 Well, we're continuing our series on marriage and the family and In verse 4 of Ephesians chapter 6 the Apostle Paul is writing concerning children and In Ephesians chapter 6 verse 4 He says you fathers do not provoke your children to wrath but bring them up in the training and Admonition of the Lord and so Today, we're gonna be sharing concerning raising kids to have faith in Jesus Christ and As I give this particular teaching it's intended To really encourage all of us to do our very best We who are parents Do our very best to teach our children and this particular teaching comes from a fellow traveler because God knows I'm not an expert on raising children and Raising kids for me has been a difficult journey What I want to do is just encourage all of us and some very basic things that relate to this very difficult but important task Now as we've been going through our series I mentioned to you that part of God's design for marriage is to produce believing children in the Old Testament book of Malachi in chapter 2 verse 15 Well, that verse tells us that God is seeking godly Offspring now when Malachi writes concerning godly offspring Godly offspring speaks of children who are born to believing parents and the thought is that parents would be believers and the Believers would be believers in God who honored their vows to marriage as well as their promises to God So this would encourage faith to be personally lived out and it would encourage that faith to be given to their children So raising children who fear and serve the Lord is a mission, but it has no guarantee of success it's a task that is ongoing and Often in many ways it becomes more difficult as time passes on And I'm not through with the task even though all of my children today are adults My role hasn't changed much the jobs this job description has So at this point I see myself more as an observer an occasional counselor and teacher Sometimes we might think it's easier to be a parent over time But I found that it was easier to minister to my children when they were very young It was easier to take a romantic weekend when they were younger It was easier to gather them together for their devotions. It was easier even then to correct them But as they grew older they required a different kind of attention as they entered adolescence They began developing their own thoughts their own values It became a challenge to let them grow and yet still be an influence in their lives When they became adults, it was another time of transition and I am now more hands-off Being a grandparent is also a transition and in many ways I have taken in my family more of a patriarchal kind of role You see it's been said that life is a race and and it's a race that all of us are running in and as they grew I began to realize that life was more of a relay race and relay races are won by a Successful exchange of the baton. I was handed a baton a baton of faith From faithful witnesses who who handed it to me and when I became a parent it became my Responsibility to to pass that baton to my own children You see when I was reading and as I've read the Bible I I have discovered that there are many people who are in Scripture that we know by name who are godly people who had very ungodly children You have Adam and Eve and Adam and Eve raised Cain You have Noah who had a son named Ham and a sister named eggs Show me mercy. I'm old You had Eli the priest. He had two ungodly sons Hofty and Phineas King David had ungodly sons Amnon and Absalom Solomon had a son named Jeroboam and Hezekiah had Manasseh and you can see over and over and over again Godly men who had ungodly children Well, obviously godly parents can have ungodly kids But ultimately all we as parents can do is our best and we hold on and we trust the Lord as we raise him You see as Christians we are to take the faith that we have in Christ and do our very best to Evangelize our own kids to give it away in Deuteronomy 4 9 and 10 It says be careful and watch yourselves closely So that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live Teach them to your children and to their children after them Remember the day you stood before the Lord your God at Horrib when he said to me Assemble the people before me to hear my words So that they may learn to revere me as long as they live in the land and may teach them to their children And so bringing children to faith in Christ is of utmost importance and it's to be taken seriously Raising children is a spiritual task that we work very hard at and we have to be completely dedicated to Joshua 24 tells us in verse 15 If serving the Lord seems undesirable to you then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve Whether the gods your father served beyond the river or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you are living But as for me and my house we will serve the Lord It's a spiritual task. You have to be dedicated to it There are those who will say well, we're gonna let our children determine their own faith when they grow up But that reveals something of the parents faith that doesn't mean anything to them They and their children will ultimately reap the consequences of a life lived without God You see God's word makes it clear that parents are responsible to nurture faith in Jesus Christ We are a Continual and the greatest continual influence in their lives So we need to exert as much godly influence as we can possibly do while we still have the ability to do so Bringing children to faith in Christ is spiritual. It's something we work at We need