 Shane Dawson and Rylin Adams just gave us a little sneak peek kind of an empty house tour of their brand new home. But while watching this I was thinking Shane Dawson really needs to start taking his own advice but this might also be something that you're struggling with too. What is up everybody? This is Chris from the Rewired Soul where we talk about the problem but focus on the solution and if you're new to my channel, my channel is all about mental health and what I like to do is pull different topics from the YouTube community to try to teach you how to improve your mental and emotional well-being. So if you're into that kind of stuff make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell because I make a ton, a ton of videos. All right but yeah anyways Shane Dawson, Rylin Adams, love him oh so much. So yesterday Rylin uploaded a video over on his channel of their empty house tour and towards the beginning Shane and Rylin were talking about their new house and then this clip happened. I just have to say this because I feel like I've always been this type of person that feels worried about this stuff but I just want to say number one this is not like some crazy whatever house this is like it's not it looks big but it really isn't that crazy especially with I just want to say that I'm working on YouTube for like 10 years or more and I've kind of always held back from you know getting my dream house because I felt like I wasn't ready but now I'm I'm excited and I don't want to feel like I'm showing off or bragging I feel like I'm doing like a Christmas unboxing video like I'm a guru like I'm not bragging this isn't to brag or anything I know that everybody says that you know what I mean but like it is kind of like this is what I've worked my whole life for yeah and when I was watching that it was just fascinating to me because when Shane Dawson first started this kind of new thing he was doing with his channel with these little docuseries back when they were only like three parts instead of eight parts um one of the first people he did this with was graveyard girl or bunny right and I remember I remember watching that and bunny not really wanting to show her house not really want to show the inside because she felt the same things that Shane Dawson was tell them explain to them yeah why you aren't talking about certain things and your reasonings and see what they well I just don't want people to think that I'm unaware of like the privileges that I have and that I don't want to come across as like bragging it's like I would like to show more in my life and like share more of the things I love and the things that I like to do but I don't want to be like I have this and then I have this and then we're gonna go and do that and Shane's talking to her and he explained like no this is good this is great and then Morgan even said like as an aspiring youtuber like you know this inspires me it makes me want to work hard it makes me want to do better what's fascinating to me is how Shane is able to give that advice to bunny right but he is dealing with the same thing that she was dealing with and this is interesting because Shane is somebody who's regularly working on being a fixer always trying to help other people but how often do we have to help ourselves too so something that's you might be struggling with is that you're really good at giving people advice but not taking it yourself and this is something that I struggled with a lot you know like throughout my entire life I I even like in my active addiction and I was just an awful human being I still I still like to help people where I can I still like giving people advice I it's something I've done since like middle school and high school like and a lot of the stems from my childhood if you want to get into the quick psychology of Chris real quick I had an alcoholic mom who I couldn't fix so what I was trying to do was always trying to fix other people by giving them advice and the things like that and maybe that's part of the reason why I'm in this career path that I'm in of mental health but it's it's crazy because so many of us we give people advice all the time it's so easy to look at somebody else's life life and tell them what they should do right we know exactly how somebody else's life should run but we're dealing with those same things and this is a struggle that so many of us have so I want to give you some tips that kind of help me out with this when I first started working on my mental health and I was confused or I was lost or I didn't know what to do in a situation something that my mom often said to me was like what would you tell Dylan my son what would you tell him to do in this situation I'm like oh right and then that started branching out in my head because she constantly said that like when I wanted to lash out or yell at somebody because I had some anger issues by the way I'm working on an anger management book as soon as I stop recording this video but like what would I tell my son to do would I tell my son to freak out on somebody would I tell my son to get angry or break something or you know what I mean and it's like no I absolutely wouldn't so what would I tell somebody else who's dealing with depression or anxiety what would I say to them right now if I could take that and say okay well why can't I say that to myself and a lot of this has to do with self love self compassion and a lot of us care more about other people than we do for ourselves so one of the tips I want to give you is treat yourself talk to yourself like you would a friend right like are you forgiving are you compassionate are you understanding because if you have those qualities then quit beating yourself up so much you know what I'm saying now I'm not even saying what Shane did was wrong I think you know with somebody like Shane Dawson and I was talking to Tristan about this Jenna Marbles and Julian had kind of a similar conversation before they moved into their own house I think this helps us be a better judge of characters with these youtubers because there is some humility and we see what they're saying and like you know of course all of them could be lying to us but I'm a little bit of an optimist and I can tell like you know somebody like Shane Dawson did come from humble beginnings somebody like Jenna Marbles came from humble beginnings a lot of these people did so when they're when they're sharing that with you I think it helps us feel a little bit more connected and that they're not just doing this like to flex