 J-E-L-L-O! The Jell-O program starring Jack Benny with Mary Livingston and Phil Harris of these orchestras. The orchestra opens a program with Love is on the Air tonight from Varsity Show. Here's some helpful advice for every woman who likes to keep her family in good spirits. Give them Jell-O for dessert, not just once in a while, but often. For one of the grandest things about Jell-O is the wide variety of ways in which you can serve it. There are six lovely glowing colors to add real beauty to your main use. Six rich, delicious flavors to tempt every appetite. And there's almost no limit to the different Jell-O dishes which you can prepare. Dozens and dozens of desserts and salads, easy to make, attractive to look at, well to taste. You'll find definite recipe suggestions on every package of Jell-O. Just be sure you get genuine Jell-O and don't accept any substitutes. So there's only one Jell-O, and only Jell-O brings you that delicious, extra-rich fruit flavor. Ask your grocer for Jell-O. Love is on the air tonight, played by Phil Harris and his orchestra. And now, ladies and gentlemen, we bring you that prominent comedian, musician, and after-dinner speaker, Jack Benny. Jell-O again, this is Jack Benny talking, and thanks Don for finally giving me a legitimate introduction. But no kidding, how did you happen to mention that I was an after-dinner speaker? Well, Jack, you know, I heard your speech at the Eddie Cantor anniversary last Thursday night, and I thought you did us well, John. Well, thanks, thanks, thanks. Of course, I did think your voice sounded a little strained and unnatural. Well, I'll tell you, Don, they called on me right in the middle of the dinner, and I had a talk through a Brussels sprout. But that was quite an affair, wasn't it? Oh, yes, Jack, and a great gesture to a great comedian. And I think Eddie Cantor deserves that tribute. Oh, so do I, Don. But of course, oh, well, let it go. Of course what? Come here a minute, Don. You know what burns me up? I know I haven't been in show business as long as Cantor. I know that. But this is my fourth year with Jell-O, isn't it? Yes, it is, Jack. And you'd think that someone would give me a dinner. Well, well, well. Who, for instance? My sponsor, General Foods. Gee, if a food program doesn't think of a dinner, who will? Now, wait a minute, Jack. You have no complaint to make it all. Jell-O and General Foods have been mighty sweet to you, and furthermore, you've been very well paid. Look, Don, it isn't the money. There's something beyond dollars and cents. All I want is a little tribute from coast to coast. That's all a little gratitude. Hello, Jack. What are you talking about tonight? Oh, nothing, Mary. Don and I were just talking about the Eddie Cantor dinner. Were you there, Mary? Oh, sure. I was there right from the start. You were? How'd you like my speech? Well, the service was slow, too. No, I don't know. I thought my speech was funny enough. You got more last when you were eating. That's so. Well, I was nervous. And who wouldn't be? I was sitting right next to the governor of California, Governor Merriam. Well, you didn't have to throw your chicken bones on his plate. I did. Oh, is that why he was glaring at me? Is he married? Do you think the governor saw at me for that? No, but don't ever kill anybody in this state. I won't believe me. You know, Mary Jack seems to think that Jell-O ought to give him a dinner. A dinner? Yes. You mean instead of a salary? No. Don't put any ideas into people's heads. I think you ought to give our sponsors a dinner for being so nice to you all these years. Oh, so you're sticking up for them, huh? I'll say. I know what side my bread is Jell-O'd on. Hey, that's very clever. Did Kenny help you think of that? Gosh, no. I never think of anything. Oh, hello, Kenny. Hello, did you just get here? Yeah. I'm sorry I'm a little late, Jack, but I was over in the next studio talking to Charlie McCarthy. Oh, was Edgar Bergen there, too? No, just Charlie and I. And you were talking to Charlie McCarthy, eh? Yeah, jeez, he dumb. Well, he's supposed to be. He's a dummy. Oh, say, Jack, if you think I'm bad, Edgar Bergen came over later and, oh, boy, is he all mixed up. Why, what happened? He asked Charlie to sing and put me in a suitcase. Oh, can you imagine that, Mary? Edgar Bergen thought Kenny was Charlie McCarthy. Gee, if he can't tell him apart, who can? Don't look at