 The Kraft Foods Company presents Willard Waterman as the Great Gilded Sleeves. The Great Gilded Sleeves is brought to you partially transcribed by the Kraft Foods Company. Seeing's believing and tasting's believing. So try Kraft's wonderful new parquet margarine tomorrow. See for yourself that new parquet spreads smoothly even when ice cold. See how neatly it spreads on the freshest slice of bread. And taste how good and appetizing it is. New parquet has a flavor that millions say is tops. Your grocer has Kraft's new parquet margarine in the new blue package. You'll love the way it tastes. You'll love the way it spreads. As city water commissioner, the Great Gilded Sleeve is a fairly important person in Summerfield. But he has never been invited to participate in any of Mayor Terwilliger's social activities. Consequently, it was quite a plumb when the mayor asked him to play golf at the country club. Right, George Gilded Sleeve, you really scored. Isn't everybody who gets invited to play golf with the boss? Yeah, where are my clubs? Must be here in the garage somewhere. Hi, Al. Hello, Leroy. What are you doing clearing out the garage? Yeah, I'm looking for something. A car? No, my golf clubs. Your old uncle has been paid a great honor. Yeah? His honor Mayor Terwilliger is invited the water commissioner to his country club. What's the matter? They got a leaky pipe? Oh, watch it, young man. Yeah, let's see now. No kidding, monkey. You're really going to play golf with the mayor? Yep. I want to meet him on the first tee at one o'clock. I may just be in for a promotion, my boy. Oh, you dreamer. Well, the facts speak for themselves. He didn't ask any of the other commissioner to play golf with him. Why would he ask me? Because he knows he can beat you. Oh, Leroy. Of course, I haven't played in a couple of years, but I... Oh, here, here are my clubs. I think I'll go out in the yard and take a few practice swings with my trusty old nine-iron. I'm caddying for you. Well, that's an idea. Bring my golf bag out in the eyes. This old club feels good. They don't make them like this anymore. Genuine hickory shafts. What's the curve in it for, hitting around trees? Leroy, it isn't that bad. Drop a ball here on the grass. Okay. I'll chip it up to the base of the tree. Yep. Yep. Went off to the right. Yeah, the ash can. Drop another ball, my boy. Sure. Have to concentrate a little more. Eek. Zeek. Off to the left this time. Unk. Yes, Leroy. You don't need a caddy. You need a bird dog. Yes, yes. Drop another ball. Okay. I'll straighten this one out. Eggman. Hey, there's Mr. Cooley. Leroy, I'm concentrating. Eggman. Oh, Cooley, I'm about to hit a golf ball. You on of that? Hello, Leroy. Hi. Cooley, move. You're standing right in front of me. From the way you hit the other two, this is the safest place. Hello, Mr. Gildersleeve. Hello for hello and kindly move. Hey, Aunt, you're going to lose all the golf balls. Why don't you swing it a leaf or something? Why not swing it one of my eggs? You put it down there and you'll be minus an egg. I'll take that chance. Leroy, why don't you run and round up the ball? Okay. And you, Mr. Cooley? Yes, sir. I have a very important golf date with the mayor this afternoon. I'm trying to sharpen up my game. Now, if you'll excuse me. Oh, certainly, sir. Now, slow backswing. I'll never be able to understand why so many people play golf. That's because you don't understand the game. Now, quiet, please. You must keep an eye on the ball. All you do is hit the ball as far as you can and then go look for it. Yes, yes. And when you find it, you hit it again. Cooley, you talked on my backswing. Sorry, sir. Now, eye on the ball. Slow backswing. That's another thing about golf. You can't even carry on a conversation. Oh, what's the use? I'm going to hit it anyway. As far as I can. Ah-ah, you missed it. I know that. You lifted your head. Found it. This time, I'll knock it out of the state. Broke my club. Ah-ah, you shouldn't lose your temper. So on and so hard, I've got a crick in my neck. Ouch! Hey, Uncle, I can only find one ball. Leroy, there's one down in this hole he just dug. Cooley. Why is your head cocked to one side, Uncle? You're listening to something? Leroy, I've got a crick in my neck. I can't turn my head around straight. Then how are you going to see the ball? He might hit it if he can't see it. Don't worry. I'll see it. The doctor can take care of my neck in a jiffy. Leroy, there's no use playing golf with a crick in my neck when they can get it out in no time here at the clinic. The clinic is swell. Door buzzers and everything. Yes. I've never been here before. Where is everybody? Some of them will be out. Let's sit down with the magazine. Wait. Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah. Oh, boy, 1949 popular mechanics. I bet this is worth money. Here comes a nurse. Cute, too. There's nothing wrong with your neck. Leroy. Well, good morning. I'm Miss Hatfield. May I help you? Yes, indeed. I'm Throckmorton V. Gillesleve, city water commissioner, and this is my nephew, Leroy. How do you do? Hi. Who's the patient? I am. Well, step right over here, please. Have you been to this clinic before, Mr. Gillesleve? No. I'm a pretty healthy specimen. Oh. Uh, excuse me. Are you listening to something? No, I just have a slight crick in my neck. Oh, I see. Well, let's just fill out this little form. Look at all those questions. Uh, nurse. Yes? I doubt if all that red tape is necessary. Just show me a doctor and I'll show him my neck and get out of here. I'm afraid it isn't quite that easy. Oh? Before you're admitted to the clinic, we have to have certain information. Well... Mr. Throckmorton V. Gillesleve, correct? Yes, that's right. Marital status? None. I mean no. That is... Single? Uh, yes. Occupation? Water commissioner. Yes, indeed. Up to my neck and water for 11 years now. Employed by? The mayor. And come to think of it, I'm due with... Employed by City of Summerfield. Uh, nurse, can I see the doctor now? Oh, we've scarcely begun to fill this out. But all I have is a crick in the neck. Shouldn't take the doctor five minutes. The doctor isn't in yet. He isn't? No, he's making house calls. Hey, maybe it'd be quicker to go home and call him to the house. I think I'd better forget the whole thing. Oh, here's Dr. Culpepper. Good morning, doctor. Good morning, good morning. Good morning, doctor. Hi. Well, young man, what's wrong with you? Me? Fall out of a tree. Get hit by a football. Stub your toes. Stick out your tongue. Should I? Yes, doctor. I'm the patient. Oh, yes. Should've known. I'm Throckmorton P. Gillersleeve, and I just stopped in for a second. Fine, fine. Doctor, there are other patients waiting in the examining rooms. Fine, fine. Nurse, take this man's medical history, and I'll see him later. But, doctor... Hey, you keep cocking your head. Are you listening to something? No, I have a crick in my neck. Fine, fine. Hmm-hmm. And now, Mr. Gillersleeve, let's get back to our questionnaire. Who referred you to us? Nobody. I stuck out my own neck. Getting late. I should've left with Leroy. Here comes that nurse again. What a busy place. Nurse? All right, Mr. Gillersleeve. I don't like to complain. But I've been here an hour, and I still haven't seen the doctor. Oh, I'm sorry about all the interruptions, but we have other patients, too, you know. Yes, but I'm not exactly a patient now. My neck feels better all the time. Oh, now, now, Mr. Gillersleeve. Yeah, I have a very important golf game in half an hour. You're trying to alibi. What? Yes, you're just like a lot of people. You come in here and get cold feet before you even see the doctor. Now, let's get on with your medical history. No, dear. Childhood diseases? Is that important? I don't have them anymore. Excuse me. It might be important to the doctor. Best of now, childhood diseases? Oh, well, let's see. Chicken pox. Chicken pox. Anything else? Well, once I ate too many green apples. Oh, you naughty boy. Huh? Let's not tell the doctor about that one. It'll be our little secret. Oh, my goodness. And now, let's see. We've taken your blood pressure, your pulse. Now, let's take your temperature. My temperature? Open your mouth. Your over-oom? There. I want them ready. Keep your mouth closed. I'm not taking the temperature of the room, you know. Oh, good morning, Mrs. Potter. Good morning, Mrs. Hatfield. Well, you're early this morning. Well, right after breakfast, I started worrying about myself. Now, now, the doctor told you not to worry. Oh, but I want to. Oh, excuse me, that's the doctor. Why don't you sit down there by Mr. Gildesley? Thank you, honey. She's so nice. Mm-hmm. What are you in for? Mm-hmm. Mumps? Mm-hmm. Shall I throw? Oh. Well, I put on my glasses and take a look at you. Oh, okay. There. Oh, my stars, you know you'll have a thermometer in your mouth. Mm-hmm. Did you think I was never coming back, Mr. Gildesley? Mm-hmm. I'll take the thermometer now. Good. Any temperature, nurse? Temperature? Am I normal? Well. I mean, is it down or up, maybe? This information is for the doctor, Mr. Gildesley. Oh, my goodness. If she won't tell you, I'll take your