on us and stuff so I do appreciate that about that so like what I'm saying like again I'm not saying Shane Dawson did anything wrong but it brings up a very interesting conversation because so many of you reach out to me you DM me you tweet at me you're asking me for advice and you know like my number one piece of advice like if you can't get a hold of me like look I'm not always around and I can't reply to all of your DMs I can't do everything like one of the best things you could do is say like what would what would Chris tell me to do and I'm not even saying like my my suggestions are always right but ask yourself what would this person do something I try to teach my clients is if you're trying to grow and become a better person like think of somebody who you aspire to be right this can be somebody in the past it could be somebody in the present like who do you look up to right like for example like maybe if Martin Luther King or Gandhi or whoever it is ask yourself in any given situation what would they do what would they say right that's something that you can do to kind of guide yourself in a north star so when you when you don't want to get out of the bed in the morning when you're feeling a lack of motivation when you're beating yourself up and you're doing this when you're doing that whatever it is ask yourself what would this other person do what would they tell me because like what I what are my goals for this channel is to provide you with so many tools that you don't even need me really right maybe you come here for like refreshers but I want to give you tools so like you can sit back and just say okay what would what would this person tell me to do in this situation because there's only so much somebody can teach us you know what I mean and this like a real world scenario that I can relate this to is I know somebody who runs a family support group for people who are the loved ones of drug addicts and alcoholics and she runs this group and she gives people tools and methods it's like a workshop to teach people how to maintain their mental health and you know set boundaries and do all these amazing things right when they have a loved one who's addicted well recently this person's um had a loved one who relapsed and they don't know what to do they don't know what to do every excuse is flying through their head and I basically like have to tell her like well what would you tell somebody in your group if somebody in your group was telling you all these things giving you excuses telling you what you can't do what would you tell them and it's interesting because you can kind of see this light switch go off right because we we have that thing what what what we call a terminal uniqueness where we think oh this might help you but it won't help me right so ask yourself that like what would you tell somebody else in a situation like if if you are in I'm just gonna throw this out there if you're in an abusive relationship what would you tell your friend what would you tell your family member what would you tell your son what would you tell your daughter what would you tell this person to do right then try to take that advice yourself now the last thing I'll in this video with is a huge part of this is being honest okay honesty is a huge part okay this is where self awareness comes in because when I'm teaching this to people about like what would you tell this other person sometimes people lie to themselves and they say oh I would tell them to do this just so they can justify their own behavior and that's not what we do that's not what we do for example um if my son say say you know I say I'm in a bad mood say I'm in a bad mood I want to lash out I want to freak out on somebody I want to scream at somebody I want to do all this stuff right and then something pops in my head what would I tell my son to do if this was a kid at school I'd be lying to myself if I said oh I want I think my son should go punch that kid in the face I think my son should go tease that kid and make fun of him like that's lying I don't want my son to become that person I don't want my son to get bullied and then become a bully that's not it so like don't lie to yourself and you're asking yourself about what kind of suggestions you would give somebody else right just so you can justify your own behaviors because then then this this tool that I'm giving you the suggestion I'm giving you is completely useless all right so this is just something that I want you to think about throughout your day throughout your week even because something I've realized especially in our discord server so many people we call it the wounded heal healer okay the wounded healer so many people who have gone through mental illness who have gone through trauma who have gone through tragedy like we love helping people we're so kind and compassionate like if you've just sit in the discord sometimes you guys I'm just sitting in the discord and just watching the love and support you give each other right and what we need to do we need to figure out how do we flip that and turn and give that love and support to ourselves how can we take what we're offering so many other people and do it for ourselves too I know a lot of you struggle with self love self compassion all these things right but if you can somehow take that love and compassion that you give to other people and turn it on to yourself your mental health will start to get better and start loving yourself a little bit more and even if you don't love yourself a little bit more today just start liking yourself a little bit more just by being a little bit nicer to yourself all right but anyways let me know down in the comments below like is this something that you struggle with is this something that you struggle with where it's easier for you to give people advice but you suck at taking your own advice all right even if you have an example I would love to hear about it down in the comments okay let's go down there and let's support each other in the comments all right anyways that's all I got for you with this video if you like this video please give it a thumbs up if you're new make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell because I make a ton of videos and a huge thank you to everybody supporting the channel over on patreon you are all amazing I have a patreon q&a coming up very soon it might be up today maybe tomorrow but anyways I'll be answering all your questions all right thanks so much for watching take your own advice and I'll see you next time