to encourage our kids to faith in the Lord over their entire lifetime There's no guarantee of success and that serves as a powerful incentive for us to do our best You see our society the society that our children are being born into our society Exerts tremendous pressure to reject faith in Christ and to compromise any faith you might have Everything about this world system works against faith in Jesus Christ everything This world system encourages lust it encourages materialism sinful pride Arrogance, it's all part of this system. That's called the world in first John 2 15 through 17 We're told do not love the world or anything in the world If anyone loves the world the love of the father's not in him for everything in the world the cravings of sinful man The lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and what he has done comes not from the father But from the world and that's the system. That is after your children. That is the system that relentlessly Evangelizes him and there's a continuous influence from the world to entice your kids away from the Lord Here's a there's there are two different kinds of Messages that are being poured into their lives a message from the world and a message from the gospel My wife Marie and I were suffering the other day in Maui Somebody has to as you know some of you may know we went with the church and we took the church to Hawaii and Marie and I my wife and I were together we went out for some breakfast and When we first went to Maui the very first time we went we were up in in an area called Lahaina And in that area there we stayed in a particular place and had discovered little restaurant that is Just it serves great pancakes to be honest with you And so we got up and decided to go for breakfast and we traveled up about it was about 35 minutes from where we were staying We traveled up the northern Northwestern coast and we found this place and we went in and sat down and and it was playing this old music, you know From the 60s and I don't know the atmosphere was was I liked it to be honest with you, you know my pancakes and Just it just was it there was kind of a what I would call a cool vibe Just you know some old songs, you know temptations and just just that kind of thing and just I'm there with my girl And and I'm enjoying that moment with there And it's one of those moments that you really enjoy when somebody decides to turn the television set on and It's right next to us and and if there's a game on some Inconsequential basketball game neither one of the teams mattered to me. They could both lose and I wouldn't cry You know, but they turned it on loud so the other patrons could hear and now That sound from the television set is Drowning out the sound of the music now I could still hear the music, but I had to concentrate Just so I could continue listening to what I wanted to listen to and as I was there I spoke to my wife and I said this is this reminds of what the world is You have one track that's going that you want to hear but another track That's going that's simply a distraction and as I thought about that. I told Marie I said that's like what I'm going to be teaching on with the kids and parents and raising them There are two tracks that are going on right now the track that you've given to your kids and That track is the gospel and the track that the world gives to them, which is the tracks of my tears. No, it's the track 60s this and that but anyway, old people know exactly what I just said your younger ones are going. Well, that was deep No, it wasn't it really wasn't just an old song They're tracks of my tears, but anyway But that's what the world offers tears sorrow lust materialism That's what it offers and what God offers is life and that which is more abundant And it's our desire as Christian parents to give to our children that which is the foundation so that when the world comes and Entices with the lust of the flesh lust of the eyes the pride of life that is in this world this God ungodly world that is a doomed It's a doomed Philosophy of life We're wanting to give our children the words of life and they're dealing with so many things I mean think about what our kids are hearing in terms of the various soundtracks that are being played They're dealing with their peer pressure And the peer pressure encourages them to do anything to fit in to not be any Different than other people if you don't think that your kids or the young people you're around are Being affected speak to them about abortion Speak to them about homosexuality Ask them about gender fluidity Ask them things that relate to living together. It's it wrong. Is it right? What do you know? And I'm telling you they have been influenced by this world They don't want to say what they may have been taught because that contradicts everything. They're hearing in different places There are sexual pressures that are bombarding them from the time. They're small It's seen in a variety of ways that they think it's seen in the way that they dress There are a lot of a lot of people with male and female who dress in a way that is really more provocative It's really more. It's it's actually nasty in many ways. I mean, you know You know the yoga pants and this and that that's a nasty man Nasty three things tell you the truth a drunk a child and yoga pants, but anyway And that dumb yes there are a lot of temptations to drug and alcohol experimentation and Again, if you have a Christian child and you don't think so ask them whether it's okay to smoke pot Ask them if marijuana is okay