temperature. What? Let me put my hand on your forehead, sonny. Sonny. I'll wait for the doctor if you don't mind. Oh, you won't find out much from him. Oh? I've been coming here for years. He never will admit there's something wrong with me. But he can't fool me. Why, Mrs. Potter, you're as healthy as a horse. Well, if I am, it's because I see my doctor regularly. You do? Every day. Say, are you listening to something? I'm looking and listening for the doctor. Mr. Gildesley has a pain in the neck. You bet. Excuse me, Dr. Kulfepper buzzing again. Oh, what a busy doctor. He'll never get around to me. Now, sonny, you do as I do. Just sit here until he does get around to you. But, madam. Can amuse ourselves. I have a cribbage board right here in my shopping bag. When I can't get some neighbor to play, I come down here. But for deal. Please, I can't play cribbage with you. I have a golf game at one o'clock. Say, it's almost that now. You can't play golf, sonny. You're well enough. Yes, I am. Oh, no, you're not. If you were, you wouldn't be in the clinic. Well, by George, I'm leaving. I have an important date with the mayor. Do you know the mayor? He's my boss, that's all. Oh, you're a politician. Well... No wonder you're in the clinic after all that campaigning. I don't campaign. I'm appointed. If I want to be appointed again, I have to get out of that golf course. Where's my hat? I won't let you go. Madam, let go of my coat. I will not. You're a rash young man. Please. If you won't think about your health, somebody else has to. Sit down, sonny. No, madam, watch it. Sit down. Nurse, doctor. No, no, you're delirious. Well, what's going on out here? Well, thank goodness you're here, doctor. Mr. Gildersleeve was about to leave. Oh, yes, Gildersleeve. I am a little anxious to get out of here, doctor. Getting more anxious all the time. Well, let's take a look at your chart. That chart the nurse filled out is hardly necessary, doctor. I feel fine. Let's see. Mm-hmm. Oh? What's the matter, doctor? Mm-hmm. Uh-oh. Mm-hmm. Doctor? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Why is he shaking his head? Sit down, sonny. I guess I'd better. Great Gildersleeve will be back in just a moment. Do you hesitate to try new foods? Don't let a thing like that keep you from discovering Kraft's wonderful new parquet. Here's a margarine that's different, deliciously and dramatically different from any table spread you've ever served before. Wouldn't you like a spread that needs no warm-up when you take it out of your refrigerator? A spread that can be served instantly? Then new parquet is for you. New parquet spreads smoothly even when ice cold. It won't tear the freshest slice of bread. Won't crumple thin crackers. New parquet melts quickly, too, in your frying pan. And yet it won't turn soft and run all over the plate if you leave it standing out in a warm kitchen. All this is possible because Kraft has perfected a new way of making margarine. This new method gives you what you've always wanted in a table spread. A texture that's exactly right, whether it's hot or cold. Kraft's new discovery also improves the flavor of parquet. Serve it as a table spread, as a seasoning on hot vegetables. Use it as a shortening in your baking. Parquet's fresh, wholesome taste means good eating always. Get Kraft's new parquet tomorrow in the Ice Blue Package. The picture of a cake of ice in the corner will remind you that parquet is the margarine that spreads smoothly even when ice cold. Well, the great gilded sleeve was elated when the mayor asked him to play golf. He got his clubs, went out into the yard to take a few practice swings, and got a crick in his neck. He thought it would be a simple matter to have the crick removed before his golf date at one o'clock, but it's after one now, and the water commission is still at the doctor's office. Yeah, I'll try calling the mayor once more. He's probably wondering what's happened to me. Uh, Lyon's busy again. I can see Maritwell again now, fuming and pacing up and down the first tee like a Bantam rooster. Well, did you get your call through, Mr. Gilded Sleeve? No, Lyon's still busy. Now, as you know, I'm in a hurry. Why did you take that little Mrs. Potter in ahead of me? Isn't she a doll? Well... The doctor only takes a minute with her, and he might want to spend a little time with you. Oh? What makes you think so? Well, the doctor's a very thorough man, and you say you haven't seen a doctor in quite a long time, Mr. Gilded Sleeve. No, but, uh, nurse, you know what you wrote on my chart. What are some of the things