 And now we're going to have a discussion on a thick topic. Welcome, Sheikh. Salam alaikum, Sheikh. Wa alaikum, Salam wa rahmatullah. How are you today? How are you doing this morning? Alhamdulillah. Thank you very much. Are you ready for our question? Insha'Allah, insha'Allah. Thank you so much. So this morning, Brother Valali could read the question out. All right, no problem. So, Sheikh, we have a question from an anonymous viewer and it reads, there is a brother that I really would like to marry but he is the wrong color in my parents eyes and is a widower with a young child who is two years older than me. How important is it for me to receive my father's blessings? My father will never give his blessings as he is being impossible and I don't want to marry anyone else. I make my own money and I'm 31 years old and this is from, as I said, a sister in the UK who, not a my sister in the UK. There is a lot of sections to this question, Sheikh. Help us out, help us out. Help her out, really? Yeah, indeed. Someone's the wrong color, I don't know what the right color is. Yeah, I actually wanted to understand, I don't understand what's the meaning of wrong color. What's that, by the way? I don't know. Because Allah is the best of all colors, right? Indeed. Allah created all the colors, so I don't know the wrong, the right, but... Indeed. There is no right, wrong color. Yeah. Not in Islam, but maybe, she did specify in her dad's eyes. Maybe, maybe. But maybe to start our morning in a positive note, here maybe wrong color is an expression maybe they use at their house to say someone who is not fitting within their kind of understanding. However... And that could be, actually, a wrong color in terms of it could be sort of an Asian family with even a white person or, you know, it doesn't matter which color they're saying, it's just not inappropriate anyway. That's... Indeed, indeed. And maybe just to add to that, Islam doesn't encourage the idea of racism because if you look at the life of the holy Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa alayhi wa sallam, you could see him with his companions from all over the world, if I can say. Yeah. And Imams of Ahlu al-Bayt, alayhi mus'alam, not only that their companions were from different ethnicities, but even they married, some of them are imma, alayhi mus'alam, and they themselves had features of people who are not from Makkah in Medina, for example, Africans, and you have ladies from Africa who are married by imams, alayhi mus'alam. So Islam doesn't entertain the issue of color because of colors, marriage can't happen. That's very wrong. And maybe to say that someone as a parent, as a father or mother, if they have this idea and notion that we will marry our children only to a certain people from certain background because of color, then they are committing haram because this racism is haram in Islam. So what does a child do where we're taught to respect our parents and we need their blessings, we need their daughters, and they're saying, okay, this person's, I mean, it could be anybody, I mean, Arab, non-Arab community, and everyone is precious about their own community. So what is a child's responsibility that the parents are committing a haram, as you just said? So what can that child do in the context? There is a saying, and according to some scholars, they say it is hadith or principle in terms of understanding Islamic law, which says, la toa'ata limakhloukin fee maasiyatil khalik. La toa'ata, there is no obedience limakhloukin for any human being fee maasiyatil khalik. If that obedience will go against the obedience of Allah, you are not allowed to obey someone. If your obedience will make you to go against the obedience of Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. So any child who is, for example, forced to marry someone in a haram way, and this is to go against Allah's orders, then that kind of obedience is haram. Yes, I understand maybe because of the question here. I need to obey my parents. That's good. But if you are obeying your parents for you to disobey Allah, you need to bring Allah fast before your parents, because this is what Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala wants us to do. So in terms of marry, will it be haram if this particular individual decides to marry without the blessings of the father or blessings of the mother? Of course, the marriage will be okay. But she's not been, it sounds as if she's not being married before or she's 31 and she makes her own money. Does she need her father's permission? Is she seen as Rashida or how does it play out? Yeah, very important issue here. There are many issues as you said. Number one, the idea that any girl in order for him, for her to be married, she needs blessings. She needs willaya of the parents, of the father or grandfather and so on and so forth. Nowadays, yes, we understand this principle is there. La nikaha illa