 This is Ronald Coleman, inviting you to join Mrs. Coleman and me for the next half hour when our sponsor, the Joseph Schlitz Brewing Company of Milwaukee, Wisconsin, presents the Halls of Ivy. That's the beer that made Milwaukee famous. Schlitz tastes so good to so many people that it's the largest-selling beer in America. It has to be fine to be first. Old Triple A. We used to call him, Vicky. Old triple A, Alan. I suppose he was the best ... Vicky, Alan is a nice name, a good name, but how is it useful? Oh, sorry, I was thinking in triplication. Oh, well, he was the best half, but you were thinking in what? Triplicate, darling, and I suppose his name had been Vernon. Old triple V, very something, Vernon. It's not used. Well, anyway, Alan was the best halfback I've ever had. Fine class president and a brilliant valedictorian. He had the, um, the... Harry, eh? The other shoe, Vicki, what would you do with Harry? Happy halfback, Harry. That's all. He had the magic touch. Whatever he did, he did a little better than anybody else, and he never strutted. He was good, and he knew it, and that was that. Do I detect a slight case of hero worship? Probably. I was his best friend. And hero worship is not a bad thing when you're young. It simulates the emulation of ideals and character and action. By the time one's old enough to know that, uh, honesty is the best, et cetera, and crime doesn't, you know what, well, it's a little late to start reshaping one's own character. So hero worship, by setting up early standards of behavior, provides a shortcut through experience. Let's look at hop along Cassidy. You look at hop along Cassidy. You raise your own posthum, and I'll meet you at the hiding. Ah, the language of hero worship. Hop along is the square shooter in Karnat, the champion on the White Horse. Yes, the instinct of American children is pretty sound when they select a hero who is quick on the draw for justice. All of a sudden, excuse me darling, are you writing a letter? Oh no, no, I was just taking notes. You may want to use those cogent little observations again some time. Oh, oh. Now, um, where were we? Oh yes, yes. Triple A records the old American boy. His name's Speedy Hall. His name's Speedy, but exactly the same reason the bald-headed man is named Curly. And the village fat boy is called Shadow. Is it the charming perversity of our national humor? Oh, you're just being modest. I do suppose that Alan Richard has changed much. I wonder. Twenty years can be either kind or cruel to a man like Alan. Personally, I think he'd have taken time by the fall-up and no nonsense about it. Well, there's your chance to find out. All right, come on, begin this former reception line to welcome an old friend. Howdy, folks. Wow. Hey, Calhoun. Howdy. Come in, Calhoun. Come in. I just come visiting. Well, I'm sorry. I missed you this morning. Oh, you didn't miss me, miss, all. I missed you. My hens had them eggs all laid out for pretty for you, but I had to high-tail it to make my morning classes. And all day long I've been busier in a shelf with a cut snail. Here you are, ma'am. See you next week. Thank you. I'm sure our daddy's situation wasn't that desperate. Tomorrow would have been soon enough. Well, sir, I don't take the post phone and spend pile-up on you. First thing you know, you got to do everything at once. And you generally get to it around supper time on Loon's Day. Oh, well, I have the money to ask you, Calhoun. Have you heard from your wife? Now, how's the new baby? Well, Uncle Lation wrote to me, he said that both Lori and Wellie are just doing fine. Well, really? I didn't know your name didn't yet. Oh, didn't I tell you? No. Well, now, that was unthoughtless of me. Especially when I should have asked you first. See, it was a toss-up between Ike for Isaac Walton and Henry for Thorough. And then I got me a new idea. But Lori thought that I ought to ask you for permission. Calhoun, a college president may assume unlimited authority, but his real jurisdiction is confined to the campus. It's not necessary to get his approval to name babies. Or have them, for that matter. Todd Hunter again. Don't change your mind now, Doc, because he's been bad-died. Legal. Uncle Lation wrote that they already throwed the water on him. I'll do my best to live up to it. Oh, you've already done your part, Doc. Now it's up to that little video feather. Got something to live up to itself. Excuse me, Calhoun. I'll get it, Vicki. That'll be Alan. Oh, you having company for dinner, Miss Hall? Oh, yes. Old friend, Doc, of all. Well, why didn't you say something? I could have just dropped my eggs and lit on that. Once I get to talking to you, I can even forgive you. At long last, this is Alan Richards. Victoria. This is Calhoun Gaddy. Hello, glad to meet you. Well, hey, do you know my son? Oh, of course I know your boy. We tried out for the same stage play at the campus playhouse. Oh, he is real good. He got the hero part. You know, hero? How did you come out? Well, I'm going to take off a grandpa part. You know, it's going to be kind of hard for me to do it. You know how them folks talk. See, he's a way down southern. I don't know whether I can get that accent. It's just like what that man Thoreau says. Don't be thrown off the track by every nut shell and mosquito's