 Dedicated to the strength of the nation, we hail the starring Broderick Crawford in Surrealist Love, United States Army and United States Air Force Presentation. And now here is our producer, the well-known Hollywood showman, C.P. McGregor. Thank you, thank you, and greetings from Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to your Theatre of Stars, where Hollywood's finest talent from the stage and screen join us in plays we know you'll enjoy. Our star is that famous actor of Broadway and Hollywood, Broderick Crawford. And the title of our play, Surrealist Love, a story of romance and sparkling comedy. We'll have the curtain for act one of Surrealist Love in just a moment. But first, here's our announcer with a message of importance. Only the best can be aviation cadets. And if you can qualify and are selected, you will receive the finest pilot training for us. To qualify, you must be between the ages of 20 and 26 and one-half. You may be either married or single. You must be able to pass an equivalent except thorough training. You will win your silver wings and receive a reserve commission in the United States Air Force. Apply tomorrow at your nearest Air Force Base or U.S. Army and U.S. Air Force Recruiting Station. And remember, only the best can be aviation cadets. And now once again, our producer. The curtain rises on act one of Surrealist Love starring Broderick Crawford as Joe Gleason. Joe Gleason, the new pastry cook at the hotel to the cute little waitress named Mamie. But as yet, he hasn't had much success. Mamie has set her sights on bigger games on a next GI who's sold little lunch counter. But, Mamie... For the whole? I told you before, cooks. I'm gonna marry... You don't have to marry me. Just look all I'm asking for is a date. Just to the movies or something. I know. I know. But what about... I'll tell you. The moon is shining. We walk through the park. You hold my hand. What's... How am I gonna remember I got to marry a rich guy when a good-looking guy like you tries to kiss me in the moonlight? Oh, gosh, Mamie. I'll promise not to try to kiss you if that'll make you change your mind. What did that do to my self-confidence? I think I... So let me kiss you. Yeah. That's right. I wouldn't have to. Well, would I? I know what the moonlight does to me, Joe. Just thinking about it makes me forget my dream man. What's this... What's this dream guy like? He's got a million dollars. For almost a million. I ain't asking you how much he's got. I'm asking you what he's like. Well, what's the difference what he's like? I can always close my eyes when I kiss him. Oh, you make me sick. The same to you and many of them. I can always tell when you're mad, Joe. You always tear off some of that butcher paper and start taking pictures with frosting. Yeah, and this time I'm gonna paint a picture of that dream man he was. First his head, now his body. Oh, you got him all out of proportion. That great big head and that funny little body. That shows what you know about art. This here is a new kind of art. It's a realist. That's what they call it. Gala hat. It still looks screwy to me. And not a chocolate frosting. We'll paint his hair and a nice mustache. Oh, mustaches are out of date. So are rich millionaires. They're old and bald. Like this. Oh, Joe, that's horrible. Even with my eyes closed, I couldn't kiss a guy that looked like that. Oh, my gosh, I forgot about that guy's coffee. I'd better run. What about our date? Hey, Mamie, Mamie! What's the matter, sir? What's happened? What's happened? What's happened? Will you please explain, sir? We'll try to make it right, whatever it is. It's abominable, that's what it is. Here I've had my soup, or I've discovered... discovered what, sir? A fly? Oh, right in my soup? Oh, I might have swallowed him. The very thought of it makes me ill. Please calm down, sir. We're sorry, but we'll certainly rectify the matter. Waitress, bring this man another bowl of soup. No, no, no, no. I couldn't touch it. I couldn't touch it. I'd very much doubt if I could ever eat anything else prepared in this hotel. But a thing like this could happen anywhere. As a matter of fact, we have the cleanest kitchen in the city. You hear that? After this ghastly experience, I'd have to see it to believe that. We'd be very glad to have you see it, sir. Oh, you would. You'd be very glad to have me. Well, I think I'll take you up on that. But mind you, if I do go through your kitchen, can I see anything at all untidy about it? I shall report you to the health department. This way, please. Here, right through the swinging door. Oh, excuse me, mister. Oh, sir. I'm very sorry, sir. Oh, you're sorry. Well, I should think so. Why don't you look where you're going? Why don't you go where you're looking? Here, I'll wipe the soup off your coat. The soup? Oh, this is the last straw. Absolutely the last straw. I shall certainly withdraw my patronage from this hole. There. It'll dry in a few minutes. Come on over here and stand by the oven. It'll dry before you know it. Thanks, Mamie. I'll leave him to you. But care of him, Mamie. What happened, Mamie? Well, this guy... What happened? What happened? This young lady only tried to give me a shower with the soup. That's what happened. I never was so exasperated in all my life. But how did I know you'd be coming through that swinging door? Customers don't usually come back here. I came to inspect your kitchen. What's the matter with my kitchen? That's what I came to find out. I got a fly in my soup. No. I've got to go back to the customer's gel. You see that his soup gets