was very equivocal in its beginnings he would go immediately to the druggists and have a prescription made up in order to lose no time but he would write to Mr. Wrench and tell him what had been done but you must come again you must go on attending Fred I can't have my boy left to anybody who may come or not I bear nobody ill will thank God and Mr. Wrench saved me in the plurisy but he'd better let me die if I will meet Mr. Wrench there then shall I said Lidgate really believing that Wrench was not well prepared to deal wisely with a case of this kind pray make that arrangement Mr. Lidgate said Rosamond coming to her mother's aid and supporting her arm to lead her away when Mr. Wincey came home he was very angry with Wrench and did not care if he never came into his house again Lidgate should go on now whether Wrench liked it or not it was no joke to have fever in the house everybody must be sent to now not come to dinner on Thursday and Pritchard needn't get up any wine Brandy was the best thing against infection I shall drink Brandy added Mr. Wincey emphatically as much as to say this was not an occasion for firing with blank cartridges he's an uncommonly unfortunate lad, his friend he'd need to have some luck by and by to make up for all this as I don't know who'd have an eldest son don't say so, Wincey said the mother with a quivering lip if you don't want him to be taken from me I will warrant you to death Lucy that I can see said Mr. Wincey more mildly however Wrench shall know what I think of the matter what Mr. Wincey thought confusedly was that the fever might somehow have been hindered if Wrench had shown the proper solicitude about his the mayor's family I'm the last man to give in to the cry about new doctors and new passings either whether they're bullstrows men or not but Wrench shall know what I think take it as he will Wrench did not take it at all well Lidgate was as politeness he could be in his offhand way but politeness in a man who has placed you at a disadvantage is only an additional exasperation especially if he happens to have been an object of dislike beforehand decisioners used to be an irritable species susceptible on the point of honor and Mr. Wrench was one of the most irritable among them he did not refuse to meet Lidgate in the evening but his temper was somewhat tried on the occasion he had to hear Mrs. Wincey say oh Mr. Wrench what have I ever done you should use me so to go away and never to come again my boy might have been stretched to corpse Mr. Wincey who had been keeping up a sharp fire on the enemy infection and was a good deal heated in consequence started up when Mr. Wrench come in and went in the hall to let him know what he thought I'll tell you what Wrench this is beyond a joke said the mayor who of late had had to rebuke offenders with an official heir and who broadened himself by putting his thumbs in his armholes to let fever get unawares into a house like this there are some things that ought to be actionable and are not so that's my opinion but irrational approaches were easier to bear than the sense of being instructed or rather the sense that a younger man like Lidgate inwardly considered the need of instruction for in point of fact Mr. Wrench afterwards said Lidgate paraded flighty foreign notions which would not wear he swallowed his eye for the moment but he afterwards wrote to decline further attendance in the case the house might be a good one but Mr. Wrench was not going to chuckle to anybody on a professional matter he reflected with much probability on his side that Lidgate would by and by be caught tripping too and that his sovereign would by and by recoil on himself he threw out biting remarks on Lidgate's tricks, worthy only of a quack to get himself a factitious reputation with credulous people that count about cures was never got up by sound practitioners this was a point on which Lidgate smarted as much as Wrench could desire to be puffed by ignorance was not only humiliating but perilous and not more enviable than the reputation of the weather-profit he was impatient of the foolish expectations that his work must be carried on and likely enough to damage himself as much as Mr. Wrench could wish by an unprofessional openness however Lidgate was installed as medical attendant on the Vincies and the event was a subject of general conversation in middle-march some said that the Vincies had behaved scandalously that Mr. Vincy had threatened Wrench and that Mrs. Vincy had accused him of poisoning her son others were of the opinion that Mr. Lidgate's passing by was providential that he was powerfully clever in fevers that Mr. Lidgate was in the right to bring him forward many people believed that Lidgate's coming to the town at all was really due to Boulstrode and Mrs. Taft who was always counting stitches and gathered her information in misleading fragments caught between the rows of her knitting had got it into her head that Mr. Lidgate was a natural son of Boulstrode's a fact which seemed to justify her suspicions of