me. Me, neither. Don't worry, Kenny. We'll find somebody. By the way, Kenny, did you tune in on the Eddie Canter dinner Thursday? Yes, and it was a swell program. Did you hear my speech? No, I don't think so. Well, didn't you hear Dr. Giannini or Governor Mariam? Yeah, which one were you? Which one was I? The one who's jealous. I'm not jealous. All I said was that Jello might have done the same for me. Oh, don't let it bother you, Jack. Sure, don't let it worry you. Say who's worrying about it? Who cares? You do. I mean besides me. Answer the phone, Mary. OK. Hello? Yes? Oh, hello, Mr. Campbell. It's for you, Jack Lawton, Campbell of General Food. Oh, the boss? Well, hello, Mr. Campbell. How are you? I'm fine, thanks. How are things in New York? Well, that's good. What? Me? Oh, no, Mr. Campbell. I just, no, I just felt that Jello might give me a dinner. What? No, I'm not hungry, Mr. Campbell. But I just thought that, I know, but I just thought, I know, but I just, but I, but I. That's killing him. Quiet. Now, look, look, Mr. Campbell, I'm not tooting my horn. I'm a violin player. Is that so? What? Oh, all right, he wants to talk to you, Mary. Hello, Mr. Campbell. Hello, Mr. Campbell. But what? No, Jack feels all right. He's just a little nervous, I guess. After all, he's not a kid anymore. I'm not, I am younger than he is. Nothing, Mr. Campbell. Jack just said that he's younger than you are. You little traitor. What? What did he say, Mary? Well, what did he say? He said you'll age around option time. That's what I get for appreciating me. Yes, Mr. Campbell. All right, thank you. Goodbye. Gee, Mary, do you think he's really mad at me? No, Jack, he knows you don't mean anything you say. That's right. Of course, it won't hurt me to look around for something. Well, anyway, I guess it'll blow over. Hey, Kenny. Yes, Jack? It's time for your song. How about it? I already sang it. You did? Where? In the suitcase. Oh, how did it sound? Not so good. I had my feet in my mouth. Well, now that you've straightened out, sing it again. OK. Wait a minute, Kenny. Come in. Telegram for Jack Benny. Say good, Mary. Now, what are you going to sing tonight, Kenny? I'm going to sing Rosita. Oh, that's a beautiful number. Jack, this wire's from the Western Costume Company. Western Costume Company? What does it say? It says, dear Mr. Benny, stop worrying about Canter's dinner and return that full dress suit. Oh, that slipped my mind. Oh, Kenny, I must send that right over. I'm the voice of the principal now. Awaken to my pleading sad, my soul hear my gay serenade. Rosita, sung by Kenny Baker. And Kenny, I don't know how it sounded in that suitcase, but out here it was swell. Thanks. You know, there's one nice thing about you, Jack. You always compliment me after my song. Well, Kenny, I only do it because you deserve it. You're really a great delineator of songs. Yeah. Well, you are. Jack, what does delineator mean? Well, Mary, it means, uh, well, delineator means, uh, it means, well. Yeah. Oh, I know what it is. I just can't find the word. Hey, Phil, what does delineator mean? Delineator? That's it. Well, it means, uh, delineator means, uh, well, uh. So Jack told me. Honey, I got her right on the tip of my tongue. Ask your boys, Phil. I'm not going to wake them up just for one word. No, I wouldn't bother, no. Say, Phil, I heard that you and the orchestra were working down in Phoenix, Arizona this past week, some sort of a celebration there. Yes, Jack, they're having a big fiesta. Oh, a fiesta? That's a sort of a, uh, oh, oh, what is it, Mary? I'm still working on delineator. Well, stay with it. The fiesta is, uh. Gee, we don't know anything, do we? Kenny, you know, Phil, I was going to drive down to Phoenix and see you. Gee, I wish you had. Say, Jack, have you still got that old Max will you bought last week? I didn't hear that. What is that, Phil? I said, have you still got that old Max will you bought last week? Oh, I sure have. Now, wait a minute, Kenny. That car is holding up great, so don't laugh. Who's laughing? Well, I'm satisfied with it, and that's all it counts. Have you been driving it around much, Jack? Oh, sure, I made a lot of trips this week, Don. I opened her up, and she certainly can go, believe me. Jack, tell them what happened Wednesday morning when we were out driving. Oh, no, not with this gang around, no. You tell us, Mary, what was it? Well, now, Mary. Oh, what's