 Lux presents Hollywood. Radio Theatre brings you Rosalyn Russell and Jack Carson in roughly speaking. Ladies and gentlemen, your guest producer, Mr. Irving Pitchell. Greetings from Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen. Tonight's Lux Radio Theatre play is, briefly, a saga of America. It is the frank, exciting biography of a real woman who, throughout two marriages and roughly two generations, experiences the true nature of American freedom, the opportunities for failure as well as success, the right to live by individuality and courage. In our cast are two players admirably fitted for their roles, not only because of their innate talents, but because they too have experienced the ups and downs of life. And while they landed very much on top, their natural sympathy and good humor have made them two of Hollywood's most popular stars, Rosalyn Russell and Jack Carson, appearing in their original screen roles in Warner Brothers, roughly speaking. In planning for tonight's show, I talked at some length with Louise Randall Pearson, who wrote the original story of our play. She's now starting a career as a Warner Brothers writer, proving, as she says, that life begins at 50. I asked her, what if she had her life to do over again? And she assured me only one thing might make her hesitate. The dishes that she had to wash day after day, year after year, for a family of seven. If at the start of her tumultuous career she had seen all those dishes piled colossally in front of her, she might have thrown in the sponge. Fortunately, she, like other smart and thrifty housewives, laid in a supply of lux flakes and went on about each day's dishes singing. In fact, says the resourceful Louise, lux flakes were standard equipment in the Pearson home in all of its many permutations. Here's the curtain for tonight's play on the first act of roughly speaking, starring Rosalyn Russell as Louise and Jack Carson as Harold with George Nice as Rodney. It may be a little unusual to begin a story with a boy and a girl singing the Yale Bulldog song, but it's a good way to introduce a young lady named Louise Randall, who on this brisk winter's night in 1911 is taking a sleigh ride with Mr. Rodney Crane. On hilltop overlooking the university, Louise and Rodney continue their baying at the bright December moon. Bulldogs, bulldogs, bow, wow, wow, our team will never fail. When the sons of Eli break through the line, that is the time we fail. Bulldogs, bulldogs, bow, wow, wow, our team will never fail. Well, do you think I can make the Yale Glee Club? Oh, there's no doubt about it. Uh, should we stop for a while, Louise? Let's do. Oh, oh, Louise, how did I ever come by the marvelous good luck to find you in New Haven? Because Shelby and company needed a reliable secretary. Oh, seriously, Louise? Seriously? Because when my father died, we woke up one morning and found we didn't have any money. So I went to work. I guess I shouldn't have mentioned it. Nonsense. Oh, look, here's the big dipper. The big dipper? When I was a little girl, my father used to say if I was good, the big dipper would pour down hot chocolate covered with whipped cream. I still expect it to even with... Oh. I, I kissed you, Louise. Yes, you did. I want to apologize. I kissed you without your permission. If that's all that's troubling... I, I want to take you out of all this. All this what? I want to give you a home, a real home with me coming home from the bank on the 515. You bustling around the kitchen... And if you get home before I do, you bustling around the kitchen. You get home? From where? From work, of course. Rodney, do you know they pay secretaries $25 a week in New York? Oh, I'd never permit my wife to work. Ah, funky doodle. Why, with your brains and my get up and get, we'll make a wonderful tea. But I want to be able to give you things, a house and a maid. I'm graduating June and the bank's going to start me off at $66.66 a month. Why, in two years... In two years you'll be making thousands. You'll mark my words. Well, that's why I say, if we only wait... Why should we wait if we love each other? The minute you graduate, let's whiz right down to the town clerk and be married. But it, it just isn't done like that, Louise. Oh, prunes and prisons. You do love me. Oh, yes. It's just that I feel so, so... What? Unambitious. And you will wait for me, won't you, darling? Only until you get the $66.66. Oh, let's have it perfect. Let's get a little apartment, all on our own. Even if it's tiny. Just the two of us against the world. All right. Oh, I won't say obey, and I won't say why. But, Louise. But me, no buts. And we're going to file health certificates. Why? Because I want all my children to be perfect. I'm going to have nine. Nine? Now, wait a minute. Oh, Rodney, I feel so darned. In June we were married and we went to New York. Our little flat had a fine view of the 3rd Avenue L. And I loved it the minute I saw it. It was so bohemian. One night, about a year later, Rodney was in the front room reading the paper of Rodney. Huh? Oh, plenty. Yes, sir. Plenty. Do you know what I did this afternoon? I'm going to put Woodrow Wilson in the White House. You mark my words. Just listen to this. I bought a new record for the phonograph. But this is important. Why, if Wilson's elected, our whole nation is... Louise, do you have to play that record now? No. I'm pretty sure you'll like it. I hope you will, Rodney. All right, darling. I wish someone would tell that theodore Roosevelt to... Louise! Yes, dear. That record. Oh, darling. Aren't you happy? Happy. Well, I'm the happiest man in the world. Louise! Here, darling, sit down. How do you feel? Oh, for goodness' sake, why didn't you tell me? Woodrow Wilson was elected president. And in January, Rodney and I awaited the arrival of the little boy, who someday also would be president. Except he turned out to be a