and Find out what they actually really believe violence if violence is something that young people deal with and for many it's simply common It's even normal for some it's it's another means of entertainment. It's simply found on video games Then you see entertainment When it comes to entertainment, did you know that children watch over 4,000 commercials on television a year? That violent movies and video games are intentionally marketed to children and adolescents That by the age of 18, they have seen over 18,000 murders 9,000 violent sexual attacks and that they have been bombarded with profanity vulgarity and blasphemy And you even see that in their cartoons There are over 160 magazines that are targeting children One magazine came in our mail with an article on sodomy It was targeting high school girls and was presented as a means of birth control young people see 45 percent more beer ads and 27 percent more ads for hard liquor in teen magazines than adults do in their particular magazines despite the master settlement agreement with the tobacco industry in 1998 tobacco advertising expenditures in 38 youth-oriented magazines amounted to 217 million dollars in the year 2000 today technology provides instant information and Immediate gratification many have an addiction to their phones and computers and they have no actual friends If you don't think so take away the iPhone or the computer from your kid and see how they respond to that Many of them have friends. They call friends out in the netherworld out there with people They've never even met but they share their hearts and their stories with these people a growing number are introduced to pornography via the Internet and and many are using their phones to send pictures of themselves naked to other boys and other girls Popular TV entertainers and TV series undermine Christian values and promote sin Talk show hosts and movie stars Educate but they don't necessarily Entertain many of them today think of themselves as Political pundits and they want to give you their advice and their thoughts on the world and people will listen to them thinking Surely they have the ability to communicate these things to me after all they're a popular singer or they have a TV daytime program They must be geniuses Well, there's a very real cosmic war that is being fought for our children's minds And that's why it's so important to raise our kids in the knowledge of the Lord now as you look at this in verse 4 notice That was your introduction. Let's get into our study You fathers do not provoke your children to wrath But bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord Fathers have incredible influence on their children what they like what they think Permanently affects their kids. There's no doubt about that as I was preparing this I was thinking of my own father's influence in my life and As a young boy, I wanted to be like my dad and there are things that I've never really shared Never really had any reason to but but the things that could illustrate what I'm saying When I say this my father liked the trumpet I don't know why but he did and when I grew up he had you know different songs that he would like and many times they were by people who were playing the horn and so me I had a musical aptitude and I was growing up and and But my desire was to play drums. I like the drums But my dad my dad liked the trumpet and so when I was nine years old I started to learn to play the trumpet I actually played trumpet in bands in junior high into my freshman year in high school and and I played the trumpet because my Dad liked it and I can still remember there was a particular song that my dad liked That was I think was called Wonderland by night and it was it's a trumpet is a song with that is has a trumpet solo in it that leads and at the age of about nine or ten when I was learning to play the horn I Listened and listened and listened to that song so I could hear how he was playing it And I worked and worked on it in my bedroom until I had up Enough for you to recognize what I was trying to do obviously There's I was in the proto you know some prodigy with a trumpet But I was sure trying and then my dad was in the garage, which was only 40 feet or so from my Bedroom I opened up the window and I stood there actually so he couldn't see me I was embarrassed, but I still remember trying to play that song to my dad So he could hear me trying to play something he liked That was how much he influenced me my dad was not an educated man But my dad was a reader and my dad every night as I can recall as a kid every night I would go to say good night to him in his room and he'd have the readers digest and you know to this day I have the readers digest my wife got a subscription to it and I have the readers digest my dad loved the rams and Now I have reason to also No, I grew up with the Rams. You know my dad was a Rams fan He used to call him the lambs for so long But now they're the Rams right and so but my dad liked the Rams And so I grew up like in the Rams my dad loved the Dodgers and I loved the Dodgers my son loves the Dodgers His son loves the Dodgers, you know, I can't even say to my my granddaughter Bella You know, you're such an angel because she'll say I hate the angels. That's that's my daughter It's the truth and and my my little David's the same way the baby. David's the same way that you know But I can remember when the Dodgers moved to LA from Brooklyn I remember that and my dad took me to one baseball game in my life And I still remember that game as I