 We invite you to enjoy life, life with Luigi, a new comedy show created by Psy Howard, and starring that celebrated actor Mr. J. Carol Nash in the title role of Luigi Vasco with Alan Reed as Miss Wally. A year ago, when Luigi Vasco left Italy to start his new life in America, he promised his mother that he would write her and tell her about his adventures. So now, we look over Luigi's shoulder as he writes another letter to Mama Vasco in Italy. Dear Mamma Mia, it's been one year since I left Italy to come to America. America is a wonderful country. It is so big to make a man feel big to be part of. But there is one thing I hear that makes me feel very small. Vasco Wally is a daughter. Vasco Wally never leaves me alone. Always the same. When are you gonna marry my Rosa? Mamma Mia, I never marry her. I stay bachelor. So I'm a happy man because in the morning, when the sun shines, I take all the antique chair outside of my store and I sit for a little while and adjust the relax. This I do this morning when my 12-year-old general manager, Jimmy O'Connor, he says to me. Boss, did you sell anything today? Yes. Great. What did you sell? This is a chair. I'm a sittin' there. Well, who'd you sell it to? Me. Boss, I just can't understand you. What's wrong with me buying a chair? I love this chair. I pay $40 for it. I sell it to myself for $70. It's a key, boss. No more talking, Jimmy. I'm relaxed. And you gotta get to school. You'll be late. Okay, boss. But if a customer comes by and likes that chair, please stand up. Go buy a chair. He's a nice boy, Jimmy, but too much of the businessman. I is nice to just sit and think about things. Little things and the big things. Little things like a sun out of my face and a good feeling inside. And the bigger things like me, Luigi Basco sitting in front of his own store in Chicago, city of the United States of America. I feel good. Feels good. America, I love you. You like a person. Luigi, my friend. Hello, Luigi. Hello, hello. Hello, Pasquale. From my store, I see you sit in the sun. So I say, Pasquale, we have a talk with Luigi. About what, Pasquale? Yes. How many chances do you give me? One. Rossa. Right. Luigi, I make up for my mind. You gotta get him married. Who is a Pasquale? I relax at the end of the sun. I don't want to talk about the Rossa. Can you talk about something else? All right, all right. Don't get excited. I don't gotta talk about a Rossa. I can talk about other things. Okay. We talk about other things. Well, I'm not happy talking about other things. What do you promise? You got it. All right, all right. It's a fine morning, Luigi. Super, Pasquale. It's a fine morning. It's only one way to appreciate a morning like this, like me. I'm a wake up. I'm here, my wife in the kitchen. I'm a smell of the coffee. I'm a go in. She's got a fine of breakfast. That's how it is with a wife. Are you like a baby? Fine. Tomorrow I come over. I have a breakfast with you. That's not what I mean. You need a wife to make a breakfast in your own kitchen. That's a nicer Pasquale, if you're a wife and no mind to come and over. Please, Luigi, don't make me mad. You know what I'm talking about. See, what do you always talk about, the Rossa? But to now I'm a relax. I don't want to talk. Luigi, don't forget, you owe me 800 dollars to start an antique store. I only lend you this money so you marry my Rossa. Why, you know, go through with a bargain? Because a Rossa isn't no bargain. Also, you never tell me this the one I asked about in the money. Luigi, once in a parol, we gotta settle this. Please, Pasquale. It's the time, man, you'll raise. You think about a marriage. I think about it when I find a girl. What do you think a Rossa is? You see, that's even you're not sure. Luigi, you make me mad. Now, I'm gonna tell you finally, you already find a girl. Rossa, she's for you. No. Oh, listen, Luigi, Rossa's not to get any younger. Only fatter. She's not the fatter. She's a jolly. Is a lot of jolly. Now, listen to me, Luigi, a bachelor life is a no-life for you. Just to thank you. You're hungry. You wanted somebody to cook for you. There's a Rossa. There's a Rossa. Then maybe you wanted somebody for the romance. There's a Rossa. There's a Rossa. You decided to have a family to treat Bambino's. There's a Rossa. There's a Rossa. You get old. You want a company. There's a Rossa. There's a Rossa. You died. Then you want a loyal wife to put a flower on your grave. But there's a Rossa. Please, now I'm dead. The maker leave me alone. Okay, okay. I stopped talking about a Rossa again. I talk about something else. What do you have for breakfast this morning? This is bread, glass of milk. I make it myself. Poor countryman, Luigi. You know what I'm having for breakfast? I've got a sausage. You made it just the right with