girl. One night when Barbara was about a year old, I thought it would be nice to have a musical evening. I got out our old record in 1915, when we moved into the country in 1918, to Riverwood, a wonderful old house overlooking the Hudson. Here, I said, here is where we will settle down. In we moved with Mother's old furniture and Rod's misgivings. Rod, he was sure it would bust the budget. The morning of our third day, I went upstairs to get little Louise. She still wasn't out of bed. But I didn't. Darling, your brothers and Barbara are outside playing, and just look at you. I want to stay in bed, and watch the squirrel. What squirrel, darling? Right out there, on the window sill. Oh, you wouldn't want to sit in the sun and help Mother shell peas? Look, Mommy, there he is. All right, sweetheart. I'll bring your breakfast up here. Louise, does anything hurt you, dear? Just my ankles. My Johnny's ankle hurt. What did you say, dear? My ankles. Johnny's ankle hurt, and Barbara's wrist and body too. They told me. Sweetheart, if you got up right now and walked to the window, I'd give you a nickel. I tried before, but I can't. Stay here, darling. I'll be back in a few minutes. I just want to make a phone call. First complaint, Mrs. Graham. This morning, Doctor. But she seemed all right. As a matter of fact, they all had to. Where are the others? Outside playing. You'd better get them in the house. Doctor, what's wrong with Louise? I'm not sure as yet. Forgive me, Doctor Lewis. But I think you are sure. I'd like to look at the other children, please. Yes, of course. Who's the best specialist in New York on infant alfalfa? Infant. His name is Dr. Bowditch, Mrs. Graham. I think you can reach him now at Children's Hospital. Well, Dr. Bowditch. Where is your husband? Dr. Lewis sent him to the drugstore. Well, it can be worse, Mrs. Graham. Much worse. The youngest would better remain in that room by herself. The others. It's all right if they're together. The others? They have it too? Yes. We'll need another nurse. Of course. There are a few things I can assure you. John and Barbara and Rodney will get off lightly. Slight redness of the throat but no paralysis is yet evident. I'm starting them on serum. Louise? At present, she has only the use of her left arm. Pognosis for life? Well, it's fair. Life? But she doesn't even seem sick. She's very sick. You can't breathe when paralysis reaches your lungs. Doctor, may I speak to you, please? Oh, what is it? Is there anything wrong? Please, Mrs. Graham, what is it, nurse? If you don't mind, I wish you'd talk out loud. You'd better stay here, nurse. Whispering is so depressing. I don't think you realize how serious this is, Mrs. Graham. I don't feel equal to being sad. What did you call Dr. Bowditch for? He wanted to give the serum. You must get hold of yourself. Yes, darling? Darling? Cat pistol. Your child is very ill, Mrs. Graham. I won't take the responsibility. You don't have to. I will. Louise, Louise, what is it? What's going on? Rodney, would you mind getting the cat pistol? It's in the 4th of July, things in the cellar. What on earth do you want? Louise wants it, please, Rodney. Darling, she's very sick. I don't believe you really understand. I understand everything. She'll live. She has to live. Oh, yes, but... I know, I know. She'll be lame. Lame? How do you know she'll ever walk again? Because I'll make her. Louise, I don't see how you can take it like this. It's almost heartless. Heartless? Simply because I refuse to crucify Louise by allowing this thing to consume the proportions of a great sorrow. Well, how are you going to help it? By not crying over it, by not sentimentalizing it. Her illnesses will be just a darn nuisance, that's all, for Louise, I mean. Rodney, she wants the cat pistol. Oh, I'll get it. Sweetheart, here's your cat pistol. But the squirrel's gone away. He's gone to bed. Louise, look there. Look out the window. The squirrel's gone to bed. But you can see the big dipper. Uh-huh. And if you're a good girl, it'll pour down hot chocolate covered with whipped cream. And there's the great bear and the dog star. Such a long way off. I bet if I try hard enough, I can hit them. Watch me, Mommy. Oh, I'm sure you can hit them. I'm sure you can. Long after midnight, if I lay awake, I could hear her laughing and shooting. Shooting, shooting. Aiming for the star. In the summertime, little Louise was playing once again with her brothers and sisters. There was a brace on her leg that she used to crutch. But she was alive and well. The week after we paid the last doctor bill, Rod came home early one day. For the sake, Louise, how can you laugh? I said I lost my job. Don't ever frighten me like that again. I thought the world had come to an end or you'd murdered somebody. Maybe it strikes you as funny. It doesn't strike me as funny. But what do you care? You did a good job? Why not try something different? And why don't I get that job I'm always talking about? And we can start all over again. Great, Scott. You'd think a man could get a little sympathy when he's just lost his swell job he's worked his heart out over. But no, no. Just throw ten years' banking experience into the ash can and try something else. Darling, don't worry. All the banks are cutting down. There's a recession in case you're interested. You'd been better off if you'd never met me. I admit I wanted you to get ahead, but love has nothing to do with prosperity. You really cared you'd be crying. I never cried, unless I'm sure I'll be able to stop. New England. There she stands. There is no substitute for granite. You know, I believe if I died you'd regard it as just another way to develop your character. Oh, darling, don't say a thing like that. Just because I'm determined, I can't help that. You remember about Grandfather Randall? He tried three times before he reached the summit of Mont Blanc. Finally, when