the difference? Come on, Mary, tell us. Well, Jack and I were out driving Wednesday morning on Wilshire Boulevard, and there was a great big truck right in front of us. Mary. Anyway, we were riding along, and all of a sudden, the truck backfired. And what happened? Jack's motor dropped out. Well, that could happen to anyone. Anyway, there's one thing about my car. It never backfired. It wouldn't dare to. Well, fellas, have your little fun. I'm a big enough guy to take it. Come in. Another telegram for Jack Benny. Right here, son, and thank you. Say, don't you ever give tips? Tips, with Christmas only two months off. Who's the wire from, Jack? Here it is, a dear buff. Oh, it's from Andy. Listen to this, fellas. It's a dear buff. Wish you and the gang would come over to our place tonight and giving a Halloween party in our barn. Oh, boy, a Halloween party. We're going to have it last night, but the cider wasn't hard enough. Come over right away as we're going strong, Andy. Oh, boy, cider. Kenny, you can't have cider. You'll drink milk. All right, but I'll stagger just the same. Well, come on, fellas. Let's go right over. Before the party's over. I'm ready. Me, too, I was going to wear a masquerade costume. Say, that would be fun. See, we could all go with something. I wonder what I could be. Why don't you part your hair and go to the Lincoln Highway? Oh, let's not bother. We haven't got time anyway. Come on, fellas. OK. Wait a minute, wait a minute. I've got to lead the next number. All right, Bill, and as soon as you're through, meet us over there. Will you hurry up, fellas? Hold on, Jack. I've got an announcement to make. We'll make a Don hurry up. OK, ladies and gentlemen, when you're out shopping and looking for an economical dessert, be sure to ask for Jell-O with its new extra rich fresh fruit flavor. Wait a minute, not so fast, Don. This is important. It's not only easy to make, but it comes with a system of delicious flavors, strawberry, raspberry, cherry, orange, lemon, and lime. Come on, let's go. All right, Bill. See you later, Bill. How are we going to get there, Jack? How are we going to get there? In my car, it's right downstairs. Oh, no. Now, don't be silly. There's no danger. Come on. I wouldn't ride in that car if you put on bank nights. There's nothing to worry about. Now, who's willing to take a chance? That's the spirit. I'll get there in no time. So long, Bill. So long. They're pretty soon. OK, hey, Don. Help me ship this gear, will you? Righto, righto. That's better. Say, Kenny, what's that you got under your arm? I don't know. That's a fender and put it back. Yeah, here we are, fellas. There's Andy standing out in front with a lander. Right up. Come on, get out, everybody. You get here so fast. I walked. Come here, Phil. Don't tell anybody about this, will you? Well, I won't if I don't have to ride home with you. It's a bargain. Say, Andy, is it all right if I leave my car out here? Drive it in the. And then it's well-party, Mary, right in the barn. Isn't this real atmosphere? You said it. Open the window. Now, don't be funny. Hey, Buck, you remember Ma, don't you? Oh, sure. How are you, Mr. Divine? Happy New Year, yeah. Having a good time? Hey, Andy, isn't that your paw over there? No, that's the goat. Oh, I should have known better. Your paw hasn't got horn. He should have. He's a devil. Here's paw. Hey, paw, you say a lot about. How are you feeling, young fella? Just fine, Mr. Divine. How are you? Oh, pretty good for a man 83 years old. No, kidding. Are you really 83? Yes, sir, but don't tell my wife. Why not? She thinks I'm 81. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. 83 and you look so healthy. So how do you count for it? Well, I led a good free life up to the age of 10. That's remarkable, Mr. Divine. You deserve a pat on the back. Don't do it. I'll fall apart. You wouldn't think so to look at you. What holds you together? I use adhesive tape for underwear. That adhesive tape, how do you get it off? That's been worrying me for years. Hey, Mr. Divine, you remember Mary, don't you? Oh, yeah, darn tootin'. Hello, Junior. How do you marry? Say, how'd you like to wiggle through a hot rumba? Hot rumba? Yeah, that's me, old sizzle hips. Now every. You behave yourself. Pipe down more, you're repulsive. Oh, Jack, let's join the gang. They're over there bobbing for apples. Say, that's a lot of fun, bobbing for apples. Sure