 Yeah, I think I did go through phases where I was pretty quiet. I was pretty observant. I mean, I did have that that kind of feeling like what could I possibly say? And part of that was was this lesson in the Course where Jesus says, you know, I will perform miracles through you. But he says I will perform miracles through you. It's like you're not going to do them. I'll do them through you. You just have to be willing and ready and have to be in a state that just temporarily you're without fear because miracles cannot be performed through you if there's a sense of doubt and fear there. So I saw that as, okay, I really just need to practice being open and willing to kind of be a vehicle or be an instrument. And then the next thing was Jesus was saying I will direct you so don't try to direct the miracle. That was a big problem at the beginning. I thought I knew who needed the miracles. Oh, mom and dad, they definitely needed the miracles. My sister, oh, yeah, you know, I was like, I thought I knew from the egoic perspective who needs a miracle here. And and it would always blow up in my face. And I think, hmm, it didn't work very well. I thought I was ready, but I was trying to direct the miracle. Who needs, you know, he's saying, I'll bestow the miracle, you know, where where it can be affected, where it can be given and received. So that was very humbling. I remember the workbook lesson, I will step back and let him leave the way. Oh, that's what you're trying to teach me. The frustration came in where I would like think these people at work or this situation or this ex friend or whatever, you know, they really need a miracle. It was like, no, no. So that was like the biggest, the biggest surrendering, yielding away from that. That was the most helpful thing. I remember with my with my biological mother, with the mother, at one point I had so much enthusiasm and passion about the miracles that I was trying to tell her about the miracles. And she first, she said, I don't need a minister. And I was like, Oh, and then and then after that, shortly after that came the words, you need to find other people to share this with. And I was like, Oh, that's the Holy Spirit speaking to me directly through mom. You need to find other people. You need to let the spirit direct where the miracles are bestowed. So then instead of trying to, like you say, change the projections, change the situations or whatever, I just said, OK, then I give you my mind spirit to use as you would direct. That's pretty much how the workbook ends. This holy instant when I give to you, be you in charge for I would but follow. I was like, Oh, that's how this works. Instead of me trying to change people and direct who needs to be changed and everything, I just need to let go of all of that and say, I'm going to take the parameters off. And not say I need to handle these people at work and this and this and this. Maybe I don't need to handle these people at work. Maybe I don't even belong here, you know, at this job. What do you want? You know, instead of trying to perform the miracle in the job or with the partner or whatever it's like, should I stay at this job? Should I be with this partner? Should I keep doing what I've been doing for the last 10 years or something? You know, or is there something else? And there was something else. It's like, yeah, I want you to be a miracle worker. I want you will be used in ways I was told that you can't even imagine and it can't even fathom, so don't even try. Don't ask for the five-year plan, you know. I'll give it to you one moment at a time and be ready to work with it. Oh! And therefore, I started to be guided and directed where to work, who to be with, how to use my time in very practical ways. And then it was very helpful. And then, okay, you have student loans. We're going to work at paying those loans off. I've got other things for you, but you can't abdicate on responsibilities that you set up, even if it was the ego that set them up. The Spirit said, I'm going to have to unwind you from these, maybe they're false obligations and duties that the ego set up, but I'm still going to have to unwind you from them. I've used the analogy recently of like a screw, you know, a screw that goes into a wall. I mean, once the screw is in the wall, you can take the pliers if you want and you can yank on that screw, but it ain't coming out. You screw, and we're not talking plastic, we'll say into woods. It's in there. You can get your pliers out if you want. You can even get a hammer, back of a hammer and try to pull the screw out. You have to unwind a screw that's wound in, we'll say hardwood, oak, a steel screw wound into oak, oh boy, that's what the ego is. It's a steel screw wound into oak with a power screwdriver. Okay, that's your starting point. The hammer ain't going to work, the back of the hammer, the pliers, it ain't going to work. You have to get the power screw out again and the screwdriver and turn it to reverse and it's going to be slow at the beginning too. Don't expect that thing to come whipping out of there. You know, it's going to have to turn and that's the way my life went. I had to start to say, you direct me, you show me where to go, you show me where to perform miracles. You're in charge and I will just follow you. And when you get into that humble state of being willing to listen and follow like that, that's a good start. Doesn't matter how tight that thing is wound in there, it's coming out. The power of the Holy Spirit is just magnitude when you join your mind with the Holy Spirit, you know, that screw's coming out of there. And so that's what happened more and more with relationships, with jobs, with career, with all the things that seem to be so essential in this world. I had to be like unwound from that. And the other thing about Jesus is you can say anything you want, you know, like I would go back and forth with it, I'd say money doesn't grow on trees. I'm sorry, I can't go out and just pick hundred dollar bills off of trees and everything. And Jesus would say, I know you believe that and I'm going to have to show you another way. You know, I'm going to have to show you and teach you divine providence. Like with Mother Teresa, she had to open up to live in divine providence. And to tell you the truth, we're all living in divine providence. It's just that when there's so many ego overlays, you don't know it. You actually can believe that jobs are your sustenance and pensions and stock dividends and food. And, you know, on and on and on, all these things can seem like sustenance when really it's we all are stained by the love of God. We just have forgotten it and need to be, you know, unwound out of this ego belief of scarcity and lack.