a garlic with a little spaghetti. On the side. Then I have eggs. You made it just the right with a butter and a little more spaghetti. On the side. Then to wash it down, I get a brown coffee. You made it just the right with a cream with a sugar and a little more spaghetti. On the side. And then I have the orange juice. With a spaghetti on the side? No, Luigi. With the orange juice, I have a ravioli. On the side. How you like a breakfast like a death thing? Oh, Pascuali. I know I have a breakfast like a death. Since I live in Italy, and my mom, she make it for me. It's a funny thing, but unless my nose is she lies, I'm a smell of breakfast like a death coming from your kitchen. That's impossible. But I smell it too. That's very strange, Luigi. Who could have been back there? Papa, why do you ask questions like that? I'm back here. Well, it's a Rossa. What a surprise. How are you getting to Luigi's kitchen? Papa, you crazy? You know how I get in Luigi's kitchen? You wake me up at five in the morning, you buy me new apron, you send me over to cook, and then you... All right, but turn up your face. You get it back in the kitchen, and Papa's a-headlin' everything. Okay, Papa. Hey, Pascuali, what are you doing? Please, Luigi, is that all you can talk about, a Rossa? We'll talk about something else. No, now is the necessary to talk about Rossa. What's she doing in my kitchen? Okay, I explained. Luigi, you're not fair to yourself or to Rossa. You never give yourself a chance at the scene. Maybe you like a Rossa. She'll appreciate it. Go in the side, eat, talk. Maybe you like her. But Pascuali, I... Luigi, just a breakfast. Go in the side, eat. But Pascuali... Please, Luigi, you make me nervous. So go in and sit at the table and talk with her. It's like a make-up-believe-a-marriage. See how you like it. A make-up-believe-a-marriage to Rossa? Just for ten minutes. So what do you say? I want a divorce. Thanks, Luigi. I'm not asking you for much. You're just that you give a Rossa a chance. No. Look, she's a make-up, nice to breakfast. If you was wrong with the waste of food, go out in and eat, eh? Well, all right. I go in and eat. But that's all I do. No, you're talking to my boy, go ahead. Please, stop a portion. Hello, Rossa. Hello, Luigi. I come to eat the breakfast, do you make? Yes, Luigi. Sit down, everything's ready on the table. You like my new apron? That's for me the spaghetti. You like me, Luigi? Mmm, it's a good spaghetti. Oh, Luigi, you make me so happy. Please, I only say it's a good spaghetti. Yes. Oh, don't, don't be sad, Rossa. You and me, we'd be good friends, huh? Here, here's an African. Don't cry. Oh, I wipe away one tear that you'll miss. It's on Alaska chin. I don't believe in my eyes. Oh, it's a matter for Squally. My Rossa, she's a sahab fish, she's a cry. But Papa. Mother for Squally. Don't explain it to her, you've got to my blessing. But Papa. Please, Rossa, you've done your part, and now Papa's to do his part. You go back and help your mom. I'll make all of your arrangements. Okay, Papa. Well, Luigi, we're going to have a big wedding. I have a hundred people there. Ninety-nine. I'm not going to show it up. What? You make a mistake. I'm not going to marry Rossa. What do you mean? I'm going to see you try to kiss her, I'm going to see her cry. Either one is a mean of marriage. But Squally, not try to trick me. I wasn't nice with her, Rossa. But I'm not going to marry her. Oh, you're getting me so mad after all of my trouble. This is all you can say to me? No. Thanks for the breakfast. Luigi, you make me so angry. Someday I'm going to tell the police. Squally, what do you mean? Isn't our crime enough to marry Rossa? No, no. But he's against the law for a bachelor man to adopt a little boy without a mama. That's what I mean. You mean it, Jimmy O'Connor? But everybody know he live with me. In America, a boy must have a mother. If somebody's a tele-policeman, you're going to have to give him up. Who would tell us such a thing? Somebody who don't like you and I don't like you. I don't give up, Jimmy. I go to jail and he go with me. He's like my son, my friend, my only friend. Luigi, boy needs a mother. You need a wife. Marry Rossa, you got a boat. Mama Mia. Well, what do you say, my son? Goodbye, Papa. Hello, Luigi. Oh, what's the matter? You shaking? I'm in a big trouble, my teacher, Miss Squally. Now calm yourself and tell me what's the matter. Miss Squally, he just to come into my store. She say I must to get the wife to hurry up a quick or a policeman come and take Jimmy away. Is it not the truth, is it, Miss Squally? No, but the authorities do prefer to place orphans with families or unrecognized institution. But you never tell me this when I take Jimmy. Well, I've been reporting regularly to Judge Norton in the