 Ladies and gentlemen, this is Jack Benny talking and before starting our program I'd like to remind you that there's still time for you to give generously to your local community chest a Fund which is of tremendous importance to every community every year Since it supplies care for the underprivileged and the unfortunate in time of war Your local community chest performs an even more vital function for its funds must now meet the needs of civilians War workers and our fighting men You want to share in this important work and you can For there's still time for you to take part in your local drive Make your contribution tomorrow The Grape Nuts Flakes program starring Jack Benny with Mary Livingston Phil Harris Dennis Day Rochester and yours truly Send them to work with a smile That's what you want to do ladies, isn't it because the worker who works with a smile works his best And you can start your man off with a grin if you start him off with a big Luscious bowl full of delicious flavorful grape nuts flakes your favorite grape nuts flavor a delicious toasty brown flake form There's something about that moldy rich sweet as a nut grape nuts flakes goodness There's something about that distinctive different grape nuts flakes flavor that start your folks off in high. Yes, sir There's an outstanding difference about grape nuts flakes because they're made a different way You see they're a blend of two delicious grains Sun-ripened wheat and malted barley and grape nuts flakes are toasted to a delicate crisp golden brown That's to give them a texture just as well as their taste So for a release swell breakfast dish for a treat that your folks will love to the last crispy spoonful Ask for delicious grape nuts flakes America's fastest-growing breakfast cereal Ladies and gentlemen, we bring you a man who turned in his Maxwell to the junk salvage drive last week That's right. No car now and this morning came all the way from Beverly Hills on a Pogo stick with an outboard motor Jack Benny. Thank you. Thank you. Great nuts flakes again. This is Jack Benny speaking and Don Don a Pogo stick is a good mode of transportation, but it's not the one I use today Oh, well, how did you come to work on your bicycle now roller skates now? Well, I give up Jack. How did you get here? It's simple done I put on my track outfit bent down on one knee Rochester untied the goat and wham here. I am I Ran all the way You should have seen him Don. He runs like a deer. Thanks, Mary. An old tire deer Well, I made it that's all I know Imagine running 10 miles why you must be all worn out Jack. No, no, I feel fine Don You see I had to stay under 35 on account of my rubber shoes By the way by the way, Mary, how did you get here? Did you have any trouble? Of course not. I just stood on the corner of Sunset Rocksbury fix my garter and wham here I am. Oh Why didn't I think of that? Darn it. Yes, Jack. It might have worked for you, too. You have rather attractive limbs. Well, I've seen better-looking limbs holding up Burma Shave ads The word is signs there You got a much bigger laugh on science At least Mary my legs were good enough to run all the way from Beverly Hills. I think that we're trying to get away from your body Now I haven't got my car anymore. I ran to work now forget it Oh, I just can't get over it Jack a man your age running ten miles Oh for me, that's nothing done. Why the first job I ever had I used to run up and down all day long Up and down up and down. My goodness Jack. What were you doing? I was a grape smasher in a winery Had the bluest feet Really? Oh, hello, Dennis. Hello, Mr. Vinnie. Hello, Mary. Hello, Don. Hello, Phil. Phil isn't here yet. Oh, then I'll save it They can't how'd you get the studio today? It was easy. I paddled here in my canoe In a canoe. It's great a little bit. You can do it You can do it nobody else Say Don no more canoes for me. I nearly got drowned on Vine Street What Dennis? I'd like to find out one thing How can you get drowned on Vine Street? Oh, it's a lot of trouble. You got a fall in a manhole Well, that'll do it every time kid. Well, here he is. Hi you Jackson. Look who I brung to the program Well, I'll be darned. He's got his kid with him. Where's the baby's nurse Phil? Alice won't let her go out with it Isn't she cute? Hello, honey buns. Honey buns, it's your uncle Jackie What's the matter with that kid? Every time she sees me she cries Oh, she's probably jealous because you've got big blue eyes and feet to match Yeah, that's it. Well, that's certainly a cute outfit the baby's wearing Phil. Oh, look at those little shoes and those panties Yeah, ain't them dapper diapers? Oh They're darling they feel we've got a long play to do tonight So how about giving out with a band number? Okay, hold the baby Well, come on take her. Okay. I hope she oh, well, I'll take it Come here darling. Come here to your uncle Jackie There she goes again I didn't do anything to her Quiet. Quiet now darling Ladies and gentlemen, while Jack is attempting to calm down Phil's baby Let me tell you about America's most stinky flake cereal. Those toasty brown sweets are not great nut flakes You will find that great nut flakes are a thrifty buy on the big 12 ounce economy size package and be sure to look for Kate Smith's picture on the box