he did, while he was overtaken on the way down by an avalanche, but by George, he made it. Oh, well, I guess I can get another job. Oh, come on, darling. Let's go find a kid. Weeks, dear, but I wish you well. Well, it's over, Louise. I start next Monday. Rodney. Manhattan Trust. $5,000 a year. $5,000? Why? Well, we'll be able to afford the country club and send the children to camp and... What's the matter, darling? You have the job. I haven't. I couldn't tell you this. Tell me what... Is it a girl? Is she pretty? Yes. No. Oh, I don't know it. It isn't that. Maybe it's an infatuation. Maybe it won't last. Oh, no, that would be easy. You want to marry her? Yes. But I did everything I could. That's just it. You did everything. A man doesn't want to be done, for he wants to be loved. But I do love you. You are my life. Your life? I was just something on a list. Something that didn't get attended to. Oh, it's also hope. But I don't understand you and you don't understand me. We never have. Oh, wonderful adventure. The train going nowhere. I'm sorry, Louise, but there hasn't been a day in the last ten years. I know, I know. Let's not go over everything and cry and scream. Let's not destroy the past. You know it's funny. I thought when Johnny goes to Yale and runs the length of the field for a touchdown, I thought you and I would be there together. Johnny will be disappointed. It's no use, Louise. I'm through. Living with you and the kid, well, it's been like living with Carrie Nation in the den of Lyre. I know sometime, I suppose. I'm getting a divorce. What's a divorce? Where is it? I want to see it. It's a paper that says your father and I aren't, uh, that he, uh... Well, your father's going to marry another woman, a young woman. You can't be married to two ladies. Anyone knows that. Well, he isn't going to be married to me anymore. I think that's mean. We mustn't judge people, darling. You don't know. Nobody knows. He doesn't even know that when she's 33, that she'll be just as old as only as you are? Turn on that ignition, Johnny. We're getting out of here. Hey, where are we going? I wish I knew, kids. I wish I knew. Carson will bring you an act of roughly speaking in a moment. What Hollywood celebrity have you been seeing today, Libby? Milo Anderson, top designer for Warner Brothers, who did the clothes for Rhapsody in Blue. He got so excited about the picture, he designed a special fabric and named it for the Gershwin Rhapsody. Are there lots of beautiful clothes in the picture? Oh, yeah. Alexis Smith has some stunning outfit she's supposed to have bought for the press. And Joan Leslie has over 20 costume changes. Although that's not as many as Robert Alder has who plays the part of George Gershwin. How do you account for mans having more? Could it be because the story of Gershwin's life covers two decades? Joan doesn't appear until he's a young man. Well, maybe smart women need fewer things because they know how to keep them lovely longer with luxe care. It's ever so easy to keep colors fresh-looking with luxe. The studios know that, too. Sometimes a scene that is supposed to take place may take days or even weeks to shoot, yet accessories have to stay fresh-looking. So they're just whisked through lukewarm luxe suds. Afterwards, no one can tell the difference because they stay so new-looking with luxe care. Lalo Anderson does some perfectly breathtaking clothes. And yet ever so many are as wearable as they're wonderful. He's practical. There's one very practical rule the wardrobe departments of Hollywood follow. With millions of dollars invested in costumes, they do as millions of women in their own homes do. They trust a gentle luxe. Luxe care keeps things so lovely and new-looking so much longer it actually pays in dollars and cents. They know that anything safe in water is safe in luxe. If your dealer is out of luxe right now, try again soon. More is on the way. Luxe is so thrifty it's worth waiting for. Here's our guest producer, Irving Pitchell. Our curtain rises on the second act of roughly speaking, starring Rosalind Russell as Louise and Jack Carson as Harold. Sometimes wonder how my life would have turned out if a year later I hadn't gone to the country club. It was a math grade party. During the evening I saw someone sitting by the swimming pool. He wore evening clothes and all over his high silk hats were lighted candles. Mr. Pearson. I don't know you do, aren't you? No. You were pointed out. Won't they let you in there with those candles? I don't know. I haven't tried. I'm a Christmas tree. Get it? All lit up? We ever in jail? Not yet. Quite. Well, once when I was in the guardhouse during the war I read a volume of tennis. How was it? Fine. I shall take some savage woman. She shall rear my dusky race. Oh. Is that tennis in your pocket? No, just the racing form. Why should you remind me of tennis? Maybe I just remind you of the guardhouse. Come here. Sit down. I'm in my misery. Oh. The masterful type. Well, I got everything. Brains, money, personality. Then just what is your trouble? I forgot to grow up. At least that's what my father says. Oh, the man who owns those big greenhouses near Briarcliffe? Yes. And what's your trouble? Nothing. Except I wanted to set the world on fire. And I never amounted to a rope. Hey. Your hat. Your hat's on fire. Huh? You're on fire. Sure? A positive. Your hat's on. Pardon me a second. You're on fire out? I think so. Now give me a hand. I can't pull you out. Come on, try. You see, I can't. Okay. If you can't pull me out, I'll have to pull you in. Hey! You can hang those wet clothes by the oven. Tell me, Mr. Pearson, do you always keep extra clothes at the country club? You look very striking in my golf knickers. What's in the ice box? Bologna. You got any bread? Next to the stove there. Sometime, do you think I could visit your father's greenhouse? Well, I