you put down? Well, I can't tell you. Professional ethics. Oh, come on. I'm sorry. Oh, my goodness. I've got a good notion not to even wait to find out what's wrong with me. Nurse? Yes, doctor? Oh, there you are, doctor. Nurse, phone the pharmacy and have them deliver my order right away. I'm so busy, I won't be able to go by for it. Yes, doctor, right away. Just a minute, doctor. Oh, do you wish to see me? Fine, fine. Do I wish to see you? I've been waiting quite a while. Oh, fine, fine. Let me look at you. What's your name? Gilded Sleeve. Fine, fine. Say, you look a little flushed. I should, I'm boiling. I've been here for hours and there's not much wrong with me. Fine, fine. How do you know? How do I know? Well, I... You just keep your shirt on until I tell you to take it off. Take my shirt off? I wonder if he's discovered something wrong with me already. He said I was flushed. No, nothing wrong with me. Nurse, oh, nurse. Yes, what is it now, Mr. Gilded Sleeve? I'm leaving. You are? There's nothing wrong with me. Nothing more than is wrong with that little Mrs. Potter. Nurse, nurse. Oh, he found something wrong with me. He found something. He did, Mrs. Potter. He did, he did, and I'm so happy. You're happy about it? Oh, I'm beside myself. Mr. Gilded Sleeve, the good doctor told me I have a vitamin A deficiency. Aren't you fortunate? Oh, yes. Vitamin A is the first vitamin in the alphabet you know. Oh, brother. And I have to take pills? And Mr. Gilded Sleeve, I have a good feeling about you. You do? I just know the doctor will find something wrong with you, too. I can't wait. Bye, Mrs. Hatfield. Goodbye, Mrs. Potter. Bye, Mr. Gilded Sleeve. Goodbye. Turn around. Now, Mr. Gilded Sleeve, do you want to go back to the examining room? I'm not so sure. They just moved me back here to wait. Nearly two o'clock. A fine golf date. I'd sneak out of here if I knew where they put my tie and shirt. People are pretty silly in this white jacket with bows in back. Yeah, that must be the doctor now. I'll peek out the door. If he passes me again, I'll drag him in by his stethoscope. Why, why is Peavey? Oh, hello, Mr. Gilded Sleeve. Peavey, what are you doing here? I'm delivering some drugs to Dr. Colpepper. What are you doing here? Well, the mayor asked me to play golf with him. Oh, you're looking for the ball way over here? Peavey, I'm waiting to see the doctor. I didn't think you'd be playing golf in your night shirt. It's not mine. It's the doctor's. Then why are you wearing? Yes, yes. Peavey, I've been tied up here all day. I'm sorry, Mr. Gilded Sleeve. What seems to be the trouble? Not a thing. Nothing wrong with me. Well, then why are you here? I'm here for an examination. Well, why are you having an examination? To see what's wrong with me. How's that? Peavey, I came in here with a simple crick in my neck. The nurse took my blood pressure, my temperature and all that stuff. You don't change. Then the doctor took a look at my chart and started shaking his head. What do you think that means, Peavey? Maybe he's got a crick in his neck, too. I don't mind admitting I'm a little concerned about myself. Well, I wouldn't worry too much, Mr. Gilded Sleeve. You wouldn't? Dr. Culpepper is one of the best diagnosticians in the state. Well, that's good news. He locates your trouble. Peavey, don't you start worrying me. Say, there's Dr. Culpepper coming down the hall again. Peavey, see if you can stop him for me. Yeah, well, Dr. Culpepper. Well, Mr. Peavey, what's the matter with you? Me. Say, let's have a look at you. You haven't been feeling up to par, eh? Say, ah. Oh, fiddle sticks, I don't want to say ah. What? I just came here to deliver your order from the pharmacy. Oh, fine, fine. Yes, doctor, I'm the patient. Remember me? Because I'm a little older than when I first came in here. Yeah, fine, fine. We're going to take care of you, Gilded Sleeve. There he goes again. He's breaking the postponing to bad news, isn't he? Now, Peavey, just because he hasn't told me anything yet doesn't mean I'm desperately ill. Well, no. I shouldn't worry because he seemed to trifle concerned over my chart. No. So the chances are the doctor will tell me, Gilded Sleeve, you're the finest physical specimen I've ever seen. No, no, no, I wouldn't say that. The mayor and I could have played nine holes of golf by this time. Oh, Mr. Gilded Sleeve, you have a visitor. It couldn't be the doctor, could it? He'll be with you any minute now. Go right in, young man. Hi, Alex. Leroy. I thought I'd better come down and tell you the mayor's been calling. Boy, is he hot because