wing that falls on the rail. Well, good night, Thoreau. Good night. That's a nice guy, Bill. But isn't he a bit old to be a student here? Oh, he's one of our most promising freshmen. Yes, and with five children. Well, that's a story in itself. Alan, it's good to see you. How long has it been? How many years, Bill? Look, both of you, you have a lot to catch up. Why don't you sit down and take a deep breath and ring up the curtain on reunion in Ivy? I'll just be the lady at Penny's match. Oh, but Mrs. Hall, I want to hear all about you and Bill first. See, Junior hasn't shown up yet, has he? But wasn't he coming with you? Well, he was, but he had some mysterious appointment this afternoon, so we arranged to meet here. He'll be along in time for dinner. He said it would be a thrill to sit down at table with the president of Ivy. But he didn't have waited until his father came to town. We've asked him here a couple of times. Have you forgotten? It takes a freshman a little while to get used to a college president. Do you know him, Bill? No, but from all I've heard, he hasn't wasted any time. He signed up for practically all the freshman activities. You just had Calhoun. He's already won the lead in the class play. He seems to have inherited your talent for winning. Ah, but you haven't seen him on a football field. I saw you, Alan. If he's half as good and we have a couple more like him, Ivy's got the conference trophy in the bag next fall. Thanks for the memory, Bill. But it won't hold up against Junior. He's got real class. You know, with him here, it's almost as if I were back in Ivy. A kind of return engagement. That sort of duplicate to play. No. Junior will win his own medals. He doesn't need any help from me. I can't believe it. Me back at Ivy again. Oh, Cornie Thorny's still around? Cornie Thorny. He was retired ten years ago. Victoria Cornie Thorny was our endearing name for Professor Sondike. Sociology, one aim. And the world's greatest bore. Caught up on all my sleep in his class. Yeah. Don't think he wasn't onto us. I remember stopping in the middle of a lecture and saying, Ladies and gentlemen, I don't mind having you look at your watches to see what time it is, but it rarely annoys me when you put them up to your ears to see if they're still running. It makes just the same. Sorry to bother you. Good night. Oh, that's funny. Nobody's seen Junior at his fraternity house since early this afternoon. I don't know what's happened to his manners. He got tied up. The least he could have done was call. I'm going to chase him down. Oh, you're not leaving right away. Oh, yes, if you'll forgive me. Victoria, you've done a miraculous job on Bill. He's a strange man. Twenty years younger than back when I knew him. No, let me see. Twenty minus twenty. Oh, there. Doesn't leave much, does it? I think Alan and his whimsical manner were suggesting that through you, darling, I was reborn. And when I grow up, I hope I'll meet you again. That's a better exit speech than I could think of. Hope we can get together again before I leave. Good night, folks. Good night. Good night. Did it occur to anybody else that perhaps young Alan wasn't being ruled but it might be in some kind of trouble? It was written all over his father's face. I don't remember ever seeing him worried before. You never saw him as a father before? I know. Somehow I never expected him to play the role so zealously. But then, Vicki, his wife died shortly after the boy was born, so it's not too surprising that he's living his whole life over again in young Alan. He's maternal, paternal and fraternal all at the same time. You know, they look amazingly alike. We're not the better than... That's pretty late for calls. Dr. Hall speaking. Oh, Doctor. Oh, yes, yes, of course, yes. Just a moment, please. Vicki, who whom do we know in Waterford? Well, I don't even know Waterford. Where is it? It's a small town about fifty miles from here on the road to... Oh, I have, Doctor. You can reach him at his hotel in about ten minutes. We missed you at dinner, Alan. Naturally, your father wondered what had happened to you. Don't you think you'd better call him? His fraternity house again. Did he tell you why? I think the boy left his fraternity house this afternoon saying he never wanted to see his father again. I never heard of such a thing. And I'm going to try and find out where that boy is in Waterford. May I have long distance, please? Just a moment, please. This calls for a little detective work. A little spade work. Sam's spade work. Alan Richards in the town's only hotel. Gee, Doctor Hall, I feel terrible dragging Mrs. Hall all the way up here in the middle of the night. Oh, we just felt like taking a ride tonight, Alan. Since we happened to be in the neighborhood, we thought we'd drop in. A 50 mile drive? Yeah. Mrs. Hall, I want to apologize for not showing up for dinner tonight. I could have saved you a lot of trouble if I'd explained everything on the telephone. There are two people together in the room and much more likely to reach a mutual understanding than the same two people in the separate telephone booths. I've always said that it was significant that in a phone booth you don't see the light till after the door shuts. To observation, my darling. I suppose Dad's funny sore and