biwali. There is no any marriage which will take place for a girl except by through the permission of her father. So the willaya, the authority of a father, authority of grandfather if they are Muslims needs to be looked into. However, if we look at modern day's life where a girl, for example, reaches the age where she can support herself. In this case, this particular individual can support herself. Most of our marriage, they say, if she can support herself, she doesn't even need the willaya of the parents here. Why? Because sometimes they may want something which she does in one and it may cause trouble after the marriage also. So she is matured enough, she can agree on, she can decide whatever she wants to do in her life. Of course, there are issues of achlak which needs to be looked at. For example, after the marriage, how and what kind of relationship will be between the husband and the in-laws? The children and their grandparents. So this needs to be looked at. But in terms of committing haram, there's no any haram here if she decides to marry. Yeah. That's good. That's a good start in point. So in terms of the marriage itself, I think probably people feel guilty that they want to upset their parents and they are so precious to us. Is there an effect on the marriage's blessings in the future, do you think, if she is maybe that's part of what her dream is? Yeah, if we talk about blessings in terms of Rida, many children may stop to decide for their own future of their lives because of this idea of we want the blessings of the parents. But the blessings of the parents need to look at their well-being of the children. In this case, this girl here, if she says, well, I fear I may not have the blessings of my parents, so I have to abide by their blessings and so on and so forth, we need to say that the happiness is here, the happiness which will accompany this lady is very important. If in this case she's matured enough and she has come to a point of thinking that this is the man I need to spend the life with, it is my happiness which I need to look at. It is me who is going to live with this particular individual, not my parents, so she needs to kind of try to talk to the parents to convince them. If eventually it comes to a standstill where- Loggerhead, no movement. Loggerhead, no movement, it is her decision which needs to be looked at. She can involve Maulana, Sheikh and scholars to help her, but if she decides to go on with the marriage, the idea of blessings will cause trouble to my marriage, it's not there within Islam. What about the fact that her potentially, her stepdaughter will be her senior by two years? I don't know if it's even a fake issue, but if you could just comment on that, because it's not common that you marry somebody with a child and the child is older than you, but is it bad, good, I don't know, I don't know. It depends if you can say what kind of preparation she has decided to prepare in order for her to enter into this kind of relationship. However, Islam doesn't say it is Haram because there's a daughter who is of this age, no problem at all. And sometimes it happens that the relationship between this particular lady, for example, and that particular child may become a very strong kind of bond. It could work both ways, right? Because if they're the same age group, one could feel jealous and there's a rivalry, or it could become like sisters because they got a lot in common because they're from the same generation, so you just don't know the person that is match. It could be really helpful. Yeah, sure. So she needs to prepare the ground and to say that this is what I'm going to work in order for us to live a happy life together. And in terms of Halal Haram, Islam allows it. It is Mubah to enter into that kind of relationship. This is known as permissible. The permissibility is there, so there's no any issue with that. Excellent. I think we have a caller on line one. Salamu alaykum. Said Ali, you have a question for the share? Yes, Salam alaykum. My name is Said Ali and... Wa alaykum salam. I'm a Sayyid and my parents want me to marry a Sayyid girl. In fact, they've rejected the ritual women due to the fact that they're not Sayyids. And it's been very hard for me. And I was wondering, I mean, is this allowed? You know, can I go against their wishes? Thank you very much. Thank you. Thank you. Subhanallah. This is an ongoing issue. It's very tough. Yeah, this is one of those tough issues. Thank you very much, Said Ali. Number one, are you allowed to marry non-Sayyid? What would you look at the life of the imam, alaihi salam, to get all the evidences? There you are. If we talk about Sunnah of the Holy Prophet, Sunnah of Ima, alaihi salam, they are Sunnah. They married people from their families, or what you call relatives, as well as outside. And most of the time they married outside, they are clans. Clans, yeah, yeah, yeah. Can I intercept that? Yeah, sure. So