don't get down there very often. I thought you said you were Vice President. I just draw the salary. Got any pickles? Ah. You're taking the stove for pickles. But for two hours you've been telling me how ambitious you are. Oh, sure. But ambition's very tricky. You gotta watch it or you'll end up with lines in your face and no hair. Sandwich? Thank you. Well, I know what I'd do. I'd quit sponging off my father and I'd build my own greenhouse. That's nice dreaming, but where will I get $125,000? I've never saved a dime. My father used to say you could do anything if you have brains and tried hard enough. Oh, I forgot the mustaches. Sit down, sit down. You're the bossiest man I ever met. It's about time somebody took your hand. You're not suggesting by any chance that... You're positively clairvoyant. You're also beautiful. Well, I know you don't believe me. I'm serious. Don't be ridiculous. Well, I feel... okay. I think I'll be going. Oh, don't go. I mean, for a minute, it's... it's fun talking with someone. It's been so, um... Lonson? I've never talked like this in my life. It's about time you did. I guess it's because I've been sort of cooped up. Marry me and see the world. I will marry again. Oh. How bad is that? No, no. It wasn't bad at all. It's me. I'm dreadful. Well, I am. I'm ambitious even if I do get lines in my face and no hair. And I do everything for everybody even when they don't want it done. What are you talking about? Not only that, I'm granite. You what? Wasn't that pretty silly? I'm not silly. Not take it back. Two grown-up people acting like this. Go ahead. Go ahead and say it. I will not. No, I won't say it. Come on. All right. You're not silly. Now we're getting somewhere. The business is picking up, I see. I don't want to seem curious, Louise, but where did you dig up the wild cats? Erase yourself. They come with me as standard equipment. Ready-made family, huh? Well, Mr. Harold Pearson, it's been very nice knowing you. Oh. That kid could make a fortune easily. You run along up to bed, children. That's it. Now there's nothing to worry about. Good night now. All right. Maybe you can see why I'm ambitious. If you married me, you wouldn't be struggling alone. I'd be in there swinging with you. I need somebody to push me. Who could say, as you did, quit sponging off your father and get a place of your own? I tried once before to make a man into something he didn't want to be. But look at the material you've got here. Always modest and retired. Say, listen, I'll be just as many as my friends sire for me marrying you with those four kids. It'll be your sire for you. You're sure you don't mind the kids? What are you talking about? I love them. They're part of you. And my gray hairs? I think they're wonderful. Don't you see, it's a new life. You and I together. How can we fail? I will knock this cock-eyed world for a loop. Yeah. Harold and I were married and we trusted gang way for the millennium. Did Harold want $125,000 for a green house? Okay, just sign on the dotted line. In the year Frankie was born, the green houses actually were built. And by December 1928, we paid off all we owed the bank. All but a... As far as your eyes can see, roses under glass, the biggest crop we've ever had and every bud perfect. Every time I look at them, I think they're good. They're ours. Or they will be after we pay off a little matter of knowledge. And nothing to start with but a good strong shoestring. Ah, the frenzied financiers. It... Well, don't look at me. The deal was your brainstorm. Oh, I still don't understand how you ever pulled it off. Because I was willing to gamble and I happened to be lucky, that's all. First, let's take Frankie. Oh, by the way, where are the children? Can't you hear them? I've just been in town buying them baseball mitts. Now, about Frankie, I wanted a boy in Preston. Excuse me. Hi, Frankie! Hi, Papa. See what I mean? I see what you mean. And don't tell me I'm spoiling our kids. I... No, no. It's just the sun got in my eyes. Oh, darling, this is just too good to be true. I see what you mean. How could a big, carefree guy like me load himself down with a wife, five kids, and a flock of debts? Yeah, it must be nuts. Why did you do it? Why? I don't know. Unless it's because I'm reasonably fond of you. Now, what time is it? 10 after 11. Oh, holy smoke! Listen, it may not matter to you that your two oldest boys get home from school today, but they're my oldest boys, too, and I'm going to the station to meet them. Oh, and if you think just because it's Christmas vacation that I'm not going to put them to work around here, you are loony. So, you know what? It might be nice if we had a little party Christmas Eve after we got all the roses shipped off. Just us and the greenhouse men, Tony and the rest, a little wine and some Christmas carols maybe. I think they kind of liked that. Oh, it's the best Christmas I've ever known. Money for the bang. Yeah, and funny leftover. Yeah, let's. Hey, break up that ball game, you kids. We're gonna meet the boy. Well, boys, we've been thinking to Mrs. and I. I got a little more money in your pay envelope. And you use it? Jack, how's the market? What else you can do? Okay, Jake, so how about it lasted? Harold? All week long, roses have been pouring in from out west. The market's flooded. Then on top of that came our 30,000. Jake says we busted the market. Too many roses? That's right. We get about 50 cents for the first 5,000. A quarter for the next. Jake said about 10,000 will have to be dumped. Boys, I think the king of Mabel would go home. Good night, Tony. Good night to me, sir. Merry Christmas. Yes, thank you. Thank you. Same to you. What have you got in your eyes this time? Nothing. I'm just plain balling. From rags to riches and ten easy lessons. Just to fix it, that's it. I got you into this mess. You were all right until I got old, have you? Who's