 The story I'm going to share with you today is personal, it is very touching and it really hits home. So GamesRadar published an article today about a certain someone who used to create content on YouTube and how Breath of the Wild literally saved his life. Let's just dive into it. I'm going to read the article verbatim, I'm going to put images of it up for you to follow along. If you'd rather read it yourself, obviously there will be a link to it down in the description below and then we're going to talk about it after. Until that night I thought scary was airplane turbulence. I thought it was telling that one girl how much you like her. I thought it was movies about dudes who wear masks. I was wrong. I didn't know what scary meant until that night. I didn't know what scary meant until I found myself lying on a couch at 3am, paralyzed by a combination of desperation, hopelessness and benzoidizapine. I didn't know what scary meant until I was gasping and crying. I heard myself say something I never thought I'd say, I want to kill myself. I can't say depression is the scariest thing I've ever experienced because I can't compare it to any other experience. It's a daily struggle with pain and anxiety. You never seem to win and it consumes everything. Jobs, relationships, friends, dreams, it's like a black hole that sucks in all things that mean something to you and tears them apart on a molecular level. Depression was destroying my world. That's why I'm so grateful I had another. It's amazing how much life can change in a day. You can wake up in your own bed with your own apartment and your own life, but you can fall asleep in your friend's living room, your legs dangling over the edge of a couch and your marriage dangling over the edge of a divorce. Sometimes all it takes is one unseasonably warm day in March to learn that no one lasts forever. Well, almost no one. I didn't think about it much at the time, but looking back it was almost poetic. Just as some of my most important relationships in my life were flickering, one of the oldest was about to be rekindled. Just as I was losing my marriage, my career, my ambition, and my interest in getting off the couch in the morning, I was also gaining something. Something more important than I realized, and maybe more important than I realized even now. What I needed? A friend the most. There he was. Granted, he was dressed a bit differently these days, but it's hard to forget pointy ears, especially when you're as tight as Link and I were. We used to be inseparable, but you know how it goes. One guy pursues a career, the other guy pursues motion, plus things change. We still hung out over the years, but things were never the same as they used to be. Back when we'd spent hours hunting spiders, back when finding a new lake or mountain, was all it took for our imaginations to burst with possibility and wonder. But that was a long time ago. When the possibility and wonder seemed to have dried up, we were different people now. Link looked like he wore people now, and used their blood to draw shapes on his chest, and I had looked like I had only eaten twice in the last three days, because I had only eaten twice in the last three days. When your actual stamina wheel is that low, it's hard to get excited about a pretend one. I trudged to the store to pick up my switch, but I had never been less excited about a Nintendo console. Even less so for the new Zelda game Breath of the Wild. Days passed before I even took off the plastic wrap. A decision I can only imagine trying to explain to my 14 year old self. I was holding a ticket to Hyrule, a place I used to cherish and wholly, genuinely as if it were real, but I didn't care. Depression wouldn't let me care. Link was waiting, and it meant nothing to me. Less than nothing. Imagine my surprise when it meant everything. It took about three minutes to figure out Breath of the Wild was a special game. The moment I saw the game world, a seemingly endless expanse of color, light, and opportunity was instantly one of the most powerful moments I had ever experienced in gaming. It reminded me of stepping into Hyrule Field in Ocarina of Time, or watching the perspective pull behind the visor in Metroid Prime. One of those moments gamers spent years waiting for, and even longer reminiscing over. It had been months since I felt interest in doing anything, but I couldn't pull myself away from Breath of the Wild. When I wasn't playing it, I was thinking about it. When I wasn't thinking about it, I was asleep. When I wasn't asleep, I was playing it. I watched as my gameplay hours matched and surpassed, and doubled those of my Nintendo Switch friends, some of whom had spent more than 100 hours in Hyrule themselves, but they played the game and moved on. I did not. In fact, I was doing everything but moving on. I was sneaking up on the sparrows to snap the perfect photos for my compendium. I was walking over every bridge and hillside in Hyrule just to ensure I had the locations marked on my map. I was hunting all 900 Korok seeds, well aware of what a gargantuan task and let down it would be. As 100 hours turned into 200, and into 250, I just kept looking for things to do. Anything to do. Whether it was stalking enemy encampments or searching for banana groves, I just wanted to be in Hyrule. And that's when I realized I wasn't there for the game. I was there for the world. Through the lens of depression, the difficulty of day-to-day living can become magnified, even overwhelming, says Dr. Teal Fitzpatrick, a Pittsburgh psychologist with a decade of experience providing psychotherapy and psychological assessment services, including to me. For individuals with severe depression, escapism that is not destructive is an essential part of the recovery process, says Fitzpatrick. Finding relief from the objective world through creative expression, fiction, movies, or gaming can provide an essential and nourishing break from the very difficult work of managing