 Section III It is strange how every relation in life assumes a different face as soon as a new person enters. We spent marvellous days together. We visited the mountains and lakes, we read together, and I completed Wanda's portrait. And how we loved one another, how beautiful her smiling face was. Then a friend of hers arrived, a divorced woman, somewhat older, more experienced, and less scrupulous than Wanda. Her influence is already making itself felt in every direction. Wanda wrinkles her brows and displays a certain impatience with me. Has she ceased loving me? For almost a fortnight, this unbearable retrain has lain upon us. Her friend lives with her, and we are never alone. A circle of men surrounds the young women. With my seriousness and melancholy, I am playing an absurd role as a lover. Wanda treats me like a stranger. Today, while out walking, she stayed behind with me. I saw that this was done intentionally, and I rejoiced. But what did she tell me? My friend doesn't understand how I can love you. She doesn't think you either handsome or particularly attractive otherwise. She is telling me, from morning till night, about the glamour of the frivolous life in the capital, hinting at the advantages to which I could lay claim, the large parties which I would find there, and the distinguished and handsome admirers which I would attract. But what use is all this, since it happens that I love you? For a moment I lost my breath. Then I said, I have no wish to stand in the way of your happiness. Wanda, do not consider me. Then I raised my hat and let her go ahead. She looked at me surprised, but did not answer a syllable. When by chance I happened she be close to her on the way back, she secretly pressed my hand. Her glance was so radiant, so full of promised happiness, that in a moment all the torments of these days were forgotten, and all the wounds healed. I now am aware again of how much I love her. My friend has complained about you, said Wanda today. Perhaps she feels that I despise her. But why do you despise her, you foolish young man? exclaimed Wanda, pulling my ears with both hands. Because she is a hypocrite, I said, I respect only a woman who is actually virtuous, or who openly lives for pleasure's sake. Like me, for instance, replied Wanda justingly, but you see, child, a woman can only do that in the rarest cases. She can neither be as gaily sensual, nor as spiritually free as a man. Her state is always a mixture of the sensual and spiritual. Her heart desires to enchant a man permanently, while she herself is ever subject to the desire for change. Her result is a conflict, and thus, usually against her wishes, lies and deception enter into her actions and personality, and corrupt her character. Certainly that's true, I said. The transcendental character with which woman wants to stamp love leads her to deception. But the world likewise demands it, Wanda interrupted. Look at this woman. She has a husband and a lover in Lemberg, and has found a new admirer here. She deceives all three, and yet is honored by all and respected by the world. I don't care, I exclaimed, but she is to leave you alone. She treats you like an article of commerce. Why not? The beautiful woman interrupted vivaciously. Every woman has the instinct or desire to draw advantage out of her attractions, and much is to be said for giving oneself without love or pleasure, because if you do it in cold blood you can reprofit to best advantage. Wanda, what are you saying? Why not, she said, and take note of what I am about to say to you. Never feel secure with the woman you love, for there are more dangers in women's nature than you imagine. Women are neither as good as their admirers and defenders maintain, nor as bad as their enemies make them out to be. Women's character is characterlessness. The best woman will momentarily go down into the mire, and the worst unexpectedly rise to the deeds of greatness and goodness, and puts to shame those that despise her. No woman is so good or so bad, but that any moment she is capable of the most diabolical as well as of the most divine, of the filthiest as well as of the purest thoughts, emotions and actions. In spite of all the advances of civilization, woman has remained, as she came, out of the land of nature. She has the nature of a savage who is faithful or faceless, magnanimous or cruel. According to the impulse that dominates at the moment. Throughout history it has always been a serious deep culture which has produced moral character. Man, even when he is selfish or evil, always follows principles. Women never follow anything but impulses. Don't ever forget that and never feel secure with the woman you love. Her friend has left. At last an evening alone with her again. It seems as if Wanda has saved up all the love which had been kept from her for this superlative evening. Never had she been so kind, so near, so full of tenderness. What happened is to cling to her lips and to die away in her arms. In a state of relaxation and holy mine. Her head rests against my breast and with drunken rapture our eyes seek each other. I cannot yet believe, comprehend, that this woman is mine, holy mine. She is right on one point, Wanda began, without moving, without opening her eyes, as if she were asleep. Who? She remained silent. Your friend? She nodded. Yes, she is right. You are not a man. You are a dreamer, a charming cavalier, and you certainly would be a priceless slave. But I cannot imagine you as a husband. I was frightened. What is the matter? You are trembling? I tremble at the thought of how easily I might lose you, I replied. Are you made less happy now, because of this? She replied. Does it rub you of any of your joys that I have belonged to another before I did to you, that others after you will possess me? And would you enjoy less if another were made happy simultaneously with you? Wanda! You see, she continued, that would be your way out. You won't ever lose me then. I care deeply for you, and intellectually we are harmonious, and I should like to live with you always, if, in addition to you, I might have... What an idea! I cried. You fill me with a sort of horror. Do you love me any less? On the contrary. Wanda raised herself on her left arm. I believe, she said, that to hold a man permanently, it is vitally important not to be faithful to him. What honest woman has ever been as devotedly loved as a heterah. There is a painful stimulus in the unfaithfulness of a beloved woman. It is the highest kind of ecstasy. For you too? Wanda asked quickly. For me too. And if I should give you that pleasure, Wanda exclaimed mockingly, I shall suffer terrible agonies, but I shall adore you the more. I replied, but you would never deceive me. You would have the demonic greatness of saying to me, I shall love no one but you, but I shall make happy whoever pleases me. Wanda shook her head. I don't like deception. I'm honest. But what man exists who can support the burden of truth? Were I say to you, this serene, central life, this paganism is my ideal? Would you be strong enough to bear it? Certainly I should endure anything so as not to lose you. I feel how little I really mean to you. What sovereign? But it is so, I said, and just for that reason. For that reason you would, she smiled roguishly. Have I guessed it? Be your slave, I exclaimed. Be your unrestricted property, without a will of my own, of which you could dispose as you wished, and which would therefore never be a burden to you. While you drink life at its fullest, while surrounded by luxury, you enjoy the serene happiness and Olympian love. I want to be your servant, put on, and take off your shoes. You really aren't so far from wrong, replied Wanda. For only as my slave could you endure my loving others. Furthermore, the freedom of enjoyment of the ancient world is unthinkable without slavery. It must give one a feeling of like unto a god, to see a man kneel before one and tremble. I want a slave. Do you hear, sovereign? Am I not your slave? Then listen, Jimmy, said Wanda excitedly, seizing my hand. I want to be yours, as long as I love you. A month? Perhaps, even two. And then, then you become my slave. And you? I? What you ask? I am a goddess, and sometimes I descend from my Olympian heights to you, softly, very softly and secretly. But what does it all mean, said Wanda, resting her head in both hands with her gaze lost in the distance, a golden fancy which never can become true. An uncanny brooding, melancholy, seemed shed over her entire being. I have never seen her like that. Why unachievable, I began, because slavery doesn't exist any longer. Then we will go to a country where it exists, to the Orient, to Turkey, I said eagerly. You would, sovereign, in all seriousness, Wanda replied. Her eyes burned. Yes, in all seriousness, I want to be your slave, I continued. I want your power over me, to be sanctified by law. I want my life to be in your hands. I want nothing that could protect or save me from you. Oh, what a voluptuous joy, when once I feel myself entirely dependent upon your absolute will, your whim, at your beck and call. And