I can't blame him. Well, I think he just puzzled. It doesn't matter a fact. He spent most of the evening talking about you. And if you ever need somebody to handle your public relations, he's your man. Well, that's one of the things I couldn't face, Mrs. Hall. I was afraid I'd crack up if I had to listen to Dad on the subject of me again. Well, it's a most important subject for him. He's naturally proud of you. Besides, he's back at Ivy all over again. Now that you're here. I know. That's just it. He's at Ivy, not me. Sure, I registered at colleges, Alan Richards Jr., but there's only one Alan Richards. You know that, Dr. Hall. Yes, and he said a high mark few to reach, I know. But that should be an incentive. An incentive you can't reach is just an obstacle. Dad was great in everything he did. He still is. So he doesn't know what the word failure means. All my life, he's assumed that I was just like him and therefore I had to be great. I couldn't stand it. He couldn't stand it either if I was a flop. You think you've been a flop? Well, I haven't been very good. I'm not my father. And if Dad ever stopped looking at me through his mirror, he'd call me a flop. Oh, isn't it a little earlier to make such a catechonical judgment of yourself? After all, you've just started here. Now, I can't fool Dad. Well, I just met your father for the first time tonight, but I didn't get the impression that he was breathing down your neck. He talked as though you were a free agent on your own. Well, maybe he thinks so. Oh, he never comes right out and insists that I've got to do anything. It's worse than that. Did he say anything about my not going out for spring football practice? No, as a matter of fact, he has great expectations for your results to a humpback. There you are. That's what I mean. I'm not sure he even heard me. I told him yesterday and he didn't say anything. He didn't even ask me why. Well, perhaps he was just leaving the decision up to you. And didn't want to say anything that might influence you one way or the other. Well, I'd like him better if he'd say something. Get sore, at least give me an argument. I tell you, he won't hear what he doesn't want to hear. He just freezes if he'd only fight with me. Why have you tried standing up to him? Yeah, I tried that when I was a kid. He just smiled, pat me on the back and say, oh, Junior, you know you can do it. What happens if you know you can't? I have a feeling you haven't told us everything, Alan. Well, there is something else. If Dad ever found out he'd yank me out of school and make a big production out of it and make it worse than it is, why not let us have the whole story? You'll feel better. It seems that I have a slightly enlarged heart. I can't go out for football. Spring football or any other kind. Nothing serious, but no contact sports. What makes you think your father wouldn't understand that? Oh, he'd understand, but in the wrong way. He'd be sorry and sympathetic, but he'd feel defeated. And you know, he can't ever lose. All right, then tell him what you want to. Make him accept it on your own terms. Tell him good and loud. The point after which stimulation reverses itself and becomes esophoritic. But if you push esophoritic to the extreme, it means to develop its own stimulus. You know, that's quite a terrifying idea. How do you feel about it? Terrified. I mean, I can't decide whether I'm esophoritic or a stimulus. Perhaps if I looked it up in the dictionary, no, no, I have a better idea. I'll kiss you good morning and you decide. Oh, that'd be lovely. Darling, press myself clearly enough. My all means tried again. Perhaps this time be my etymological research. Nothing that I can't pick up where I left off. Listen, I just found out why Alan didn't show up last night. Oh, did he come to see you this morning? No, I still haven't had the idea where he is. He must have gone off the deep end when Coach McPherson told him. You see, I called the coach this morning just to say hello and he told me Junior's got a bad heart and I've got to find him. He's all right. He promised to come to see you this morning. What? You know about this? Why didn't you tell me? The kid needs medical attention. I'll take him to New York with me and get a specialist. He won't do as specialist he needs. Yes, that's just what he said you'd want to do. But I don't think that's the cure, Alan. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. When did you talk to Junior? Last night, after you left. You mean he came to you and not to me? No, we went to him. We found out that he had driven up to Waterford so we paid him a visit. He must have gone all to pieces when he found out about his heart. It's not his heart he's worried about. It's yours. He's afraid you'll feel sorry for him and it's somehow you'll consider him a failure. Well, that's ridiculous. What kind of a monster does he think I am? Oh, he thinks you're wonderful. But that's because you've always been such a success and he's scared to death to make a mistake. It must be my fault, but I don't know where I was wrong but which isn't really a question of false talent. It's just that you and your son aren't really acquainted. You've been introduced but you haven't met. What do you mean by that? Well, you've never seen your boy face to face. All