depression symptoms. When you're depressed, the world around you tightens and constricts until it feels like you're locked in a closet with a burnt out light. Even though you know what things are around you, you can't see those things the way you used to. You can't see anything the way you used to, and the world becomes a dark, suffocating, small place. But Hyrule is the opposite. In Hyrule, the light is so bright, it seems to come from everywhere, shooting like beams from each blade of grass. In Hyrule, I was always on the verge of something new, a promising discovery that freed my spirits from the two-ton anchor of my own thoughts. In Hyrule, if only for a few hours, I could breathe. Breath of the Wild had become very significant to me. It had nothing to do with the gameplay or the graphics or any of the things critics like to drool over. Hyrule had become my escape. It provided me with a sanctuary from myself, allowing me to interrupt the pain and anxiety with comfort and peace, the hopelessness and defeat with courage and optimism. And the more time I spent there, the more therapeutic it became. The more I got to know Hyrule, the more it had to teach me. Yes, life is filled with storms. In Hyrule, they seem to come every hour, but they never last forever. And no matter how violent or dark the storms become, the clouds part, the sun breaks through, and the sky celebrates with a display of color that makes the gray a distant memory. Yes, the things we love break. In Hyrule, all my favorite swords and shields eventually shatter into pieces, losing something or someone you love is devastating. But the pain of loss is temporary. There's always a new love somewhere, just waiting for you to find it. And yes, ponies die, but in Hyrule, there's always a horse god in some pond. One of the most exhausting things about depression is how it amplifies what you feel. For the people closest to you, this is where your depression causes frustration. It's impossible for them to understand your negativity when the objective reality seems so positive. You're so fortunate, you're so healthy, you're so talented, you're so loved. They repeat these things almost desperately, baffled and even hurt that you can't see such obvious realities. But it's hard to see what's real when your mind is so focused on what you feel. In depression, feelings are paramount, says Fitzpatrick. Often, individuals with depression describe feeling everything with such intensity that it's physically painful, or feeling apathetic to the point of emptiness. Emotions become defining. All of my energy was absorbed by my feelings. I obsessed over every passing thought and emotion until I convinced myself an unanswered text meant 13 different worst case scenarios, and they had all come true simultaneously. I stopped trying things, I stopped pursuing things, even the things that mattered most to me. I was so crippled by feeling that I stopped doing. But that's when I noticed something about Link. I learned a lot from Hyrule, and it's wonderful, enchanting complexities, but one of Breath of the Wild's most important lessons came from its hero, which is strange, considering he never actually says a word, which is actually kind of the point. Link had just as many problems as the rest of us. His friends were dead, his memory was erased, and his would-be girlfriend had been fighting a demon for the last century. And yet, Link never dismayed. He never collapsed in tears or doubted his resolve, and he never let his feelings cloud his decisions or suppress his actions. Through Link, I was reminded what it's like to do. In Zelda, the hero is not defined by emotions, by what he does, where he goes and how he moves forward, says Fitzpatrick. This ability to move into a character who exists by doing rather than feeling can provide immense relief, and in some cases, help model a type of purposeful action that can translate into daily living. It had been so long since I had a sense of achievement in my own life. I felt a tangible spark whenever Link and I accomplished something on our journey. In fact, our journey had become part of my treatment. I talked to Teal every week. I visited my doctor every month, and on the days in between, I had Link. I had my Switch, which I could literally take anywhere I needed to. I had Hyrule, a world where I felt so at peace. I was able to work through some of the difficulties of the real world without even realizing it. I thought I was just saving the princess. I had spent nearly 300 hours in Hyrule, a number that shocked me, given how short that time had felt. I'd finally run out of things to do. I found all 120 shrines, all 900 Korok seeds. I completed 100% of the map. I found and fully upgraded every piece of armor. I filled the Hyrule compendium. I wrapped up every last side quest, short of finishing the game. I had nothing left to do there, but I had a lot to do here. I had taken steps in my treatment, but it was time to step further. Now that I was getting a grip of my depression and how to manage it, it was time to stop putting off my life. And the first was to stop putting off the game. Individuals with depression often describe a different sense of time passing, says Fitzpatrick. Difficult moments can feel like an eternity and pleasure and joy seem fleeting. Although Link may engage inside projects or parallel adventures, the ultimate goal is to move forward. Everything is temporary in his world, and this reminds us that everything is temporary in our world too. I had come to Hyrule for a reason. With no distractions left, it was time for Link and I to do what we came to do. After almost 300 hours, we finally stormed the castle, slew the demon and saved the princess. I'd faced Ganon and other Zelda games, but because of what Breath of the Wild had meant to me, this battle was more intense than any of the others. It was bittersweet. It was emotional. It was cathartic. It was over. My time in Hyrule was over, and it was time to face my world with