then what happens, when at some time you're deigned to be gracious, and the slave may kiss the lips which mean life and death to him? I knelt down and leaned my burning forehead against her knee. You're talking as in a fever, said Wanda agitatedly, and you really love me so endlessly. She held me to her breast and covered me with kisses. You really want it? I swear to you now by God and my honor, that I shall be your slave, wherever and whenever you wish it. As soon as you command, I exclaimed, hardly master of myself. And if I take you at your word, said Wanda, please do. Oh, this appeals to me, she said then. It is different from anything else, to know that a man who worships me, and whom I love with all my heart, is so holy mine, dependent on my will and caprice, my possession and slave, will I? She looked strangely at me. If I should become frightfully frivolous, you are to blame, she continued. It almost seems as if you were afraid of me already, but you have sworn. And I shall keep my oath. I shall see to that, she replied, and beginning to enjoy it. And heaven help me, we won't stick to fancies now. You shall become my slave, and I shall try to be venous in furs. I thought that at last I knew this woman, understood her, and now I see I have to begin at the very beginning again. Only a little while ago her reaction to my dreams was violently hostile, and now she tries to carry them into execution with a subversed seriousness. She has drawn up a contract according to which I give my word of honor and agree under oath to be her slave, as long as she wishes. With her arm around my neck she reads this unprecedented, incredible document to me. The end of each sentence she punctuates with a kiss. But all the obligations in the contracts are on my side, I said teasing her. Of course, she replied with great seriousness, you cease to be my lover, and consequently I am released from all duties and obligations towards you. You will have to look upon my favors as pure benevolence. You no longer have any rights, and no longer can lay claim to any. There can be no limit to my power over you. Remember that you won't be much better than a dog or some inanimate object. You will be mine, my plaything, which I can break into pieces whenever I want and hour's amusement. You are nothing, I am everything. Do you understand? She laughed and kissed me again, and yet a sort of cold shiver ran through me. Won't you allow me a few conditions? I began. Conditions? She contracted her forehead. Oh, you are afraid already, or perhaps you regret, but it is too late now. You have sworn I have your word of honor. But let me hear them. First of all, I should like to have it included in our contract, that you will never completely leave me, and then that you will never give me over to the mercies of any of your admirers. But Severin, exclaimed Wanda, would her eyes fall of emotion and with tears in her eyes? How can you imagine that I, and you, a man who loves me so absolutely, who puts himself so entirely in my power? She halted. No, no, I said, covering her hands with kisses. I don't fear anything from you that might dishonor me, forgive me the ugly thought. Wanda smiled happily, leaned her cheek against mine, and seemed to reflect. We have forgotten something. She whispered cockatishly, the most important thing. A condition? Yes, that I must always wear my furs, exclaimed Wanda. But I promise you I'll do that anyhow, because they give me a despotic feeling, and I shall be very cruel to you. Do you understand? Shall I sign the contract? I asked. Not yet, said Wanda. I shall first add your conditions, and the actual signing won't occur until the proper time and place. And Constantinople? No. I have thought things over. What special value would there be in owning a slave where everyone owns slaves? What I want is to have a slave, I alone, here in our civilized sober Philistine world, and a slave who submits hopelessly to my power solely on account of my beauty and personality, not because of law, of property rights, or compulsions? This attracts me. But at any rate we will go to a country where we are not known, and where you can appear before the world as my servant without embarrassment. Perhaps to Italy, to roam our naples. We were sitting on Wanda's ottoman. She wore her ermine jacket. Her hair was loose, and felt like a lion's mane down her back. She clung to my lips, drawing my soul from my body. My head whirled, my blood began to cease, my heart beat violently against hers. I want to be absolutely in your power, Wanda. I exclaimed suddenly, seized by that frenzy of passion, when I can scarcely think clearly or decide freely. I want to put myself absolutely at your mercy, for good or evil, without any condition, without any limit to your power. While saying this, I had slipped from the ottoman, and lay at her feet, looking up at her with drunken eyes. How beautiful you are, she exclaimed. Your eyes half broken in ecstasy, fill me with joy, carry me away. How wonderful your look would be if you were being beaten to death in the extreme agony. You have the eye of a martyr. Sometimes, nevertheless, I have an uneasy feeling about placing myself so absolutely, so unconditionally, into a woman's hands. Suppose she did abuse my passion, her power? Well then, I would experience what has occupied my imagination since my childhood, what has always given me the feeling of seductive terror, a foolish apprehension. It will be a wanton game she will play with me, nothing more. She loves me, and she is good, a noble personality, incapable of a breach of faith. But it lies in her hands. If she wants to, she can. What a temptation in this doubt, this fear. Now I understand Manolesco and the poor Chevalier, who, even in the pillory, while she was another man's mistress, still adored her. Love knows no virtue, no profit. It loves and forgives and suffers everything, because it must. It is not our judgment that leads us. It is neither the advantages nor the faults which we discover that make us abandon ourselves or that repel us. It is a sweet, soft, enigmatic power that drives us on. We cease to think, to feel, to will. We let ourselves be carried away by it, and ask not wither. A Russian prince made his first appearance to-day on the promenade. He aroused general interest on account of his athletic figure, magnificent face, and splendid bearing. The woman particularly gaped at him as though he were a wild animal, but he went his way gloomily, without paying attention to anyone. He was accompanied by two servants, one enigro, completely dressed in red satin, and the other is her casian in his full gleaming uniform. Suddenly he saw Wanda and fixed his cold piercing look upon her. He even turned his head after her, and when she had passed, he stood still and followed her with his eyes. And she, she, veritably devoured him with her radiant green eyes, and did everything possible to meet him again. The cunning cockatry with which she walked, moved, and looked at him almost stifled me. On the way home I remarked about it. She net her brows. What do you want? she said. The prince is a man whom I might like, who even dazzles me, and I am free. I do what I please. Don't you love me any longer? I stammered, frightened. I love only you, she replied. But I shall have the prince pay court to me. Wanda! Aren't you my slave? she said calmly. Am I not Venus, the cruel northern Venus in furs? I was silent. I felt literally crushed by her words. Her cold look entered my heart like a dagger. You will find out immediately the prince's name, residence, and circumstances. She continued. Do you understand? But no argument, obey! exclaimed Wanda, more sternly than I would have thought possible of her. And don't dare to enter my sight until you can answer my questions. It was not till the afternoon that I could obtain the desired information for Wanda. She let me stand before her like a servant, while she leaned back in her armchair and listened to me, smiling. Then she nodded. She seemed to be satisfied. Bring me my footstool, she commanded shortly. I obeyed, and after having putted before her and having put her feet on it, I remained kneeling. How will this end? I asked sadly after a short pause. She broke into playful laughter. Why, things haven't begun yet. You are more heartless than I imagined, I replied hurt. Severin, Wanda began earnestly. I haven't done anything yet, not the slightest thing, and you are already calling me heartless. What will happen when I begin to carry your dreams to their realization, when I shall lead a gay, free life, and have a circle of admirers about me, when I shall actually fulfill your ideal, tread you underfoot, and apply the lash? She took my dreams too seriously. Too seriously? I can't stop at make-believe once I begin, she replied. You know I hate all play-acting and comedy. You have wished it. It was my idea or yours. Did I persuade you, or did you inflame my imagination? I am taking things seriously now. Wanda, I replied caressingly. Listen quietly to me. We love each other infinitely. We are very happy. Will you sacrifice our entire future to a