Well, okay, Phil. Let's have your Kate Smith's picture on the box Did you say Kate Smith? Why certainly don't you eat great nuts flakes? Every morning, but I eat them out of a bowl that out of the box Kate Smith Kate Smith's picture. Well after all Jack great nuts flakes used to be her program. Well, it's mine now. She better get off that box Now don't get excited Jackson. Don't get excited. Yeah, I come out. All right. I wasn't brown Talking about you. I want my picture on that body think you're back at the winery. I Know where I am. I'm gonna straighten that picture business out right now. You better play something Phil better die Righty better play something while he's doing it. I'm getting on that fold. Mr. Chapin the sponsor is gonna hear about this Hello operator. Give me long distance. New York But mr. Chapin But mr. Chapin as long as I'm on great nuts flakes program now my picture ought to be on the box Sure, Kate Smith is a lovely girl. So am I I mean, I'm a lovely fella Now look look mr. Chapin. Let's not bicker about it. All I want is a direct answer. Is it yes or no? Not so fast I hate it snap judgment now look Now look, but mr. Chapin, but miss but mr. But miss But mr But miss try madam, but madam Look at it this way, mr. Chapin Mothers all over the country are buying great nuts place and the kiddies ought to have a chance to see a picture of their uncle Jackie Who's trying to get sympathy that Phil Harris's baby not me All right, take it over mr. Chapin and call me back. Goodbye Well, that's my fault After all what can you accomplish talking over a telephone? Why don't you put on your tracksuit and run to New York? I know one thing I'm gonna get my picture on that box. What box? Oh be quiet Let's get started with our play Ladies and gentlemen Tonight we are going to present our version of one of the most pretentious pictures of the season none other None other than 20th century Fox's production of that sparkling melodrama that sophisticated epic that dramatic thunderbolt tales of Manhattan Thank You crumb cake now this now this This picture which was produced By Boris Morris and SP Eagle. What's the SP for he came out from New York on the Southern Pacific The You get it Billy Now this picture among other great performers Peaches that famous stars as Charles Boyer Rita Hayworth Thomas Mitchell Ginger Rogers Edward G. Robinson and Charles Lawton all of whom will appear on this program tonight Gosh are all those big stars gonna be on our show. Yes, and they should be here now. Where's our producer? Oh, oh, mr. Well, yes, mr. Benny Did you get in touch with? All those stars will tell me to be here tonight. Oh, let's see This is gonna be embarrassing. I can just feel it or heaven's sake. So you forgot to do it Well, all I can say is Welch. You're a fine producer mr. Benny in my office at young and Rubik am I have 12? Telephones on my desk so what if I ever get them untangled watch my smoke Couldn't call them up. He couldn't think of it. Well, what are we gonna do Jackson? Well? Well, I'll think of something. Hey, mr. Benny. I'll bet our play will never top the one Fred Allen did last week Allen oh is a nasal hazel back on the The last The last I heard of him. He was at the Mayo brothers clinic. Oh, did they operate on Allen? No, Don. There were so many things wrong with them. They just gave him a good luck charm and sent them home Well so much for good news and now ladies and gentlemen our play will go on immediately after which I'll take it probably mr. Chapin calling back Hello, oh mr. Benny. This is Rochester. Oh Rochester. What do you want boss? You know that buggy you bought to take the place of the Maxwell? Yes, what about the buggy? Well, I've been trying and trying now wait a minute Rochester with a little training My polar bear can become just as gentle and easy to handle as a horse But that bears in an ugly mood. It's winter time and he's supposed to be sleeping. This is war. Let him stay out a Rochester All you got to do is put the harness on them speaking of that harness He had it on me three times today. Oh He was just being playful. Did you put the bit in his mouth? Yeah, and he chewed it up like bubblegum Well, that's your fault if he doesn't behave give him a good wrap on the nose wrap on the nose Yes, help. It's hard to get now boss. Don't kick it off for heaven's sake. Well, let it go Tomorrow morning. I'll do the job myself. Goodbye. Goodbye. Oh say boss now. What are you coming home to dinner tonight? Of course, I'm coming home to dinner Okay, you'll have to go honey. Can't be talking to car michael sing Dennis A dream that I a dream that I feature attraction this evening The benny acting as our meat, but we've been rationed players We'll present that sensational melodrama Pants of manhattan that's tales of manhattan. Isn't it jack? Of course it is don. I was just trying for a gas I can't stand a guy that presses even if it's pants Oh sit down melon head again So here we go folks with our feature attraction and as a special treat I am playing the triple part of charles boye Charles lawton And edward g robinson this I got to see You'll see it. Don't worry take it mr. Wilson Presenting pants of manhattan with that all-star cast jack benny Thank you If you remember the picture ladies and gentlemen the