 All the marriage laws in India, whether it is the Hindu Marriage Act, Muslim Marriage Act, Special Marriage Act or any other, state that when two consulting adults want to be married, no third party can interfere. But the conditions are not so simple in practice. In Tamil Nadu, especially couples who married outside their cast report unpleasant experiences at the hands of government officers while registering their wedding. The intercast couples feel that the government officers are taking a casteist attitude towards them. Instead of following legalities, it is said that unofficial regressive internal protocols are followed, which overrule the law. Moreover, many intercast marriages are denied registration by the officers citing futile executions. Here are two intercast couples who are married earlier this year in February and June, sharing their experiences with us. And we went to the sub-registers office in Nilangurai to register our wedding according to every other rule that was mentioned in the website. So we had taken our friends who were witnesses of the wedding and it was five of us who had gone to the registration office that day. And we had taken all the required documents, including photographs of the wedding and also our other card and other details. They had asked us to come on that particular day and we had submitted the documents in front of the sub-register office and they just looked at us and they said, where are your parents? We had come to the intercast marriage and we were invited to attend our wedding. There was no reason for us to wait for so long. When we asked them what is the need for them, they said that they would wait for another hour and they said that they would wait for another hour and they said that they would wait for five and a half hours from four to six o'clock. So when we asked them to take the documents from the sub-register office, they asked us what is the need for them to take the documents from the sub-register office. Only after that and then he said, there is a problem with the registration itself, the application itself. So he cannot register it and he gave us a refusal letter saying that it's suspicious whether the wedding happened at all because the two of us called ourselves atheists and we did not submit any document for being atheists. Sir, I ask that how come you being atheists can happen, a marriage happen in a temple and with a custom and belief. We are quoted saying that this can be considered as a self-respect marriage. In self-respect marriage, there is no restriction that there should be Hindu tradition to be followed or not or if your parents have belief and you don't have belief if you follow certain customary practices, it should be part of it or not. That is part of the, that is the amendment which has been brought in Hindu marriage act, that is applicable for Tamil marriage registration act also. But when officially going, we have to make a decision for a Tamil marriage registration act. For that, I made a decision for a five Tamil marriage registration act and I was thinking about what to do with it. They are asking, what is this, have you seen it? This is color gel ice. Yes, it is color gel ice. According to my self-respect, I can only do that much. We can make a five-dollar registration act, we can make a five-dollar love and guards act, that is the self-respect for me. Some of my friends who wanted to go for inter-caste marriages, even I know- sir is in our University and he has a lot of opportunities to interact with us. He is very good at that. But he has a lot of opportunities. He is very, very good at that. And he has a lot of opportunities. He knows a lot of things that we are doing here. He knows a lot of things that we are doing that we are not doing here. wanted to go for intercourse marriages, even I know some progressive friends with both this DIFE, SFA and all. When they are approaching the registered officers for registering their marriages, the parents of the spouses are compelled to be witnessing the parents and they want to sign the forms in terms of witnesses by the parents themselves. Though there is no return surplus, but there is an unproclaimed circular from upper hands saying that these conditions should be fulfilled for registering the Hindu marriages, where the act never says that this should be done. It is against the Hindu marriage act, clauses of the Hindu marriage act. I am viewing this as a feudalistic point of view. So, though we state that under article 14 of our Indian constitution, we have the right to life. Our rights are being curtailed in the name of this unproclaimed circular stating that we have to bring up parents, especially when it comes for this Hindu marriage, they want to portray the caste. When it comes for especially the intercourse marriages, they want to portray the caste and they are asking us to bring up parents. None of the parents are willing to go for intercourse marriages. Even this condition, I don't know why the government is imposing such an unproclaimed circular and preventing the spouses from getting married when they are interested in getting along with the intercourse marriages. Even though the acts, even the Hindu marriage act or the special marriage act or any Tamil Nadu marriage act doesn't have any provision to bring the parents, but registers, by merely some guidelines which have been issued over the act by the inspector general of register, they are just following that act or they have produced the approach that people who are coming for marriage registration may be of intercourse marriages or interreligious marriages and they need to stop that prejudice the attitudes of the registers also getting reflected in that registration of the acts. When they show their authority, they will be able to identify the people who are going to come for marriage registration. They will be able to identify the people who are going to come for marriage registration. Even if the Tamil Nadu marriage is done for intercourse marriages, there are many other places where there are still murders going on. We have been seeing that every morning. Now there are such unproclaimed acts of intercourse marriages that the parents are unable to do. If parents are unable to do it, there is a murder going on here. We are getting married with the permission of the parents. We are getting married by calling all the relatives. We are not able to identify the people who are going to come for marriage registration. Nowhere in our life we are asked to bring our parents for any proof or anything. We make our decisions right. So why is it that parents have to be there only for the registration of a marriage and especially the women's parents as if we don't we can't make our choices of our own and what if we end up making choices which our parents don't agree for my fortunately for us our parents were there in our wedding but there are hundreds of people who make choices which are more progressive and which are against their parents. The refusal letter which was provided by register states that about guidelines issued by inspector general of register on 2014 and that guidelines were never available to public okay public were never aware of it and the public were it's not even available in the public and it's merely a guideline given to the registers to be followed and it's a customary office related guideline and the register quoted from that guideline to reject our marriage. He has not quoted something from the act or something from the proof we have submitted. He quoted from an internal office guidelines issued by the inspector general of register to the respective just as that has been quoted here and this when we refer even there is an order from the courts also that the guidelines or any thing from any such matters which been issued by for official purposes or office purposes cannot overrule the act act is the predominant okay act is the base any registration should act be registered as per the act guidelines is it's unlawful we are a little bit aware of certain things we were able to take the next steps we are trying to approach to see himself we are trying to take up the help of lawyers public opinion makers and activists who have been already doing the intercast marriages and registrations and all we are dating the help of them we are trying to find a solution how to get it registered but people who are not aware of anything who still have a wish of getting getting their love marriage or intercast marriage to be registered how what hardship they undergo under this unlawful guidelines issued by inspector general of Tamil Nadu. We have Bharatiyaar, we have Ambedkar, we have Periyar. Every each and every single soul was what is that campaigning for this intercast marriages and the progressive sorts of life in this world but I don't know why this Tamil Nadu I don't have gone back almost 50 years back here by claiming these sort of witnesses for registering Hindu marriages. Whereby they are indirectly showing or portraying this intercast this casteism if spouses are ready what they have witnessed or what they have underwent in SROs and they are ready to give an affidavit to me I am ready to file a case before the honorable high court quoting all these things and we can find a solution through appropriate courts of law.