went to the Coliseum and watched the Dodgers play for the first time and became a Lifelong fan of the Dodgers. That was my dad's influence. Now my dad took us to the LA auto show and I still remember he only took us once but I still remember going to the LA auto show with my dad and now My my boys I raised my boys going with dad to the LA auto show. There's no harm in looking because I'll never help you buy one of those But good looking we were just there just the other day, you know with my boys, you know We go why because my dad took me and those are things that have stayed with me My dad took his credit Very personally my dad worked hard. My dad loved his wife My dad cared for his kids. These are things that I learned by watching and then he'd say things like take care of your credit David your name's the most important thing that you have Take care of your health son because if you if you get sick you can't work if you if you can't work You can't provide for your family. Those were the things my dad not only told me Those are the things my dad did because my dad would be on vacation and my mom would say to my dad Don't answer the phone because the phone was ringing. They would say Frank Can you come in my dad would leave vacation to go to work? And so my mom would get upset because dad was that kind of man He got up in in them I said remember him leaving every morning at 7 coming home every morning every evening rather at 7 I like a clock that was my father and I saw his work apps. I I saw what he did with his credit and all When we went to the LA show back in the early 60s, I still remember this I remember going to my dad and at that time you actually had You had little stages small stages and they would have forms of entertainment. I still remember walking with my dad past this one stage with some young men playing music and I think it might have been 1962 and we were walking by and there was they there were and it was the only auto show He ever took me to but I still remember this and I looked at this band playing I wasn't really impressed that much with them But later on I found out it was the Beach Boys and the Beach Boys were doing that They were from Hawthorne and they were there in the area doing some music getting some attention And then they wrote a song don't worry baby and I told my dad I really liked that song and I still remember the only song my dad ever went and bought and gave to me Was by the Beach Boys. Don't worry baby See these are things that I tear up remembering I tear up your father Makes an impact in a way that no other man can your daddy does Your dad and he wasn't my big buddy my big playground friend. Hey dad your home from work Let's play catch. Are you kidding my dad would come home from work? And it was like a conquering general was arriving, you know, my mom would say quiet down dad's home Don't bother him. He loves you, but he may kill you Let him go my dad had to go into the bathroom the minute he came home every night and he would wash his face wash his hands Then he'd be ready to put up with us. That was my dad So today we have a lot of men who want to be their kids playground buddy Here he doesn't need a buddy, you know, if you could play catch that's fine, but don't beat yourself to death if you can't My dad didn't come and watch me me play ball He didn't watch me in in track He didn't watch me do any of the things that I did but he's still my father and when he could I valued those moments But I knew he was working hard for the family So I didn't cry myself to sleep at night because daddy didn't see me hit that home run I didn't cry because he wasn't there when I is in that concert I that that didn't matter because my father my father was not my buddy My father was the authority in the house. He was the man and I respected him and that's how I was raised I didn't expect to hear from him every moment things of making me feel number one I expected my father to be authority to be the man to help me to become a man like him He wasn't a big kid. He wasn't my adult friend. He was my father Now Paul commands fathers to not provoke their children to wrath They are to wield authority. They're to bring discipline into the home and and and when you're young It's easier for the father to do that You discipline them, but you don't abuse them So we are careful what we say to them We are careful how we correct them and when we do correct them We do so because we love them not because they got on our last nerve not because they're Interrupting what I want to do when I'm resting, but when we correct them It's because we love them like it says in Proverbs 13 24 if you refuse to discipline your children It proves you don't love them if you love your children, you will be prompt to discipline them So he's saying this to us He says again, do not provoke your children to wrath but bring them up in the training and Admonition of the Lord To bring up means to nourish nourish them in the discipline and understanding of God The word train speaks of instruction that increases their virtue the word Admonition speaks of appealing to their understanding Exhorting them. He's saying father nourish them instruct them Exhort them admonish them in the ways of God our instructions and our examples Encourage them to godly living you see when they're small they're open to instruction, but they learn from your example They love you they love you more than you could possibly understand They hold you in the highest esteem my son David thought I was a Superman it's so funny how he he really did you