whim? It is no longer a whim, she exclaimed. What is it? I asked, frightened. Something that was probably latent in me. She said quietly and thoughtfully. Perhaps it would never have come to light, if you had not called it to life, and made it grow. Now that it has become a powerful impulse, fills my whole being. Now that I enjoy it, now that I cannot and do not want to do otherwise. Now you want to back out. You. Are you a man? Dear sweet Wanda, I began to caress her. Kiss her. Don't. You are not a man. And you, I flared up. I am stubborn, she said. You know that. I haven't a strong imagination. And like you, I am weak in execution. But when I make up my mind to do something, I carry it through. And the more certainly the more opposition I meet, leave me alone. She pushed me away and got up. Wanda, I likewise rose and stood facing her. Now you know what I am, she continued. Once more, I warn you. You still have the choice. I am not compelling you to be my slave. Wanda, I replied with emotion and tears filling my eyes. Don't you know I love you? Her lips quivered contemptuously. You are mistaken. You make yourself out worse than you are. You're good and noble by nature. What do you know about my nature? She interrupted vehemently. You will get to know me as I am. Wanda, the sight will you submit unconditionally? And if I say no, then? She stepped close up to me, cold and contemptuous. As she stood before me now, the arms folded across her breast with an evil smile about her lips. She was in fact the despotic woman of my dreams. Her expression seemed hard and nothing lay in her eyes that promise kindness or mercy. Well, she said at last. You're angry, I cried. You will punish me. Oh, no, she replied. I shall let you go. You're free. I'm not holding you. Wanda, I, who love you so? Yes, you, my dear sir. You who adore me, she exclaimed contemptuously. But who are a coward, a liar, and a breaker of promises leave me instantly? Wanda, I, wretch! My blood rose in my heart. I threw myself down at her feet and began to cry. Tears, too, she began to laugh. Oh, this laughed was frightful. Leave me. I don't want to see you again. Oh, my God! I cried beside myself. I will do whatever you command. Be your slave, a mere object with which you can do what you will. Only, don't send me away. I can bear it. I cannot live without you. I embraced her knees and covered her hand with kisses. Yes, you must be a slave and feel the lash, for you are not a man, she said calmly. She said this to me with perfect composure, not angrily, not even excitedly, and it was what hurt the most. Now I know you, your dog-like nature, that adores me where it is kicked, and the more, the more it is maltreated. Now I know you, and now you shall come to know me. She walked up and down with long strides while I remained crushed on my knees. My head was hanging supine. Tears flowed from my eyes. Come here, Wanda commanded harshly, sitting down on the Ultraman. I obeyed her command and sat down beside her. She looked at me sombrely, and then a light suddenly seemed to illuminate the interior of her eye. Smiling, she drew me toward her breast, and began to kiss the tears out of my eyes. The odd part of my situation is that I like the bear in Lily's park. I can escape, and don't want to. I'm ready to endure everything as soon as she threatens to set me free. If only she would use the whip again. There is something uncanny in the kindness with which she treats me. I seem like a little captive mouse with which a beautiful cat prettily plays. She is ready at any moment to tear it to pieces, and my heart of a mouse threatens to burst. What are her intentions? What does she purpose to do with me? It seems she has completely forgotten the contract, my slavehood. Or was it actually only stubbornness? And she gave up her whole plan as soon as I no longer opposed her and submitted to her imperial whim. How kind she is to me. How tender. How loving. We're spending marvelously happy days. Today she had me raid her the scene between Faust and Mephistopheles, in which the latter appears as a wandering scholar. Her glance hung on me with strange pleasure. I don't understand, she said, when I had finished, how a man who can read such great and beautiful thoughts with such expression and interpret them so clearly, concisely, and intelligently can at the same time be such a visionary and super sensual nanny as you are. Were you pleased? said I, and kissed her forehead. She gently struck my brow. I love you, Severin, she whispered. I don't believe I could ever love any one more than you. Let us be sensible. What do you say? Instead of replying, I folded her in my arms. A deep, inward, yet vaguely sad happiness filled my breast. My eyes grew moist, and a tear fell upon her hand. How can you cry, she exclaimed. You are a child. On a pleasure drive we met the Russian prince in his carriage. He seemed to be unpleasantly surprised to see me by one the side, and looked as if he wanted to pierce her through and through with his electric gray eyes. She, however, did not seem to notice him. I felt, at that moment, like kneeling down before her and kissing her feet. She let her glance glide over him indifferently as though he were an inanimate object. A tree, for instance, and turned to me with her gracious smile. End of Section 3. Section 4. When I sat good night to her to-day, she seemed suddenly unaccountably distracted and moody. What was occupying her? I am sorry you are going, she said, when I was already standing on the threshold. It is entirely in your hands to shorten the hard period of my trial to cease tormenting me, I pleaded. Do you imagine that this compulsion isn't a torment for me, too, one that I interjected? Then ended, I exclaimed, embracing her. Be my wife. Never, Severin, she said gently, but with great firmness. What do you mean? I was frightened in my innermost soul. You are not the man for me. I looked at her, and slowly withdrew my arm which was still about her waist. Then I left the room, and she, she did not call me back. A sleepless night, I made countless decisions only to toss them aside again. In the morning, I wrote her a letter in which I declared our relationship dissolved. My hand trembled when I put on the seal, and I burned my fingers. As I went upstairs, to hand it to the maid, my knees threatened to give way. The door opened, and one that thrust forth her head full of curling papers. I haven't had my hair pressed yet, she said, smiling. What have you there? A letter. For me? I nodded. Ah, you want to break with me? She exclaimed mockingly. Didn't you tell me yesterday that I wasn't the man for you? Repeat it now. Very well, then. My whole body was trembling. My voice failed me, and I handed her the letter. Repeat, she said, measuring me coldly. You forget that is no longer a question as to whether you satisfy me as a man. As a slave, you will doubt let's do well enough. Madam, I exclaimed aghast. That is what you will call me in the future, replied Wanda, throwing back her head with a movement of unutterable contempt. Put your affairs in order within the next twenty-four hours. The day after tomorrow I shall start for Italy, and you will accompany me as my servant. Wanda, I forbid any sort of familiarity, she said, cutting my word short. Likewise, you are not to come in unless I call or ring for you, and you are not to speak to me until you are spoken to. From now on your name is longer Severin, but Gregor. I trembled with rage, and yet unfortunately I cannot deny it. I also felt a strange pleasure and stimulation. But, Madam, you know my circumstances. I began in my confusion. I am dependent on my father, and I doubt whether he will give me the large sum of money needed for this journey. That means you have no money, Gregor, said Wanda, delightedly. So much the better. You are then entirely dependent on me, and in fact my slave. You don't consider, I try to object, that as a man of honour it is impossible for me. I have indeed considered it. She replied almost with a tone of command. As a man of honour you must keep your oath and redeem your promise to follow me as slave, whether so ever I demand, and obey whatever I command. Now leave me, Gregor. I turned toward the door. Not yet. You may first kiss my hand. She held it out to me with a certain proud indifference, and I the dilettante, the donkey, the miserable slave, pressed it with intense tenderness against my lips, which were dry and hot from excitement. There was a gracious nod of the head. Then I was dismissed. Though it was late in the evening, my light was still lit, and the fire was burning in the large green stove. There were still many things among my letters and documents to be put in order. Autumn, as this usually the case with us, had fallen with all its power. Suddenly she knocked at my window with the handle of her whip. I opened, and saw her standing outside in her ermine-line jacket, and in a high round cossack cap of ermine, of the kind which the great Catherine favoured. Are you ready, Gregor? She asked darkly. Not yet, mistress, I replied. I like that word, she said then. You're always