dropped. Okay, Mamie. So you got a fly in your soup? I did. I almost swallowed it, too. Don't tell me. It makes me positively ill. You're making me shudder. So I decided to inspect this kitchen to see if it conforms to the laws of health. That's a good idea. Just have a gander. Just take a look. Oh, my. Oh, my. My stars and goddess. That picture. Don't let that guy scare you. He's just something I dreamed up to scare Mamie. You mean... You mean that you painted this? Sure. My good man, let me touch you. Oh, this is the most perfect example of surrealist art that I have ever seen. And I am an authority. It is? I'm reading Dynamic Symmetry. What? What do you call it? Yes, your title. Every picture has a title. Oh, well... I call it the... The Awful Rival. Oh, how interesting. What is that new medium you've painted with? New medium? Yes, it isn't watercolor. It isn't oil. Oh, you mean the stuff I painted the picture with? Yes, it has its delicate color. It's sort of three-dimensional. One might say. Might one? Yes, I'm sure it's something you worked out for yourself. Some little secret? Yeah, yeah, that's it. Oh, you will make a fortune, my man. A fortune? I am positively enraptured with this work. Are you kidding? No, don't be facisious there. No need for false modesty. When may I see some of your other work? What other work? I must see all of them. And if they're as good as this piece, I'll arrange for you to exhibit them at the museum. And your fortune will be made. My fortune? Oh, Mamie. You haven't answered my question. When may I see your other work? Oh, yeah, yeah. I'll tell you what I'll do. Thursday's my day off. Now, you come to my house Thursday night. I'll have plenty for you to see. Hurry, Mamie. We got to think up titles for all of them before the guy gets here. Titles? Are they kings or queens or something? Mamie, you don't understand. Every picture like this has got to have a name. Why? I don't know, so they can tell what it is, I guess. But you don't know what half of them are yourself, do you? No, but I figured they must look like something, and between the two of us, we ought to be able to figure something out. Well, this one looks sort of like a fried egg. Maybe we could call it the egg and I. That's a movie. We've got to be more original. I know. Let's call it Son in Smog. Hey, that's real poetical. What'll we call this day? Let's call her, uh, the Twisted Soul. Oh, Joe, you're wonderful. If you only had money. You're telling me it. Say, Mamie, why are you so set on money? Because I don't like you to rob banks to get a main coat. Oh, hello, Joe. Hello, Horace. I thought I'd never get here. Just never get here. That taxi driver couldn't seem to find the street. You remember Mamie. Remember her? Could I ever forget her? I hope you've had some lessons, young lady, in balancing soup. Well, at least now I whistle before I come through a swinging door. But I must see the paintings. I've told my friends about you and they cannot wait to see your work. Well, here they are. Oh, please. Why, that is marvelous. That's absolutely marvelous. And all done in that new medium. Now, this one here. This one is called Sun in Smog. Sun in Smog? Well, I never saw anything like, oh, what a imagination. What feeling. What sweet rhythm. I still think it looks more like a fried egg. Stick to your soup, young lady. You obviously don't know art. And I suppose you do. Mamie, Mamie, uh, suppose you run out of time. Yes, dear, yes, dear. I just a door of tea. Now then, you must let me exhibit you over. Why, you will make a fortune. A fortune? Oh, boy. Good looks and money, too. We won't have to close my eyes. No, then just sign this agreement. Agreement? What does it say? Why, just that you agree to pay me 10% of the proceeds. For my trouble. Okay, that's fair enough. We'll put Sun in Smog right here. I still think it looks more like a fried egg. Never mind what you think, Mamie. The museum has it printed in the catalog Sun in Smog. That's what it's got to be. Okay. There, that does it. It's the last one. Say, the gold frames make them look real elegant? This mess before the newspaper boys get here. Oh, there's a fly on the awful rivals nose. I should have painted one on it. Looks natural, doesn't it? Anyway, half a dozen flies on them. Oh, Joe, look at the others. There are flies all over all the pictures. Oh, my gosh, it's the frosting. Close the windows quick. We'll have to do something, Joe. We can't have the pictures covered with flies. I'll go out and get some flyspray. That's what they use at the hotel. Oh, hurry, Joe. The exhibit is going to start in 10 minutes and we'll never get through. We pause briefly for my story, Cyrillus Gloves starring Broderick Crawford to bring you an important message from your government. Ladies and gentlemen, our Army and our Air Force are critically short of physicians and dentists. Over 2,000 volunteers from these two professions are urgently needed today to safeguard and care for the health of the First of the United States Army and United States Air Force are serving you and me at home and overseas. Young physicians and dentists, particularly those who did not serve in the armed services during World War II, have been asked by their government to contact now to volunteer for duty at once. If you are one of these young physicians or dentists, please write or wire either the Surgeon General of the United States Army or the Air Surgeon of the United States Air Force at once and volunteer your services. If you know one of these young physicians or dentists, please call his attention to this urgent message. Thank you.