know I I used to work out a long time ago as you can tell a long time ago I used to work out, but I was never a big old muscular guy I've always tried to stay you know as thin as I as I can I weighed 167 pounds And I used to pound the weights and this and that and and so I still remember my son Dave Who is probably about nine or ten he was little I still remember him telling his friend He let the his friend into the house, and I was just kind of standing there, and he says to his friend This is my dad. He's a power lifter, and his But he thought I was Hercules. He thought I was Superman. I thought my father was Superman I literally did because he told me he was and and My son thought that I was but that's how they look at you. They think that you are you are everything and So they hold us in the highest possible esteem. We are everything and and they're more compliant when they're young But that doesn't mean that they're saved so that that that requires me to Remember they have a nature that a nature that is in rebellion Against the Lord and that's why you discipline them, and that's why you evangelize them Proverbs 22 15 folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him See parents are given the command to raise children in the Lord It is our responsibility to train up our children in the things of Jesus It isn't the church's responsibility. It isn't the school's responsibility. It isn't our friend's responsibility to do that for us It's not childcare providers. It's not family members. It's us the task and responsibility remains with us But I am very grateful for a community that shares our values I'm grateful for a community that encourages my child to remain on the right path And with that said I should at this point say this for any of you who are involved in education any of you teachers I from the bottom of my heart want to say to you Thank you for not undermining what we're trying to do in our kids lives I'm grateful for Christian teachers and and educators because They are not responsible for raising my kids, but they don't undermine at least what I'm trying to do It's to succeed. We we parents need to adopt the values of the kingdom We need to establish proper priorities and we need to hold fast to them over our lifetime as we grow in maturity Our kids will consistently be influenced by us for good Our lives need to revolve around how we can lead our kids into the kingdom That requires time sacrifice prayer careful education in the ways of the Lord We Christians need to realize how important it is to raise our kids to love Jesus Christ. They grow so quickly We give them careful attention and training while we have them I'll too soon. They grow up and all too soon. They leave home and a large part of our role is over An alarming number of children are being born to parents who are unmarried It's producing an epidemic of fatherless children While over 80 percent up to 93 percent in some communities According to Michelle Castillo reporting for CBS News in March of 2013 44 percent of American women will have given birth by the time they are 25 But only 38 percent are married by that age By 30 two-thirds of women will have had a child out of wedlock 83 percent of first births to non-high school graduates are to unwed mothers The biggest rise in unmarried pregnancy is among the 54 percent of middle American women Which include women who have graduated high school and completed some college But do not have a degree in this group the average age of having the first child is 24 and they are married at 27 58 percent of the first births in this group are to unwed mothers My heart goes out to the single parents attempting to raise their babies alone and as a church we do what we can to be of help Many children without married parents are ending up neglected Some bear them, but don't raise them Leaving them in unstable circumstances. I'm convinced that this is the root of the rebellion We see in many today Proverbs 30 verses 11 and 12 says there's a generation that curses its father does not bless its mother There is a generation that is pure in its own eyes yet is not washed from its filthiness I believe we're living into time when that generation is recognizable verse 4 says we're to bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord as a parent I Am to channel or direct them I'm not to break their spirit. I shape it and as a father. That's one of my primary responsibilities in Psalm 78 verses 5 through 7 it says he established a testimony in Jacob and Appointed a law in Israel which he commanded our fathers that they should make them known to their children That the generation to come might know them the children who would be born That they may arise and declare them to their children that they may set their hope in God and not forget the works of God But keep his commandments. I am as a father to instruct my children who in turn are to instruct theirs And as a father, that's been one of my greatest concerns. You see I know I'm weak and I know I'm imperfect But I have tried to communicate faith to my kids Proverbs 22 6 says it train up a child in the way. He should go when he's old. He will not depart from it So what can I do? Well, like it says train up a child when it says train up a child the word train speaks of provoking them to go in a direction But that direction is conformed to their temperament and their faith train up a child in the way He should go so you're provoking them to go in the proper direction The word train would be used in that time Concerning midwives who