to call me mistress, do you understand? We leave here tomorrow morning at nine o'clock. As far as the district capital, you will be my companion and friend. But from the moment that we enter the railway-coach, you are my slave, my servant. Now close the window, and open the door. After I had done as she had demanded, and after she had entered, she asked, contracting her brows ironically, Well, how do you like me? Wonder you, who gave you permission? She gave me a blow with the whip. You're very beautiful, mistress. Wanda smiled, and sat down in the armchair. Kneel down, here, beside my chair. I obeyed, kissed my hand. I seized her small, cold hand, and kissed it, and the mouth. In a search of passion, I threw my arms around the beautiful, cruel woman, and covered her face, arms, and breasts with glowing kisses. She returned them with equal fervour. The eyelids closed as in a dream. It was after midnight when she left. At nine o'clock sharp in the morning everything was ready for departure, as she had ordered. We left the little Carpathian health resort in a comfortable light carriage. The most interesting drama of my life had reached a point of development whose denouncement it was then impossible to foretell. So far everything went well. I sat beside Wanda, and she chatted very graciously and intelligently with me, as with a good friend, concerning Italy. Pisamsky's new novel and Wagner's music. She wore a sort of Amazonesque travelling dress of black cloth with a short jacket of the same material, set with dark fur. It fitted closely and showed her figure to best advantage. Over it she wore dark furs. Her hair wound into an antique knot lay behind a small dark fur hat from which a black veil hung. Wanda was in a very good humour. She fed me candies, played with my hair, loosened my neck cloth, made a pretty cockade of it. She covered my knees with her furs and stealthily pressed the fingers of my hand. When our Jewish driver persistently went on nodding to himself, she gave me a kiss, and her cold lips had the fresh frothy fragrance of a young autumnal rose, which blossoms alone amid bare stalks and yellow leaves, and upon whose calyx the first frost has hung tiny diamonds of ice. We are in the district capital. We get out at the railway station. Wanda throws out her furs and places them over my arm and goes to secure the tickets. When she returns, she has completely changed. Here is your ticket, Gregor. She says in a tone which supercilious ladies use to their servants. A third-class ticket. I reply with comic horror. Of course, she continues. But now be careful. You won't get on until I am settled in my compartment and don't need you any longer. At each station, you will hurry to my car and ask for my orders. Don't forget. And now give me my furs. After I had helped her into them, humbly, like a slave, she went to find an empty first-class coupe. I followed, supporting herself on my shoulders. She got on and I wrapped her feet in bare skins and placed them on the warming bottle. Then she nodded to me and dismissed me. I slowly ascended a third-class carriage which was filled with abominable tobacco smoke that seemed like the fogs of Archaean at the entrance to Hades. I now had the leisure to muse about the riddle of human existence and about its greatest riddle of all, women. Whenever the train stops, I jump off, run to the carriage, and with drawn cap await her orders. She wants coffee and then a glass of water. At another time a bowl of warm water to wash her hands, and thus it goes on. She lets several men who have entered her compartment pay courts to her. I am dying of jealousy and have to leap about like an antelope, so as to secure what she wants quickly and not miss the train. In this way the night passes. I haven't had time to eat a mouthful and I can sleep. I have to breathe the same onion air with Polish peasants, Jewish peddlers, and common soldiers. When I mount the steps of her coop she is lying stretched out on cushions in her comfortable furs covered up with the skins of animals. She is like an oriental despot, and the men sit like Indian deities straight upright against the walls and scarcely dare to breathe. She stops over in Vienna for a good day to go shopping and particularly to buy series of luxurious gowns. She continues to treats me as her servant. I follow her at the respectful distance of ten paces. She hands me her packages without so much as even daining a kind look and laden down like a donkey. I pant along behind. Before leaving she takes all my clothes and gives them to the hotel waiters. I am ordered to put on her livery. It is a Cracovian costume in her colours. Light blue with red facings and red quadrangular cap ornamented with peacock feathers. The costume is rather becoming to me. The silver buttons bear her coat of arms. I have the feeling of having been sold or of having bonded myself to the devil. My fair demon leads me from Vienna to Florence. Instead of linen garbs, mezzovians and greasy-haired chews my companions now are curly haired contandini, a magnificent surgeon of the first Italian grenadiers and a poor German painter. The tobacco smoke no longer smells of onions but of salami and cheese. Night has fallen again. I lie on my wooden bed as on a rack. My arms and legs seem broken. But there nevertheless is an element of poetry in the affair. The stars sparkle round about. The Italian surgeon has a face like a polo velveteer and the German painter sings a lovely German song. Now that all the shadows gather and endless stars grow light, deep yearning on me falls and softly fails the night. Through the sea of dreams, sailing without seas, sailing goes my soul in dine to find release. I am thinking of the beautiful woman who is sleeping in regal comfort among her soft furs, Florence, crowds, cries, in fortunate porters and cab drivers. Wanda chooses a carriage and dismisses the porters. What have I a servant for? she says. Take it, get the luggage. She wraps herself in her furs and sits quietly in the carriage while I drag the heavy trunks hither, one after another. I break down for a moment under the last one. A good-natured carabineer with an intelligent face comes to my assistance. She laughs. It must be heavy, said she. All my furs are in it. I get up under driver's seat, wiping drops of perspiration from my brow. She gives the name of the hotel and the driver urges on his horse. In a few minutes we halt at the brilliantly illuminated entrance. Have you any rooms? She asks the portier. Yes, madame. Two for me, one for my servant, all with stoves. Two first-class rooms for you, madame, both with stoves, replied the waiter, one up and one without heat for your servant. She looked at them and then abruptly said, They are satisfactory. Have fires built at once. My servants can sleep in the unheated room. I merely looked at her. Bring up the trunks, Gregor, she commands, paying no attention to my looks. In the meantime I'll be dressing and then we'll go down to the dining room and you can eat something for supper. As she goes into the adjoining room I drag the trunks upstairs and help the waiter build a fire in her bedroom. He tries to question me in bad French about my employer. With a brief glance I see the blazing fire, the fragrant white poster bed and the rugs which cover the floor. Tired and hungry I then descend the stairs and ask for something to eat. A good-natured waiter who used to be in the Austrian army and takes all sorts of paints to entertain me in German shows me the dining room and waits on me. I have just had the first fresh drink in 36 hours and the first bite of warm food on my fork when she enters. I rise. What do you mean by taking me into a dining room in which my servant is eating? She snaps at the waiter flaring with anger. He turns around and leaves. Meanwhile I thank heaven that I am permitted to go on eating. Later I climb the four flights upstairs to my room. My small trunk is already there and the miserable little oil lamp is burning. It is a narrow room without fireplace without a window but with a small air-hole. If it weren't so beastly cold it would remind me of one of the Venetian footnotes these were notorious prisons under the leaden roof of the palace of the doge and footnote involuntarily I have to laugh out aloud so that it re-echoes and I am startled by my own laughter. Suddenly the door is pulled open and the waiter with his theatrical Italian gesture calls you are to come down to Madame at once. I pick up my cup stumbled down the first few steps but finally arrive in front of a door on the first floor and knock come in I enter shut the door and stand the tension Wanda has made herself comfortable she is sitting in a negligee of white muslin and laces on a small red divan with her feet on a footstool that matches she has thrown her fur cloak about her it is the identical cloak she appeared to me for the first time as goddess of love the yellow lights of the candelabra which stand on projections their reflections in the large mirrors and the red flames from the open fireplace play beautifully on the green velvet the dark brown stable