the same kind of bravery. I'm not saying my demons are slain. I'm not saying I don't have awful days when it's a struggle to get off the couch. I'm not saying Breath of the Wild cured me. You don't exactly cure depression, certainly not with a video game, but it's difficult for me to imagine how things would have unfolded without it. Depression is like a storm of emotion that rages inside you every day, and it can be almost impossible to navigate those winds. Breath of the Wild was my paraglider. I'd be lying if I said it wasn't difficult to read the words as they appeared on the screen. The finality of seeing the end hit me like a cannonball in the chest. What if I slipped back? What if I had another one of those sweaty sleepless nights? What if I heard myself say those words again? And that's when Breath of the Wild dropped its final lesson to me. There are no more princesses to save, dude. It's time to save yourself. This is, I know that was long, but I needed to get through this full story because it really hits close to home. I've suffered depression. I like to think right now in 2017 that I no longer suffer depression, but it never goes away. I'm not nearly as bad as I used to be. I don't see a therapist anymore. I don't take medicine anymore. I'm not doing anything that I feel like needs to be treated. I don't have the suicidal thoughts that I once had in my life. But that doesn't mean that I, I guess I'm lucky, right? I'm fortunate. I was able to work myself, admit I had issues, get help, and get myself better. And every now and then I get close to slipping back into it, but through lessons I've learned in life, I pull myself back up. And Zelda was one of those lessons. It wasn't Breath of the Wild for me, but it was games like The Wind Waker. And even more recently, when I was feeling really, really down, a link between worlds. The Zelda games just lifted me up. They took me out of my world, gave me another world to cling onto and more life lessons to learn. And often we think these lessons are for children, but honestly, I don't think these lessons are fully understood unless you're an adult, unless you're experiencing this stuff. My fiance, my lovely, lovely fiance, she's battling depression right now. She was battling depression before I've ever met her, so I've never even known her without her having depression. And after we had three children, her depression got worse. Postpartum depression is a real thing. And if you already have depression and you get postpartum on top, it's tough. Plus she has anxiety issues, which make it even harder. If you've ever had anxiety, see, I'm fortunate. While I had extreme depression, I didn't have anxiety on top. Anxiety brings that depression to a whole new level, a level I never fully understood until I started dating my now fiance. She deals with it a lot. She goes to therapy, she's on medication. I've had to pull her out of some dark places and she's linked me. I think one of the primary reasons that she even loves me as much as she does is because I am one of the only people in her life that has stuck by her side through all of the bad stuff that's happened. Her bad decision she's made because she's depressed, getting her out of dark places where she wanted to commit suicide, I was there. I didn't go away. I didn't run from the problem because I had been to some of these situations myself. Now, I was thankfully able to escape the video games. She was escaping to things like the casino. She was escaping to things like drinking. And even more recently, a little bit of drugs. And it was bad. And I helped her get out of all of it. I stood by her side. I gave her confidence. I told her I understand because I do understand. I don't quite get the anxiety but I've seen it bubble up in her. And my best friend, Eric, part of the Nintendo Prime podcast, he also suffers from depression. He's been on medication for a long time. And I'm not gonna sit here and tell his story because that's his story to tell. Just like I can't really tell the story of my fiance and why she might be as depressed as she is. Again, that's her story to tell to you guys one day if she wants. But I can only tell you what I have done and how I have picked up these people in my life and how I've learned to pick myself up and how I try to pass these lessons on to everybody else. And I'm happy that to this day, video games can still be an escape for people and not just an escape to get away from their problems in life but an escape that can teach them something. And I always said that Breath of the Wild was a special game. Breath of the Wild is my favorite game of all time. It's not perfect. I've literally lobbied tons of criticism at it in ways I think it could get better because I don't think any video game is perfect. Of course I always say that. And then in my mind, Secret of Mana is the perfect video game but then I still like Breath of the Wild better. So I don't know what's happened. What's happened with my brain over the years here but Breath of the Wild is an experience. And while I wasn't depressed while playing it, it's definitely a game that I know in the future I'm going to turn to when I start feeling that wave coming on, that wave of hopelessness. You know, I could argue it happened today. I know this is gonna sound funny but I didn't get a lot of sleep last night. So I mean, that's not so much funny. I have chronic knee pain. It doesn't happen all the time. It's from an injury I had when I was a kid. They're not sure if surgery will help or make it worse. So I just deal with it until it's to a point I can't deal with the pain anymore. It doesn't restrict me. I can run and spread and everything. It just hurts. So it cut me up late last night. You know, yes, I was working on a video. Some of you guys know, but the whole reason I was up in the first place was because of my knee. I was even up past when the video was done. Probably didn't fall asleep till 3 or 4 a.m. and I had to wake up at 6 