would be attending the birth of a child and when the baby was born They would apply date honey to the lips of a newborn and it would encourage the nursing reflex So what we're to do is study our kids we study our children's temperament their skills their gifts and we encourage them Because if you have one kid, that's one thing when you have two you begin to discover some things When you have three or four or more you discover a whole lot more Because when you have the one child and the child may be the kind of kid who is who is very reasonable with you and all and then you See somebody with a couple of kids and their kids are unruly you can have a self-righteous attitude in your back Your mind saying oh, they just don't parent right. They're not using the techniques I do I ought to teach them out. Well, you have you actually had a compliant child But when you have a David When you have a child that has his own mind And when you have one and then you have another and you start seeing that I have a little girl I have a little boy their temperaments are different Then you have another little boy and then another little girl and you see that there is a spectrum of temperaments You don't do the same kind of training with all four each one has a different personality Each one has a different temperament each has a different way I was with my son David recently and and his son was acting up his son David Little David was acting up and my son David smacked him on the bottom and the little boy My grandson turned to his dad and looked at him and said that didn't hurt He did that and my son looks at me and I went because that was my son David I said my prayers have been answered You got one just like I had enjoy Then I have Joseph I look at Joseph. I just have to look at my son Joseph and son that disappoints me I'm sorry dad. You know different temperaments different. You have to study your kids You need to go to understand them and then you encourage them You see when a baby was born a Jewish mother would minister to her her infant while she was nursing the baby She would pray and she would sing and she would recite scripture and and do those kinds of things when the baby was very small When the baby grew older and was able at that point to begin to speak and understand more the father took over the Responsibility he would teach the child prayers and and teach the child basic Bible doctrine various scriptures the training and the Discipling of that child was in the father's hands Isaiah 38 19 the father shall make known your truth to the children So the training in scripture produced a conscience and developed a moral foundation So that child was taught the commandments thou shalt thou shalt not they were taught that from an early age They knew this is right. This is wrong that formed their conscience It created a worldview that had God in the center in Proverbs 4 11 through 13 I have taught you in the way of wisdom. I have led you in the right paths When you walk your steps will not be hindered when you run you will not stumble take firm hold of instruction Do not let go keep her. She is your life So this taught the child that they were not the center of the universe Today our kids think that they are they think they are everything revolves around them what they want where they want to go What they want to do you got me this I didn't ask for that. I wanted this it's Christmas Isn't it my birthday? You didn't give me the things that I want. How come you gave her that what I wanted that you've heard it I've heard it They're the center of the universe. They think that in in in earlier days a parent would say oh, that's not good for you No, then they would just take it away I can still remember my mom one day when my brother Frank and I were having ice cream and we're little kids And and I looked at his and and I looked at mine and I and I said that's not fair He got more than me and my mom said oh did he get more ice cream than you David? And I said yes, that's not right. See I was already a justice warrior That's not right You know my mom mama did did she go and get more ice cream and you know She took mine and she took his and she put it down the sink and she said you complain you don't get How many parents do that today? Very few what do they do? Oh wait a minute. Let me measure that because according to your system of justice This is how it should be My mom used to use a word don't da don't be dumb Don't be dumb. I learned one time if you complain you don't get it doesn't take that much There are some mamas who will make well He likes this food and this kid likes that food and this kid likes so she makes three different meals for those brats You know what my kids didn't like Marie going to retreats because I would make one thing and They would say I don't like this mama doesn't make it for me. I say mama will be back in two days So by then you'll be plenty hungry Or you'll eat this guess what? They ate it Guess why they're hungry So they learn to play you from day one and then they play you against one another So what we need to remember is one simple thing. Who's who's your daddy? No, who? Who's the parent? Who's the parent? It's real simple. Isn't it? Who's the parent it works out that way and they need to learn that they need to respect They need to understand they're not the center of the world. They're simply part of it We all together are celebrating the reality of one who is in control and is to be worshipped We teach them that we teach them fear and respect we we teach them those things by being