juvenile court. He's extremely sympathetic and I... Then if Miss Squally is right, I must to get the married. Well, I wouldn't say must. How else to Jimmy can I have a mother? You must have met girls in your neighborhood. I met, but of course, the money to take a girl out. Once I take out Calata Porrino. She's Antonio Porrino's daughter, you know, the grocery man. We have a dinner in a place, a downtown in a loop. Check, one dollar twenty cents. Well, that's not so bad. But she eat more than me. Who knows what the heart check came to? No, I don't have the money to go look for a wife. I guess I go see Doc. He find me a wife. Who's Doc? He seldom use the cars. I don't understand. He always starts taking some bed on the horses and arranges a marriage. Louisiana Marriage Broker is an old country cousin. In America, a man usually finds his own wife. That's what I think too, Miss Walden. I always think in America, I find a beautiful girl with brown eyes, like a chestnut, with a brown hair like three in autumn. She speak like she born here. She like children. She like antiques too. Old antiques like in my store. And the young antique like me. I learn the good English and I say nicer things. I make love in new language. Sure, it's a very romantic in old language and all the country. But here in America is more romantic. Take a walk on a bigger street with the lights, with lots of people, looking at stores and nicer things. Maybe not even a buy. Just a look is a pleasure. Go for a ride on top of a bus. Everything. Everything you hear is adventure. Maybe girl, don't laugh because I talk with a small accent. Maybe it's because you know that someday I'll be first to class American. Yes, Luigi. There is a girl like that for you. A girl who love you and Jimmy and will want to help you and be a teacher to you both. Don't say no more, Miss Walden. I accept. Luigi, I mean, well, I wasn't referring to myself. Oh, I'm sorry, Miss Walden. I don't mean to embarrass you. It's a test. All right, Luigi. It was a mutual misunderstanding. I'm very fond of both you and Jimmy. But I know no need to explain. I understand. Is it the same with me and Ross? What I mean? All right, Miss Walden. I go see marriage broker doc. I don't find a girl like you, but I find her somebody. I'm sorry, Luigi. That's all right, Miss Walden. If I do this, one thing is sure. Jimmy and all of my other American kids. They're going to find their own wife or own husband and they're going to live for good. Like their papa, Luigi, dream good. And now for the second act of Luigi Vasco's adventures in Chicago. We turn to page two of his letter to his mother in Italy. So you see, Mamma Mia, I got a big problem. If I don't get married, maybe I lose a little Bambino Jimmy O'Connor. But already I love him like my own son. So I decided to take another chance and go see doc, the marriage broker. So soon I will be married to men and I know you will love my wife. Only trouble, I don't know if I will. But anyway, I go and I'm knocking on door of doc, marriage broker politician, and he used the car to say to me, come in, friend, come in. Hello, doc. Well, well, it's Luigi, my fine Italian friend. Happy Columbus Day, Luigi. Happy Columbus Day. But it's not the Columbus Day. It's not, huh? Well, he's a great man, anyhow. A great man, Columbus. If he hadn't discovered America, I might be sitting here in India. Great people, the Indians, but with reservations, of course. Doc, well, excuse me, excuse me. I'm a very, very busy man, a very busy... Hello? Hello, hello, doc speaking. What? You're calling about the ad in today's paper? Yes, yes, yes. It's a 39 Chevy. Is it clean? Why, this car was owned by an elderly school teacher who only drove it between school and her car ride. The dear old lady treated it like it was a baby. You want to see it today? Well, I'll have to check and see if it's ready. Call me back in an hour. Right with you, Luigi. Right with you. I'm a big man. Very busy, very busy. Yeah, very busy. Hello, hello, Pete. Say about that Chevy. Did you fix a glass with the bullet holes yet? Okay, okay, Pete. Fine, goodbye. Doc, I gotta see you back. All right, Luigi. I know just what you came to see me for. You want a good used car. No, doc. I want to get married. Well, I'll get out my catalog. Here we are. What a catalog this is. I have the most beautiful women in the world in this catalog. Like this one. No. How about this one? Oh, no. Luigi, I think there's only one way to solve the whole problem. How? Forget the wife. Buy a car. What's that? I must get married. Must, must. Oh, oh, there's an urgency about it. Well, let's see. I got just a girl. Just got just a girl. Got just happened to have just a girl there. Hello? Mrs. Gotts, please. Oh, this is Mrs. Gotts. Oh, this is Doc. Tell