kicking? And now, if I'm not saying anything, the Christmas tree is still standing over there and the presents are still piled up around it. Sure. Who says there ain't a Santa Claus? Well, what are we waiting for? Hey, kids? Yeah. Come on. Come on, let's open up the presents. And our rose-covered future. Four months later, we were in Bridgeport. Our hopes pinned to the tail of a new tangled aeroplane. Harold had a friend and the friend had the plane. But he needed a thousand dollars to get it in the air, so we all took jobs. Even Johnny and Rodney and Barbara, we got the thousand dollars. We got that plane in the air and we got the Wall Street backers. A million dollars to start manufacturing. We were up in the clouds again, one thousand revolutions per second. If you're interested in having a custom CD produced for you of many old-time radio shows available, then visit vintagebroadcast.com. The year was 1929 and the month was October and Destiny had a date with high finance which nobody had told us about. Wall Street panic. Bottom drops out of stock market. It's not ration history. Financial disaster threatens nations. Canadians right now to stumble first on Wall Street. Give this country back to the Indians. If they're as smart as I think they are, they won't take it. Well, it says all the aspects of an undesirable situation. What new approach do you suggest? What's the matter with us for heaven's sake? We have brains, ambition, background. We work like dogs. Maybe Native Americans are extinct and don't know it. Maybe they ought to put us out on a reservation like the bison. I'm sorry I drive you and the kids into this thing. I was so sure I could make a go of it. You still love us? The five hostages in the ball and chain? That's why I feel so darned in. Isn't there an easier way to make a living than being kicked in the teeth for it? Sometimes I think if Plymouth Rock had landed on the pilgrims, a lot of trouble would have been saved. Say, how about moving to New York? The place as big as that, I certainly ought to be able to get some kind of a job. New Vistas. Bright horizons. Fresh stars. Oh heck, why not? Hey kids, how would you like to live in New York? Prosperity is just around the corner. Brother, can you spare a dime? Of course there were bright spots. Like when John graduated from Yale and got a scholarship in medicine. When Rodney rode in the freshman race against Harvard, and Barbara married a man as solid and dependable as the Rock of Gibraltar. So in 1937, the only members of our little band of Wildcats left with us were Louise and Frankie. Yes, Mother. Find anything? A steam-fitter and a neat-appearing colored man with a bicycle. I can see the trouble with me is I didn't specialize. And they're still advertising for men to sell those vacuum cleaners like Pa's doing. I know that ad by heart. Mr. X, former clergyman, made $174.82 last week. What's that clergyman got that Pa hasn't got? Pa says he's got God on his side. Oh well, let's sit down. What's for dinner, Ma? Guess. Onion sandwiches. No matter how thin you slice them, they're still onions. Well, it's a relief after all that split peas soup we've been having. Come on, you suppose we'll ever turn on the lights and gas again. All we need is faith, Frankie, and the money to pay the bill. Pa will sell one of those vacuum cleaners soon. You just wait and see. I can't bear the thought of your father lugging that thing miles and miles and people slamming doors in his face. Don't even talk about it. Knock, knock. Who's there? Whoa. Whoa, who? For heaven's sakes, if I didn't sell a vacuum today. Mr. X has nothing on me. Our worm is turned, honey. You poor thing. I didn't think you'd sell one of those things in a million years. Oh, no. Well, look. My first commission. I don't say I'm not a good provider. You're wonderful. Absolutely wonderful. Man, what are we having for dinner tonight? Don't tell me. Don't tell me it's right on the tip of my nose. Onion sandwiches. Well, eat them in a week, family, for the last time. You said it. Wait till you see what I cook for you tomorrow night after I've bought my new double boiler. Why? Boiled onions. Room near where we live. And the next day as I returned home with my double boiler, I happened to glance inside. There amid the unfamiliar scene was a very familiar scene. I don't complain, fellas. Just watch. Watch and you'll see how it's done. Are you ready? Ah, here we go. Another game or are you broke? Ah, 86 bucks. I'm through. And far from me. You're too good. Oh, now, boy. Here, I'll give you the rest tomorrow. I'm busted. Well, so long, boys. I'm gonna have a beer. If you're lonesome, just call me. Tell me your vacuum, Tina. Oh, uh, I expect him any minute. Would you care for a beer? Certainly. I, uh, like your office. It'll do for a start. These, uh, gentlemen? All customers? Um, prospective. How's business? Picking up. I just chalked up a swell deal in there. Hmm. Much of a future in it. Yeah, Tina. I think I'll knock out the wall there and put in a bigger barn over there. I'll put in a few more booze and when things really get going. Harold. I just couldn't sell those darn vacuum cleaners. This was the best thing I knew to do. Go on, ball me out. I don't blame you. Huh. Me, the big shot. You don't have to sell me the idea of being president instead of vice president. I'm the kind of a guy that likes to start at the top. Well, you just do the best you can and when nothing happens while you... just do the best you can. If you had any sense, you'd leave me. You know perfectly well I haven't got any sense. You're hopeless. Isn't that bad? No, it isn't bad. This letter came to you today when I was leaving. Harold, could I get drunk on beer? Great Caesar's ghost. What's the matter? What is it? I don't believe it. What is it, silly? Just say I'm not silly. You're not silly. I'll say I'm not silly. I've got a