your life you've been looking at him over your shoulder. You've been trying to make him into a future which is a projection of your own past and he's been trying to follow a path that was already beaten out for him. He's been going your way, Alan. Maybe now he wants to go his own. But I've never opposed him. Try sometime. At least you'll know for once exactly where you stand. He's always done everything he wanted to do. Do you have any idea of what he wants to do? I, of course. He's always... Why? It's just... Well... No, Bill, as a matter of fact, he's never said, I guess I've done all the talking. Is that it? Only part of it. You could have done even more talking if you'd done some listening. No, maybe you're right. But where do we go from here? We'll make him tell you the truth. That's a pretty big order, Bill. For you, Alan. Remember those razzle-dazzle plays you used to call when you were running the team? Well, maybe I did. But I always made the most yardage right down the middle. Hey! Why didn't I think of that? Will you get it, Toddy? Yes, of course. I want to make a fresh pot of coffee. I know Alan hasn't had breakfast yet. Morning, Dr. Hall. Hello, Alan. I missed out at his hotel but they told me he was coming over here. Come on in. Hey, wait a minute. Before I see him, I found a lot about what you said last night and you're probably right. But I don't know that I... So you've finally turned up, eh? Hello, Dad. I come a thousand miles to see you. We have a fast ten minutes together. I make a date for us with my best friends and we spend the entire evening wondering whether you're dead or alive. And you say hello, Dad, as if nothing's happened. You know, I'm sorry about not showing up last night. I don't know anything. Where were you? What happened? There was so important you couldn't even call. I tried to get you here but you'd left. You knew I was at the hotel? What's the matter? Didn't you have another nickel? I changed my mind. It was too late to talk to you. It wasn't too late to drag the halls out in the middle of the night. I waited a minute, Dad. I didn't ask anybody to drive all that way to see me. Why did you run away in the first place? I just didn't want to see you. That's all. That's great. That explains everything. At least I'm glad you're honest. But why didn't you tell me that before? Well, I wouldn't have done any good. You wouldn't have heard me. You never heard me like yesterday and I tried to tell you I wasn't going out for football. I heard you all right. Well, why didn't you say something? Because you didn't give me a good reason for dropping football. Well, I have plenty of reasons. The first one is I'm no good at it. Oh, you're trying to kid. I've seen you play. Oh, why do I have to have reasons? I just don't want to go out for football. That's all. I love Junior. And when are you going to drop that Junior? Junior means carbon copy and I don't want to be a carbon copy. I don't want to be page one of the second edition. Well, why not see so then? And why haven't you told me these things before? I've started two lots of times and you weren't listening. Cheers to the crowd seemed to have deafened you a little. Hey, wait a minute, Junior. I mean, Alan. I guess we do have some talking to do. I guess I never did hear you before. Well, so you're Alan Richards. I'm glad to meet you too, Dad. One time, North Sea. Eye to eye. How do you like that, Bill? It's taken me 19 years to get introduced to my own son. Well, Alan, sometimes people spend a whole lifetime without knowing anybody. Tonight, you've met your son and what's more important, you've met yourself. And now with 19 years of talking to do, I'm sure you too will excuse me. I think I'd better go and see if Victoria has fallen into the coffee pot. She often does. I was on my way back in with a refreshment but I thought I'd better wait until time out. Well, I think the game is just about over, Vicky. Yeah, who's winning? Everybody. I'm sure it'll end up in a lovely tie that even Countess Mara might envy. Oh, God. It is strange, Toddy, how sometimes you have to tear people apart to get them back together again. Nature helped in this case. Well, nature plus a shot of adrenaline from Dr. Hall. Vicky, in my years as an observer of youngsters and their families, I found nothing more heartwarming than a fine father-and-son relationship. I suppose I've seen all the variations of Oedipus, Electra, and Silvercord problems. And every father should know what Alan Richards learned tonight. That the father who faces the son will never be confused by his own shadow. The beer that made Milwaukee famous. People like the taste of Schlitz than any other beer. That's why Schlitz is the largest selling beer in America. The National Society for Crippled Children. This great service cares for handicapped little ones who really need your help. Buy and use Easter Seals for, by so doing, you not only support a great cause, but remind others of a way in which they too can contribute. Buy Easter Seals and help the Crippled Children. And here again, our Mr. and Mrs. Ronald Coleman. Good night, everyone. Good night. Good night. Good night, Henry Russell. The Halls of Ivy was created by Don Quinn, directed by Nat Wolfe, and presented by the Milwaukee, Wisconsin, Ken Coventry speaking.