is. Let's go, Mary. If you find one with teeth in it, it's mine. Come on, Jack. Hey, Bob, how about a little apple cider? Sure thing, Andy, right with you. Come on, everybody. Aren't you having a little cider? Am I? Leave me to it. Now how about you, Phil? I'm on my second jug now. Ha ha ha ha. Oh, Jack, look at that little pig, isn't he cute? Yeah. And a dog too. Gee, look, and there's a couple of cows. Hey, Andy, how'd you happen to have all your animals at the party? Well, Pa got the invitations mixed up, and I can't insult him now. Oh, I see, I see. I have to dance with a bull. I'm going home. Well, wait until he asks you. Now, how about another drink, fellas? Oh, Jack, look what I found. Kenny, Kenny, get away from that horse. It'll bite you. Not this end. Well, it's dangerous. Say, Bob, let's have a little entertainment. How about some excitement? Well, we're all here. Let's start something. Oh, Jack, listen to me, fellas, listen. I've got a good idea. Let's get Mary to sing a song. Oh, come on, come on, come on. Oh, no, but I will. Atticurl, atticurl. What are you going to sing, Mary? Uh-dee. Sure thing. Well, that's well, and we'll all join in on the second chorus. I hit it, boy. Any mountains that you want to have clumped, baby. Clumped. Have you got any oceans that you want to have clumped, baby? Clumped. I'll get out of my bonnet and shore. I'll get into my nothing at all. I'll give out with a wife mullet crawl. And over the waves, we go splash, dunk. Have you got any cotton that you want me to fly, baby? Wow, wow. You can tell all the papers that I did it because I don't. Bill and Andy, you take it. Have you got any castles that you want me to build, baby? Have you got any dreams that you want to have killed, baby? Sing it, boy. I'll get into my seven league boots. I'll get into my bulletproof boots. I'll get out my revolver. That's huge. Rattata-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta down there. Go. Have you got any mortgages you'd like to have paid, baby? Swing it, Andy. Have you got any billings that you want to have laid to raise? After all my adventures are through. Can't you bring home a dragon or two? You can tell all the papers that I did it because. I love you! Well, that was great. You're sure hot tonight, Andy. Thanks, Buck. Now, how about playing a violin solo? Oh, no, no, no. Anyway, Andy, I haven't got my fiddle. I'll get you a fiddle from the orchestra. All right, if you insist. I want some cider. Quiet. Here's a violin, Buck. I don't know if it's in tune or not. Oh, I'll get along all right. I think I'll get along, too. Good night, folks. You stay right here. Now, I'll play another course of the same thing. Wait, I want to get tuned up first. All right, well, boys, one more course of the same thing and swing it. Then I'll give a concert and a zoo. Even high-fests would have had trouble here. Well, let's have a dance. Play, boys. Come on. Here's a grand, new dessert that you'll want to try tomorrow. It's a track even that's mighty delicious. It's called Jell-O-O-Mode, and it's one of the nicest desserts we've ever told you about. You can make it with either strawberry or raspberry Jell-O. Dissolve the Jell-O in hot water. Turn into a shallow pan and chill until firm. Then cut the Jell-O into shimmering little cubes and pile in sherbet glasses. Pop each glass full of these Jell-O cubes with a small mound of vanilla ice cream. Believe me, you'll have a dessert to cheer about. Luscious, full-flavored Jell-O, crimson strawberry or rich glowing raspberry, topped off with vanilla ice cream. But you must use genuine Jell-O if you want that extra-rich fruit flavor. That deep, true fruit goodness which makes every Jell-O dessert so grand. No other Jell-Oton dessert brings you Jell-O's extra-rich fruit flavor. So always ask for Jell-O by name. Look for the big red letters on the box. They spell Jell-O. Night, folks. Good night. Maxwell House Coffee for grand. Good news of 1938. Begins next Thursday night, November 4th, over most of these same stations. It's a full-hours visit to the great MGM Lodge with Hollywood's most famous stars. See your local paper for time and station nearest you and be sure to tune in. The tune Blue Bonnet heard on this program is from the Casino Show and from the Pan American Exposition. Kenny Baker has appeared on this program with the courtesy of Mervyn Leroy. This is the national broadcasting company.