date with a guy regarding the super-duper job I've been gunning for for weeks. Only superintendent planning at the New York World's fair. No. Yes. And overall, that money you just won. Come on, come on. What's the idea? If you've got to have a job at the World's Fair, you're certainly going to have some decent clothes. That's right. There's enough here for a shirt, some shoes, a tie. What you really need is a new suit. Yeah, a new suit. Hey, sit tight, baby. I'll be back in a few minutes. Hey, Eddie. Sam, call me in on the next game. Hey, where's the queue and give me that chalk? I'm hot. We pause now for station identification. This is CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting System. Return in Act 3 of, roughly speaking, here's our producer, Irvin Pitchell, to introduce the guest of tonight's performance, one of Warner Brothers' bright young actresses, Angela Green. She's blonde, she's Irish, and very ambitious. What kind of roles do you want to play, Angela? I'd love to do something really dramatic into Pitchell by Joan Crawford, you know, her kids. That's the picture that Jack Carson, who you're playing tonight, has co-starred in along with Zachary Scott. I have a small part in the picture, and I watched Joan every chance I could get so I could learn. It's her first picture in three years because she insisted on waiting for the right story and the right role, and in this she's more wonderful than ever. You've picked an excellent model. She always looks so glamorous, too, no matter what she wears. And in Melted Peer, she wears the most wonderful, wearable clothes you ever saw. You sound like something of an authority on clothes yourself. Well, I used to model for photographs back in New York, but wearing lovely clothes in front of a camera wasn't enough. I've always wanted to be an actress, a really good one. Did your modeling experience help you? In acting a little. In being thrifty a lot. When you're a model, you're expected to look beautifully groomed every minute of the day. Lux was a wonderful help in keeping stockings, undies, and glosses new-looking longer, so I could afford dramatic lessons on the side. And in saving my pennies with Lux and studying dramatics in Hollywood, I'll be ready for bigger roles. And I'm sure they'll come. Thank you, and good luck, Angela. Lovely women all over the country depend on Lux for exquisite grooming. It keeps pretty colors and fabrics new-looking longer. Actual washing tests prove Lux care keeps undies color fresh three times as long. Slips in 90s washed in strong soaps, hot water, and handled roughly soon looked faded and old. Yet identical undies washed the same number of times with Lux. Still look lovely. Lux is thrifty care for all washables. We take you back to Irving Pitchell and our stars. We hope you'll be with us after the show when our two stars come back for their curtain call. Here's Act 3 of Roughly Speaking starring Rosalind Russell as Louise and Jack Carson as Harold. Gold got the job, superintendent of planting at the New York World's Fair. We moved to Long Island, rented a house near the fair and the vacant lot next door. Louise per crippled foot and all went into business with me. We parked cars. A particular parking lot for the particular people, people who don't particularly care what happens to their car. We dent your offenders, scratch your bumper, solve your problems right this way, so you know a good thing when you see it right this way. We'll be back in about two hours. Yes, sir. 35 cents, please. And be sure you stop in at the chemistry exhibit. Hear my son Frankie, lecture on plastics at the age of 17. Never mind that. Just be sure to turn the motor off. Women parking cars. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Hey, Louise, any more room? A coupé on the left. That's it. Careful of your fender there. I need clothes. Two o'clock in the morning. It's a great racket. Follow your nose. Thank you, sir. Don't forget. Don't ask me how we're going to get them all out. Oh, look like a doctor to me. Oh, that's because I haven't got my little black bag. And Rodney, a new suit and everything. You look pretty snazzy. Oh, you look pretty nice yourself. Hey, but what's with this parking racket? I thought you were in the money. Well, Frankie has his heart set on Harvard. I thought we might as well make pay while the sun shines. Harvard? What's the matter with Yale? Well, not as the boys are here. I might as well tell you more. Guess who's at the house? Barbara. Barbara? When did she get you? Oh, we just thought we'd drop in for dinner. But your father's at work. And Frankie? Oh, it's all fixed. They'll be here any minute. For heaven's sake. For heaven's sake? Huh? I just remembered. It's my birthday. A fancy French restaurant at the fair. Well, how about your glasses? I bought a speech mug. Oh, come on. Come on. Oh, well, I'm overcome. I've eaten so much and I've laughed so much. But once I'm speechless. This, I gotta see. Well, may I put in a few words, please? You will anyway, yes. Go right ahead. Well, when I first met Mrs. Pearson, I had some soft, smooth hands. But after one application of the tow per boot to the seat of my pants. Well, you carry on, Frankie. I can't make a speech without champagne. It's all right, Harold. Give him some. Special occasion. Well, all right. Here. Oh, that's only half a glass, Pa. Well, make half a speech. Well, seriously, Ma, this is the first champagne I've ever had. Oh, you're kidding. I just want to say, Ma, that I think you're swell and I love you. Oh, Frankie. That's very nice. That's a nice speech. Thank you. That's a lovely speech, Frankie. And now the birthday cake. Here it is, everybody. Oh, God. Oh, it's beautiful. And only 50 candles, Louise. Let this be a lesson to me. Well, children, for a woman of 90, your mother is certainly marvelously preserved. Harold. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Don't worry, ma, nothing's happened yet. Every time I get my ship on an even keel, something goes bang. It was a couple of years in coming, but when it did, something certainly went bang. And they were both in it, of course, John and Rodney. Just before they left for overseas, we had a few minutes to see them off the station. Harold and... There he is. Johnny! Hey, Johnny! Oh, darling, we've been looking all over for you. Hello, ma. You look very handsome. Oh, it's a brass button. Hi, Captain. Admiral, oh, oh. Can't seem to get this cap right. Yeah, well, maybe if you tip a little bit of a sign, ma. Hi, ma. Here's Rod. Johnny! Hi, you schizics and Rod. Great item, miss. Let me look at you, darling. How are you? Oh, fine, swell. Hey, where's Louie? On the night shift at the plant. And of course, you know about Barbara and the baby. If I had only known this in time, I would have made some fudger, knit a sweater or something. Well, Rod, if they give you any choice, try to get into the tank core. Like I said in the last war, why walk the Berlin when you're going to ride? But you shoot them, Rod, wheel, sink them. Yes, sir. And Frankie here with his chemistry hill, Blom Sky High. No, no, no. Frankie's got a lot of work yet to do at Harvard. That's me, I guess. I had a million things to say to you. I can't seem to think of any of them. Are you sure you're going to be warm enough, darling? Oh, sure. Well, goodbye, soldier. Goodbye, Pa. Don't do anything I do. So long, Rod. Goodbye, darling. So long, Rod. Take care of yourself. Thanks. And you too, Sceezie. Sure, Rod. Sure. And don't worry. All right. Goodbye. Oh, I guess that means me. Sean, so soon? I thought you did. Oh, I've stayed over two trains already, dear. They get annoyed if you hold up the fleet. Where are you going? Where will he see you? He can't tell you where he's going, honey. He doesn't know himself. Give him a love to Barb when you see her, and Louise. Tell her to keep the stuff coming. Sure, Johnny. You bet we will. You know, Pa. Rod and I never got around to telling you. I mean, how swell you've been. Like when we smashed up your car, and I pretty near got thrown out of school. You never said a word. I guess we were pretty often. And the way you put up with Mother, too. I like that. Now, see you here, young man. Lieutenant Crane, if you please. You kids were never much trouble. It was your mother. If I hadn't had a will of fire. Well, goodbye. All of you. And Ma, let there be no moaning at the bar. When I put out to sea, Lord Tennyson. Alfred, Lord Tennyson. And that shows you how much Yale has it over Harvard. Goodbye, Ma. Goodbye, Johnny. Bye, Pa. Goodbye, Johnny. Keep an eye on her while we're away. And don't let her get any brighter ideas for winning this war. I won't. Just you be careful now. And don't take the destroyer in deep water. I won't. Goodbye. Goodbye, Frankie. Bye. Bye. I'd like to sit down for a minute, then we can call. Here's a place, Ma. Harold, didn't you think John looks thin? No, no. I thought he looks just about right. Ma, I've been waiting to tell you this all day. There's practically nobody left in college, so I'd like you to sign this piece of paper for me. Let me see a dick. Harold, permission to enlist in it. Now look here, Frankie. Wait a second, Louise. After all, we're all entitled to make our own decision. Harold, the boy is too young. How can you say? I'm not right of we. You and I to interfere. I've built in some of the things to make it easier for you, Ma. Do I have to sign it now, this minute? Might as well sign it now. It won't be any easier later on. You know, Frank, I tried to get in myself, but they wouldn't have me. Yeah? Too old. It's tough, Ma. But then things have changed since your work. Listen, young man, how long do you think it took us to get a vicar's gun at the action at Vimy Ridge, huh? Here, it's signed. 11 seconds. Oh. Gee, thanks, Ma. You know what? I'm going to try for the paratroopers. Good grief. Oh, don't worry. They wash them out so fast. You get to be a lieutenant in no time. Well, I'll see you later. Oh, where are you going? Recruiting office before it closes. I'll see you home. Frankie! I guess that's that. Come on, honey, let's go. I don't know what's the matter with me. I was bound I wouldn't do this here I am. We did fine. Don't worry. They're all chips off of the old block. Nothing's ever going to lick them. Poverty or sorrow or Germans or Japs. I wanted them to have such a wonderful life. And it seems as if that every time. I think everything that counts. Suppose they did get it the hard way. I mean, what if they'd had everything handed to them in a silver platter the way you wanted? How do you know how they would have turned out? And they had you always as an example in front of them, mocking your head against a stone wall and turning up grinning. They may be down, but they'll never be out. I can't help wishing we'd stayed in one place more than five minutes so they'd have had a home to remember. You know, to think about while they're gone. Well, honey, home is where you were. Home is a feeling, Louise, not a place. Still, they ought to have something solid, something secure to come back to. I think maybe it farms the answer. Back to the land. Maybe we could get a little place somewhere, you know, sort of 50 acres and develop it gradually. 