my family are also Sayyid. Okay. And we have this issue. We have had it. So one of the things that was brought up as a justification for Sayyid girls not to marry out is the fact that imam, alaihi salam, had 17 daughters who weren't married. Okay. Because there were no suitable Sayyid men. Has this been proven that imam, alaihi salam, said, I'm not going to marry my children to non-Sayyids? Can we get a statement from imam, alaihi salam? Or is it something which we say to qualify whatever understanding is there? I can challenge this. No, any imam would say, I'm not going to marry my children. They will die without husband because there's no suit there. There's no Sayyid there. No, imam, alaihi salam, he married his girls to many who are not Sayyids. Imam Hassan, al-Mujtaba, Imam Hussain, alaihi salam, all of them. So for us to bring our own narrow understanding into the major issues of religion, I think this is wrong. We look at the lives of our Maraji now, now, our Maraji, these are our scholars. You go to their Makatib offices, you will see and you will hear that this particular individual has married a daughter of this Sayyid. So it's not something which you can say it is haram, we are not supposed to do that. Rasulullah Muhammad, sallallahu alaihi wa alayhi wa sallam says clearly, If someone attacks you, if someone attacks you, if someone attacks you, if someone attacks you, if someone attacks you, if someone attacks you, if someone attacks you, if someone comes to you to extend a hand of marriage to you and you are happy with two things, religion as well as morality, achlak, marry him to your daughters. And then he says, illam tafalu aw illa tafalu, takun fitna wa fasadun kabir. If you are not going to do that, there will be two things, fitna and fasad, fasad corruption, fitna we know fitna. There will be calamities. And today men- Seen this Sheikh, we see it. This has come true. Indeed. This is hadith from Maasum, the holy prophet Muhammad sallallahu alaihi wa sallam. Our sisters suffer because why? There is no any Sayyid to marry them. So Sayyid Ali, if he doesn't find a Sayyid sister, Sayyid Ali will die without marrying. Or he'll marry someone who may not have religion or morality. His parents will be happy. And that's another point. Imam Zayn al-Abideen alaihi sallam says, clearly Imam Zayn al-Abideen. According to this, which is known as hadith al-Qudsi, al-Jannahu haqqun liman ata'ani wa lawkaana abdan habashiya, wa naaru haqqun liman aswani wa lawkaana Sayyidan qarashiya. Paradise will be the right of a person who obeys Allah to enter into paradise, even though that person is a slave from habasha, from Ethiopia, from Africa. Paradise is right because he obeys Allah. Hell is the right of anyone who disobeys Allah even if he's a chief from Quraish. So we have these understandings which are from our a'ima alaihi sallam. You know what? Religion will be easy so long as we practice it according to Rasulullah and a'ima alaihi sallam. It will be difficult for us if we bring our own understanding. And I don't know why people have come nowadays to say, well, there's no marriage between Sayyids and non-Sayyids. This is from us, not from Rasulullah, not from a'ima alaihi sallam. Islam is clean, pure. Let us practice it in its purity and then we'll find. Absolutely. And I think, you know, you've explained it so eloquently that if we had, we observed the teachings of Ahubayah, the holy prophet, how they lived and lives would be more enriched and perhaps he wouldn't see this increased divorce rate. He followed those paths of religion and piety and morality rather than looking at the superficial factors that may not make us happy. Which leaders, Fitna and Fasaad. Fitna and Fasaad, Akhir, there are many, many sisters nowadays. They reached the age of about 40. Nobody's marrying them. Why? Because there's no Sayyid here. There's no someone from our clan. You know what will happen eventually? So even this Sayyid has to come from this particular village and that Sayyid has to come from this particular family. Where can we find it? Islam is the religion of all mankind. And Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala, you know what? Universality, if we talk about universality of Islam, Allah is universal because he's Rabbul Alameen. Rabbul Alameen cannot segregate between the people. Rasulullah came to practice that religion. A'ima alaihi sallam. When we talk about the Imam of our time, that he will have people who will follow him 313. Do we want to say that all of them will be Sayyids? No, absolutely not. Thank you so much. And we have time for Sayyid Ali and our original, both permissible for them to marry. I mean, shall we marry for the good reasons, the right reasons. Thank you so much again. Most welcome. And shall we see you another morning? As-santum, Shukran, JazakAllah. And so up next, nutrition and a healthy heart. So we hope to see you after the morning.