evangelical layman she one day communicated this piece of knowledge to Mrs. Fairbrother who did not fail to tell her son of it I'm not thinking in Boulstrode, but I should be sorry to think it of Mr. Lidgate One mother, said Mr. Fairbrother after an explosive laugh, you know very well that Lidgate is of a good family in the north he never heard of Boulstrode before he came here that is satisfactory so far as Mr. Lidgate is concerned counten said the old lady with an error precision but as to Boulstrode, the report may be true of some other son End of Chapter 26 This is a LibriVox recording All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org Middlemarch by George Elliott as read for LibriVox by Madame Tusk www.rlowalrus.sitesled.com Chapter 27 Let the high muse chant Love's Olympian mortals and must sing of man An eminent philosopher among my friends who can dignify even your ugly furniture by lifting it into serene light of science has shown me this pregnant little fact Your pier glass, or extensive surface of polished steel made to be rubbed by a housemaid will be minutely and multi-dunewisly scratched in all directions but place it now against a lighted candle as a centre of illumination and lo, the scratches will seem to themselves in a fine series of concentric circles around that little sun it is demonstrable that the scratches are going everywhere impartially and it is only your candle which produces the fluttering illusion of concentric arrangement it's light falling with an exclusive optical selection these things are a parable the scratches are events and the candle is the egoism of any person now absent of Miss Vincy, for example Rosamond had a providence of her own who had kindly made her more charming than other girls and who seemed to have arranged Fred's illness and Mr. Wrench's mistake in order to bring her and Lidgate within effective proximity it would have been to contraven these arrangements if Rosamond had consented to go away to Stonecourt or elsewhere as her parents wished her to especially since Mr. Lidgate thought the precaution needless therefore, while Miss Morgan and the children were sent away to a farmhouse the morning after Fred's illness had declared itself Rosamond refused to leave only Papa and Mama poor Mama indeed was an object to touch any creature born of woman and Mr. Vincy who doted on his wife was more alarmed on her account than on Fred's but for his insistence that she would have taken no rest her brightness was all be dimmed unconscious of her costume which had always been so fresh and gay she was like a sick bird with a languid eye and plumage ruffled her senses dulled to the sights and sounds that used to interest her and the feeling in which she seemed to be wandering out of her reach tore her heart after her first outburst against Mr. Wrench she went about very quietly her one low cry was to Lidgate she would follow him out of the room and put her hand on his arm moaning out save my boy once she pleaded he has always been good to me Mr. Lidgate he never had a hard word for his mother as if poor Fred's sufferings were an accusation against him all the deepest fibres of the mother's memory were stirred and the young man whose voice took a gentler tone when he spoke to her was one with the babe whom she had loved with a love new to her before he was born I have good hope Mrs. Wincey Lidgate would say come down with me and let us talk about the food in that way he led it to the parlor where Rosamond was and made a change for her surprising her into taking some tea or broth which had been prepared for her there was a constant understanding between him and Rosamond on these matters he almost always saw her before going to the sick room and she appealed to him as to what she could do for mama her presence of mind and a droidness in carrying out his hints were admirable and it is not wonderful that the idea of seeing Rosamond began to mingle itself with his interest in the case especially when the critical stage was passed and he began to feel confident of Fred's recovery in the more doubtful time he had advised calling in Dr. Sprague who, if he could, would rather have remained neutral on Wincey's account but after two consultations was left to Lidgate and there was every reason to make him assiduous morning and evening he was at Mr. Wincey's and gradually the visits became cheerful as Fred became simply feeble and lay not only in need of the utmost petting but conscious of it so that Mrs. Wincey felt as if, after all the illness had made a festival for her tenderness both father and mother held it and added reason for good spirits when old Mr. Fethesdon sent messages by Lidgate saying that Fred must make haste and get well as he, Peter Fethesdon, could not do without him and missed his visit sadly the old man himself was getting bedridden Mrs. Wincey told these messages to Fred when he could listen and he turned towards her his delicate pinched face from which all the thick blonde hair had been cut away and in which the eyes seemed to have