50 acres? If you're going to have cattle, you've got to have at least 200 acres. Who said anything about cattle? I was thinking of turkeys. Who are you on turkeys? Now you've got cattle and a flock of sheep. Well, now, of course, if we had a garden and some chickens, maybe the place could be self-supporting. Self-supporting? Nothing. I just read the other day about a guy who started out with nothing at all, but cattle and sheep, but at no time at all. I lost his shirt. All right, all right. I know. You were just dreaming. I can't shoot you for dreaming. Not in this country at any rate. That's right. America's the one place you're free to make a million, lose a million, drunk or sober. I thought you were the one who wanted to give it back to the Indians. Oh, no. Not as long as I still have my strength and my help. Say, honey, what would you think of our initials for a brand? You know, an H and an L? Harold, you don't brand turkeys. Louise and Harold. Everybody knows that. I know. What? Who's talking about turkeys? Well, turkeys, you only get one shot Thanksgiving. Uh-uh. Two Thanksgiving. All right, all right. But you eat beef the year round. The place I heard about was over in Pennsylvania. Maybe this weekend we could drive out over there. See what I'm talking about? The guards will be back for their curtain calls in just a minute. Now, when it comes to clothes, there's one item the end of the war brings to most women's minds. Nylons. That's right, Sally. Nylon stockings are expected to be back in the stores in two months or so. I wish it were sooner. Well, most stores don't want to put nylons on sale until they have enough to go around. Few stores that have sold small quantities recently had to call out the police to keep order. But I know one lucky lady who won't have to wait. This is V.G. Linky of New York has eight pairs of nylons. And she bought them in August 1941. That's over four years ago. Yes, but they've had Luxe care all that time. And you know how Luxe helps stockings wear. Here's what Mrs. Linky says. I still have eight good pairs of nylons that were bought in August 1941. I've just lived in them. In fact, I've worn nothing else. Isn't that a wonderful record? I give a lot of credit to Luxe. My nylons are Luxe after every wearing in lukewarm sud. Believe me, when nylons come back again, I'll stick to Luxe. It certainly helps keep runs away. And scientific strain tests back up, Mrs. Linky's remarkable record. These tests showed stockings washed with Luxe lasted twice as long. That was true of nylon, rayon, cotton, and silk. Stockings washed with strong soap or rubbed with a cake of soap soon popped into runs. But the Luxe ones stayed lovely twice as long. For nylons, as well as rayons, use Luxe flakes. Mr. Irving Pitchell returns to the microphone. A curtain call is no new experience for troopers like Rosalind Russell and Jack Carson. And here they are, back at the footlights to receive our thanks. You made inspiring parents, both of you. Thank you, Irving. Maybe having children of our own helped. Your youngster must be growing up now, Rosalind. Have you taught him how to talk? Oh, yeah. Well, now you'll have to teach him how to keep still. That's right, Jack. How are you bringing it, bringing up children, Jack? Oh, great. Great, Irving. I use psychology. Psychology? Yes. If I want them to go to sleep, for instance, all I have to do is, well, just whisper in their ear. That I'd like to see. What do you whisper? Go to sleep or I'll land the daylights out of you. I don't believe it. What's your formula, Rosalind? Well, I usually sing my youngster to sleep. Oh, I do that, too. Well, you sing, Jack? Do I sing? When I first came out to Hollywood, all the studios were after me to sing. And what happened? They were after me. Somehow I can't imagine you singing a lullaby, Jack. Well, I do, Rosalind. I've got a lovely Russian lullaby. Russian lullaby? Sure. Rock-a-bye babeski in the tree top of itch. When the babreski the cradle will drop a bit. In just a minute, Jack, that's plenty. Before our audience drops off to sleep, I want to be sure to tell them what we have for next week. Yes, what do you have, Irving? The play that I have a great personal interest in because I directed it for Paramount. It's John Steinbeck's story, A Medal for Benny. Oh, that was a great picture, Irving. And I hope you've got the original screen cast. They did a wonderful job in the picture. Yes, we have all three principles. Dorothy Lamour, Arturo de Cordova, and J. Carol Nash. That set up writes a medal for Petul, Irving. Good night. Good night, Irving. Good night. Thanks for a great evening. Our sponsors, the makers of Lux Flakes, joins me in inviting you to be with us again next Monday evening when the Lux Radio Theatre presents Dorothy Lamour, Arturo de Cordova, and J. Carol Nash in A Medal for Benny. This is Irving Petul saying good night to you from Hollywood. The victory is won abroad. We have another victory to win at home. The transition from wartime economy to a happy peacetime living. That's the purpose of the National War Fund. In addition to providing essential services to our men and allies overseas, more than half of every dollar you contribute will be spent in your community to determine the standard of living that surrounds you. In these critical post-war years, the National War Fund is an overall agency designed to keep alive the American way of life. Give generously. Give gratefully to your community war fund. Rosalind Russell will next be seen in the Columbia picture. Some call it love. Jack Carson is regularly heard on this network in his own program for Campbell Soup. The most of us, motion pictures, are a popular form of entertainment. But to the sick and wounded veterans in our hospitals, they are also medicine, a primary factor in building morale. Thousands of films contributed to the Red Cross by the Hollywood Motion Picture Studios have helped brighten the hours and speed the recovery of convalescent veterans from coast to coast. Another way in which a great industry is serving America. This program is broadcast to our men and women overseas through cooperation with the Armed Forces Radio Service. Our music is directed by Louis Silvers. And this is your announcer, John Milton Kennedy, reminding you to tune in again next Monday night to hear a meddle for Benny with Dorothy Lamour, Arturo de Cordova, and J. Carol Nash.