of the cloak the smooth white skin and the red flaming hair of the beautiful woman her clear but cold face is turned toward me and her cold green eyes rest upon me I am satisfied with you Gregor, she began I bowed come closer I abate, still closer she looked down and stroked the stable with her hand Vedas and first receives her slave I can see that you are more than an ordinary dreamer you don't remain far in arrears of your dreams you are the sort of man who is ready to carry his dreams into effect no matter how mad they are I confess I like this it impresses me there is strength in this and strength is the only thing one respects I actually believe that under unusual circumstances in a period of great deeds what seems to be your weakness would reveal itself as extraordinary power under the early emperors you would have been a martyr at the time of the reformation an anabattist during the French Revolution one of those inspired diamondists who mounted the guillotine with the marseillaises on their lips but you are my slave my she suddenly leaped up the first slipped down and she threw her arms with soft pressure about my neck my beloved slave Severin oh I love you how handsome you are in your curacovian costume you will be called tonight up in your wretched room without a fire shall I give you one of my first dear heart the large one there she quickly picked it up throwing it over my shoulders and before I knew what had happened I was completely wrapped up in it how wonderfully becoming furs are to your face they bring out your noble line as soon as you seize being my slave you must wear your velvet coat with sable do you understand otherwise I shall never put on my fur jacket again and again she began to caress me and kiss me finally she drew me down on the little divan you seem to be placed with yourself in furs she said quick quick give them to me or I will lose all sense of dignity I placed the furs about her and one the slipped her right arm into the sleeve this is the pose in Titian's picture but now enough of joking don't always look so solemn it makes me feel sad as far as the world is concerned you are still merely my servant you are not yet my slave for you have not yet signed the contract you are still free and can leave me any moment you have played your part magnificently I have been delighted but aren't you tired of it already and don't you think I am abominable well say something I command it must I confess to you Wanda I began yes you must even if you take advantage of it I continued I shall love you the more deeply adore you the more fanatically the worse you treat me what you have just done inflames my blood and intoxicates all my senses I held her close to me and clung for several moments to her moist lips oh you beautiful woman I then exclaimed, looking at her in my enthusiasm I tore the sable from her shoulders and pressed my mouth against her neck you love me even when I am cruel said Wanda now go you bore me, don't you hear she boxed my ears so that I saw stars help me into my first slave I helped her as well as I could how awkward she exclaimed it was scarcely in it before she struck me in the face again I felt myself growing pale did I hurt you she asked softly touching me with her hand no no I exclaimed at any rate you have no reason to complain now kiss me again I threw my arms about her and her lips clunk closely to mine as she lay against my breast in her large heavy furs I had a curiously oppressive sensation it was as if a wild beast a she-bear were embracing me it seemed as if I were about to fuel her claws in my flesh but this time her she-bear let me off easily with my heart filled with smiling hopes I went up to my miserable servant room and threw myself down on my heart couch life is really amazingly droll I thought a short time ago the most beautiful woman, Venus herself rested against your breast and now you have an opportunity for studying the Chinese hill unlike us they don't hurl into flames but they have devils chasing them out into fields of ice very likely the founders of their religion also slept in unheated rooms during the night I started out of my sleep with a scream I had been dreaming of an ice-field in which I had lost my way I had been looking in vain for a way out suddenly an Eskimo drove up in a sleigh he had the face of the waiter who had shown me to the unheated room what are you looking for here my dear sir he exclaimed this is the north pole a moment later he had disappeared and wanded over the smooth ice on tiny skates her white satin skirt fluttered and crackled the ermine of her jacket and cap but especially her face she shot towards me enclosed me in her arms and began to kiss me suddenly I felt my blood running warm down my side what are you doing I asked, horror-stricken she laughed and as I looked at her now it was no longer Wanda but a huge white she-bear who was digging her paws into my body found out in despair and still heard her diabolical laughter when I awoke and looked about to room in surprise early in the morning I stood at Wanda's door and the waiter brought the coffee I took it from him and served it to my beautiful mistress she had already dressed and looked magnificent all fresh and rosy it she smiled graciously at me and called me back come, Gregor have your breakfast quickly too, she said then we will go house-hunting I don't want to stay in the hotel any longer than I have to it is very embarrassing here if I chat with you for more than a minute people will immediately say the fair Russian is having an affair with her servant, you see the race of Catherine's isn't extinct yet half an hour later we went out Wanda was in her cloth gown with a Russian cap and eye in microcovian costume we created quite a stir I walked about ten paces behind looking very solemn but expected more entirely to have to break out into loud laughter there was casually a street in which one or the other of the attractive houses did not bear the sign Camere amabiliate Wanda always sent me upstairs and only when the apartment seemed to answer her requirements did she herself ascend by noon I was as tired as a stag hound after the hunt we entered a new house and left it again without having found the suitable habitation Wanda was already somewhat out of humor suddenly she said to me Severin, the seriousness with which you play your part is charming and the restrictions which we have placed upon each other are really annoying me I can't stand it any longer I do love you I must kiss you let's go into one of the houses but my lady I interposed Gregor she entered the next open corridor and descended a few steps of the dark stairway then she threw her arms about me with passionate tenderness and kissed me oh Severin you were very wise you're much more dangerous as a slave than I would have imagined you're positively irresistible and I am afraid I shall have to fall in love with you again don't you love me any longer then I asked seized by a sudden fright she suddenly shook my hand but kissed me again with her swelling adorable lips we returned to the hotel Wanda had luncheon and ordered me also quickly to get something to eat of course I wasn't served as quickly as she until it happened that just as I was carrying the second bite of my steak to my mouth the waiter entered and called out with his theatrical gesture Madame wants you at once I took a rapid and painful leave of my food and tired and hungry hurried toward Wanda who was already on the street I wouldn't have imagined you could be so cruel as it reproachfully with all these fatiguing duties you don't even leave me time to eat in peace Wanda laughed gaily I thought you had finished she said but never mind man was born to suffer and you in particular the martyrs didn't have any beef steaks either I followed her resentfully knowing at my hunger I have given up the idea of finding a place in the city Wanda continued it will be difficult to find an entire floor which is shut off and where you can do as you please in such a strange mad relationship as ours there must be no jarring note I shall rent an entire villa and you will be surprised you have my permission now to satisfy your hunger and look about Tibetan Florence I won't be home till evening if I need you then I will have you called I looked at the Duomo the Palazzo Vecchio the Lodgia di Lanzi and then I stood for a long time on the banks of the Arno again and again I let my eyes rest on the magnificent ancient Florence whose round cupolas and towers were drawn in soft lines against the blue cloudless sky I watched its splendid bridges beneath whose wide arches the lively waves of the beautiful Yellow River ran and the green hills which surrounded the city bearing slender cypresses and extensive buildings places and monasteries it was a different world this one in which we are a gay, sensuous, smiling world the landscape too has nothing of the seriousness and somberness of ours it is a long way off to the last white villas scattered among the pale and of the mountains and yet there isn't a spot that isn't bright with sunlight the people are less serious than we