fathers who fear and respect the Lord In Deuteronomy 6 1 and 2 this is the commandment and these are the statutes and judgments Which the Lord your God is commanded to teach you that you may observe them in the land Which you are crossing over to possess that you may fear the Lord your God to keep all his statutes and his commandments Which I command you you and your son and your grandson all the days of your life and that your days may be prolonged So they have a worldview produced that is founded on God's word and we explain it and encourage them to obey How can we accomplish this as parents? We start out as early as we can Even if you've recently been saved Start reading start sharing God's word with your kids Deuteronomy chapter 6 4 through 9 gives us guidelines in Deuteronomy 6 4 through 9 it reads Here, oh Israel the Lord our God the Lord is one You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart with all your soul and with all your strength These words which I command you today shall be in your heart You shall teach them diligently to your children Shall talk of them when you sit in your house when you walk by the way when you lie down when you rise up You shall bind them as a sign on your hands. They shall be as frontlets between your eyes You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates so this gives us ways to bring our kids to faith in Christ and Verse 4 we need to have a saving knowledge of God. We need to know Jesus Christ He is our unique God even as it says in In that passage the Lord your God is one you shall love him with all of your heart with all your soul with all your strength So we need to know who he is He is our God and we need to remember that we cannot give what we do not possess Christianity is not simply a religion. It's a way of life. It's a relationship with God My Christian faith is not simply because I go to a Calvary Chapel church My faith is built on my relationship with God through Jesus Christ, and that's the real thing That's what it is. That's its essence Jesus in John 17 3 said this is eternal life that they may know you The only true God in Jesus Christ whom you have sent it's not that you may go to this church It's that you may that they may have a relationship with God through Jesus Christ That's the key and so Take care of your walk with God parent make that your number one love in your life Follow Christ with all of your heart love him Because as it happens he says and in in he says you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and soul Keep the Lord the center of your life Live out your faith Share it with your children Have a faith that is open and growing Your children need to see real faith real commitment Many children don't see that today. What they have is a said faith from their parents It's a said faith the parents say yeah, I believe in God. Yes, this family is Christian But I put you in soccer. I'm hoping you'll get some kind of scholarship And so we're gonna make sure that you're in your soccer tournaments And even if it means we have to drive to Nevada, Arizona or whatever for that tournament It's a Sunday. Well, we'll have devotions and we never do and because hopefully you're gonna be able to get a Scholarship one day and there are millions of kids out there who are who are wanting to have scholarships and pray play Pro ball and all who never will and we lost our Opportunities to evangelize our children because we taught them that there are more important things in life than following God There are a whole lot of families who have given up their children to the altar of sports Thousands millions Christians people who said they love the Lord, but they love the sport more and the kid guess what they're gonna do They're gonna follow your example. Not what you're saying But what you did and so how do they know that you love the Lord? He says love God with all your heart the heart is the inner being the origin of all thoughts words and deeds Love God with all your soul. That's the seat of all emotional activity Love God with all your strength Serve the Lord Now heart soul and strength Well, that that occurs that model occurs to example explanation and enforcement example My priorities Are the things that they Are gonna see Many of my priorities Are things I don't even know I have they're unconscious What I watch Where I go What I read The language that I use What is valuable to me Is seen by them and by the way They are watching I was talking to my son david David's 40 years old And I was talking to my david the other day And I said to him You know david mom and I are not real What's the word we're not real demonstrative in our our love You know, I'm not that guy that makes out with his girlfriend on the beach. That's not me I I get sick and I see that I want to throw cold water on him I'm not that guy marie and I don't dress up alike You know, we both wear red and black and we kind of walk like tweedle d and tweedle dumb. That's not us you know When we're together we're together, but we're not clinging to one another everywhere we go like Like it's a body with two heads. We're not that way So I'm telling my son. I'm saying, you know, your mom and I we're not real demonstrative and he starts to laugh My son smiles and laughs. He says that's not true dad I said what? He goes that's not true He said you're very demonstrative with mom and I looked at him. I said No, I'm not He said dad no marie and I are sitting on the couch there in the front room He says look my foot is on her foot And he said dad You always do that