a.m. with my children and I haven't gone back to sleep since. Been with my kids, got them ready for school, got a yada yada yada. So that all happened. And I had to go grocery shopping. So after my fiance woke up and she got ready for the day, I went grocery shopping. And I know this is really, really dumb and really, really funny for some people, but I leaned over to get some corn and this person walked right by me and farted in my face. And I'm already tired. I'm already, you know, at my wit's end because I'm trying to just survive today. And that sucked. And I thought, okay, maybe it's the worst thing that's gonna happen. I get home, my girlfriend goes to work. And my fiance goes to work. And I get, you know, my older kids are gone at school. My youngest, I finally get them on a nap. I'm making some tacos for myself, trying to get the kitchen cleaned up a little bit. And I can tell you right now, the time I'm recording the kitchen is still not clean. And I have my plate of food and my phone and everything. And I start walking downstairs to my office because what I normally do is I'll start work while eating. And what I do during the eating part of my work is obviously I can't record or work on videos, but I'll be looking up news. And that's how I actually discovered this story, was I discovered it while I was eating. And as I was doing that, as I was coming down the stairs, I stepped on one of my kid's toys that was kind of hidden against the back of the step. So as you're walking down the stairs, you don't see it. Walking up the stairs, you can see it, but walking down the stairs, you don't. And I stepped on it. And I stepped on it with the back heel of my leg that has the chronic knee pain. And that leg also happens to have a messed up ankle from when I was a kid. I mean, as I said, I have no physical restrictions and I'm extremely athletic despite my weight. So I'm not one to complain about that kind of thing usually. That's why I've never brought it up before. But I fell down the stairs. And I fell down the stairs hard. I've fallen down the stairs in my life several times. In fact, how I hurt my ankle when I was younger was falling down the stairs. This fall was 10 times harder than any fall I've ever had. I literally thought I broke my arm. I, thankfully, the very first part of my body that hit was my booty. And I had some cushion on my booty so that helped brace it a little bit. Although that really, really hurt. My knee buckled and snapped, which again, that's just part of my knee problems. And that really, really hurts. It feels like you got shot by a gun. Or at least what I would imagine feeling like getting shot by a gun is. And then on top of all of that, I fall, you know, obviously I ended up rolling as I was falling and really slammed my shoulder hard. Thankfully it was my shoulder, not my neck, or my head into the wall. Didn't break the wall, although I think there's actually a slight dent in it now. I have to double check. And I thought I broke my arm because I couldn't lift my arm for, I don't know, or my shoulder or one of the two. I couldn't lift it for like five minutes. And I just kept thinking, of course this is happening to me. Of course I couldn't get sleep. Had that bad incident at Walmart. You know, as funny as it might be to some people, it just kind of kept my crappy day going. And then this, my fiance is gone. She has the only vehicle we have to drive. So even if I want to get to the hospital, I can't. I can't dial 911 because I need someone to take care of my kid. I couldn't get a hold of my parents. I'm sitting here as an adult wondering, what am I going to do? What is the most responsible thing to do? And in that moment, I wanted to give up for a second. Just a brief second. I didn't necessarily want to kill myself, but I just wanted to give up at life. I didn't want to have to worry about my kid, or go take care of my kid. I didn't want to take care of myself. I just wanted to sit there, cry, and do nothing. I didn't want to move. Not because I'm in pain. I just, I gave up. But I kept thinking about all of the good stuff I have that sometimes doesn't resonate with you when you're depressed. And this is how I know I'm not depressed. I'm just having a bad day. Is I was able to think about the good things in my life and that helped me get back up. Now, when I was depressed, that would have never worked. But stories like this were very touching on a day like today when I went through all that because it's important to understand that people that are going through this, you're never going to see eye to eye with them. You're never going to understand it. I've been through depression and I still don't fully understand my best friend and my fiance's depression either because they both deal with high levels of anxiety that I never did. So I don't understand it. I just observe and try to help when I can. And thankfully I have some understanding of the base depression stuff because I've been there. I've wanted to kill myself. I know what it's like to give up and have hopelessness. I had it for a fleeting second today where I felt hopeless. So it never goes away. But this story is touching. And I just want to hear, do you guys have any stories you're willing to share? What do you guys think about the video games and Breath of the Wild in particular being an escape? Does it make you think differently about people and about this medium of entertainment regardless of all the nickel and diming that people think's going on out there or factually is going on out there in some cases? That video games as an entertainment medium, just like any other entertainment medium can help people in ways you might not realize. Anyways, folks, let me know what you think about all of this down in the comments below. I am Nathaniel Alvedance from Nintendo Prime. If you like this video, you know what to do. And if you dislike the video, hit that dislike button. Subscribe for more content and I'll catch you in the next one.