got larger yearning for some word about Mary wondering what she felt about his illness no words passed his lips but to hear with the eyes belongs to love's rare wit and the mother in the fullness of her heart not only divined Fred's longing but felt ready for any sacrifice in order to satisfy him I can only see my boy strong again she said in her loving folly and who knows perhaps master of stone court and he can marry anybody he likes then mother they won't have me mother said Fred the illness had made him childish and tears came as he spoke oh take a bit of jelly my dear said Mrs. Wincey secretly incredulous of any such refusal she never left Fred's side when her husband was not in the house and thus Rosamond was in the usual position of being much alone that gate naturally never thought of staying long with her yet it seemed that the brief impersonal conversations they had together were creating that peculiar intimacy which consists in shyness they were obliged to look at each other and speaking and somehow the looking could not be carried through as the matter of course which it really was hard to feel this sort of consciousness unpleasant and one day looked down or anywhere like an ill-worked puppet but this turned out badly the next day Rosamond looked down and the consequence was that when their eyes met again both were more conscious than before there was no help for this in science and as the gate did not want to flirt there seemed to be no help for it in folly it was therefore a relief when neighbors no longer considered the house in quarantine and when the chances of seeing Rosamond alone were very much reduced but that intimacy of mutual embarrassment in which each feels that the other is feeling something having once existed its effect is not to be done away with talk about the weather and other well-bred topics is apt to seem a hollow device and behavior can hardly become easy unless it frankly recognizes a mutual fascination which of course did not mean anything deep or serious this was the way in which Rosamond and Lidgate slid gracefully into ease and made their intercourse lively again the visitors came and went as usual there was once more music in the drawing room and all the extra hospitality of Mr. Vincy's mayorality returned Lidgate whenever he could took his seat by Rosamond's side and lingered to hear her music calling himself her captive meaning all the while not to be her captive the preposterousness of the notion that he could at once set up a satisfactory establishment as a married man was a sufficient guarantee against danger this play at being a little in love and did not interfere with graver pursuits flotation after all was not necessarily a singeing process Rosamond on her part had never enjoyed the days so much in her life before she was sure of being admired by someone worth captivating and she did not distinguish flotation from love either in herself or in another she seemed to be sailing with a fair wind just with her she would go and her thoughts were much occupied with a handsome house in Lidgate which she hoped would by and by be vacant she was quite determined when she was married to rid herself a droidly of all the visitors who were not agreeable to her at her father's and she imagined the drawing-room in her favourite house with various styles of furniture certainly her thoughts were much occupied with Lidgate himself he seemed to her almost perfect if he had known his notes so that his enchantment under her music had been less like an emotional elephants and if he had been able to discriminate better the refinements of her taste in dress she could hardly have mentioned a deficiency in him how different he was from young Plymdale or Mr. Kias Larcher those young men had not a notion of French and could speak on no subject the striking knowledge except perhaps the dying and carrying trades which of course they were ashamed to mention they were middle-marched gentry elated with their silver-headed whips and satin stockings but embarrassed in their manners and timidly jocose even Fred was above them having at least the accent and manner of a university man whereas Lidgate was always listened to bore himself with careless politeness of conscious superiority and seemed to have the right clothes on by a certain natural affinity without ever having to think about them Rosamond was proud when he entered the room and when he approached her with a distinguishing smile she had a delicious sense that she was the object of enviable homage if Lidgate had been aware of all the pride he excited in that delicate bosom he might have been just as well pleased as any other man even the most densely ignorant of humoral bathology or fibrous tissue he held it one of the prettiest attitudes of the feminine mind to adore a man's preeminence without too precise a knowledge of what it consisted in but Rosamond was not one of those helpless girls who betray themselves unawares and whose behavior is awkwardly driven by their impulses instead of being steered by wary