anytime mama's near you you move your foot so that's touching her every time And I said really Really? He goes, yeah, and then it hit me That's right. That's true at night when we're going to sleep I move my hand to find her hand and I'll hold on to it I just do that, but I don't think of it. So to me I'm not doing anything to him. I'm a model I'm telling you that's what's happening with you Your your your kids if your parent and they're still growing even now at 40 They see you They they see how you talk They see how you look when marie walks into a room and I'm there and my son sees Even if she was there a moment ago, I'll look at her. I always do the same thing. I always just Just love her with my eyes. I always do. I just I just love her with my eyes My mom used to use that phrase just love her with your eyes and I do And people will know when my girl walked in the room. They'll know they don't even have to know who she is The way I look at her when she comes in And my kids Have seen that Your kids are watching you too They're watching you This is how a man loves a woman. This is how a man treats a wife This is how a man Treats the mother of his children They watch you you can all day long tell them how much they ought to respect mom And then you get mad at her and yell at her in front of the kids and they say yeah, that's love Letting her know who I am and that's love. No. No, you're teaching them the wrong things And they're watching you and I still remember when marie and I we would put our kids to bed at nine o'clock And sometimes when time change came that would came it would still be light outside and they'd be laying there and We didn't watch tv We didn't watch tv till they went to bed We would let them see jeopardy and wheel of fortune Or maybe maybe something like that educational But we didn't they didn't grow up with that when they went to bed Then marie and I would sit down in the front room and we would watch whatever program we watched and I can still remember That my son I would see my side here sound then I'd see a shadow And they would be crawling Do your kids ever do that they would crawl up the hall and Like I didn't hear them, you know And they'd look to see what we were watching They would look to see what we were watching And they would listen to the sound Of the program We used to have what was called the three strike rule if there was a profanity mild profanity I'd turn to the boys strike one Strike two it's out Then that was it no more they learned that they learned that they watched and to this day they remember those things Because I knew that I explained But I also know that I example They're going to be what I am not just what I say And that to me has been a very important thing now as far as explanation is concerned There are conversations you have your your devotion sit down with your kid Open the bible read a scripture pray with them. You don't have to give them a 40 minute sermon You just open the bible and you read to them and you say god wants us to love one another or god wants This is what we'll do you pray with them our children were raised with that Sometimes they'll ask questions and you when you have the opportunity you share You take time to know them you know who they are You know who their friends are you begin to ask what are your hopes? What are your plans? What are your dreams? And you have conversations and explanations go along with that I once read that kids who live with their parents spend less than 30 minutes a week In meaningful conversation with their mother A week 30 minutes and 15 minutes per week with their dads So you show an interest in them you visit with them you laugh with them Sometimes you may even you may even cry with them Which I have done with my children Many times you take walks you enjoy devotions you pray you invest in conversation That brings scripture to life you talk about god's purpose You hug them you kiss them. Yes. I kiss my sons. I kiss my grandsons You love them You monitor their time on their phones the computers their video games And you teach them the important importance of a commitment to god and to a church And then you enforce the discipline in the home while you can When a home rule is violated you discipline in a reasonable way You appeal to scripture and you keep it as the foundation and finally Build your home into a sanctuary Transform your home into a church Would you let a murderer or a rapist a profane belligerent violent person in your home to invade? Be careful what you let in through the internet through the cable through tv through the radio printed page Be careful who you allow in your home because these violent criminal blasphemous people enter in through movies through radio and through your television set and through the computer There's nothing wrong with making sure that your home remains pure and set apart for god As a matter of fact, that's the right thing to do because your children will learn That faith isn't something that's shown just once in a while Faith is something you live every day And when they understand that you may be raising a child who will serve the lord The toughest thing you have to do in life as a parent really Is to give your faith to your kids Because they have wills of their own They're going to do what they want But when you live for jesus in such a way that shows he is so good Your children will say i want to have the god of my father I want to follow jesus christ And at the end that is the most important thing that you will ever have Is the faith of god in your home