 My name is Jimmy, his name is Jake, and this is the Weekly Dumb Jake. How are you doing? Good to meet you. James, Zach, I was thinking about that the other day. I think when they do the movie, it'll start with us, we'll be in the outfield. It'll be fake, we'll introduce ourselves to each other, and it'll be the dive and catch that I pretend to catch, and you'll just start laughing at me. I'm good, it was Memorial Day weekend. Let's get it afternoon, everybody! Jim, how you doing? Back to you, the sizzler. Ow, got loud in here. I'm good, man, good. You look great. You got a tan, you got a tan. Zach, cut the sound effects. And with that, let's cut it to the sports. Jim, the sports news is big. Jock Fam, boing. Stop the fucking sound, sir. Jock Peterson, we like him, we met him. Kind of an interesting moment. Tommy Fan, known tough guy. They meet up in the outfield and Jim, he got his Will Smith on. This was an elementary school fight. A little bit. No, a lot of it. High school. I mean, you see two kids in the distance and one slaps the other and then you ask him what it's about and they say he traded his cards. Yeah, but it was like trading cards. That's why I opted for an elementary school. But the slap, I think in high school it's a punch. So if anyone doesn't know, they were in a fantasy football league together. A bunch of guys, a bunch of ex-padres, other people. Jock was out for the weekend. He put him on the IR. He picked up a new guy from the waiver wire. Tommy Fam said, that's cheating. You're hoarding players. This is a league for a lot of money. You're hoarding players. Jock said, I looked up the rules. And I looked at his team and he was doing the same thing. Had the receipts of Tommy doing the same thing. After Jock tells the media that, Tommy Fam gets his time in front of the media and he says, well, it was more than that. The league's for a lot of money. And also he disrespected the Padres. Now Jock has all of the Padres fans like, what did he say to be so disrespectful to deserve a slap? So after the game, Jock says, I sent a meme of three weight lifters. It's a gift meme. It's a gift meme of three weight lifters, Dodgers, Giants, Padres and the Padres one. You guys are probably familiar with the three dragons meme where there's two tough dragons and a silly goofy dragon. It was basically that, but in video gift form. Because the Padres collapsed and the Giants and Dodgers didn't. I mean, it's a classic joke. It's a joke. I mean, Tommy Fam isn't all, Tommy Fam's been stabbed. Fact. Yes, yeah. Jim, you were telling me about this. One of your top 10 famous pieces of art that you're not sure why they're so famous, something happened to it. The Mona Lisa got caked. Now, Jake, I don't know. This is almost a breakdown. A 30-something year old man dressed as an old woman in a wheelchair. In there. And then smeared cake on the glass in front of the Mona Lisa. And then he yelled, afterwards he publicly yelled, this is to bring awareness to the earth. I want people to know about the earth. Some of my questions. There was a lot of people real close to the Mona Lisa and none of them were in a wheelchair dressed like an old lady. I was like, is there just a wheelchair front row section? Honor system. He could have just been himself. Well, maybe he dressed as an old woman because he wanted to get away and be in disguise. No, he made a great grand plea to let, if he did that, no one would know why the Mona Lisa got caked. So I don't know why the disguise. I think the disguise is just to be a little less suspect as you approach. It was a bad costume. You see a 30-year-old guy approaching the Mona Lisa and you're like, he might take this. You see an old lady in a wheelchair and it never crosses your mind until it happens. I want Jake. Do we have cake here? I want cake you. Before we go to the next segment. He did that for earth. For earth, yeah. Jim, I feel seen in this row back polo. You're wearing a row back right now too. I love a row back actually. It's like my favorite shirt. I wore one yesterday too. I love dogs. I love being comfortable row back. Can we take it to more sports please? Please. Whoa. Go. Hey. Hey, hey, hey. Our Rangers. We've been lifelong bandwagon rangers fans. I was actually a Hartford-Wailers fan. Their team was stolen from me as a child and that's when I became a bandwagon rangers fan and the Rangers got their revenge. They beat the tropical storms. They can't. They can't. They can't be beat at home. They beat them. We're hockey guys. Go. Yeah, interesting strategy by the Rangers. Rely on your goalie because he's really good. Inger, a good player on the other team with a clean hit or an accidental skating into it. That's what a strategy is that the Rangers have. And the Hurricanes had to lose because their coach is the most evil looking coach in all sports. Rod Brindemore. Yeah. NBA finals are set. Your golden state's back at it. Celtics. Ruin warriors. I am too. I've been able to keep track of my papers this whole show. This is something that's always been close to you. There won't be any jokes this segment because this not sports last Salem witch pardoned 329 years after she was wrongly convicted. I'm a little angry about this story. You should be. Why are we just pardoning witches? Yeah. Thank you. What's the new evidence that they're not a witch? Lawmakers. Lawmakers. Law people of the law. Legally pardoned Elizabeth Johnson Jr. last week, EJJ. She was convicted in 1693, sentenced to death, but they didn't kill her. It just feels like a flaw in the system. But they didn't pardon her. They're just like, we've moved on. And then some eighth graders. Now. Yeah. Why don't we pardon her? And then lawmakers pardon her. What's the evidence? This is tough because what are we doing? We're using lawmakers times to pardon witches from 300 years ago. We're teaching eighth graders that they're thinking they're doing something when they've done nothing. If anything, we've just taught these eighth graders that nothing matters. A group of eight graders. Eight graders. Eight eighth graders. Comes up to you and says, Mrs. Smith, we know you're a lawyer. We'd like, we want this witch to be pardoned. It's a good eighth grader impression. And then Mrs. Smith has to turn to them and say, there's better use of your time. Zach, I've got good news for you. You love witches, dark arts, et cetera. You haven't gotten to use blood in a while. Sorry, dreamy's mom. Two, three, four, Employee of the Week. There's frogs, Jose Trevino. Who's the employee of the week? At least it's my three top candidates. Who did? Did anyone do anything good? Have you even went to Kevin yet? Oh, he roughed Beano. And he headbutted me when I was in goal against the baseball players yesterday and he made himself bleed. Why do you headbutt you? Just excited. He was a good Beano rough. Weird guy. I like him. In a good way. Yeah. In a good way. Employee of the Months Act. Congrats to Kev, social media team, Employee of the Week. That was the Weekly Dumb. This episode of the Weekly Dumb was brought to you by Roback. They are performance polos, quarter zips, hoodies. I am enjoying mine very much. That's an honest assessment of my time wearing the Roback. Polo's incredibly comfortable, breathable. I'm out on cotton. I'm in on Roback. So do yourself a favor and use the code DUM on roback.com for a generous 20% off your first order. That's spelled R-H-O-B-A-C-K dot com. 20% off your first order on all polos, Q-zips, hoodies, and T's with code DUM just in time for the summer. Someone just threw a bag of Taco Bell in the street. That could be a piss to you. I didn't do it. You, it seemed like you didn't. No, I didn't. The Taco Bell was pretty specific. But right now it just happened. You just did that. No, every five minutes someone throws Taco Bell outside their car window. Fake fact. In the state of North Dakota. Nah, not enough Taco Bells. Not, you're really enough Taco Bells. How many Taco Bells in North Dakota? Honest guess, 20. I don't think there's a lot of Taco Bells in North Dakota. Airplane mode. Arrow wear airplane mode. Mm. Double airplane mode. We'll have to Google that. Only time you nut is when you Google my ass.