opening sequence presented a tense love triangle Featuring rita hayworth as the wife Thomas Mitchell as the husband and charles boye as the other man. Uh, that is me Charles boye Oh pull up your eyelids Hmm the scene is the trophy room of the long island the state of mr. Thomas Mitchell the famous big game hunter Mr. Mitchell is talking to his wife Darling, I love you and you can't leave me. Do you hear you can't leave me? I'm sorry, thomas, but I'm afraid This is the end. Well, what about our children our children that I play with every day We haven't any children. They belong to the family next door Oh, so that's why they're older than I am I'm leaving you at once. I know it's another man. Tell me his name rita. Tell me his name and I'll kill him like in the picture No, you'll never know thomas. You'll never know the name of the man. I love Oh child darling at last you're here rita my beautiful Kiss me Excuse me mr. Boye. Now come on rita. What's the name of that other man? Go away. Oh rita my darling Close your eyes and kiss me again. How else can I do it? Rita, I love you. Pardon me mr. Boye. Now listen rita. I wish you'd tell me who your lover is so I can go out and shoot him He is a speech rita my beautiful Does your husband know about me? I don't think so. In fact, I'm p-o-s-i-t-i-v-e Give me that again. Will you Well, I must go now sweetheart. I will see you later Wait These secret meetings can't go on any longer. I must tell my husband the name of my lover Rita be careful. He has a gone. Yes, you might as well know I love your wife and she's going away with me Far far away. How far can you go on four gallons a week? That is my warning. Come Rita. Let us go. Oh, no, you don't take that. I am shoot Right in the pants of Manhattan Everything is going black I cannot see I am dying. Uh, hello Who? Mr. Shaping What? Very well Naturally, if you feel that katesmith's picture should stay on the box That is all right with me What do I care? I am dying Dying I tell you Die full episode in the tales of Manhattan occurred when mr. Charles Lutton as a poor but talented musician Received an opportunity to perform at Carnegie Hall Now in our play, mr. Lutton's part will be portrayed by jack belly that eminent eminent. What the scene is backstage at Mr. Lutton is waiting to go on I got from boyeh. I couldn't find a needle in thread. So I put a cork in it And play by violin and it has never been played I am the first number ladies and gentlemen I will play the meditation from taize By barney dean Titans eat bands of man The tales of Manhattan when was edward g robinson once a prominent lawyer But now a bower a derelict is invited to a reunion of his college classmates Mr. Robinson's part will be played by none other than jack Benny that talented talented. What? The following scene takes place During the height of a banquet when the college men discover that they're My classmate is now a bum Yeah They invited me to come up here. Yeah, you thought I was a businessman. Yeah Well, I ain't seen i'm just a bowery bum seen but you stuff church wouldn't understand that now Now now wed with my boy I ain't blaming you, mr. Harris. It ain't your fault. I can't understand it You was the most prominent student in my class Why you could speak everything from Italian to Egyptian Oh, yeah, good heavens lad ain't there nothing I learned just stuck in your bean What say which one of you is robinson I am see and if anybody's around here looking for trouble on the goddess in garrison. Yeah I'm tough see and that reminds me there's something else. I want to take care of right now Hello operator. Give me new york. See New york I want to speak to mr. Chapin a general fool. See Hello Chapin. Let me tell you something. I've had enough of this See either Kate Smith picture goes off that boxy and my picture goes on see or I ain't waiting next sunday. Yeah Oh for heaven's sake. Do you realize who you're talking to? I know what I'm doing. I'll get away from me. See What do you want? I thought I told you to stay away from my wife. I am shoot I Can see fans of manhattan food dollars this week Make a certain that a part of each food dollar goes to the purchase of cereals Whole grain cereals such as grape nuts flakes. Now. Why do I say that? Why it's because whole grain cereals are a plentiful frifty source of food essential all of us need every day For a really robust good health and you can't do better than choose grape nuts flakes For delicious toasty brown grape nuts flakes are a whole grain cereal So they provide essential whole grain food values Including iron and two of the important b vitamins Niacin and vitamin b1 both so necessary for steady nerves and abundant energy And that whole grain nourishment is really economical food value For when you buy grape nuts flakes in the big 12 ounce economy package It costs you but a penny a survey a small price to pay for so much goodness All around nourishment plus rich distinctive flavor So give the folks a swell start for the day you can do it the grape nuts flakes way Friends for hot breakfast with more smiles for mouthful serve your folks delicious hot grape nuts sweet meal It's extra delicious extra nutritious. It cooks extra fast This program came to you from hollywood. This is the national broadcasting company