grace and propriety do you imagine that her rapid forecast and rumination concerning house furniture and society were ever discernible in her conversation on the contrary she would have expressed the prettiest surprise and disapprobation if she had heard that another young lady had been detected in that immodest prematureness indeed would probably have disbelieved in its possibility for Rosamond never showed any unbecoming knowledge and was always that combination of correct sentiments music dancing drawing elegant no-writing private album for extracted verse and perfect blonde loveliness which made the irresistible woman for the doomed man of that date think no unfair evil effort pray for she had no wicked plots nothing sordid or mercenary in fact she never thought of money except just something necessary which other people would always provide she was not in the habit of devising falsehoods and if her statements were no direct clue to fact why they were not intended in that light they were among her elegant accomplishments intended to please nature had inspired many arts in finishing Mrs. Levin's favorite people who by general consent freds accepted was a rare compound of beauty cleverness and amiability lidgate founded more and more agreeable to be with her and there was no constraint now there was a delightful interchange of influence in their eyes and what they said had that superfluity of meaning for them which is observable with some sense of flatness by a third person still they had no interviews or asides from which a third person needed been excluded in fact they flirted and lidgate were secure in the belief that they did nothing else if a man could not love and be wise surely he could flirt and be wise at the same time really the men in middle-march except Mr. Fairbrother were great bores and lidgate did not care about commercial politics or cards what was he to do for relaxation he was often invited to the bolsteroids but the girls there were hardly out of the school room and Mrs. Bolsteroids naive way of conciliating piety and worldliness the nothingness of this life and the desirability of that glass the consciousness at once of filthy rags and the best Damasque was not a sufficient relief from the weight of her husband's invariable seriousness the Vincy's house with all its faults was the pleasanter by contrast besides it nourished Rosamond sweet to look at as a half-opened blush rose and adorned with accomplishments for the refined amusement of man but he made some enemies other than medical by his success with Miss Vincy one evening he came into the drawing room when several other visitors were there the card table had drawn off the dealers and Mr. Ned Plimdale one of the good matches in Little March though not one of its leading minds was in tetepe with Rosamond he had brought the last keepsake the gorgeous watered silk publication which marked modern progress at that time and he considered himself very fortunate that he could be the first to look over it with her dwelling on the ladies and gentlemen with shiny copper plate cheeks and copper plate smiles and pointing to comic verses capital and sentimental stories is interesting Rosamond was gracious and Mr. Ned was satisfied that he had the very best thing in art and literature as a medium for paying addresses the very thing to please a nice girl he had also reasons deep rather than ostensible for being satisfied with his own appearance to superficial observers his chin had too vanishing an aspect looking as if it were being gradually reabsorbed and it did indeed cause him some difficulty about the fit of his satin stocks for which chins were at that time useful I think the honourable Mrs. S is something like you said Mr. Ned he kept the book open at the bewitching portrait and looked at it rather languishingly her back was very large she seems to have sat for that said Rosamond not meaning any satire but thinking how red young Plimdale's hands were and wondering why Lidgate did not come she went on with her tatting all the while I did not say she was as beautiful as you are said Mr. Ned venturing to look from the portrait to its rival I suspect she was being an adroit flatterer said Rosamond feeling sure that she should have to reject this young man a second time but now Lidgate came in the book was closed before he reached Rosamond's corner and as he took his seat with easy confidence on the other side of her young Plimdale's jaw fell like a barometer towards the cheerless side of change Rosamond enjoyed not only Lidgate's presence but its effect of light to excite jealousy what a late comer you are she said as they shook hands Mama had given you up a while ago how do you find Fred? as usual going on well but slowly I want him to go away to Stone Court for example but your Mama seems to have some objection poor fellow said Rosamond prettily you will see Fred so changed she added turning to the other suitor we have looked to Mr. Lidgate as our guardian angel doing this illness while Lidgate, drawing the keepsake