perhaps they think less but they all look as though they were happy it is also maintained that death is easier in the south I have a vague feeling now that such a thing as beauty without thorn and love of the senses without torment does exist it has discovered a delightful little villa and rented it for the winter it is situated on a charming hill on the left bank of the Arno opposite the Cacine it is surrounded by an attractive garden with lovely paths grass plots and magnificent meadows of camellias it is only two stories high quadrangular in the Italian fashion an open gallery runs along one side a sort of lotia with plaster casts of antique statues stone steps lead from it down into the garden from the gallery you enter a bath with a magnificent marble basin from which winding stairs lead to my mistress's bed chamber Wanda occupies the second story by herself a room on the ground floor has been assigned to me it is very attractive and even has a fireplace in the garden on a round hillock I discovered a little temple but I found its door locked however there is a chink in the door and when I glue my eye to it I see the goddess of love on a white pedestal a slight shudder passes over me it seems as if she were smiling at me saying are you there? I have been expecting you end of section 4 section 5 of Venus in First this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org recording by J. C. Guan Venus in First by Leopold von Sachem Masoch section 5 it is evening an attractive maid brings me orders to appear before my mistress I ascend the wide marble stairs pass through the ante room a large salon furnished with extravagant magnificence and knock at the door of the bedroom I knock very slowly for the luxury displayed everywhere intimidates me consequently no one hears me and I stand for some time in front of the door I have a feeling as if I were standing before the bedroom of the great Catherine and it seems as if at any moment she might come out and her green sleeping furs with the red ribbon and decoration on her bare breast and with her little white powdered curls I knocked again Wanda impatiently pulls the door open why so late she asks I was standing in front of the door but you didn't hear me knock I replied timidly she closes the door and clinging to me she leads me to the bed the mask Ottoman is resting the entire arrangement of the room is in red the mask wallpaper, curtains, porters hangings of the bed a magnificent painting of Samson and Delilah forms the ceiling Wanda receives me in an intoxicating disabye her white satin dress flows gracefully and picturesquely down her slender body leaving her arms and breast bare slowly they nestle in the dark hair of the great fur of the sable lined with green velvet her red hair falls down her back as far as the hips only half held by strings of black pearls Venus and furs I whispered while she draws me to her breast and threatens to stifle me with her kisses then I no longer speak and neither do I think everything is drowned out of unimaginable bliss do you still love me she asked her eyes softening in passionate tenderness you ask I exclaimed you still remember your oath she continued with an alluring smile now that everything is prepared everything in readiness I ask you once more is it still your serious wish to become my slave am I not ready you have not yet signed the papers papers what papers oh I see you want to give it up she said well then we will let it go but Wanda I said you know that nothing gives me greater happiness than to serve you to be your slave I would give everything for the sake of feeling myself whole in your power even unto death how beautiful you are I whispered when you speak so enthusiastically so passionately I am more in love with you than ever and you want me to be dominant stern and cruel I am afraid it will be impossible for me to do so I am not afraid I replied smiling where are the papers so that you may know what it means to be absolutely in my power I have drafted a second agreement in which you declare to kill yourself in that way I can even kill you if I so desire give them to me while I was unfolding the document and reading them Wanda got pen and ink she then sat down beside me with her arm about my neck and looked over my shoulder at the paper the first one read agreement between Madame von Dunayev and Severin von Kusiemski ceases with the present day being the affianced of Madame von Dunayev and renounces all the rights appertaining thereunto he on the contrary binds himself on his word of honour as a man and nobleman that hereafter he will be her slave until such time as she herself sets him at liberty again as the slave of Madame von Dunayev he is to bear the name Greger and he is unconditionally to comply with every one of her wishes and to obey every one of her commands he is always to be submissive to his mistress and is to consider her every sign of favour as an extraordinary mercy Madame von Dunayev is entitled not only to punish her slave as she deems best even for the slightest inadvertence or fault but also is herewith given the right to torture him as the mood may seize her or merely for the sake of whiling away the time should she so desire she may kill him whenever she wishes in short he is her unrestricted property should Madame von Dunayev ever set her slave at liberty Severn von Komsyemsky agrees to forget everything that he has experienced or suffered as her slave and promises never under any circumstances and in no wise to think of vengeance or retaliation Madame von Dunayev on her behalf agrees as his mistress to appear as often as possible in her first especially when she purposes some cruelty toward her slave appended at the bottom of the agreement was the date of the present day the second document contains only a few words having since many years become weary of existence and its illusions I have of my own free will put an end to my worthless life I was seized with a deep horror when I had finished there was still time I could still withdraw but the madness of passion and the sights of the beautiful woman that lay all relaxed against my shoulder carried me away this one you will have to copy Severn said Wanda indicating the second document it has to be entirely in your own handwriting this of course in the case of the agreement I quickly copied the few lines in which I designated myself as suicide and handed them to Wanda she read them and put them on the table with a smile now have you the courage to sign it she asked with a crafty smile in climbing her head I took the pen let me sign first said Wanda your hand is trembling are you afraid of the happiness that is to be yours she took the agreement and pen while engaging in my internal struggle I looked upward for a moment it occurred to me that the painting on the ceiling like many of those of the Italian and Dutch schools was utterly unhistorical but this very fact gave it a strange mood which had an almost uncanny effect on me Delilah an opulent woman with flaming red hair lay extended half disrobed in a dark fur coat a pony red otoman and bent smiling over Samson who had been overthrown and bound by the Philistines her smile in its mocking cockatry was full of a diabolical cruelty her eyes half closed met Samson's and his with a last look in passion cling to hers for already one of his enemies is kneeling on his breast with the red hot iron to blind him no said Wanda why you're all lost in thought what is the matter with you everything will remain just as it was even after you have signed don't you know me yet dear heart I looked at the agreement her name was written there in bold letters appeared once more into her eyes with their potent magic then I took the pen and quickly signed the agreement you're trembling said Wanda calmly shall I help you she gently took hold of my hand and my name appeared at the bottom of the second paper Wanda looked once more at the two documents and then locked them in the desk which stood at the head of the otoman now then give me your passport and money I took out my wallet and handed it to her she inspected it nodded and put it with other things while in a sweet drunkenness I kneeled before her leaning my head against her breast suddenly she thrust me away with her foot leaps up and pulls the bell rope in answer to its sound three young slender negrises enter they are as if carved of ebony and are dressed from head to foot in red satin each one has a rope in her hand suddenly I realize my position and I'm about to rise Wanda stands proudly erect her cold beautiful face with its somber brows and contemptuous eyes is turned toward me she stands before me as a mistress commanding gives a sign with her hand and before I really know what has happened to me the negrises have dragged me to the ground and have tied me hand and foot as in the case I've wand about to be executed my arms are bound behind my back so that I can scarcely move give me the whip Heidi commands Wanda with unearthly calm the negrise hands it to her mistress kneeling and now take off my heavy first they impede me the negrise obeyed the jack had there