me, how's your husband? What? He's getting better? Oh, that penicillin. I'm Mrs. Gotts. Checking in two weeks. Now I just shows you, can't trust doctors today. But, Doc, what I'm going to do? What I'm going to do? I've got to find a wife quick. Luigi, you're too particular. Now, if I find something for you, I'll get in touch with you. Right now, I haven't got a thing. But, Doc. No, no, somebody's here. I'll get in touch with you later. If anything turns out. Please, the doctor. It's important. I know, I know, Luigi. Hey, wait a minute. No, no, no, no. Not that way. Go out the back. You see, I never like different clients to see each other. Oh, all right, all right. I know, girl, I hope you're married. Goodbye, Doc. Goodbye. Gwally, my fine Italian friend. Happy Columbus Day. Haven't seen you in a long time. What do you want to see me about? My daughter, Rosa. Rosa, Rosa. No, I don't, uh, don't ever remember seeing her around. What is she like? An angel, a little angel. Some man is going to be like a fellow if he's to get a hug. Well, then, what do you need me for? I can't find a lucky fellow. But, Ponce, well, I should think a shrewd businessman like you wouldn't have any trouble getting a husband for his daughter. I'm enough to show shrewd. I waste a lot of time and money on a fellow to knock things that happen. Now, I'm a tired of having my poor little Rosa without a husband. She's such a little darling. Such a sweet angel. Such a, such a, I gotta get rid of that girl. That's what Doc is here for, Pasquale, to lend a, a helping hand at a price. Uh, what price? Shall we say a, uh, $100? I don't a bargain. I give you $100 and a free dinner, Doc. Let's make it 90 and forget about the dinner. It just so happens that a fellow was in here only a minute ago who is dying to get married. That's so wonderful. He's got a money. He's got better than money. Ah, yeah. He's got his own business. Now you just go back to your store and relax and I'll bring him to you like the proverbial fatted cat. No, no, no, please, Doc. He shouldn't have been fat. You know, Rosa's a nice, skinny girl. Well, now you trust me, Fran. Just wait till you meet him. Oh, you're gonna love him. I know to have to wait for everybody to marry my Rosa. I love him already. Hello, Pasquale, my friend. Oh, hello, hello. Hello, Luigi. I decided to make you very happy. You decided to make me happy. See, I'm not gonna make you so happy. You're gonna drop the data when I tell you. Pasquale, I'm gonna marry Rosa. I have a bigger talk with myself and I decide it's a mistake to marry stranger. I marry Rosa and take a chance. You sure you're gonna marry Rosa? Yes. How's the day of you gonna marry Rosa? You wanna talk to me out of it, Papa? Don't call me Papa. I throw you out of my place. But this morning you said to me, Luigi, please marry Rosa. Listen, Luigi, you have your chance so you don't take an American opportunity to say hello only once. You know, open the door, opportunities will go next door. It's all right. I live a next door. Crazy. You think you're the only pebble on the beach, huh? I got other fellow for Rosa. Ha, ha, ha. A business man, rich, has his own business. It doesn't need my money. I still have to put it to promise. I'm gonna get a lawyer and I'm going to... Well, well, here I am, Pasquale. Right on the job. Oh, Luigi. Just the man I'm looking for. Well, hold out at your arms, and Doc, I'm gonna throw him right at you. Oh, Pasquale, I'm surprised at you. This is no way to treat your future son-in-law. Don't tell me how... What do you say, Doc? Well, I mean, Luigi's the man I was telling you about in my office. He needs a wife. You got a daughter. The issue seems clear to me. Has that great philosopher once said, Jelon? And he made a lot of sense. You clean me up, Doc. You tell me you come over and you take me to meet a fellow for Rosa, no? My exact words with a slight inflection. And Luigi, is it a fellow, no? No doubt about it. This is the man. In fact, he saved me the trouble by coming to the store himself. So you see, my job is done. From the looks of things, you two should be very unhappy. But, as the great philosopher once said, unhappiness is cause. There's no doubt about it, my friend. And goodbye, gentlemen. I leave you with two words. Ah, yes. Luigi. Hello, Luigi. I love my son-in-law. Goodbye, Papa. I ain't a minute to Luigi, my friend. I've loosed my temper before. That's all right, Pasquale. You find it again. I'm gonna mean what I say. I get excited. The words are spilling from my mouth like a wine is a spiller from a bottle. Forget it, Pasquale. You forget it, too? Sure. Then do you marry Rosa? I forget that, too. Listen to me, Luigi. That's amazing. If you change your mind, I change mine. That's called fair exchange. No, no. You don't mean