towards him and opening it gave a scornful laugh and tossed up his chill as if in wonderment at human folly what are you laughing at so profanely said Rosamond with bland neutrality I wonder which would turn out to be the silliest the engravings or the writing here said Lidgate in his most convinced tone while he turned over the pages quickly seeming to see all through the book in no time and showing his large white hands to much advantage as Rosamond thought coming out of a church did you ever see such a sugared invention as Elizabethans used to say did any haberdasher ever look so smirking well I will answer for it the story makes him one of the first gentlemen in the land who is so severe I am frightened at you said Rosamond keeping her amusement duly moderate poor young Plyndale had lingered with admiration over this very engraving and his spirit was stirred there are a great many celebrated people writing in the keepsake at all events that he in a tone once peaked and timid this is the first time I have heard it called silly I think I shall turn round on you and accuse you of being a goth said Rosamond looking at Lidgate with a smile I suspect you know nothing about Lady Blessington and L.E.L. Rosamond herself was not without relish for these writers but she did not render the commit herself by admiration and was alive to the slightest hint that anything was not according to Lidgate in the very highest taste but Sir Walter Scott I suppose Mr. Lidgate knows him said young Plyndale a little cheered by this advantage oh I read no literature now Sir Lidgate shutting the book and pushing it away I read so much when I was allowed that I suppose it will last me all my life I used to know Scott's poems by heart I should like to know when you left off said Rosamond because then I might be sure that I knew something which you did not know Mr. Lidgate would say that is not worth knowing said Mr. Ned purposely caustic on the contrary Sir Lidgate showing no smart but smiling with exasperating confidence at Rosamond it would be worth knowing by the fact that Mr. Vincy could tell me young Plyndale soon went to look at the whist playing thinking that Lidgate was one of the most conceited unpleasant fellows it had ever been his ill fortune to meet how fresh you are said Rosamond inwardly delighted do you see that you have given offence what is it Mr. Plyndale's book oh I'm sorry I didn't think about it I should begin to admit what you said of yourself when you first came here and wanted teaching by the birds well there is a bird who can teach me what she will don't I listen to her willingly to Rosamond it seemed as if she and Lidgate were as good as engaged that there were some time to be engaged had long been an idea in her mind and ideas we know tend to a more solid kind of existence the necessary materials being at hand it is true Lidgate had the counter idea of remaining unengaged but this was a mere negative a shadow east by our resolves which themselves were capable of shrinking circumstance was almost sure to be on the side of Rosamond's idea which had a shaping activity and looked through watchful blue eyes whereas Lidgate's lay blind and unconcerned as a jellyfish which gets melted without knowing it that evening when he went home he looked at his files to see how a process of maceration was going on with undisturbed interest and he wrote out his daily notes with as much precision as usual the reveries from which it was difficult for ideal constructions of something else than Rosamond's virtues and the primitive tissue was still his fair unknown moreover he was beginning to feel some zest for the growing though half suppressed view between him and the other medical men which was likely to become more manifest now that Bustrod's method of managing the new hospital was about to be declared and there were various inspiring signs that his non-acceptance by some of Peacock's patients might be counterbalanced by the impression he had produced in other quarters later when he had happened to overtake Rosamond on the Loic Road and had got down from his horse to walk by her side until he had quite protected her from a passing drove he had been stopped by a servant on horseback with a message calling him to a house of some importance where Peacock had never attended and it was the second instance of this kind the servant was Sir James Chetum's and the house was Loic Manor End of Chapter 27 This is a LibriVox recording All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain For more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org Middlemarch by George Elliott as read for LibriVox by Madame Tusk www.rlowalrus.citesled.com Chapter 28 First Gentleman All times are good to seek your wedded home bringing a mutual delight Second Gentleman Why true, the calendar hath not an evil day for souls made one by love and even death for sweetness if it came like rolling waves while they too clasped each other and foresaw no life apart Mr. and Mrs. Casablan returning from their wedding journey arrived at