you stood him up. Right now I'm more concerned about my health than I am about the mayor and his old golf game. Yeah? They're going to operate? Leroy, don't jump to conclusions. Well, Jack, it's already slid up the back. That's the way they make them. What's wrong with you, Aunt? They won't tell me. That bad? At least they haven't told me yet. Do I look all right to you, my boy? Yeah, I guess so. Leroy, you're telling the truth, aren't you? Yeah, I guess so. Now, Gilda Sleave, we're ready for you. Uh-oh. Well, I see you're back, young man. Yeah, and there's nothing wrong with me. Fine, fine. Let's take a look at your chart again, Gilda Sleave. Well, whatever you say. You're the doctor. Blood pressure all right, temperature fine, pulse fine, fine. Everything seems to be fine. You doze? Great, Aunt. And the nurse handed you my chart. You shook your head and did a lot of muttering. Oh, that. Well, confidentially, Gilda Sleave, my nurse is a terrible typist. Oh, sir, that was it. Gilda Sleave, why did you come to see me in the first place? I had a slight crick in my neck. Crick in your neck? Let me see about that. You do have a muscle spasm back there? I do. Well, good thing I stayed here today, I guess. What do you prescribe, Doctor? Why don't you bone up those muscles, Gilda Sleave? Why don't you go out and play a little golf? Oh! Gilda Sleave will be with us again in just 30 seconds. You'll never know how smooth spreading and good tasting a margarine can be until you try Kraft's new parquet. New parquet spreads smoothly even when ice cold. Spread smoothly on the freshest bread or thinnest crackers. No tearing, no crumbling, no trouble, even when served ice cold from your refrigerator. Tomorrow when you're shopping, get Kraft's wonderful new parquet margarine in the new ice blue package. Parquet looks wonderful, tastes wonderful, and spreads smoothly even when ice cold. I did leave early. Didn't even get out for lunch. Let's see what's in the refrigerator. I'm starved. Oop, nothing but water. Yeah, this is the day to defrost. Well, I have to eat something. I'll never be able to wait until dinner. Eggman! Hey, here's Mr. Cooley. You can get some eggs. I don't want to see Mr. Cooley. He's the cause of all my troubles. Yeah? Yeah, well, let him in. Front door's locked, and I'll lock the back door. Don't let him know we're here. Why not? Leroy, that Eggman kept talking while I was practicing my golf swing in the backyard. He made me break my club, get a crick in my neck, miss my game with the mayor, and spend the whole day in the clinic. Yeah, in a way, I guess he did. Yeah. Well, I don't hear him anymore. I guess he's gone away. Yeah, that'll teach him. I never did like the way he just walks in the house. Eggman. Oop! Cooley, how did you get in the house? Through the basement. The basement? I crawled through the coal chute. Hello, Leroy. Hi! But why do you go to such trouble to get in? I wanted to see you. Hello, Mr. Gilder Sleeve. Hello. I told Mrs. Cooley I was afraid I took your crick in the neck a little too lightly. Oh, well, that's all right. You weren't the only one. I told her I caused you to break your golf club and even go to the doctor. Oh, well. And Mrs. Cooley suggested I make amends by bringing you one of our best turkeys, all roasted and everything. A whole turkey for me? Great! I'll eat it now. Where is it? I had a better suggestion. Oh? Here's a new golf club. It... Leroy locked the coal chute. Great Gilder Sleeve is played by Willard Waterman. The show is written by John Elliott and Andy White and is partially transcribed. Included in the cast are Walter Tetley, Bud Stephan, Elizabeth Patterson, Paula Winslow, Norman Field and Dick LeGrand. Musical composition by Jack Meakin. This is John Easton saying good night for the Kraft Foods Company, makers of the famous line of Kraft quality food products. Be sure to listen in next Wednesday and every Wednesday for the further adventures of the Great Gilder Sleeve. There are two kinds of delicious Kraft prepared mustard. Mild Kraft mustard, so smooth and delicately spiced. And Kraft mustard with snappy horseradish added. And whichever you prefer, remember, when you add a little mustard, you add a lot of tang. Try it on cold sandwiches, hamburgers, frankfurters and cold cuts. Enjoy the wonderful sauces you can make for hot meat and vegetable courses with Kraft prepared mustard. Keep both kinds on hand and keep the whole family happy. Get Mild Kraft mustard and Kraft mustard with snappy horseradish added at your favorite food store. Tonight Play You Bet Your Life on NBC.