Wanda commended Heidi quickly brought her the kazaibaika set with ermine which lay on the bed and Wanda slipped into it with two inimitable graceful movements now tie him to the pillar here the negrises lifted me up and twisting a heavy rope around my body tied me standing against one of the massive pillars which supported the top of the wide Italian bed then they suddenly disappeared as if the earth had swallowed them Wanda swiftly approached me her white satin dress flowed behind her in a long train like silver like moonlight her hair flared like flames against the white fur of her jacket now she stood in front of me with her left hand firmly planted on her hips in her right hand she held the whip she uttered an abrupt laugh now play has come to an end between us she said with heartless coldness now we will begin in dead earnest you fool I laugh at you and despise you you who in your insane infatuation have given yourself as a plaything to me the frivolous and capricious woman who longer the man I love but my slave at my mercy even unto life and death you shall know me first of all you shall have a taste of the whip in all seriousness without having done anything to deserve it so that you may understand what to expect if you are awkward disobedient or refractory with a wild grace she rolled back her furline slave back I winced for the whip cut like a knife into my flesh well how do you like that she exclaimed I was silent just wait you will yet whine like a dog beneath my whip she threatened and simultaneously began to strike me again the blows fell quickly in rapid succession with terrific force upon my back arms and neck it was my teeth not to scream aloud now she struck me in the face warm blood ran down but she laughed and continued her blows it is only now I understand you she exclaimed it really is a joy to have someone so completely in one's power and a man at that who loves you do you love me no oh I'll cheer you to shreds yet now twist like a worm scream whine you will find no mercy in me finally she seemed tired she tossed the whip aside stretched out on the auto man and rang the negris has entered untie him as they loosened the rope I fell to the floor like a lump of wood the black women grinned showing their white teeth they did it but I was unable to rise come over here Gregor I approached the beautiful women never did she seem more seductive to me than today in spite of all her cruelty and contempt one step further one decommended now kneel down and kiss my foot she extended her foot beyond the hem of the white satin and I, the supercentral floor pressed my lips upon it now you won't lay eyes on me for an entire month Gregor she said seriously I want to become a stranger to you so you will more easily adjust yourself to our new relationship in the meantime you will work in the garden and await my orders now off with you slave a month has passed with monotonous regularity heavy work and a melancholy hunger hunger for her who is inflicting all these torments on me I am under the gardener's orders I help him lop the trees and prune the hedges transplant flowers turn over the flowerbed sweep the gravel paths I share his coarse food and his heart caught I rise and go to bed with the chickens now and then I hear that our mistress is amusing herself surrounded by admirers once I heard her gay laughter even down here in the garden I seem awfully stupid to myself was it the result of my present life or was I so before the month is drawing to a close the day after tomorrow what will she do with me now or has she forgotten me and left me to trim the hedges and bind bouquets till my dying day a written order the slave Gregor is here with ordered to my personal service Wanda Dunaev with a beating heart I draw aside the damask curtain on the following morning and enter the bedroom of my divinity it is still filled with a pleasant half darkness is it you Gregor she asks will I kneel before the fireplace building a fire I tremble at the sound of the beloved voice I can see her herself visible behind the curtains of the four poster bed yes my mistress I reply how late is it past nine o'clock breakfast I hasten to get it and then kneel down with the tray beside her bed here is breakfast my mistress Wanda draws back the curtains and curiously enough at the first glance when I see her among the pillows with loosened hair she seems an absolute stranger a beautiful woman but the beloved soft lines are gone the space is hard and has an expression of wariness and sassity or is it simply that formerly my eye did not see this she fixes her green eyes upon me more with curiosity than with menace perhaps even somewhat pittingly and lazily pulls to the dark sleeping fur on which she lies over the bared shoulder at this moment she's very charming very maddening and I feel my blood rising to my head and heart the tray in my hands begin to sway she notices it and reaches out for the whip which is lying on the toilet table you are awkward slave she says furring her brow I lower my looks to the ground and hold the tray as steadily as possible she eats her breakfast yawns and stretches her opulent limbs in the magnificent furs she has rung I enter take this letter to Prince Corsini I hurry into the city and hand the letter to the prince he is a handsome young man with glowing black eyes consumed with jealousy I take his answer to her what is the matter with you? she asks with lurking spitefulness you are very pale nothing mistress I merely walked rather fast at luncheon the prince is at her side and I am condemned to serve both her and him they joke and I am as if none existent for both for a brief moment I see black I was just pouring some bordeaux into his glass I put over the table cloth and her gown how awkward Wanda exclaimed and slapped my face the prince laughed and she also but I felt the blood rising to my face after luncheon she drove in the Corsini she has a little carriage with a handsome brown English horse and holds the reins herself I sit behind and notice how cockatishly she acts and I hold a smile when one of the distinguished gentlemen bows to her as I help her out of the carriage she leans lightly on my arm the contact runs through me like an electric shock she is a wonderful woman and I love her more than ever for dinner at six she has invited a small group of men and women I serve but this time I do not spill any wine over the table cloth a slap in the face is more effective than ten lectures it makes you understand very quickly especially when the instruction is by the way of a small woman's hand after dinner she drives to the Pergola theater as she descends the stairs in her black velvet dress with its large collar of ermine and with a diadem of white roses on her hair she is literally stunning I open the carriage door in front of the theater I leap from the driver's seat and in the lighting she leans on my arm which trembled under the sweet burden I open the door of her box and then wait in the vestibule the performance lasts four hours she receives visits from her cavaliers the while I grit my teeth with rage it is way beyond midnight when my mistress's bell sounds for the last time fire she orders a bra play and when the fireplace crackles tea when I return with the Samovar she has already undressed and with the aid of the Negres slipped into a white negligee Hades there upon leaves hands me the sleeping furs says Wanda sleepily stretching her lovely limbs I take them from the armchair and hold them while she slowly leaves she then throws herself down on the cushions of the ottoman take off my shoes and put on my velvet slippers I kneel down and tug at the little shoe which resists my efforts hurry, hurry Wanda exclaims you're hurting me just you wait I will teach you she strikes me with the whip still a kick and then I can go to bed tonight I accompanied her to a soiree in the entrance hall she ordered me to help her out of her furs then with a proud smile confident of victory she entered the brilliantly illuminated room again I waited with gloomy and monotonous thoughts watching hour after hour run by from time to time the sounds of music reached me the door remains open for a moment several servants tried to start a conversation with me but soon desisted since I knew only a few words of Italian finally I fell asleep and dreamed that I murdered Wanda in a violent attack of jealousy I was condemned to death and saw myself strapped on the board then I fell I felt it on my neck but I was still alive then the executioner slapped my face no it wasn't the executioner it was Wanda who stood rightfully before me demanding her furs I was at her side in a moment and help her on with it there is a deep joy in wrapping a beautiful woman into her furs and in seeing and feeling how her neck and magnificent limbs nestle in the precious soft furs and to lift the flowing hair over the collar when she throws it off a soft warmth and a faint fragrance of her body still clings to the ends of the hairs of Sable it is enough to drive on mad finally a day came when there were neither guests nor theater nor other company I breathed a