Loic Manor in the middle of January A light snow was falling as they descended at the door and in the morning when Dorothea passed through her dressing-room Avenue the blue-green Boudoir that we know of she saw the long avenue of lines lifting their trunks from a white earth and spreading white branches against the done and motionless sky The distant flat shrank in uniform whiteness and low-hanging uniformity of cloud The very furniture in the room seemed to have shrunks since she saw it before The stag in the tapestry looked more like a ghost in his ghostly blue-green world The volumes of polite literature in the bookcase looked more like immovable imitations of books The bright fire of dry oak vows burning on the logs seemed an incongruous renewal of life and glow like the figure of Dorothea herself as she entered carrying the red leather cases containing the cameos for Celia She was glowing from her morning toilet as only helpful youth could glow There was gem-like brightness on her coiled hair and in her hazel eyes There was warm red life in her lips Her throat had a breathing whiteness above the differing white of the fur which itself seemed to wind about her neck and clean down her blue-gray pellets with a tenderness gathered from her own a sentient, commingled innocence which kept its loveliness against that crystalline purity of the outdoor snow As she lay the cameo cases on the table in the bow window she unconsciously kept her hands on them immediately absorbed in looking out on the still white enclosure which made her visible world Mr. Casabon had risen early complaining of palpitation was in a library giving audience to his curate Mr. Tucker By and by Celia would come in her quality of bridesmaid as well as sister and through the next weeks there would be wedding visits received and given all in continuance of that transitional life understood to correspond for the excitement of bridal felicity and keeping up the sense of busy ineffectiveness as of a dream which the dreamer begins to suspect The duties of her married life contemplated as so great beforehand seemed to be shrinking with the furniture and the white vapor-walled landscape The clear heights where she expected to walk in full communion had become difficult to see even in her imagination The delicious repose of the soul in a complete superior had been shaken into uneasy effort and alarmed with dim presentiment When would the days begin of that active, wifely devotion which was to strengthen her husband's life felt her own? Never, perhaps as she had preconceived them but somehow still somehow In the solemnly pledged union of her life duty would present itself in some new form of inspiration and give a new meaning to wifely love Meanwhile there was the snow and the low arc of done vapor There was the stifling oppression of that gentlewoman's world where everything was done for her and none asked for her aid where the sense of connection with a manifold pregnant existence had to be kept up painfully as an inward vision instead of coming from without in claims that would have shaped her energies What shall I do? Whatever you please, my dear That had been her brief history since she had left off learning morning lessons and practicing silly rhythms on the hated piano Marriage, which was to bring guidance into worthy and imperative occupation, had not yet freed her from the gentlewoman's oppressive liberty It had not even filled her leisure with ruminous joy of unchecked tenderness Her blooming, full-pulsed youth stood there in a moral imprisonment which made itself one with the chill colourless, narrowed landscape with the shrunken furniture the never-read books and the ghostly stag in a pale, fantastic world that seemed to be vanishing from the daylight In the first few minutes when Dorothea looked out she felt nothing but the dreary oppression Then came a keen remembrance and turning away from the window on the room. The ideas and hopes which were living in her mind when she first saw this room nearly three months before were present now only as memories. She judged them as we judged transient and departed things. All existence seemed to beat with a lower pulse than her own, and her religious faith was a solitary cry, the struggle out of a nightmare in which every object was withering and shrinking away from her Each remembered thing in the room was disenchanted, was headened as an unlit transparency until her wandering gaze came to the group of miniatures And there at last she saw something which had gathered new breath and meaning It was the miniature of Mr. Cazabon's Aunt Julia who had made the unfortunate marriage of Will Latticella's grandmother Dorothea could fancy that it was alive now the delicate woman's face which yet had a headstrong look a peculiarity difficult to interpret Was it only her friends who thought the marriage unfortunate, or did she herself find it out to be a mistake and taste the salt bitterness of her tears in the merciful silence of the night What breaths of experience Dorothea seemed to