it, there's no Luigi. You marry Rosa. She likes you. She likes a gemmy, too. You know, today, just today, she said to me, Papa, I like a gemmy. Rosa, say that. Sure. I'm making him a my grandson. My wife of Teresa, she's making him a grandma. Well, it's pretty nice for a gemmy to have grand-a-paw, grand-a-mama, all in one time. Okay, Pasquale. Okay, here's the deal. Hello, Jimmy. Hello, boss. Say, what were you doing at Doc? You buying a new scar, boss? No, don't be silly, Jimmy. I can't even afford to buy a new one. Boss, you're not. Not what? You're not getting married, are you? Because Doc's a marriage broker. No, Jimmy, I never marry a stranger. Well... I marry Rosa. Rosa? She likes you, Jimmy. But you don't like her. I always like Rosa, Jimmy. You never did before. I began her this morning. Are you sure, boss? Positive. Now we're all happy. I'm not gonna let you do this, Mr. Luigi. You're not gonna let me do this, huh? I'm with the boss, not you. If I marry girl, I marry her because I want to. You got the nothing to do with it. You stay out of my love life. If I say to you I like Rosa, don't argue with me or I'll fire you. But boss, I was only trying to... Never mind it. Jimmy, I know what's the best for you. Hello, Luigi. Hello, Jimmy. Miss Spaulding. This is Judge Norton, Luigi. Judge... Judge Norton from a juvenile court? How do you do, Mr. Bosco? Hello, Jimmy. Hello. I already fixed everything, Judge. Jimmy, would you excuse us for a moment? Yes, ma'am. Listen, Judge, I only find out about the law this morning. And I already make arrangements to marry Rosa as soon as possible. Miss Spaulding, mention her. Do you love Rosa? Does the law say I must love her, Judge? No, but unless there is love, you still haven't provided the proper atmosphere for Jimmy. Then what I do, Judge? What I do? I came out here, Mr. Bosco, because Miss Spaulding told me about your difficulty. I wanted to meet you and see for myself the kind of environment and home you've provided for the boy. In the back is too small a bedroom. No, no, no, no. I don't mean that. Here is a store. All the statues, American presidents, colonial furniture. Jimmy does know it's American history, Judge. I've examined his report cards at school. And Miss Spaulding has given you, Mr. Bosco, an excellent recommendation. Either the same for her, Judge. I still feel that Jimmy should have a mother. But as long as he's a fine student and is happy, I think we can let this matter rest. I won't review this case for another six months. Six months? Thank you, Judge. You thank you. Thank you, Miss Spaulding. Jimmy, Jimmy, he'd be so happy, Judge. Yes, boss? Jimmy, we don't have to get the marriage. Not for six months. Oh, that's great. Please, Judge, do you want a statue? Pick out any one you want. I'll drop in some other time and buy one. You don't have to buy, Judge. I give, will you? Good boss. Shut up, Jimmy. Hey, Louis, see, I'm a sick that of pins and needles waiting for you. I think you stuck, Pascuale. What do you mean? I don't, to marry Rosa. Is that to sell? You don't marry Rosa. Listen to me, Luigi. Twice in one day, you say you marry Rosa, and twice you say no. He's consistent, Mr. Pascuale. Never mind you. You don't marry Rosa, Luigi. I go straight into the police. I go to the judge. You know, one minute, and I tell a him. You tell a minute, one a second. Pascuale, him is a judge in Austin. Him? First time I think is a statue. Good afternoon, a judge. How do you do, Mr. Pascuale? Police, a judge, a neck of him, a marry, Rosa. That's entirely up to Mr. Bosco. I've just told him that he has six months in which to find a mother for Jimmy. So now, Pascuale, I wait the six months. Maybe you wait the six months, but I'd be here first the thing at tomorrow morning. Ladies and gentlemen, be sure to listen to this coming Sunday night when Life with Luigi joins Jack Benny in the great new lineup of programs over CBS. And here Luigi Bosco writes another letter to Mama Bosco describing his adventures in America. Life with Luigi is a Cy Howard production written by Highcraft and Cy Howard and stars J. Carroll-Nich as Luigi Bosco with Alan Reed as Pascuale. Music is directed by Wilbur Hatch. Starting this coming Sunday, the first Sunday of 1949, Jack Benny comes here to CBS with all the people who have helped make his show so famous. Mary Livingston, Rochester, Phil Harris, Dennis Day and Don Wilson. You'll find Jack on CBS with the crazy situations, the absurd minor characters, his violin and his famous Maxwell. So remember, from here on in, it's CBS Sundays at 7, Eastern Standard Time, for the Jack Benny Show. Be sure to tune in the great CBS Sunday Night lineup with Jack Benny, Amos and Andy, Life with Luigi and Armist Brooks over CBS. This is CBS, The Columbia Broadcasting System.