sigh of relief Wanda sat in the gallery breathing and apparently had no orders for me at dusk when the silvery evening mist fell she withdrew I served her at dinner she ate by herself but had not a look not a syllable for me not even a slap in the face I actually desire a slap from her hand tears fill my eyes and I feel that she has humiliated me so deeply that she doesn't even find it worthwhile to torture or maltreat me any further before she goes to bed her bell calls me you will sleep here tonight I had horrible dreams last night and I'm afraid of being alone take one of the cushions from the Ottoman and light down on the bearskin at my feet then Wanda put out the lights the only illumination in the room was from a small lamp suspended from the ceiling she herself got into bed don't stir so as not to wake me I did that she had commanded but could not fall asleep for a long time I saw the beautiful woman beautiful as a goddess lying on her back on the dark sleeping furs her arms beneath her neck with a flood of red hair over them I heard her magnificent breast rise in deep regular breathing and whenever she moved ever so slightly I woke up and listened to see whether she needed me but she did not require me no task was required of me I meant no more to her than a night lamp or a revolver which one places under one's pillow am I mad or is she does all this arise out of an inventive wanton woman's brain with the intention of surpassing my supracential fantasies or is this woman really one of those neuronian characters who take a diabolical pleasure in treading underfoot like a worm like human beings who have thoughts and feelings and will like theirs what have I experienced when I knelt with a coffee-tree beside her bed wanton suddenly placed her hand on my shoulder and her eyes plunged deep into mine what beautiful eyes you have she said softly and especially now since you suffer are you very unhappy I bowed my head and kept silent she suddenly exclaimed passionately can you still love me she drew me close with such vehement that the coffee-tree upset the can and cups fell to the floor and the coffee ran over the carpet wonder my wonder I cried out and held her passionately against me I covered her mouth face and breast with kisses it is my unhappiness that I love you more and more madly the worse you treat me the more frequently you betray me oh, I shall die of pain and love and jealousy but I haven't betrayed you as yet, Severin replied wonder smiling not wonder, don't jest so mercilessly with me I cried haven't I myself taken the letter to the prince of course it was an invitation for luncheon you have since we have been in Florence I have been absolutely faithful to you replied wonder I swear it by all that is holy to me all that I have done was merely to fulfill your dream and it was done for your sake however I shall take a lover otherwise things will only be half accomplished and in my end you will yet reproach me with not having treated you cruelly enough my dear beautiful slave but today Severin again, the only one I love I haven't given away your clothes they are here in the chest go and dress as you used to in the little Carpathian health resort when our love was so intimate forget everything that has happened since oh, you will forget it easily in my arms I shall kiss away all your sorrows she began to treat me tenderly like a child to kiss me and caress me finally she said with a gracious smile go now and dress I too will dress shall I put on my fur jacket oh yes, I know, now run along when I returned she was standing in the center of the room in her white satin dress and the red Kazabayka edged with ermine her hair was white with powder and over her forehead she wore a small diamond diadem she reminded me in an uncanny way of Catherine II but she did not give me much time for reminiscences she drew me down on the ottoman beside her and we enjoyed two blissful hours she was no longer the stern capricious mistress she was entirely a fine lady a tender sweetheart she sold me photographs and books which had just appeared and talked about them with so much intelligence clarity and good taste that I, more than once carried her hand to my lips and raptured she then had me recite several of Lermontov's poems and when I was all afire with enthusiasm she placed her small hand gently on mine her expression was soft and her eyes were filled with tender pleasure are you happy? not yet she then leaned back on the cushions and slowly opened her Kazabayka but I quickly covered the half-bared breast again with the airmine you're driving me mad, I stammered come I was already lying in her arms and like a serpent she was kissing me with her tongue and again she whispered are you happy? infinitely, I exclaimed she laughed aloud it was an evil, shrill laugh which made cold shivers run down my back you used to dream of being the slave the plaything of a beautiful woman and now you imagine you are a free human being a man my lover you fool a sign from me and you are a slave again down on your knees I signed down from the utema unto her feet but my eyes still clung doubtingly on hers you can't believe it she said looking at me with her arms folded I confessed I am bored and you will just do to wallow away a couple of hours of time don't look at me that way she kicked me with her foot you are just what I want a human being a thing, an animal she rang the three negrises entered tie his hands behind his back I remained kneeling and unresistingly let them do this I went into the garden down to the little vineyard which forms the southern boundary corn had been planted between the espaliers and here and there a few dead stalks still stood to one side was a plow the negrises tied me to a post and amused themselves ticking me with their golden hair needles but this did not last long before Wanda appeared with her ermine cap on her head and with her hands in the pockets of her jacket she had me untied and then my hands were fastened together on my back she finally had a yoke put around my neck and harnessed me to the plow then her black demons drove me out into the field one of them held the plow the other one led me by a line the third applied a whip and venison first stood to one side and looked on when I was serving dinner on the following day Wanda said bring another cover I want you to dine with me today and when I was about to sit down opposite her she added no over here close by my side she is in the best of humours gives me soup with her spoon feeds me with her fork and places her head on the table like a playful kitten and ferts with me I have the misfortune of looking at Haidi who serves in my place perhaps a little longer than is necessary it is only now that I noticed her noble almost European cast of countenance and her magnificent statue as kibust which is as if hewn out of black marble the black devil observes that she pleases me and grinning shows her teeth she has hardly left the room before Wanda leaps up in a rage what? I want to look at another woman besides me perhaps you like her even better than you do me she is even more demonic I am frightened I have never seen her like this before she is suddenly pale even to the lips and her whole body trembles Venus in furs is jealous of her slave she snatches the whip from its hook and strikes me in the face she then calls her black servant who binds me and carry me down to the cellar where they throw me into a dark dank subterranean compartment a veritable prison cell then the lock of the door clicks the bolts are drawn a key sings in the lock I am a prisoner buried I have been lying here for I don't know how long bound like a cough on a bundle of damp straw without any light without food without sleep it would be like her to let me starve to death if I don't freeze to death before then I am shaking with cold or is it fever I believe I am beginning to hate this woman a red streak like blood floods across the floor it is a light falling through the door which is now thrust open wonder appears on the threshold wrapped in her sables holding a lighted torch are you still alive? she asks are you coming here to kill me? I reply with a low hoarse voice with two rapid strides wonder reaches my side she kneels down beside me and places my head in her lap are you ill? your eyes glow so do you love me? I want you to love me she draws forth a short dagger I start with fright when its blade gleams in front of my eyes I actually believe that she is about to kill me she laughs and cuts the ropes that bind me every evening after dinner she now has me called I have to read to her and she discusses with me all sorts of interesting problems and subjects she seems entirely transformed it is as if she were ashamed of the savagery which she betrayed to me and of the cruelty with which she treated me a touching gentleness transfigures her entire being and one at a good night she gives me her hand a superhuman power of goodness and love lies in her eyes of the kind which calls forth tears in us and causes us to forget all the misery of existence and the sorrows of death End of section 5 October 2008