have passed over since she first looked at this miniature She felt a new companionship with it as if it had an ear for her and could see how she was looking at it Here was a woman who had known some difficulty about marriage Nay, the colours deepened The lip and chin seemed to get larger The hair and eyes seemed to be sending out light The face was masculine and beamed on her without full gaze which tells her on whom it falls that she is too interesting for the slightest movement of her eyelid to pass unnoticed and uninterpreted The vivid presentation came like a pleasant glow to Dorothea She felt herself smiling and turning from the miniature sat down and looked up as if she were again talking to a figure in front of her But the smile disappeared as she went on meditating aloud Oh! it was cruel to speak so How sad! how dreadful! She rose quickly and went out of the room hurrying along the corridor with the irresistible pulse to go and see her husband and inquire if she could do anything for him Perhaps Mr. Tucker was gone and Mr. Kazabon was alone in the library She felt as if all her mornings gloom would vanish if she could see her husband glad because of her presence But when she reached the head of the dark oak stairs there was Celia coming up Hello, there was Mr. Brooke changing welcomes and congratulations with Mr. Kazabon Dodo said Celia in her quiet staccato and then kissed her sister whose arms encircled her and said no more I think they both cried a little in a furtive manner while Dorothea ran downstairs to greet her uncle I need not ask how you are, my dear said Mr. Brooke after kissing her forehead Rome has agreed with you, I see happiness, frescoes the antique, that sort of thing Very pleasant to see you back again and you understand all about art now, eh? But Kazabon is a little pale, I tell him a little pale, you know studying hard in his holidays is carrying it rather too far I overdid it at one time Mr. Brooke still held Dorothea's hands but had turned his face to Mr. Kazabon about topography, ruins, temples I thought I had a clue, but I saw it would carry me too far and nothing might come of it you may go on any length and that sort of thing and nothing may come of it, you know? I'm pleased with some anxiety at the idea that those who saw him afresh after absence might be aware of signs which he had not noticed Nothing to alarm you, my dear said Mr. Brooke, observing her expression a little English beef and mutton will soon make a difference it was all very well to look pale setting for the portrait of Aquinas, you know we got your letter just in time but to Aquinas now, he was a little too subtle wasn't he, doesn't anybody read Aquinas? He is not indeed an author adapted to superficial minds said Mr. Kazabon, meeting these timely questions with dignified patients You would like coffee in your room, Uncle? said Dorothea, coming to the rescue Yes, and you must go to Celia She has great news to tell you, you know I leave it all to her The blue-green boudoir looked much more cheerful when Celia was seated there in a pelice exactly like her sister's surveying the cameos with a placid satisfaction while the conversation passed on to other topics Do you think it's nice to go to Rome on a wedding journey? said Celia, with her ready, delicate blush which Dorothea was used to on the smallest occasions It would not suit all Not you, dear, for example said Dorothea quietly No one would ever know what she thought of a wedding journey in Rome Mrs. Cadvaleta says it is nonsense people going on a long journey when they are married She says they get tired to death of each other and can't quarrel comfortably as they would at home and Lady Tetham says she went to Bath Celia's colour changed again and again to come and go with tidings from the heart as if a running messenger had been It must mean more than Celia's blushing usually did Celia, has something happened? said Dorothea in a tone full of sisterly feeling Have you really any great news to tell me? It was because you went away, Dodo there was nobody but me for the time to talk to said Celia with a certain rogishness in her eyes I understand, it is as I used to hope and believe, said Dorothea her sister's face between her hands and looking at her half anxiously Celia's marriage seemed more serious than it used to It was only three days ago said Celia and Lady Tetham is very kind and are you happy? Yes, we are not going to be married yet because everything is to be got ready and I don't want to be married so very soon because I think it is nice to be engaged and we shall be married all our lives after I do believe you could not marry better kitty said James is a good honourable man said Dorothea warmly he has gone on with the cottages, Dodo he will tell you about them when he comes shall you be glad to see him Of course I shall, how can you ask me I was only afraid you would be getting so learned said Celia, regarding Mr. Kazabon's learning as a kind of damp which might in due time saturate a neighbouring body End of Chapter 28